The August CTA/Fertility Awareness Thread - Page 7 - Mothering Forums

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#181 of 318 Old 08-17-2010, 08:03 PM
 
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JJ ~ Answering your question on the Whatevering thread.

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#182 of 318 Old 08-18-2010, 11:14 PM
 
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I'm on my fourth or fifth day of an insane amount of ewcm. I wish I would just freaking O already!! There's just so much ewcm to deal with. I wonder what other women with lots of mucus who aren't aware of fertility signs think is going on during this time, lol?? I mean, there's so much..I can't just not notice it.

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#183 of 318 Old 08-19-2010, 02:15 AM
 
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Originally Posted by MarineWife View Post
I'm grasping at straws here but I'm wondering how probable you all think it is that I Oed on cd18 rather than cd13. That would make me only 4w4d at the time of the u/s and closer to the size of the sac the doc measured. I put in that tiny bit of ewcf that I had on cd17 internally. I originally only had it in my notes because it was just a tiny bit and I don't usually check internally. I also switched the O detector to Advanced and it moved my crosshairs to cd18.

Honestly, I don't feel pg at all anymore so I don't really have much hope.

I think cd16 could be a likely candidate and like PP's have said, cd18 is possible but such a rare BFP that early. (but if you had early BFPs before, it could just be how your body metabolizes the HCG?)
Is an u/s an exact science? Can't it be like any group of children - there is an average size but that doesn't mean there aren't ones that grow at a smaller or greater rate, right? Aren't those weekly measurements just a guideline? It doesn't sound way off even given your earliest possible O date.
I pray your little bean is just getting extra comfy and that's the cause of the pain and bleeding.
Please keep us posted.

Jenn (36), wife to DH for 13 years, DD1(13) , DD2(10) and DS(4)

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#184 of 318 Old 08-19-2010, 08:45 AM
 
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I wonder what other women with lots of mucus who aren't aware of fertility signs think is going on during this time, lol?
I can tell you because I used to be that woman. I distinctly remember when I was 18-20 and would get tons of ewcf and had no idea what it was. I lived at the beach so would wear a bikini almost every day. At those times I would be so paranoid and embarrassed that I was going to have a huge wet spot on my bathing suit that everyone could see. I had no idea what it was and kept thinking I must have had some kind of infection. Yeast, maybe? If only someone had told me that was normal.

Jenn ~ Thanks. It's a moot point now. I had to go to the ER yesterday. My hcg level was only 12 and there was just barely what looked like a possible gestational sac. At 5.5w it should be around 1500-2500. Even if I were a week behind it should still be at least 50. Yes, it can vary a lot but there's no way it should be that low. That's a normal hcg level for around 9-10dpo. That coupled with the bleeding and hpts that are getting lighter and lighter by the day means only one thing. By the way, I'm still got a bfp on a DT hpt this morning with a hcg level of 12 or less. Crazy! All the tests say the lowest they go is 20-25. I do remember now, though, that I got a bfp several years with an Answer Early hpt with the same level, 12.

And, yeah, ultrasound is not an exact science. It has a high level of variability based on the person doing the measuring. But, as I said above, I've been having other issues and the u/s measurements just confirmed it all. I had to go to the ER yesterday. They are calling it a threatened miscarriage for now but I know it's over.

I'm not sure what we'll be doing now. I doubt I'll come back here to CTA. I'm not sure I'll continue charting much at all. I'm thinking maybe I'll just mark on my calendar when I get ewcf so I can have an idea of when I might expect . My dh says he's disappointed about the m/c but still doesn't want to have any more children. At least I got a better reason why. He says he feels guilty about not being around much for the children we have. I can accept that reason.

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#185 of 318 Old 08-19-2010, 10:03 AM
 
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so sorry.
I am glad you and DH are hopefully resolving things though.
And just because you aren't CTA doesn't mean we couldn't use your expertise here! I pray for speedy healing and peace for you and your family.

Jenn (36), wife to DH for 13 years, DD1(13) , DD2(10) and DS(4)

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#186 of 318 Old 08-19-2010, 10:42 AM
 
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MW:
I'm so sorry about all of this! I've been stalking you guys on the whatever thread as well and you have certainly been through it. I can't imagine feeling so unsupported. I hope you find some peace. We will certainly miss you here! How long is your DH home for?
Just curious also, why would you stop charting?

AFM: possible o? what do you think? can I call it?
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#187 of 318 Old 08-19-2010, 11:14 AM
 
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MW: I'm so sorry. I can't imagine.

Mama to two lovely boys and a new baby due mid-May 2011
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#188 of 318 Old 08-19-2010, 11:15 AM
 
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Toolip ~ Looks good to me.

Why would I stop charting? I don't know. Right now I'm just so over all of this. I'm not even sure I want to hope for another pregnancy again because I keep miscarrying. I don't know what would be more painful for me at this point, another m/c or the knowledge that another pregnancy/baby is not even a possibility. Maybe if I had some answers as to why and there were something I could do about and my dh was onboard with not preventing, I'd continue charting. As it is right now, I'm emotionally spent and don't want to do anything, don't want to know anything. Of course, the way I am, not charting probably won't keep me from wondering if I could be pg and testing anyway. I don't know. Guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

ETA: I just read that Annie's baby died. I hope she doesn't mind me passing that along but I thought she might like some hugs and thoughts and such from us if we could go to the I'm Pregnant board and give them to her.

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#189 of 318 Old 08-19-2010, 04:19 PM
 
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I'm so sorry MW. I can only imagine how painful and exhausting it must be to go through that, especially multiple times.

Thanks for letting us know about Annie. to both of you.
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#190 of 318 Old 08-19-2010, 09:57 PM
 
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Oh, not Annie, too!

Annie & MW:

-Shannon, momma to H reading.gif 8/03, N heartbeat.gif 9/06, & P homebirth.jpg 8/11, missing S brokenheart.gif born at 11 wks 1/09 

 


 
   

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#191 of 318 Old 08-19-2010, 10:08 PM
 
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It seems so unfair that such great women have things like this happen. I know that world doesn't work in terms of fairness, but sometimes it feels like it should.

Doula mama, medic daddy and Tenley Harper born naturally 11/29/11 delayedvax.gifbfinfant.giffemalesling.GIFcd.gif

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#192 of 318 Old 08-20-2010, 03:44 PM
 
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I was so excited for Annie. I hope her DH will try again.

*BETH* mother of DD (8) and DS (6) along with 2 dogs, 2 cats and about 100 chickens
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#193 of 318 Old 08-20-2010, 05:41 PM
 
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I posted on here briefly back in April and although we were tta we obviously slipped up and ended up with a bfp and due jan. 18th. My son died in utero and I was induced at 17 wks (on 8/9/10).
Started charting again and am really struggling bcs I really want to be pg and dh really really is done (at least for now). I just came home from a meeting with the NFP couple that teaches our class and was able to have a review. I have started my chart but am having a hard time bcs I am not sleeping well, don't always wake up in the same room as my thermometer, and am pretty damn depressed so this is the last thing on my mind.
I will be posting on here to try and figure this deal out. I think my cycles will probably be a bit wonky for a while.

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#194 of 318 Old 08-20-2010, 05:53 PM
 
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theboysmama, I'm so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are w/ you.

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#195 of 318 Old 08-21-2010, 08:21 AM
 
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Nicole ~ I am so sorry for your loss.

For everyone ~ Look what I came across while reading about miscarriage.

Quote:
Many books tell you that sperm can last for 5 days and the egg for 24 hours. While this is technically true on the very long end (and something to follow if you trying to NOT get pregnant), most sperm will only last about two hours if you do not have fertile-quality cervical mucus for it to swim in. The sperm will struggle to swim up to your uterus, use all its reserves, and not make it. The egg typically lives only about 12 hours, so it cannot wait for long.
(my bolding)

Link: SMEP

I'm not saying that everyone can chill and not worrying about abstaining or using protection unless they have watery/ewcf. However, maybe not stress too much after the fact about dtd unprotected on a dry or sticky day within 5-6 days of O.

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#196 of 318 Old 08-21-2010, 08:55 AM
 
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If my temps confirm ovulation among my other normal signs, but I got a negative ovulation test, does that mean I didn't ovulate this cycle? It's the first cycle after a m/c. I've never used an OPK so that's one reason I'm asking, the line was fainter then the test line and it says that's negative. I took one the night before I supposedly ovulated (diluted test, I had just bought them and was anxious to try it so that probably wasn't accurate), then the morning of, and in the afternoon on ovulation day. don't know if this makes any difference with the results.

oh just a note on the sperm thing, I got pregnant with sperm living 6 days, and I never get really good EWCM...so anything is possible! Gotta be real careful if you really really don't want to be pregnant.

Christian SAHM & birth doula.
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#197 of 318 Old 08-21-2010, 09:16 AM
 
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OPKs are not as reliable as temps. If you have a clear and sustained thermal shift, I would disregard the opk. That being said, if you haven't had an since a m/c, your hormones could be all out of whack and temps could be off.

And, yeah, we all know it's possible to get pg from dtd 5-6 days from O. That's why the quote I posted says not to disregard it if you are TTA. It is very unlikely, though, if you are dry or have only sticky CF. By the way, creamy CF is considered fertile, especially for TTA purposes. So when it says fertile-quality CF, I don't think only watery/ewcf. That's just the most fertile. Fertile-quality CF includes creamy for TTA purposes (and TTC purpose, for that matter). Also, I'm not sure what you mean by "really good ewcm". You don't need a lot and it doesn't need to stretch forever. The slightest bit of slippery, wet, clear CF is potentially fertile.

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#198 of 318 Old 08-21-2010, 09:45 AM
 
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yeah by good EWCM I mean stretchy, and mine never stretches, so I really don't rely on CM for any indication of what's going on, but that's me.

Christian SAHM & birth doula.
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#199 of 318 Old 08-21-2010, 10:18 AM
 
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I conceived dd 6 days before o with no fertile mucus. It was not dry but just barely sticky. But that his how we got a dd out of the deal.

I have a question about the nfp rules for after a m/c (2nd tri loss at 17 wks, induction with very little bleeding, bleeding done by day 5, spotted a bit last night and not sure what that is about, really not much trama to the body, temps are back in the normal range, haven't taken a hpt yet to confirm it is neg.). I met w/ our nfp instructor yesterday and in the literature it sais that we are to obstain until phase 3 after the first af. I don't think that is going to fly here. Will nfp work if we are following the normal rules and obstain as soon as we have any cm at all? thanks

nicole wild.gif,  mom to 3 boys here on earth jumpers.gif 9, 7 and 4.5 and 2 girl's fly-by-nursing2.gif2.5 and 10/16/11. Always remembering my babies in heaven:  Sam (9/7/05) at 12.5 wks  angel1.gif, Morgan (2/13/06) at 6 wks angel1.gif , Emeric angel2.gif (8/9/10 at 17 wks) and Pepper angel1.gif (11/26/10) at 8wks. 

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#200 of 318 Old 08-21-2010, 11:37 AM
 
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I think cycles are so different for each person after a m/c and that's why I was trying the OPK. If I counted the first day I started bleeding as day 1 (which my midwife told me to), I O'd on day 10, waaay early. So I don't have an answer I'm just in the same boat...

Christian SAHM & birth doula.
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#201 of 318 Old 08-21-2010, 01:20 PM
 
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Nicole ~ I am so sorry for your loss.

For everyone ~ Look what I came across while reading about miscarriage.

(my bolding)

Link: SMEP

I'm not saying that everyone can chill and not worrying about abstaining or using protection unless they have watery/ewcf. However, maybe not stress too much after the fact about dtd unprotected on a dry or sticky day within 5-6 days of O.
thank you MW!

for all the losses

AFM: I think I have a true CD 1. Fingers crossed for a nice normal month so I can see what is going on. I don't know if I ever really O'ed.
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#202 of 318 Old 08-21-2010, 01:49 PM
 
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Fingers crossed for you, Toolip!

I had day two of high temps, so I hope it stays that way tomorrow! DH and I DTD last night (we were a bit, ahem, under the influence, and that's kinda just what happens when in that state, lol) but he did pull out. I think we need condoms on hand or something! It's been really hard for us to abstain while we're trying to figure out wtf if going on w/ my body. So, if I do get pg this month, I'll be kinda stressed and freaked, but it WILL be my fault. DH is kinda panicked. The only thing that doesn't make me so panicked is that my lp w/ DS1 pp was sooooo short, so I'm hoping it will be that way this time, too. I know you guys have said that the body resets, so you can't count on the last time, but I'm just crossing my fingers here!

So, I do believe I will be adding condoms to my grocery list! LOL! I don't want to make using them a habit--I just really don't like the idea of them for a variety of reasons--but I don't want to get in a situation like I was last night. Sigh.

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#203 of 318 Old 08-21-2010, 02:12 PM
 
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yeah by good EWCM I mean stretchy, and mine never stretches, so I really don't rely on CM for any indication of what's going on, but that's me.
EWCF does not have to be stretchy. Like I said, if it's slippery or lubricative or you have a slippery vag sensation even with no visible CF, you are supposed to consider that ewcf and very, very fertile.

nicole ~ Everything I've read about the first "cycle" after a m/c (I've been reading a lot lately since I'm recovering from one as well.) is that it's not a true cycle. You cannot consider the first day of bleeding from a m/c or D&C as CD1. You are supposed to wait until you get another bleed and then you can start with cd1 of a, hopefully, normal cycle. You can certainly temp and keep track of CF but you shouldn't rely on any of it to assume that you are safe.

ETA: When CTA any CF other than your BIP, which can only be either dry or sticky, is considered potentially fertile. That means that you should abstain or use protection as soon as you see any CF other than your BIP. If your BIP is dry, you need to start using precautions as soon as you have sticky CF. If your BIP is sticky, you need to start using precautions as soon as you have creamy CF, but understand that using sticky as your BIP is slightly riskier and can only be done if you do not have any dry days.

Toolip ~ I don't think you can be certain that you Oed so you have to consider yourself potentially fertile during . You cannot rely on the FFD rule. I'm not sure about the rule after is done. Anyone else know? Can you consider yourself safe the first dry day and on until get sticky CF or do you have to wait for 4 consecutive dry days?

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#204 of 318 Old 08-21-2010, 04:49 PM
 
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Toolip ~ I don't think you can be certain that you Oed so you have to consider yourself potentially fertile during . You cannot rely on the FFD rule. I'm not sure about the rule after is done. Anyone else know? Can you consider yourself safe the first dry day and on until get sticky CF or do you have to wait for 4 consecutive dry days?

yeah, I'm not considering myself safe at all until I get a nice, regular O cycle. I'm just hoping this is the beginning of one (a regular cycle that is)
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#205 of 318 Old 08-21-2010, 06:14 PM
 
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yeah, I'm not considering myself safe at all until I get a nice, regular O cycle. I'm just hoping this is the beginning of one (a regular cycle that is)

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#206 of 318 Old 08-22-2010, 07:24 AM
 
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Hi ladies. I'm back.

Marinewife, thanks for sharing the news over here. I was not looking forward to having to explain it again so I really appreciate it. Also, I know I said something on one of your other threads, but I'm so sorry for your loss.

I started a new chart with CD 1 being the day I had the D&E. I know that is not a true CD 1 but it's the easiest way for me to keep track of everything in FF. I started temping this morning and that was very hard. The last temp that flashed on my therm this AM was 98.9 which was my temp from the last time I temped during my pregnancy.

theboysmama, I'm not sure of all your details surrounding your loss but I know that my OB specifically told me that I should avoid pregnancy for the next three cycles because of the D&E. I also received the same advice from the director of the NFP program at my parish who is also a physician. The reasoning behind this is that I need to let my uterine lining recover from the D&E. If I were to become pregnant soon, my body may not be able to sustain the pregnancy. DH and I have not discussed this yet but I think that we will avoid intercourse until after we can definitely confirm O for the next couple of cycles. I'm not supposed to resume intercourse anyway for at least two weeks so we have some time. Also, while DH is very much on board about another baby, we both agreed that we have some work to do physically and mentally before we are ready to not avoid. I anticipate that taking at least 6 months.

I haven't checked the front page but whoever's running the list right now, can you remove me from the graduates? I don't know if I should go back in as charting from December 2007 or if I should go down as charting from August 2010. Do whatever you think is best.

Here's a link to my chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/1f0436

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#207 of 318 Old 08-22-2010, 09:22 AM
 
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So sorry for your loss, Annie. It sounds like you have a good plan. (((HUGS)))


I think I can confirm O will three high temps. The day I did O, I cramped so bad, too! I was insane. I guess I can chalk it up to the first time my body did that in a while, so it took some work to get that egg through...or something, lol! It really hurt! I'm just wondering why FF didn't give me the crosshairs? I thought it was three days?
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#208 of 318 Old 08-22-2010, 10:15 AM
 
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Annie - I was induced w misoprostil (cytotec) at 17 wks. I had very little bleeding and my mw said we could resume STD when the bleeding had stopped and my cervix had closed. 3 months seems to be the standard after a d & e or d& c but after my 12 wk Loss 5 yrs ago done natural w no induction my dr and mw both said that it was fine to conceive immediately. It took 14 wks for me to o so my body waited on it's own. We lost that baby at 6wks and conceived 3 wks later and had a healthy ds.
We r tta at the moment so don't plan on getting pg for quite a while, plus I really think my body needs time as I was pg for 17 wks. My question was if I could chart as normal or if we really needed to obstain.
I guess what I am getting is that nfp isn't very reliable following a loss as each woman and circumstance varies so much.
Has anyone successfully used nfp after a loss or did u obstain or rely on other methods?
Thanks ladies for all your patience with me.

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#209 of 318 Old 08-22-2010, 10:35 AM
 
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Annie ~ again. I wasn't sure if I should share what happened here. I hoped it would give you some semblance of comfort knowing that all of us here care about you.

katie ~ I'm not sure why FF has not given you crosshairs. Maybe because you have ewcf on cd35 and you have a few very high outlying temps from before so FF isn't sure that those temps are thermal shift? Have you tried another O detector? If yours is set to Advanced, try it on FAM. That sometimes changes things. You've got dtd on cds30 and 35. Were those protected/withdrawal?

knit.gifSAHM to 3 boys and 1 man; 22 jammin.gif, 9REPlaySkateboard04HL.gif, 5 FIREdevil.gifand now 1 year oldtoddler.gif!

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Quote:
Originally Posted by theboysmama View Post
3 months seems to be the standard after a d & e or d& c
I was reading on the pg loss website that the 3 month thing is more for emotional healing than physical healing. Intuitively, it makes sense to me that you'd have to wait longer after a D&C because the uterine lining is scraped much thinner than it would get with a natural m/c. Also, I would think that having the uterine lining scraped would cause more of a sore or rawness than a natural m/c. I don't have any facts to back that up, though, and that website said that was not actually the case. The other thing, from a medical perspective, seemed to be the inability to date the pregnancy accurately since there would not be any true cd1. That probably wouldn't apply if you were charting and temping except that most docs don't consider charts and temps reliable.

Quote:
Originally Posted by theboysmama View Post
My question was if I could chart as normal or if we really needed to obstain.
I guess what I am getting is that nfp isn't very reliable following a loss as each woman and circumstance varies so much.
Has anyone successfully used nfp after a loss or did u obstain or rely on other methods?
I think it really depends on how much you want to prevent. If you absolutely do not want to get pg again right now, I say abstain (if you are using strict NFP) until after your next bleed.

I've been wondering whether or not to prevent/abstain until I get another bleed. I haven't in the past after my early m/cs and did get pg again once the very next cycle but I m/ced that pg, too. After my chem pg in December, I charted and am pretty sure I Oed right away (even a little early for me if I remember correctly). I didn't have to worry about abstaining/preventing, though, because my dh was gone again.

knit.gifSAHM to 3 boys and 1 man; 22 jammin.gif, 9REPlaySkateboard04HL.gif, 5 FIREdevil.gifand now 1 year oldtoddler.gif!

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