Another when to seek fertility help question - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 9 Old 05-17-2012, 12:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm hoping someone can give me some advice on when to seek outside help to get pg. Here's my situation. I have a 2 yo DD who we conceived on the second try and first cycle charting. I was one of "those" people who I now can't stand. winky.gif

We never used protection after having her and my PPAF returned last April (2011). I'd say we weren't doing a good job with timing until June. Since last June I've charted and we've had well time intercourse every month. I had a short luteal phase and was taking supplements and going to acupuncture and taking herbs. It didn't get my LP longer than 9 days. I was also nursing my DD up until October 2011. In January 2012, I saw an OB and he basically said that we can do a SA, blood work and HSG when I hit the one year mark (April 2012). In the meantime, he was willing to give me a script for Prometrium to be taken orally after ovulation. The first month I took it, my LP was 12 days and AF showed up before I stopped the Prometrium. I also had some light spotting during my LP. The second month, I ovulated much earlier (CD 13 vs CD 15 - 19) and got a BFP. I kept on the Prometrium, but found out at my first pre-natal that the baby had stopped developing 2 weeks earlier. I had a D&C in mid-March. We were given the green light to try again this past month. I took Prometrium again and I'm now 12 DPO. I had several days of spotting again and have been getting BFNs so I'm pretty sure I'm out.

So, we've been trying for a little over a year, but I had a loss in that time. Does that mean I have to try again for a year since the loss, or should I seek help at this point? I don't want to delay intervention if that's where I'm headed.

I know this is only the very tip of the fertility iceberg, and that I have no idea what many of you have gone through, but I'd like to say that even this modest amount of disappointment has been really hard. So, I hope it's ok that I'm posting here, but I definitely don't want to undermine the difficult journeys that many of you have had or are having. If this isn't the right place for me to ask these questions, please let me know.

S (35yo) wife to T (36yo) and mamma to my princess M (5/10/10).  After 3 losses in 2012, found an AMAZING doctor and gave birth to baby sister S on 11/12/13.
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#2 of 9 Old 05-17-2012, 02:24 PM
 
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I would think you would be fine getting more information now.  I don't think you should have to wait another year.  They do usually say 1 year of trying before you get more advanced help, and I don't think the m/c should affect that timeline.  I'm sorry you had to go through that.  Good luck to you1




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#3 of 9 Old 05-17-2012, 03:23 PM
 
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I think if you've been charting for at least 6 months with no result you should seek more help. Getting started can take a while. Getting a first appointment as a new client with an RE can take months.


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#4 of 9 Old 05-17-2012, 04:11 PM
 
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Get more info now...I have a very similar story in terms of previous birth, miscarriage, etc. Tests can give you a starting point. FWIW, I had some awful test results (very low amh, high fsh) but now have healthy baby #2, probably thanks to prometrium. I was told to take it from 3 days after ovulation until about 10 weeks along.  Good luck! (Your ob can probably run basic tests before she even refers you to an RE).

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#5 of 9 Old 05-17-2012, 07:56 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks ladies. I've reached out to a friend for an RE referral. Guess I'll be calling tomorrow for an appointment.

S (35yo) wife to T (36yo) and mamma to my princess M (5/10/10).  After 3 losses in 2012, found an AMAZING doctor and gave birth to baby sister S on 11/12/13.
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#6 of 9 Old 05-19-2012, 07:14 AM
 
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If you have something that is clearly wrong with your cycles (such as a LP shorter than 10 days), I think its best to seek help right away and lie about how long you've been trying (if it's been less than 1 year).

 

I knew I had issues with my LP before I even started TTC. I went to my gynecologist after 4 months of TTC and he blew me off. I finally saw an RE after 9 months of TTC (this time I lied and told them I'd been trying for a year). Now I've been TTC for 1 year, 9 months. I still haven't gotten a BFP but I've just gotten diagnosed with endometriosis. I'm pretty annoyed that my Dr. never took my seriously the first time and I'm extremely happy that I got help as soon as I did because not getting help would only have prolonged this whole process which is already long enough!

 

Also I wanted to tell you that all the suffering you've been through is totally valid. You shouldn't feel guilty about any of your emotions just because of how long you've been trying or because you've gotten a BFP (miscarriages are very painful!!!!). In my situation I think the first year of TTC was the most difficult because I knew I had a problem but I couldn't get any help for it! Since then I've been seeing a psychologist who has helped me enormously and I just wanted to pass on to you some of her advice: trying to conceive is a very difficult thing to go through emotionally (when it's not working) and all your emotions are completely valid.


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#7 of 9 Old 05-19-2012, 11:43 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks Sourire! I appreciate your input and your comments about validating my feelings. I just made an appointment with the RE. I should be getting more info in the coming month.

S (35yo) wife to T (36yo) and mamma to my princess M (5/10/10).  After 3 losses in 2012, found an AMAZING doctor and gave birth to baby sister S on 11/12/13.
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#8 of 9 Old 05-24-2012, 05:23 PM
 
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SKJ: I just wanted to echo Sila and Sourrie since they're so brilliant :) Also, I don't want to scare you, but you just never know how long your TTC (and possibly IF) journey will be. I think the sooner you can get some good, solid advice, the better. I also think that any doctor who tells you to wait a year isn't worth his/her weight in poo. My very first RE told me that it doesn't matter what the conventional timelines are - it's your body and if you feel like you want to get some tests and insights, then that's what you should do. Try to surround yourself with medical professionals who respect your own sense of what you need - it will make the journey a little easier. Also, I just want to say that your compassion and grace shone brilliantly through your first post. No need to worry about offending us IF lasses. We're usually all very happy to help if we can :) Good luck to you!!!! I hope lengthening your LP does the trick.

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#9 of 9 Old 05-24-2012, 06:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks teresaresa - I agree that more information can't hurt. I went ahead and got an appointment for this coming Tuesday. Depending on what the doc says, I may be spending lots more time with you lovely ladies smile.gif

S (35yo) wife to T (36yo) and mamma to my princess M (5/10/10).  After 3 losses in 2012, found an AMAZING doctor and gave birth to baby sister S on 11/12/13.
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