The August 'Whatever' Thread - Page 11 - Mothering Forums

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#301 of 491 Old 08-17-2010, 06:08 PM
 
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Originally Posted by akind1 View Post
Carrie, I haven't ever got evap lines either, but all the cycles I tested early and got bfn's, I was really not pregnant. The cycle I was waited until 12 dpo, and got a bfp, was my cycle. point being, that is why I am a POAS pansy. if I get bfn's early, I sort of give up, because I think (whether it is correct or not) that if I were pregnant, it would show up. so to keep my hopes up and my sanity, I don't test early!

I am looking forward to when I don't need to pump at work anymore. maybe around when DS turns a year old? as it is, I just can't picture weaning him.
I stopped pumping at work when Nora was 13-14 months, but I only worked 3 full days a week, 8 hr shifts. I had a really hard time letting go of it, even though I was DONE with pumping mentally and emotionally. At that point, she was having 1 bottle of expressed milk per day, so I just subbed in soymilk (we are vegan) and she did fine. We still nursed in the morning before work, and after. I nightweaned her shortly after. FWIW, she's almost 2 and still nurses! It's all about encouraging nursing whenever you are together, and setting those boundaries where you need them.

Re - early testing - I didn't do it w/DD. I thought 11 dpo was EARLY (and it is, technically) but I was a newbie to the whole ttc scene and when I got that bfp on the first cycle trying, it was all so perfect. Perfect, perfect, perfect.

Now, it's our 4th cycle trying, nothing is going perfectly, I'm testing early hoping to catch that first light maybe bfp, and I'm emotionally burnt out!! I DON'T KNOW WHY I DO THIS TO MYSELF!! LOL!!

If this isn't our cycle, then next time i'm NOT testing early. Don't let me do it guys! For my sanity!!

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#302 of 491 Old 08-17-2010, 07:05 PM
 
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I fully believe a husband should have as much a say in their family size as the carrying mother
Ideally, yes, both partners would have equal say. But what do you do when there is a disagreement and no one is willing to yield? Who's opinion trumps whom's? It seems a lot of people think that not wanting another child automatically trumps wanting one. I agree with that if the child would not be loved and/or cared for unless the person wanting the child is willing and able to care for the child herself. Otherwise, I think everyone is at a stand still. Neither opinion or desire trumps the other. That's where we are. That's why I put the responsibility to prevent on my H. I'm not going to do anything to try to trick him into getting pg but I'm not going to offer help on preventing if he isn't making any effort himself. He knows that. I told him.

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#303 of 491 Old 08-17-2010, 07:14 PM
 
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Me, again. Sorry for double posting but you all know me by now. I post a lot.

I'm grasping at straws here but I'm wondering how probable you all think it is that I Oed on cd18 rather than cd13. That would make me only 4w4d at the time of the u/s and closer to the size of the sac the doc measured. I put in that tiny bit of ewcf that I had on cd17 internally. I originally only had it in my notes because it was just a tiny bit and I don't usually check internally. I also switched the O detector to Advanced and it moved my crosshairs to cd18.

Honestly, I don't feel pg at all anymore so I don't really have much hope.

ETA: Oops My chart my help

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#304 of 491 Old 08-17-2010, 07:33 PM
 
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I kind of skimmed through everything, we're trying to enjoy DH's last night home, but I'll add some quick thoughts.

MW: I do think it's possible that the O was CD18 instead. it sucks, because if you had even one more temp before your first one, you'd have a better idea of what to think about it. It could have been one fluke low temperature, or it could have been you just catching the start of a temp shift. It's hard to tell. Your cervix did go back to at least mm on day 17 too, so while that's not HSO, it could tell you something.

To me, the first bunch of negative tests seems a bit weird if you o'ed on cd 13, because we know you usually get super early pos, so I would have expected the ones toward the end there to show something... but again, maybe not. I'm sorry, I wish I could glean something more concrete from the chart.


AFM: I think I'm one of the others in a pseudo TWW. We have two possible o dates, and each has one possible BD that could have resulted in something- but only one each, so I'm not feeling super optimistic. That said- I'm still hoping. I asked DH if he'd like to know (if we could) before he left tomorrow, and he said no. So I won't test until next week. I'm 7-10dpo right now. Tenatively expecting AF on the 23rd or sooner.

It's driving me nuts not being able to check my temp. I even tried yesterday to go buy a new thermometer, and in three stores I couldn't find one. To order online will be $25 ish with shipping. Urg. I want it NOW, not in two weeks. My fever one almost always tells me I'm 96~

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#305 of 491 Old 08-17-2010, 07:36 PM
 
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It's driving me nuts not being able to check my temp. I even tried yesterday to go buy a new thermometer, and in three stores I couldn't find one. To order online will be $25 ish with shipping. Urg. I want it NOW, not in two weeks. My fever one almost always tells me I'm 96~
Do you have a walgreens near you that you checked? My walgreens keeps the basal therms by the pg tests! Maybe they have one there?

I'm starting to feel like my temp is going to drop tmw. I'm such a debbie downer.

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#306 of 491 Old 08-17-2010, 07:39 PM
 
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No, I'm in Canada, so I have my pick of Walmart, Superstore (loblaws), and then the drug stores... shoppers drug mart, london drugs, rexall, etc. I tried the first three of those yesterday, no luck. I swear I bought my first one at Superstore, but if my research is leading me in the right direction, then they no longer make it (it was Vicks brand). And Amazon won't deliver to me. Urg.

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#307 of 491 Old 08-17-2010, 07:53 PM
 
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MW: Not to give any false hope, but if you were CTA, I'd have put O on CD 18. There's no way you can confirm O for CD 13 w/one low temp, and it's not common to have two actual shifts...even w/triphasic charts, they often don't get high enough for a full shift in the upper range, or they dip back down too much.

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#308 of 491 Old 08-17-2010, 08:15 PM
 
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Shannon ~ I knew you'd say that because you said it before. If anyone else were asking me, whether CTA or TTC or whatever, I would say the same thing. It's also not uncommon for me to get ewcf and hso cp around cd14, the supposed normal time to O, but not O and have everything start to dry up just to get more fertile again later. It's just driving me crazy that I can't know for sure.

But then there are the lightening hpt lines. On pics of + hpts from when I got pg in May 2009, they were blaringly dark by 18dpo and only got darker. Although, I do remember the hpts getting lighter at some point when I got pg with ds3. Something about the dye reaching and threshold and not being able to register so much hcg. I also had spotting with him around 5w, too. I remember because I ran to the ER. I had an u/s but can't remember what, if anything, we saw.

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Originally Posted by jeninejessica
with your previous losses, how did the spotting and bleeding compare, was there ever a pause in bleeding and then it starting again?
I don't remember it starting and then stopping. I remember it turning pink or red and picking up pretty quickly. However, I didn't start progesterone after the spotting either except when I was pg with ds2. I was using progesterone but decided I didn't need it so stopped it. 4 days later I passed a clot and was bleeding. Ran to the ER and saw a gestational sac and fetal pole at 5w4d. I went back on the progesterone and didn't bleed any more. I think my body is very sensitive to the progesterone. When I used it for IVF, I wouldn't get until 4 days after I stopped it.

Walmart used to sell BBTs. I bought one at a Walmart in HI.

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#309 of 491 Old 08-17-2010, 08:17 PM
 
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Double posting again. I just checked my charts and only one m/c started with spotting and that was only one day then medium flow. All the others started with flow.

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#310 of 491 Old 08-17-2010, 09:17 PM
 
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I hear you! :

So, if you moved the O date to CD18, then you got a positive super early....like 4-5dpo. I've never heard of that being possible. That might have already been mentioned--I don't have time to read through every post tonight. Did you chart before this cycle...do you typically O around the 13th day? How long are your cycles normally? Sorry if you're having to repeat yourself here!


eta: found your previous charts on your homepage site. So, it does look like you O'ed on cd13 or 14 with the open cervix and peak CM. Spotting doesn't mean loss every single time--I spotted through my entire first trimester with #2!

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#311 of 491 Old 08-17-2010, 10:09 PM
 
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wow, lots going on. MW, happy that you started the progesterone and looking forward to hearing what happens at your next appt. "feeling preg" is so unreliable i think- when i'm ttc, feeling pg or not is all a matter of my mood, optimistic or not.
looking forward to the upcoming testing for Mel and babycakes....
cd4 for me. nothing exciting.
on the nursing and pumping thing: i quit pumping at 1 yr but have continued to bf- i come home for naptime during my lunch, nurse him and put him down, and then nurse again at night before bed, and at least once during the night and in AM. this may be too much bf to get pg? but don't think i'll change it. he is so funny about nursing- when i get home for lunch he says, "nurse? sleep?" and goes to the bedroom. guess # 2 will just have to wait til bf slows down...
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#312 of 491 Old 08-17-2010, 11:16 PM
 
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MW, I think CD 18 looks possible.

Am I STILL 6 dpo? Crikey, I know this is the whatever thread, and I am whatever in that I would be ok with either result, but I want to KNOW!

Maybe I should test tomorrow morning. Heck, MW gets BFPs 6 dpo so I should too right?

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#313 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 07:13 AM
 
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Kindermama ~ If I moved my O to cd18, my first definite BFP would have been at 6dpo. According to the website where I get my hpts, it's possible.

Haha, Mel. Hang in there.

hilary ~ When I say I don't feel pg anymore, I'm talking about real symptoms. All last week I had a very heavy and full feeling in my pelvic area. I was getting heartburn all the time and I guess what was morning sickness. It was hard for me to tell at the time because it was mild. I wasn't sure if it was m/s or hunger but not being able to find something I wanted or just nerves. I was getting very tired in the afternoons and was actually able to take naps. The only time I can usually fall asleep during the day is when I'm pg. All of that is gone now.

None of it matters now, anyway. I woke this morning to red blood and an almost negative hpt.

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#314 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 07:51 AM
 
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MW: I'm so sorry.

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#315 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 07:52 AM
 
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I'm so sorry, mw.

And my tests this am were negative!

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#316 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 08:04 AM
 
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I'm sorry, Carrie. It's still early, though. According to the study on FF, most first bfps aren't reported until 13.6dpo.

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#317 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 08:14 AM
 
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W/dd I got an obvious bfp at 11dpo. I just feel so disappointed, my temp went up this am and I was so leery to test but I did anyway. I know it's not over til the fat lady sings, and I'm grateful my lp seems to be getting longer, but that doesn't trump the bitterness of this whole situation.

My MIL and I and Nora are going outlet shopping today. I might buy some new shoes.

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#318 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 08:25 AM
 
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None of it matters now, anyway. I woke this morning to red blood and an almost negative hpt.
Oh I'm so sorry.

Carrie, if your temp is still up you're still in the game...

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#319 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 08:38 AM
 
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#320 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 08:55 AM
 
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I know it's not over til the fat lady sings, and I'm grateful my lp seems to be getting longer, but that doesn't trump the bitterness of this whole situation.
You know your own body best.

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#321 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 09:26 AM
 
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MW-I'm so sorry.

BC-where's your chart?

My temp dropped today, and my cervix is really high. So not sure what is going. I feel like I want to be done temping this cycle. The first high temp was a later time, but yesterday was a normal time. Maybe when I sleep real hard, my temp is lower? I put ccf on my chart, because though dry on paper, internal I was pretty wet, and had that snot mixture going on.
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#322 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 09:37 AM
 
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You know your own body best.
I wish I knew why I'm not getting knocked up. For some reason though...and this might come back to bite me in the end, but I just don't feel out yet.

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#323 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 09:41 AM
 
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MW- My heart goes out to you! It is so hard being pregnant and being alone in your joy! Perhaps, you two need to have a big talk, whether you carry full-term or not. I fully believe a husband should have as much a say in their family size as the carrying mother....but maybe you guys have a different agreement in your marriage, idk. He sure is playing with "fire" by not using protection or abstaining so it makes me wonder...guys can be strange like that! They keep everything inside (well except during ovulation-LOL!)

Kindermama-I agree, but as MW said-what if there is no agreement on who wants to add to the family? What do you do? Yes, I agree that both partners should be on board w/ birth control-especially if charting. But, take me-my dh just doesn't want to know. He doesn't want to hear me tell him I'm fertile, or we're safe etc. So that's basically why I'm on this board, because while I'm charting, and do hope for another babe, dh is just really "whatever", so I feel it's pretty much on him if we were to conceive. I feel like if he wanted to be 100% safe, he would want to be more involved w/ knowing about my chart/how to interpret, or ask if it's safe etc. So to stay over on CTA, feels deceiving, because the "rules" are not being followed 100% by both involved.
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#324 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 09:44 AM
 
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Carrie, I am very given to self doubt in this area, I would be half convinced of pregnancy even with (-) hpts until AF showed, and when I was FINALLY pregnant, I tested nearly every day for 2-3 weeks. the house was literally littered with + hpts. I believe it will happen for you, and when it does, the timing will be perfect

Alysia, I am so sorry, and much to you. hope you and your DH can work through this together

Mel, the TWW goes so slowly, doesn't it? I always tried to take up a project, like crocheting or something, or a really hefty book, to help pass the time.

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#325 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 12:02 PM
 
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I wish I knew why I'm not getting knocked up. For some reason though...and this might come back to bite me in the end, but I just don't feel out yet.
You are right. You are not out yet. You aren't out until shows (and sometimes even then you aren't out). I was reading that lots of women have what seems to be a very light at just the right time but they are actually pregnant.

You haven't been at this long, either, so I wouldn't worry about not being pregnant yet. Even with getting pg the first try last time, you only have a 20% chance in any given cycle. It's perfectly normal for an average, healthy young couple to take a year to get pg and that's just the average. It can take much longer and still be ok. Breastfeeding even just a little can affect things and so can stress. So if you are even the slightest bit more stressed about getting pg now as you were when you tried before, that could make things take longer.

AFM ~ Talked to the nurse at the doc's office. She said I should go to the ER since I'm having some low back pain because that could be indicative of an ectopic. I seriously doubt it. Nothing like that was seen on the u/s on Monday and the back pain is very, very mild, although it's been constant for 4-5 days now. I'm not sure if I'll go. It's such a pain with the LOs. My next door neighbor would watch them. She watched them Monday when I went to the doc. I hate to ask her again, though, because she just got back from being in Spain the entire summer and is trying to get one child off to college and the other ready for school and her ILs are visiting. I texted H to tell him what the nurse recommended but he hasn't answered me. I'm going to call him.

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#326 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 12:18 PM
 
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MW: I'm so sorry that you're going through this again.

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#327 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 02:47 PM
 
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You are right. You are not out yet. You aren't out until shows (and sometimes even then you aren't out). I was reading that lots of women have what seems to be a very light at just the right time but they are actually pregnant.

You haven't been at this long, either, so I wouldn't worry about not being pregnant yet. Even with getting pg the first try last time, you only have a 20% chance in any given cycle. It's perfectly normal for an average, healthy young couple to take a year to get pg and that's just the average. It can take much longer and still be ok. Breastfeeding even just a little can affect things and so can stress. So if you are even the slightest bit more stressed about getting pg now as you were when you tried before, that could make things take longer.
I know it hasn't been that long, but it seems like a long time. I really hope it doesn't take a year.
I thought w/charting, if it takes longer than 3 cycles there might be something up. What do you think?
I am stressing. I know it. Maybe I should back off w/the charting and temping and just see what happens. Do you think at this point I even could?? That's what gets me. I feel like I need to know what's going on.

Ugh. I'm going to bake some brownies.

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#328 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 02:54 PM
 
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I know it hasn't been that long, but it seems like a long time. I really hope it doesn't take a year.
I thought w/charting, if it takes longer than 3 cycles there might be something up. What do you think?
I am stressing. I know it. Maybe I should back off w/the charting and temping and just see what happens. Do you think at this point I even could?? That's what gets me. I feel like I need to know what's going on.

Ugh. I'm going to bake some brownies.
There is something in TCOYF about seeking a medical consultation if you have 3 cycles of well-timed intercourse and aren't pregnant. I don't know that that means there is necessarily something wrong. I think it may just be one of those things to keep in mind. Since you are breastfeeding, though, the normal rules do not apply.

Only you know whether not charting would be more or less stressful for you. You could always try it but then, of course, you are stuck with the extra stress if that's what happens.

I used to feel that I would stress more if I didn't chart and I think I was correct at the time. That was more because I had such long and irregular cycles than because I needed to know exactly when I Oed. In light of recent events, I am considering not temping anymore, maybe just marking on the calendar when I get ewcf so I can have an idea of when to possibly expect .

I baked lemon bars yesterday. I would've preferred brownies but didn't have the ingredients. I still have over half the lemon bars left but can't stomach eating them.

knit.gifSAHM to 3 boys and 1 man; 22 jammin.gif, 9REPlaySkateboard04HL.gif, 5 FIREdevil.gifand now 1 year oldtoddler.gif!

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#329 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 03:41 PM
 
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BC- I've only been charting 1yr. I used to go by cf, and after I had ewcf and dried up, then I would think I was safe. But after reading TCoyF, I know that a body can "gear up" to O, and not, so a person can have multiple patches of ewcf. For me, once I started charting, I saw that there were months I did have more than one patch of ewcf, with dry in between. So, had I not been temping, I would have thought we were safe, when in reality I wasn't. (how we got ds2).
Most of my cycles avg out, so I could go back to not temping, and mark down when I get ewcf for an af estimate. I've been thinking of doing that. I had a 52d cycle, where if I wasn't temping, I would have thought something was wrong, if I kept getting - preg tests. Now I know it's poss to have a long cycle. I sort of feel like I would be tricking dh if I quit temping. Because since I tend to have multiple patches of fertile fluid, I would never know when it was really "safe".
Breastfeeding throws a wrench in the gear. Can't help there. The CtA thread has nursing moms though, who might know more? I thought Tcoyf said to chart 6m to see an established pattern, before starting to worry about causes like not getting preg, or not O'ing etc?
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#330 of 491 Old 08-18-2010, 03:47 PM
 
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MW- So so sorry.

Consciously mothering 3 girls and 2 boys
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