Wanting But Waiting 2014 - Page 21 - Mothering Forums

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#601 of 608 Old 12-08-2014, 03:41 PM
 
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Welcome @itybitywity ! My son is 17 months old too. He is feeling too grown up to me sometimes. I feel a little sad, but it is nice to be getting a little more sleep.



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#602 of 608 Old 12-08-2014, 05:53 PM
 
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Originally Posted by typebug View Post
Ah the pre-pregnancy to-do list. This is mine:
  • Physical & Bloodwork
  • PAP smear
  • Start taking pre-natal vitamins
  • Establish a good self-care routine (diet and exercise)
  • Find a good OBGYN or Midwife

We just bought a house and that's making me really feel settled for the first time in probably 20 years. My early career was spent on the road all the time. And then my husband and I were expats abroad and traveled constantly for his work. My son was born overseas and it was all very exciting but the mother in me deep down wanted to nest and I couldn't. As we plan out rooms and I chart out where all the furniture is going I keep pluralizing "kid" to "kids" and reminding hubby to leave space here or there for another bed or partition the closet for new baby things. He grins. He's so ready to do this.

I was reading about some of you waiting for your partners to be ready and I thought a lot about this period in our relationship. I feel like women seek other women for counsel and we process parenting fears differently. Men often miss out on some really important mentorship. Seek out couples with kids who you look up to and spend more time with them. When you don't have children yet you might be hanging out with other folks without kids and possibly hearing a lot of their negative "never want kids" rhetoric which is not very helpful. For us, we had a couple who were almost 10 years our Sr who really took us under their wing and we spent a lot of time with them as they raised their three amazing kids. They both had some very helpful conversations with each of us about how they balanced career and parenting. Now we're all living close by again and our little boy has three older and doting honorary cousins to look up to. It takes a village.
My pre TTC list is very similar. In fact, I'm waiting on Vitex and Prenatals to arrive in the mail. I'm also going to really spend the next year focusing on Natural Health and Wellness which has always been an interest of mine anyways. But now I'm really going to focus on prepping my body to be ready and in optimum health. I'm focusing on limiting caffeine, switching to mostly green tea for now, and removing anything potentially toxic from my diet or beauty regime. Im hoping the Vitex might help with hormonal acne, slightly irregular cycles, and PMS and potentially strengthen my fertility for when we start TTC. Since TTC is 15 months away, do you think it's okay to start Vitex this soon? Also, anyone have any good success to share regarding Vitex?
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#603 of 608 Old 12-09-2014, 01:36 PM
 
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Vitex reaches optimum effectiveness after taking it for several months so I think it's ok to start early. I took it for a while, probably a year or so, and it did change my cycle, but I did not have success with it. I never had irregular cycles though.



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#604 of 608 Old 12-11-2014, 12:06 AM
 
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@pokeyac , sleep? What is this sleep thing you speak of? I think I might like it.

So DH and I finally had a chance to sit down and talk baby tonight after the kids were in bed. He was kind of surprised that I wanted to TTC right away, since we had previously agreed to wait until summer. He listened to my concerns though, and explained his. It was a really good conversation. We didn't really come to a decision yet, he wants to think about it more before hand and we probably have at least a week before we need to decide for this cycle. I put the responsibility for TTA in his hands for the time being though. Went over my chart with him so he knows when I'm likely to be fertile and said its his choice if we use a condom or not.

I feel much calmer just having talked this over with him. (and cried a bit) I always feel better when we tackle things as a team. He reassured me that it's not now or never, it's now or in a few months. And even if I continue getting sicker in the meantime (which nobody wants) I will likely feel better once I'm pregnant again. So...whew. At least I'm not thinking myself in circles freaking out anymore. It also helped that I talked to my midwife and layed out a baby budget - it might be tight but we could afford to have a baby now.

As others have been posting their pre-TTC to do lists, I'll chime in with mine;
- get a bigger car (ours only fits two in back)
- build up savings/pay down debt
- be more consistent about exercise
- start taking magnesium & probiotics & maybe cod liver oil (I picked up some magnesium today!)

I hope everyone here is doing well. I kind of miss sidrajedi and her check in questions for keeping up with how we're all doing.

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#605 of 608 Old 12-11-2014, 12:07 PM
 
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Hey everyone! Sorry I've been gone for a while, but my mom finally moved out and into her own place. The kids definitely miss her, but I'm just glad to have our space back to ourselves and getting back into our old routines.

My IUD is out now, but we've decided to wait until the end of January to actively TTC. Right now we're planning on using condoms during my fertile times. We originally planned on TTC right away, but I really want to have a full cycle or two ahead of actively trying since I have had an IUD in for 5+ years. I've been patiently waiting for a few months to get it removed, 4-6 more weeks won't hurt anything.

I miss the check in questions as well!

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#606 of 608 Old 12-12-2014, 01:10 PM
 
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@pokeyac , sleep? What is this sleep thing you speak of? I think I might like it.
I think when the babes start to sleep through the night, we have to learn how to do it all over again ourselves. C has been waking up before 6am every day. I usually am lying in bed awake before he is up anyway.

I'm glad you had such a good talk. It sounds very productive even if you didn't come to an agreement yet.



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#607 of 608 Old 12-12-2014, 05:04 PM
 
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I'm still waiting for the day when my kids sleep through the night. DD is almost 11 and she is still up once or twice, though thankfully she doesn't need me for anything usually. DS is not quite 18 months and wakes every 3-4 hours, sometimes more. It's usually because he has to pee so I don't know any way to get him to sleep through. When he was in diapers he'd fuss til I changed him, now he squirms around til I take him potty. I think I can just say goodbye to a good nights sleep for the next few years.

Me treehugger.gif + DH reading.gif= DD faint.gif (1/2004) & DS babyf.gif (6/2013)
homeschool.gifnovaxnocirc.gifbfinfant.giffemalesling.GIFfamilybed1.gifwaterbirth.jpg
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#608 of 608 Old Today, 01:35 PM
 
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Well I'm officially in the TWW! After all our debating and discussions about reasons for or against TTC, DH got a bit lazy with the birth control. which is exactly how DS happened, so I'm feeling pretty positive about being knocked up. If it doesn't happen this cycle though we'll likely wait til summer, in which case I'll be back to wait with you a bit longer.

Me treehugger.gif + DH reading.gif= DD faint.gif (1/2004) & DS babyf.gif (6/2013)
homeschool.gifnovaxnocirc.gifbfinfant.giffemalesling.GIFfamilybed1.gifwaterbirth.jpg
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