The One Thread is designed for all on the MDC board. No matter where you are in your cycle, you are welcome to join the One Thread! We are also open to those who are "Waiting to be Ready" for one reason or another. We continue to embrace those of us who struggle with infertility or challenges becoming pregnant. Feel free to jump in at any time and introduce yourself!
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:heartbeat November BFP's
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Well I am OPK testing now, it should be positive tomorrow, but might be late since the MC, probably not more than a couple days though. My shipment arrives tomorrow, so I am in the clear at this point. I am not particularly excited or positive about this upcoming cycle, I just like the idea that I am continuing to move forward. I will keep you all posted.
I am sooo sleepy tonight, so I am sorry I haven't responded to everyone's updates. I will touch base with you all again shortly!
Today is CD 6. Just kinda hanging out, still a bit down in the dumps/blah. Nothing really going on right now.
So sorry for everything you are going through @radiowave. I definitely need to find some things to distract myself with right now. Sorry to hear you were so sick. Hope you can get your daughter some help.
Sorry to hear you are finding the first trimester so emotionally hard @chuord
@tinytina
I love that you keep on going. That is exactly how we all get in the journey. Your baby is waiting I can feel it. : hug
I have not idea how to give a hug on tapatalk but I am giving you a big big hug. You are so strong!
Radio - thanks! I know it is the psychological that you fear, I was worried about that too cos like you (and many of us) I'm sensitive to hormones. Seriously one day at a time, and when you find yourself feeling teary or angry just remind dh it's not you it's the hormones and get him to hold you. You typically only stim for 11 days, you can feel the follicles growing by the end, and the other thing I kept reminding myself - I'm in control, I chose to do this to get my baby, and if I needed to I could stop anytime but I'm strong enough to get that baby. Tracy you'd agree it helps?
Re your daughter, could you explain to the therapist and maybe have one day a week she sees her and the other you do a session at home (like homework) that she takes in the next time? That would save a little bit... If her stress is from your tension, you are the one that needs the treatment
Angeebaby - hope everything works on time for you!
Tina - hugs, it's truly hard but I'm with Tracy your time will be soon... Hang onto that strong determination. Maybe you need to do something random like a romantic picnic with dh or a girls night out - you can drink right now
Hi ladies - well I would normally get a positive OPK today, but my lines have been pretty light the last few days. I tested this morning and as soon as I got home from work (that one was difficult, thought I was going to pee my pants!!) but still pretty light. I just took another one (as I started typing this update!) and it looks a LOT darker than earlier, so hopefully I get a positive by morning.
I know its silly, but there is an event at work I want to go to Thursday night, so getting a positive opk tomorrow afternoon or evening will nix that. I was just thinking about it, asking myself why I can't just get pregnant like everyone else so it would be a non issue. Essentially, a poor me moment. This is a tough route we are all on, but I know it will be worth it. Actually, even if I can't get pregnant, at least I know I have done my damnedest to try and make it happen!
Feeling tired and a little down. I will hit the sack and hope for a positive in the morning. OH! and my shipment arrived safe and sound today, that one is always a worry too.
I know its silly, but there is an event at work I want to go to Thursday night, so getting a positive opk tomorrow afternoon or evening will nix that. I was just thinking about it, asking myself why I can't just get pregnant like everyone else so it would be a non issue. Essentially, a poor me moment.
I think we all know that feeling well. For me it's about staying pregnant, but the feeling is the same.
AFM: I've always thought of my cycles as "long but regular." I don't track ovulation normally so I don't look at Fertility Friend too closely, but today I noticed a little blurb that said "your cycles are irregular." Sure enough, looking over the last two years of cycles the length is all over the place. Now I feel stupid for not mentioning this to the RE when I saw him. They were considerably more regular before all these miscarriages, but not quite the clockwork I was thinking they were.
I'm not sure if I should do anything with this information. I don't really have the energy to go through another round of tests, and we're still waiting for genetics to come back. I think I might just keep it to myself until the next time I need to see my OB or RE. It doesn't seem worth calling them about.
Angee baby - hugs!!!!
Tina - wow love the squirrel and deer!!! What a highlight! Lol whenever we go to the uk we feed the squirrels in Hyde park...
Cry as much as you need to - I always did and it helps get the emotion out... It is a hard path, but these babies know from day dot how much they are loved and wanted... My mum tried 4 years for me, and I've always felt so loved and special to be worth that effort.
Fx for you all!
Today is CD 8. Nothing to report. Time feels to be crawling along right now. Our followup appointment is scheduled for a week from tomorrow.
Yesterday, we ran some errands- did a major project that we have been procrastinating about-- we went and got some items from my time up north professionally shadowboxed (FYI, not cheap even with a major sale on, however we got them for almost 1/3 of the original price).
Today is cd36 which is absolutely maddening! The latest I have ever been in my life is 3 days and I panicked. Dr. said not to worry he kind of figured this would happen it does to most with their first natural AF after IVF and not to worry unless I am 11 days late.
Wish he had mentioned it earlier.
Tifga - sorry! We should have let you know! I didn't realize... Mine was always around 7 days later the cycle after ivf, the one after that a little longer too. I think I found out by experience too!
Tina - I understand! We have some art needs framing but although I've found a great guy haven't done it cos it'll be pricey!
Hugs all round ladies!
Hi ladies. I am stilllll waiting for a positive opk. I sometimes only have one positive digital test (and I test every few hours) so I'm sort of afraid i missed my positive. Of course my cycle might be off due to the mc this month. So, still testing.
My midwife tried to call me earlier but I was at the work event I was excited about. I drank 3 drinks too, oops! I'm good w everything though, so I'm not worried about it.
I know the midwife is calling because she thinks I need yo physically and emotionally heal from this last mc. Thing is, a week prior, I was able to see my egg was empty on the ultrasound. There was no embryo, no yolk, nothing, so I don't feel particularly mournful. If anything, I feel bad that I dont feel bad!
I want to move on w the next cycle. I know my eggs are old, I know every month is a shot in the dark, and im ok w that.
I know it seems sort of dissociative, but I'm at peace with it. I feel like I have to defend my mindset, which makes me feel bad. Almost want to just do ICIs from here on out so I can do them myself.
Just venting I guess. was feeling happy about this next cycle, now I don't. I don't want to wait and i don't feel supported in my decision.
I don't want you to feel like you have to defend your mindset @angeebaby. I just want you to make sure you are okay before going forward with the next cycle. Definitely think about journaling or seeing a therapist/counselor to talk things through. I am sorry you feel unsupported. We all deal with things differently and we all grieve in different ways.
Ditto Tifga! Angeebaby - go with it! I would be with you in thinking of it as less of a loss and more of a never got started... It's your journey - hold onto your control and be positive if you want to xxx
Tifga- how are you doing?
Littlekind - how's things?
Tina - have the emotions calmed down?
Radio - which direction are you going? What was decision re cysts?
Hi everyone!
This thread moves fast. (I am also not online very often).
First, HUGS. Sending positives vibes to all of you.
I started birth control on Sunday, and as per instruction, I connected with the Fertility Clinic to book a sonohysterogram. Unfortunately, I had an increase in the severity of my migraines, and depression-related symptoms. (My sadness is insanely intense, and completely out of my control). I was advised to stop the birth control, and to await the development of a different protocol. I am feeling rather discouraged at the potential for delay, but I understand that is part of the process. I still feeling very lost (and overwhelmed). We will have an official orientation following the sonohysterogram, and I am hoping to get a better sense of the process (and protocol). I wish I had a better sense of the next few months.
Tree hugger - hugs to you too take care of you!
The best advice the re doc gave me was take the biggest vitamin B multi you can, it helps counteract the misery and depression that comes with the extra hormones... Seriously I was in tears all the time and unsure I could cope - it brought it back to where I was in control. Hope it helps you xxx
Re migraines - maybe you need to negotiate which meds you can keep taking?
chuord - thank you, that is exactly how I feel about this last MC! FINALLY! someone understands hah
It is funny, what has frustrated me most about this last cycle, wasn't it taking or not taking, it was managing OTHER people's emotions and expectations. It made it very draining.
When I was feeling like things weren't going the way they should (I had plenty of pregnancy symptoms, but I still felt like it just wasn't quite right, and add in then the empty egg ultrasound) and I talked about it, everyone seemed to tell me I was being negative and needed to change my attitude.
Now I am feeling positive about trying again, and everyone is telling me I need to check my emotions because I have something buried. @#$%^&!!! I will be limiting who I discuss anything with from here on out.
I am moving along, still testing. I looked through my calendar and yesterday was CD 14. That is the latest I have gotten an LH surge previously, but I have the MC and I added in the COQ10 and DHEA, so I am sure things will be a little off from normal. Hoping the surge happens this weekend so I don't have to keep testing from the work bathroom stall! hah
Finally got my period! First ultrasound and blood work monday and they will tell me when to start my estrace.
chourd- thanks for telling me being late happened to you too it made me feel much better.
@treehugger - I second b vitamin complex. It actually can often really help keep migraines away to take a ton of b vitamin, too. And it helps with the "big feelings" as we call them with our son
@angeebaby - there is no accounting for what you will feel in different stages of ttc and loss. No one can tell you what you should feel. There have been times when I was not pregnant, just got my period when I WANTED to be pregnant, and it was a huge blow with a real feeling of loss. And then there was my last miscarriage which was barely a blip for me, emotionally. There is no "try to" or "should" with our feelings, we just need to take them as they are and try to understand them. THat's my two cents anyway.
@tinytina busy in a good way I hope? What's new with you?
@tifga I am glad AF is here and you don't have to wonder anymore!
AFM nothing is going on. It is cd1 (is it weird to point out we're cycle twins now, tifga?) and I fully expected to not be pregnant last cycle. I might not mind to not be this cycle either, because I teach and having a baby in the summer is a wasted opportunity for paid time off. Does that make me sound lazy?
Nice to hear from you, @chuord. When do you go in to the dr next?
Little kind, tifga - that's so cool that you are synced this month
I'm not sure re doc, scheduled is 13 weeks, but I just remembered I can start to wean off the support hormones from week 10 (woohoo) so hopefully that happens rather than wait till 13 weeks!
@angeebaby I know one woman who dealt with her blighted ovum by saying I was never really pregnant because it wasn't a real baby. I know another woman who named the baby and mourned her loss. Everyone deals with it their own way. Good luck and much baby dust for you this month. @tinytina what's going on with you? @LittleKind It does make you sound lazy at all. @chuord I look forward to all your posts. Success stories are awesome.
AFM cd 647 waiting for AF so I can get this party started.
Devilish cd 647??? Seriously? Can they do anything to jump start it? And thanks, I can't leave till you girls get success anyways
Makeitsew - when you get a chance I would mention it, mine tend to be 33 days (average give it take a day) o was around cd 19 which was just ok... Someone mentioned that if much too long the egg can be past it's useby before it's released? So could be hampering fertilisation. I got my hormones back in order with a kiniesiology balance and a few months on vitex, for me it was better then to wean off it (but that may have been cos of ivf hormones).
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