The September "Whatever" Thread - Page 7 - Mothering Forums
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#181 of 437 Old 09-10-2010, 11:36 PM
 
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Nina ~ That's so interesting that your hcg is still 13.5. How long has it been since you m/ced? My hcg was 12 on the day I started bleeding. I did test until they weren't + anymore but it only took 2 days, I think.
I spotted on 8/25, hcg ~9000, m/c 8/26, 8/27 hcg ~2000, 13 days later hcg 13.5. Midwife told me if I got pregnant again, we'd just watch the values go up, otherwise we should see them go to <5 soon. I was 8 weeks pg when I m/c.

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#182 of 437 Old 09-11-2010, 08:31 AM - Thread Starter
 
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So - another annoying thing. I can't stand when ppl say to "relax and it'll happen". I've decided this is my least favorite "encouragement" from anyone who learns we're working on #2. I never knew how maddening that was to hear until I heard it for myself. I was chatting w/a coworker about it today, just saying I was hoping it would happen soon, and she goes, "Well, are you stressing about it? Just relax and it'll happen!"
I'm going to annoy you some more then. I agree that it is very annoying and sometimes very upsetting to hear when you are hoping to get pg and it's not happening as fast as you'd like. However, I believe there is a lot of truth and wisdom in that statement. I've seen it happen time and time again. The obvious is the couple that finally gives up on having a bio child and decides to adopt and then gets pg either during the adoption process or sometime right after getting their child.

Stress does create the excess production of hormones (cortisol is one) that are not good for general health and do possibly interfere with fertility. If I remember what I've read, it doesn't take much stress for the body to start producing excess cortisol.

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#183 of 437 Old 09-11-2010, 01:12 PM
 
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I've never liked FRER because Answer Early costs less, is made by the same company, and is very, very sensitive, so take this FWIW. FRER have changed. They now test for a different variant of the hcg hormone, which is supposedly why they can be used even earlier than before. The problem is that now they are also prone to false +, especially in older women. I don't know all the details about how and why they are prone to false + but, as far as I know, they are the only test that can give a true false + rather than just an evap that someone may mistake for a +. I will not be using them ever again. I'll stick with AEs if I need a big fancy test.
Very interesting. I had heard about the new FRER causing false positives, but didn't think much of it I guess. See, it's funny you say that Answer works just as well because Answer never gave me a positive when my FRER's did! Same day and everything. So I've always said no to answer and yes to FRER. However, I probably won't use FRER anymore now that they have changed. I've heard people swear by Equate brand....but that's not an early tester is it?

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Ok, I give. I'm ready to admit that systematic early testing may not be such a good idea. Not that I'm going to give it up. I don't have that much willpower. It never used to get to me like this either. I can't stand it anymore when it looks like there might be a line there but I'm just not sure and I have to wait another freakin' day! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!

I think my eyes play tricks on me. Because I know where the line is supposed to be, if I look long and hard enough I can make one appear. Then I look away and glance back and it's not there. Look away and glance back again and there it is but if I look too long it disappears. So I set it down and as I'm setting it down I'm sure I see a line again.

I'm going to try to take my mind off of it by doing some yarn stalking. A dyer is going to put a colorway I requested up for sale today. I sure hope I can get some before it's all gone. (Oh, and shhhhh...don't tell my dh.)
I do that ALL the time. It's like a game. "Oh look! There it is. There it isn't. There it is.." lol

Oh and I have some yarn for sale. *ahem*

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I get so crazed I pull them out of the trash, like,"Wait, lemme just look one more time..."

Sigh, it's nice being zen this cycle!

The only thing I'm stressing about is I still have this UTI. I'm going to call the dr today b/c it's been almost a week, and while the ACV helps, it's not kicking it. I'm so run down fighting this pain. I think even taking abx at this point will be easier on my body then all these natural remedies and the stress it's causing me. What do you guys think?
I think you should probably get abx. Just be sure and take probiotics while taking them. At least you've given it a good try!

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So...I went and rechecked my hpts. There is definitely a line on the $ Store test. Now the question is whether or not it's an evap. I'm leaning toward not since I really thought I might have seen a line within the time limit. I would expect it to get darker and more obvious after drying since that's what all my other hpts have done. I've never been tricked by an evap before. I picked up some AEs to try to confirm. I'm trying to wait a couple more hours before using one.

Oh, and I remember my justification for testing so early. I'm supposed to call the OB as soon as I find out I'm pg. I figure the sooner the better, right?
I don't want to be Debbie Downer, but I always get false positives (or evaps)
on Dollar Tree tests. I've sworn off them in the worst way because I always get this light pink line....almost every time I've taken them, even when I am definitely not pregnant. I've heard of that happening a lot.


AFM: My temp jumped up this morning, but I'm guessing it's because of the horrible night of sleep I had. 19 month old was all over me, rolling to and fro, nursing, kicking, slapping. http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/2be681

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#184 of 437 Old 09-11-2010, 01:51 PM
 
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hiya lovelies! i have been away at my first week back at school. i'm a waldorf teacher and i have a new first grade class this year. i was not teaching last year, and so this is a big huge transition for me to be back in the classroom and teaching in our new school (we moved last year).

i just read quickly through all the days of posts i had missed! i love how this thread is so talkative ...

i'm on cd12, still dry/teensy bit sticky last night, so bd without protection. seems my cycles have shifted to a later O. i did a liver cleanse back in june, and since then (maybe just a coincidence) i've been O-ing around cd16 (my usual O was 12-14). i also usually have an 11 day lp, but if ff was correct last month, it was 10 days. i hope that is not a trend. 10 days is pretty short, right? too short?

anyway, sorry no replies to all individual posts i read, but i'm thinking of each of you and following with interest.

love and xoxo

~Karenchicken3.gifso happy to be mothering my four... DS ('94), DS ('94), DD ('00), and DS -- June 8, 2011, our UC baby!

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#185 of 437 Old 09-11-2010, 01:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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See, it's funny you say that Answer works just as well because Answer never gave me a positive when my FRER's did! Same day and everything. So I've always said no to answer and yes to FRER. However, I probably won't use FRER anymore now that they have changed. I've heard people swear by Equate brand....but that's not an early tester is it?
FRER are now more sensitive than AE. It's just the false + thing that freaks me out, especially since I'm in the "older women" category that would be more prone to get them.

I've never even seen the Equate much less used them so I don't know if they are advertised as an early test. They do claim to be sensitive to 25 mIU, which is the same as all the other early tests sold in stores except FRER. Here is a list of many tests and their official sensitivities.

I was looking at the FF hpt analysis and Equate has the 2nd highest percentage of first + at or before 9dpo for tests posted in the FF hpt gallery, higher than FRER. I assume that's at least partially because it's cheaper so used early more often but that does show that it is very sensitive. ICs had the highest percentage of bfp then. DTs come in 3rd and AE comes in 4th.

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I don't want to be Debbie Downer, but I always get false positives (or evaps)
on Dollar Tree tests. I've sworn off them in the worst way because I always get this light pink line....almost every time I've taken them, even when I am definitely not pregnant. I've heard of that happening a lot.
I guess I didn't post my results from this morning. The IC had an evap and the DT was BFN. I'm just going to consider them all BFN at this point. If that line yesterday was something, it would have been at least a little darker today.

I know lots of people say they get evaps, but to be completely honest, I kind of thought they just didn't know how to read the tests or had a chem pg and didn't want to acknowledge it. I have used A LOT over the years and have never seen an evap before on any pink dye test.

I threw all my tests out so now I won't keep looking at them over and over. I'm so ready for this cycle to be over. I know I'm not pg and I need to get into some things with my dh.

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#186 of 437 Old 09-11-2010, 05:50 PM
 
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I threw all my tests out so now I won't keep looking at them over and over. I'm so ready for this cycle to be over. I know I'm not pg and I need to get into some things with my dh.
I know you guys have some issues to work out. I hope you can reach a compromise. Sorry for the bfns.

And I know stress is no good -- but I feel like ppl think I'm an idiot when they say it to me. It's like, I know that. Thanks. Really that's why it's annoying. Not b/c its not true, but b/c it IS true and I know it already!! LOL!

I think I might be kicking this UTI naturally anyway! I woke up today in no pain and have had very little discomfort all day. Even throughout work! So, hopefully I won't need the abx after all!

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#187 of 437 Old 09-11-2010, 06:40 PM
 
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I think I might be kicking this UTI naturally anyway! I woke up today in no pain and have had very little discomfort all day. Even throughout work! So, hopefully I won't need the abx after all!
YAYYYYY!!

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#188 of 437 Old 09-11-2010, 06:44 PM
 
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I think I might be kicking this UTI naturally anyway! I woke up today in no pain and have had very little discomfort all day. Even throughout work! So, hopefully I won't need the abx after all!
not to be an alarmist, just a word of caution...

Sometime you stop having pain if the infection moves into your kidneys. Just be really cautious if you start to have any aching in your lower back.

Hopefully you were able to flush it out
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#189 of 437 Old 09-11-2010, 07:08 PM
 
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not to be an alarmist, just a word of caution...

Sometime you stop having pain if the infection moves into your kidneys. Just be really cautious if you start to have any aching in your lower back.

Hopefully you were able to flush it out
Thanks for this. I know. I actually feel really good, still doing all the same stuff to keep it at bay, and no pain anywhere else. We'll see.

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#190 of 437 Old 09-11-2010, 08:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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And I know stress is no good -- but I feel like ppl think I'm an idiot when they say it to me. It's like, I know that. Thanks. Really that's why it's annoying. Not b/c its not true, but b/c it IS true and I know it already!! LOL!

I think I might be kicking this UTI naturally anyway! I woke up today in no pain and have had very little discomfort all day. Even throughout work! So, hopefully I won't need the abx after all!
I think that's annoying for me because I don't like it when virtual strangers act like they think they know more than me about myself.

Glad you are feeling better. I've read that it takes a week for the immune system to fully kick in so maybe that's what has happened.

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#191 of 437 Old 09-11-2010, 11:08 PM
 
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Ladies, I have a question.

In the fairly unlikely event that the sperm currently inside my womb survive until ovulation, I want to know if it would be bad to go in a hot tub?

~Karenchicken3.gifso happy to be mothering my four... DS ('94), DS ('94), DD ('00), and DS -- June 8, 2011, our UC baby!

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#192 of 437 Old 09-12-2010, 09:18 AM
 
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I think the thing w/hot tubs is it raises your internal temperature.

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There's no evidence to suggest that heat affects a woman's eggs, but we do know that hot tubs and saunas aren't recommended during pregnancy. Some studies show that raising your body temperature during early pregnancy increases the risk of birth defects, and a 2003 study found that women who used hot tubs early in pregnancy were twice as likely to miscarry. If you really want to play it safe, skip the hot tub for now or limit visits to the weeks just prior to ovulation.

http://www.babycenter.com/404_should...pre_1336309.bc

AFM - still no pain this am! wa-HOOOO!
I think I'll still keep my dr appt just to make sure it's gone and maybe just get a check up. Why not?

Still having a bit of bloody nose, heartburn something awful multiple times a day from non-spicy things, and NO taste for alcohol. I usually have a drink 2-3 times a week and have never felt the need to not drink during any 2ww. But this time for some reason the thought of wine or beer makes my throat close up. So weird.

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#193 of 437 Old 09-12-2010, 11:12 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Ladies, I have a question.

In the fairly unlikely event that the sperm currently inside my womb survive until ovulation, I want to know if it would be bad to go in a hot tub?
Heat can also be very damaging to sperm so I'd probably pass on the hot tub, too.

AFM, my temps suck. I think I'm getting a cold. My temps have been low probably because my nose is stuffed up and I've been sleeping with my mouth open. So now I know that when I sleep with my mouth open, my temps are a lot lower. I'm almost certain I am not pg this cycle. Now I need to figure out when to stop the progesterone.

Do I go ahead and stop when my normal lp is up, 12dpo, or should I wait until 14dpo just to be safe? If I wait, it will push my O for next cycle back. A couple of days wouldn't usually be a big deal except that I'm expected to O around the 1st or 2nd of October and dh is leaving for 2 weeks on the 29th. Those 2 days could be critical. I was reading the FF first analysis. It says if you get a before 11dpo, the chances of getting a later are still good. But if you get a at 11dpo, the chances of getting a later is very unlikely.

DH and I talked again last night. At the end of it he sort of begrudgingly agreed to have another baby. He said something along the lines of, if he wanted to save our marriage, he guessed he'd have to do that. Then he said, "I guess we'll have to figure out how to get you pg." Seriously?! As if we don't already know how to do that? That, of course, did not make me happy. I don't want him to agree to it and then be resentful about it. He says he'll figure out a way to get over it but I don't want that, either. I want him to want to do it.

He's supposed to go to the counseling center on base Monday to schedule us for some marriage counseling. That's been something I've been asking him to do for years before things ever got this bad just because I wanted us to see if we could make our relationship even better. It makes me really sad that it took me essentially saying I would leave to finally get him to do something. In the meantime, I might go to my dad's next weekend by myself so I can talk things over with him. I also just feel like I need to get away from everyone and everything for a little bit. Is it weird that the thought of leaving my kids for only 2 days makes me really sad? I would take them except that I want to be able to really talk to my dad about everything.

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#194 of 437 Old 09-12-2010, 01:14 PM
 
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MW ~ i know i've just met you here recently... but i feel for you, and i'm so sorry you are having to go through this. you and your dh. it is good that you were able to communicate how much this means to you, in terms that he could finally understand. it sucks that it has to come to that. and of course you don't want him to resent you or the child coming. of course you want him to change his mind and actually want the child. before it comes. it sounds really good that you will go to the marriage counseling. i hope it helps the communication to stay open and more clear. sleep also helps bring clarity. and i hope that over the next few days, and nights, you both will come closer together. i don't know if your dh is like mine, but i've had the experience of him having big reactions and then settling quickly into reason and perspective.

thanks for the info on the hot tub, mw and babycakes. i read recently in tcoyf that men trying to conceive should avoid hot tubs because the heat increase can damage the sperm. that's what made me wonder and question going myself, seeing that there may be sperm in there...

i had a curious thing happen this morning. when i wiped after going pee, i saw a big glob of what looked like eggwhite this after being completely dry two days ago (friday). dh and i bd on friday eve, so i didn't note cm yesterday since there was likely semen present. but this morning... is it possible the eggwhite-looking substance was still leftover semen?? should i chart it as eggwhite? i'm freaking out a little because technically we are tta and i thought i was dry and not near O on friday. could i have jumped to eggwhite so quickly?

chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/27628e in case you're interested.


xoxo

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#195 of 437 Old 09-12-2010, 02:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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First, thank you for your kind words.

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thanks for the info on the hot tub, mw and babycakes. i read recently in tcoyf that men trying to conceive should avoid hot tubs because the heat increase can damage the sperm. that's what made me wonder and question going myself, seeing that there may be sperm in there...
I think sperm is probably more vulnerable in the man since it is essentially stored outside the body whereas in the female it is inside the body. Make sense? That's why a normal hot shower or bath would be ok for you but a hot tub with more extreme heat might be dangerous.

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i had a curious thing happen this morning. when i wiped after going pee, i saw a big glob of what looked like eggwhite this after being completely dry two days ago (friday). dh and i bd on friday eve, so i didn't note cm yesterday since there was likely semen present. but this morning... is it possible the eggwhite-looking substance was still leftover semen?? should i chart it as eggwhite? i'm freaking out a little because technically we are tta and i thought i was dry and not near O on friday. could i have jumped to eggwhite so quickly?
I doubt it's leftover semen from 2 days ago. I think semen is pretty much gone within a day. Was it stretchy? Semen is usually not stretchy. I've also read it described as foamy whereas ewcf is not.

It's possible that semen from yesterday may have obscured any CF that you had then. It's also possible that you had CF internally that didn't make it's way out until this gob.

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#196 of 437 Old 09-12-2010, 03:31 PM
 
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Sorry guys, I've been away camping this weekend, so I'm pretty behind. No news here obviously, I'm just waiting until next week. I didn't temp while I was gone, but I think I'm going to temp for the next two or three days just to see where it's at aagin, and then stop again. I feel like I want another 'baseline' as to where they're sitting right now mid LP.

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I can't stand when ppl say to "relax and it'll happen".
Totally understood. I also get the "Well you're young...." But youth is totally a subjective thing. I am years older than I wanted to be with my first, so hearing that I'm "young" doesn't help. It doesn't erase the years I've spent childless. And I mean I do agree with the relaxation and stress-- but it seems like -most- people that throw this saying at you, aren't saying it in a truly caring about you and not wanting you to worry, they're saying it in a flippant kind of way. As if it would just be easy as long as you would not think about it, and geeze, why are you worrying.

DH and I aren't telling anyone irl that we're trying. The standard line with family/friends right now is still "If you want to donate to the baby fund, we take cheques". Mostly, I just don't want to deal with constant questions wondering when it'll happen, especially if we don't get pregnant. The only people that know we're open to it, and even trying, are you guys here on MDC. We also talked about not telling anyone for quite a while, probably the 10-12 week mark-- which is 'normal' and recommended, but doesn't seem to be what most people do anymore. All my SIL's have spread the world to everyone at 4 weeks or even before.

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#197 of 437 Old 09-12-2010, 03:46 PM
 
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Mostly, I just don't want to deal with constant questions wondering when it'll happen, especially if we don't get pregnant. The only people that know we're open to it, and even trying, are you guys here on MDC. We also talked about not telling anyone for quite a while, probably the 10-12 week mark-- which is 'normal' and recommended, but doesn't seem to be what most people do anymore. All my SIL's have spread the world to everyone at 4 weeks or even before.
The only person I'm *really* going to tell is my BFF. Work is an issue. I work closely w/three girls in a small spa. I know how I am the first few weeks w/nausea. I think I could keep it on the DL for a little while, maybe a month or so, but I'm not sure. I'm going to play it by ear and see how it goes. It won't be an "announcement" but it might slip out or I might have to tell if I'm not feeling well.

My first pg we waited till 9 weeks to tell anyone and family, and I didn't tell work until I was 12 weeks (to the day) but that was my old office job and it was easier to hide it.

Sigh. Is it Wed yet?

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#198 of 437 Old 09-12-2010, 03:55 PM
 
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haha Sorry, I missed, is Wednesday test day? I'm still feeling a little slow after getting back into the city again

I'm hoping to hold off telling work as long as possible, but I don't know how that'll go, as I wear a uniform... one that is very high waisted, and I don't know how long it'll take before I can't do it up anymore. But I ideally would love to wait until that 12 week mark, just since I'm so new, and want to play it off more as an 'accident'. Family might actually end up being easier to wait for, since we don't see them as often and I can dress to hide it when we do. I guess we'll see.

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#199 of 437 Old 09-12-2010, 04:00 PM
 
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Wed is the earliest I will test. I've been doing good up till now, not even really thinking about it. But honestly, I'm pretty much convinced I'm pg at this point, so I really just want the proof.

Or, I want to go back to spin class b/c over the summer I've gained about 5-7 lbs. I had an epiphany yesterday that the reason I've gained weight is b/c Nora is basically weaned. Rude awakening. My diet hasn't changed one bit but I gained basically a pants size.

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#200 of 437 Old 09-12-2010, 04:04 PM
 
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I think sperm is probably more vulnerable in the man since it is essentially stored outside the body whereas in the female it is inside the body. Make sense? That's why a normal hot shower or bath would be ok for you but a hot tub with more extreme heat might be dangerous.
yeah, totally.

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I doubt it's leftover semen from 2 days ago. I think semen is pretty much gone within a day. Was it stretchy? Semen is usually not stretchy. I've also read it described as foamy whereas ewcf is not.

It's possible that semen from yesterday may have obscured any CF that you had then. It's also possible that you had CF internally that didn't make it's way out until this gob.
it was stretchy, and definitely eggy. not foamy at all. i'm taking deep breaths. i was so proud of myself for finally reading tcoyf and going more by cm than what day of my cycle it was. especially since the last few have been later O. i was certain of the dryness, but didn't check my cervix. just what i could feel when i wiped and checked with my fingers at the entry.

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DH and I aren't telling anyone irl that we're trying. The standard line with family/friends right now is still "If you want to donate to the baby fund, we take cheques". Mostly, I just don't want to deal with constant questions wondering when it'll happen, especially if we don't get pregnant. The only people that know we're open to it, and even trying, are you guys here on MDC. We also talked about not telling anyone for quite a while, probably the 10-12 week mark-- which is 'normal' and recommended, but doesn't seem to be what most people do anymore. All my SIL's have spread the world to everyone at 4 weeks or even before.
i hope you get your pg soon! i will tell my immediate family right away. i couldn't keep it from my kids. my last pg i lost at 12 weeks. by then many people knew. my colleagues, my students and their parents...this time, though, i won't tell the news at work since i just started and i don't feel intimate enough to share with everyone. i will wait until 12 weeks.

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#201 of 437 Old 09-12-2010, 04:17 PM
 
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MW that sounds like an overall crappy situation, but I am glad you are starting to get somewhere, as far as counseling and so forth. I hope it all works out!

Hot tubs - ok...I know they are not rec. in pregnancy but I have a huge problem with this. I love hot tubs. Last time I was pregnant, I didn't have access to any except at my parents' house, so I just had them turn it down to 100 or so whenever I came over so I could go in. This time, there's a hot tub in our apartment building, and so of course it's set to 104 or whatever and can't be changed. I wish there was more info on "how much" exactly is dangerous...can I go in up to my waist or so and not raise my body temp too much? Can I put just my legs in? Can I go completely in for a limited time? How long - 5 minutes? 3? 10? I don't know if I can give up the hot tub altogether. I know, nobody knows the answer to this, so I'll probably just have to do what I feel comfortable with. Not sure what that is yet.

As for telling people, last time we told our parents and sisters at 7 weeks and everybody else around 12 weeks. I thought waiting that long was ridiculous and this time I think I will just tell whoever cares as soon as I know. Of course, I've never had a miscarriage so I don't know how I would feel about it if I did...isn't that the rationale for waiting to tell people? So you don't have to untell? Is there a big stigma related to miscarriages or what? I mean, do people tell you hurtful things if you tell them that you lost that baby? Just wondering why people wait so long.

Today confirms O - I got crosshairs. Chart.

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#202 of 437 Old 09-12-2010, 04:37 PM
 
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I know for us, I just want the time to enjoy it by ourselves. I have five nieces, all on my husbands side, but both sides of our family are fairly mainstream, and we know that a lot of the things we want/believe in, are going to be called into question. I want a while to enjoy the pregnancy before feeling like we're being called under fire. Kind of a honeymoon period if you will.

As for hot tubs- we have one in our backyard, and it sits normally around 101-102, 104 is much too hot for me. I plan on using it for the birth, by just turning it down, so I figure that what we'll do during pregnancy. I'm not very worried about having it at say 99 and taking a 10 minute soak.

I keep going back and forth of whether I 'know' I'm pregnant. It's weird because a fair number of people say they 'just knew', and I haven't felt anything like that. i think it's just a combination of hopefullness and my logical brain going "well hey, we got two bd in during the fertile time, and the second one there was almost nothing that slipped back out, which means it all stayed where it should... so that means I should be pregnant, right?" And the hard part is reminding myself that that means good chances, but not necessarily a pregnancy.

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#203 of 437 Old 09-12-2010, 07:08 PM
 
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I keep going back and forth of whether I 'know' I'm pregnant. It's weird because a fair number of people say they 'just knew', and I haven't felt anything like that. i think it's just a combination of hopefullness and my logical brain going "well hey, we got two bd in during the fertile time, and the second one there was almost nothing that slipped back out, which means it all stayed where it should... so that means I should be pregnant, right?" And the hard part is reminding myself that that means good chances, but not necessarily a pregnancy.
FX'ed for you!!

FWIW I have a really weird feeling this cycle. We'll see I guess in a few days.

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#204 of 437 Old 09-13-2010, 12:52 AM
 
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JJ, I hoped I would just "know" but I didn't really, I was hopful because my temp was stll up and my boobs hadn't deflated (LOL, I know, but that is usually what happened right before AF) so I was hopeful when I tested, but not certain.

MW, glad you and your DH seem to be headed in a better direction.

Glad you have seemed to hve kicked the UTI on your own- that is good news indeed!

DH and I tend to avoid hot tubs - especially public ones - as much for the heat as the chemicals some are cleaned with. I miss them though, so relaxing!

AF has finally left the building, but we are avoiding this cycle, and maybe next (depends on how long this one lasts) and then on to really "whatevering" in November.

that whole relax thing is annoying, as is youth, but both I think are annoying as there is a kernel of truth in them. I know it will happen when it is meant to happen, and not a moment sooner.

On an off topic - DS has cut 2 teeth and has 2 more on their way through. it has been a rough week.

- here's to a few September grads to be announced soon, I hope!

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#205 of 437 Old 09-13-2010, 05:32 AM
 
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I`ve tested the last two mornings, 8 & 9 dpo i think. Maybe 7 & 8.
Not even a hint of a line. But I still have a chance i guess.
I`m in the middle of somehow changing my work situation, and the timing would just be wonderful if I`m pregnant this month. Because then I can push the uncomfortable stuff in front of me for å while...
I hope, hope, hope to have a positive one before this week is up.

Proud Norwegian mother of four intact boys, expecting a little baby May 2011!
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#206 of 437 Old 09-13-2010, 10:13 AM - Thread Starter
 
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After my first couple of m/cs, I pretty much knew I when I was pg again. I don't think it was an actual feeling of being pg. I think it was more that I fully expected to be pg because I seemed to always get pg. KWIM? Interestingly, I did know when a pg wasn't going to stick. Right before my first m/c, I had a really awful, bloody dream. It was so bizarre. I was running from vampires and bleeding profusely.

With my 11w m/c last year, I knew something was wrong. I emotionally freaked out right before the 8th week and decided to go to my mom's, hoping she would take care of me. I felt so sick and drained the entire time I was there (and my mom wasn't very nice or helpful at all). I made an early appointment with my MW for as soon as I got back home. That was in the 9th week. We didn't hear a heartbeat. No biggie, really, because it was so early but I had a sense for at least a week that something was wrong. I called an OB right away and got in for an u/s. Sure enough, there was a baby measuring just about 8w but no cardiac activity.

Sorry for being a downer. I don't mean to. I just think it's amazing how our bodies can send us signals through chemicals to prepare us for what is to come.

Katrina ~ I love to take hot, hot baths. I mean so hot that when I get out my skin that was submerged is hot pink. I have no idea what the temperature is but I try to avoid doing that during the 2ww, which is usually when I really want to take one. Hmm...all those years we were TTC before ds2 I used to take those hot baths during the 2ww. My dh would always notice when I was feeling run down and crampy and get my bath ready for me.

Aurora ~ Way too early to expect a . According to a FF study, a isn't definitive until after 12dpo, maybe.

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#207 of 437 Old 09-13-2010, 12:38 PM
 
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akind-- here's hoping the next two months go very quickly for you! It can seem like forever once the end is in sight.

Aurora-- As MW said, don't give up hope yet! There's still a chance!

MW-- Oh I totally get it, and I think in some way because I know there are people who have such strong feelings and they just KNOW, that because I dont, my mind automatically thinks it must mean I'm not pregnant. Which really, isn't rational, but then again, who is at this point

On that note, I'm 8dpo, no new symptoms or thoughts or anything. I temped this morning, and it was a tad higher than my last temp on 4dpo, but obviously that doesn't really say anything. I stuffed myself with junk food this weekend while camping, so I'm still feeling kind of rotten, we'll see what I feel like once it wears off.

We're up to about 4 people who are possibly in for this month, right?

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#208 of 437 Old 09-13-2010, 12:55 PM - Thread Starter
 
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MW-- Oh I totally get it, and I think in some way because I know there are people who have such strong feelings and they just KNOW, that because I dont, my mind automatically thinks it must mean I'm not pregnant. Which really, isn't rational, but then again, who is at this point
I think it's easy, though, to go back after the fact and say you knew you were pg when, really, you were just very hopeful. KWIM? I think it also depends on how far along someone was before they knew. Are we talking about people who knew once they realized AF was late or are we talking about people who knew they were say 8-10dpo and just knew? With my 1st pg I didn't know until I was 10-12 weeks along even though I knew something was wrong.

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We're up to about 4 people who are possibly in for this month, right?
If you are counting me, I'm out. 11dpo today and another . is due Wednesday or Thursday. Yeah, I know it's still early for most people but it's late for me. Whenever I have gotten a first late like this it's been a chem pg.

I hope this doesn't make me sound totally crazy but now that dh has said he'd TTC if that is the only way to save our marriage, I'm not sure I want to have another baby. I know I don't want to TTC. I tried to explain that to him but he doesn't seem to get it. I think that him controlling the situation and leaving me with no choice was making me feel desperate.

Can I ask you guys a question since you all sort of "know" me? Is there really something wrong with me for wanting so much to not prevent? Whenever I bring this up with anyone else, I get comments about how I need to explore why this is so important to me. I've been told I need to get therapy to get to the root of my supposed "need" for another baby. The thing is that I don't need another baby. What I need is the possibility of another baby. Why is that so hard for others to understand? Maybe because they haven't had fertility/RPL issues so to them not preventing is essentially the same as TTC? That does not apply to us. To put it in perspective, in the 10 years that we have not used any bc we have managed to have only 2 children. I bet that's far less than other couples with normal fertility. Look at the Duggar's.

My therapist said to me that she thinks I want another baby to fill the void of not feeling loved by my dh. I think that's ridiculous. If I feel unloved by my dh and I have another baby that he does not want, I'll just feel even more alone and unloved. KWIM? I'm not that stupid. I'm so tired of having my desires discounted or minimized. Why must there be some neurosis driving what I want? Can't a normal, healthy person feel the way I do?

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#209 of 437 Old 09-13-2010, 01:57 PM
 
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Well of course you don't want to have another baby with him saying that. I wouldn't want to either. It's like he's giving in and doesn't really want another baby, just doing it so that you won't leave. That's just not a good reason to bring another child into the world. It would leave a funny taste in my mouth too.

I don't think there's anything *wrong* w/you. I think you and your DH have a ton of issues to work out, but unfortunately you don't have the luxury of taking a few years to iron out your problems before ttc again. Maybe you are looking for someone to love and to love you unconditionally and to fill some void - even if it sounds ridiculous to your conscious mind. Part of having a baby is having someone who needs you no matter what, someone that you can 100% love and smother and they won't mind. It's definitely something to think about and talk about.

It might be hard for ppl to understand that you just want to stop preventing. That if it happens, wonderful, but you need that option open. That isn't easy for most people w/no problems to understand. B/c they see that as wanting to be just like Michelle Duggar, welcoming as many babies as you possibly can (even though for you, its a totally different situation).

Just know we're here for you, if you need to talk some more. Feel free to pm me if you want to. I'm always around.



AFM - Going to the dr this evening. I ran on the treadmill yesterday and am sore everywhere, but am having some nagging lower back pain and am worried about a kidney infection. Why can't anything ever just be easy? Can't I get just one friggin' break?? I'm so upset and just really emotional about this. I am so mad.

Carrie SAHM to Nora Caitlyn (5) and Finnley Dax (2) homebirthing, breastfeeding, babywearing, intactivist, doula mama!         
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#210 of 437 Old 09-13-2010, 02:16 PM
 
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MarineWife, I think our feelings about this is a bit the same.
I Have 4, and in my country that is many children. I know another pregnancy would bring up a bunch of questions from people who just can`t understand.
And I have a hard time explaining. So many tell me that "after the second one-third one- I felt I was done" But I`ve never felt that. I would love to, but it just has not happened.
I LOVE being pregnant, I LOVE the life with a baby. But here it`s not very common to be a SAHM. Most women go back to work once their babies turn 1yo. I have uasually been able to stay at home a little longer.
But still i LOVE that peaceful year at home, doing household chores, being a full-time mom. Maybe I miss the love from my man because he is gone so much of the time to work and that is also a factor. I just don`t know...

Well, maybe I have some mild symptoms here, or maybe I just think so because I want to be pregnant.
Started yesterday, I was soooo tired. Fell asleep in the middle of the day, and was still tired when I went to bed early. Tired today as well. And more c. fluids, but don`t remember if I use to have that this stage in my cycle.

I don`t think I`m pregnant. My luck has not been with me today, so why should I be lucky this one time when the possibilities actually are there?

Proud Norwegian mother of four intact boys, expecting a little baby May 2011!
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