Unwanted pregnancy..feeling guilty - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 19 Old 03-26-2004, 04:55 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm just hoping for some support, here. I have four children now, the youngest being 8 months. I have been practicing ecological breastfeeding and AF has not returned yet. My other children are 8, 3, and 2. I have really been struggling with stress as a parent and think most days I am not a good mother and can't keep it together. In the last two weeks I felt a little different, like there was some sort of shift in my body. So when I started to get a bit of cramping I thought I might be ovulating. DH and I have been using condoms since, and I know that during that time I also had dicharge that was consistent with ovulation. About three days prior to this we did not have intercourse. It's only been a week but I've been having dizzy spells and I am really tired lately. Not really nauseated but it would be too early for a pregnany test. If I am pregnant I am so sad, I wanted to keep my youngest to myself for a while longer. We are already struggling financially and my family worries that we have too many kids already. No one knows about this except for my DH. Are there any other hormonal circumstances that could cause the dizzyness and tiredness? AF coming, maybe??? I'm feeling guilty for my feelings as I know we were talking about doing something permanent for birth control, but now that I may be pregnant I think I didn't watch closely enough so it's my fault, and also feeling guilty that I'm not more happy if I am pregnant. I'm Christian so I should be veiwing this possibility as a gift from God. How will I ever handle another child?

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#2 of 19 Old 03-26-2004, 05:17 PM
 
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It could be that you are going to resume your cycle. I know that some of the symtoms of AF are similiar to pregnancy.
I am sort of in the same postion as you only my youngest is 33mths and I only have two. Anyway, my dh and I slipped up last week and didn't use BC and I'm pretty sure I ovulated the next day. So I'm waiting to see if I'm preg too and it is also too early for me to test. I have been feeling a little off but maybe it'd PMS or allergies??????
I know my family will NOT be happy if I'm pregnant. We are really struggling finacially right now, but we are starting to get back on our feet.
I keep going back and forth between being excited to feeling like it would be be bad if I was pregnant.
I'm wishing you the best , no matter what that is. Please don't feel guilty your feelings are very understandable!

OUR DAUGHTERS ARE PROTECTED SHOULDN'T OUR SONS BE TOO! :
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#3 of 19 Old 03-26-2004, 05:25 PM
 
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If you view this possibility as a "gift from God", then that is where you will get the strength to handle things- from God. (And a little support from your friends here at MDC- right?)

Also, being dehydrated can make you feel dizzy and tired.

((hugs))
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#4 of 19 Old 03-26-2004, 06:33 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Well when I got up after posting this message I nearly passed out. Two hours later (just now) I got my period! Well, I've never had that happen to me for AF before! Needless to say I am very relieved, and I noticed it about ten minutes after praying about it. Thank you God! If I should ever get pregnant in the future, I'd like at least for my youngest to be 3 years old. And I know if I was pg now I'd have to somehow make it ok with me so as not to effect the unborn baby negatively. But I'm quite sure we're done. We'll have to be extra careful now.

Shecoby:

How many kids do you have? Keep us posted when you know alittle more. I hope everything works out for you either way. Thank you both for your replies, I love the support I get here at MDC.

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#5 of 19 Old 03-31-2004, 06:07 PM
 
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Melissa-- After my first m/c y O symptoms were; tiredness, nausea to the point of vomiting, dizzy spells, and cramping. I thought every month I waspg. But I wasn't. Those were just my "signs".

I'm hoping I don't experience the same this time around!!

Single Mom to 2 amazing little men. T(7) and B(5)
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#6 of 19 Old 04-01-2004, 01:23 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Megan;

are you talking about your first post-pregnancy cycle? How long did it last? I'm just at the end of AF and I'm still very light-headed. I never had this after my other three kids.

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#7 of 19 Old 04-01-2004, 01:52 AM
 
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Every cycle was like that. Every time I would ovulate it would all start over again!

It usually lasted till af was over. Then it subsided. Sometimes as soon as af would start most of it would go away.

I hope you feel better soon!

Single Mom to 2 amazing little men. T(7) and B(5)
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#8 of 19 Old 04-01-2004, 02:39 AM
 
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Melissa,

With four children of course you're tired and getting dizzy! You probably are exerting way more energy than you are taking in right now. I only have one child and I forget to take care of myself half the time.

Don't feel guilty about being freaked out at the idea of another child (and so soon after your baby too!) I think it is totally normal. I get that way when I hear about other mom's with kids the age of my dd who are pregnant with their second! Just give yourself plenty of leeway to feel anything at all, I'm sure you are a great mom and probably just need a little time off.

Take care of yourself.

A little bit grasshopper a little bit ant   energy.gifom.gif

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#9 of 19 Old 04-01-2004, 03:32 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Megan, could you clarify? Do you still get this during your cycles? Was it just while you wer BF? You used the past tense "was" so I'm assuming you no longer have these symptoms. When did they stop, if they did? Wouldn't those symptoms mean our hormones are way out of whack???

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#10 of 19 Old 04-01-2004, 03:33 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Megan, did I miss something? Are you PG now?

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#11 of 19 Old 04-01-2004, 07:12 PM
 
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I certainly hope I'mnot pregnant! No, i have a 9 week old so i'm just getting back into the swing of things. I believe I'm about 3dpo right now. I had some dizzy spells a couple days ago.

It does not necessarily mean your hormones are out of whack. Some women have these things every month. Ther eis really nothing "odd" about the symptoms...except maybe because you've never expereinced them before.

Every month when I would ovulate from Nov. 2002 (my first m/c) till May 2003 (when I got pg) I would have severe dizzy spells, nausea to the point of vomiting, food aversions, tiredness, and cramps. this would last until af started and soemtimes till it was over.

Its like your body resets itself and nothing is the same. Yes, I was still bfing but I got my first ppaf at 6 weeks with Tracy and I didn't have any problems until AFTER my m/c. Then things went screwy.

I'm not sure how things will be this time around but I'm hoping that all will be fine!

Single Mom to 2 amazing little men. T(7) and B(5)
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#12 of 19 Old 04-01-2004, 08:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Megan:
thanks for your insight. I sure hope this does not last. It is very annoying. Maybe I should take some black cohosh, soy, and dongquai? Don't know if it's ok while bf. I wonder why it's bothering me now and never did before. Maybe it's perimenopause? I am almost 30 (yikes!) so it's a possibility that these are signs of menopause coming on???? How old are you?

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#13 of 19 Old 04-02-2004, 10:38 AM
 
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I'm 25. I have hormone issues. I'll explain later... too hard with Bryce in my lap

Single Mom to 2 amazing little men. T(7) and B(5)
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#14 of 19 Old 04-06-2004, 08:42 PM
 
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Posting an update for those who wanted one.
AF came today!!!! I am relieved.

OUR DAUGHTERS ARE PROTECTED SHOULDN'T OUR SONS BE TOO! :
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#15 of 19 Old 04-06-2004, 09:39 PM - Thread Starter
 
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So it's "Whew!" for both of us!
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#16 of 19 Old 04-06-2004, 11:02 PM
 
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I'm ready to "phew" myself. I have anice looking chart..if I were ttc!!

I'm not worried about it though...but its funny...

www.fertilityfriend.com/hone/2127f

Single Mom to 2 amazing little men. T(7) and B(5)
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#17 of 19 Old 04-06-2004, 11:28 PM
 
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wheeeeew indeed!! Although now I'm thinking we (my dh and I) must not be as fertile as we used to be.

OUR DAUGHTERS ARE PROTECTED SHOULDN'T OUR SONS BE TOO! :
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#18 of 19 Old 04-07-2004, 02:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Yep, I'd be panicking if I slipped up one day before ovulation. I don't have ANY problem conceiving! For us the scare means we need to start some sort of BC and be more diligent about it.

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#19 of 19 Old 04-07-2004, 10:13 AM
 
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We always slip up...thats why we have 2 children!

We've even gotten pregnant through a condom and using spermicide! We lost that baby but still....

We are convinced we get pg in the middle of the night while we are both asleep. We are too careful otherwise. No, I take that back With Bryce we were asking for it. We hadn't used protection in 2 months We both hate condoms so it is very very easy to just skip it "once".

Single Mom to 2 amazing little men. T(7) and B(5)
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