any mama who are jonesing to have another baby, but need to wait? - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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#61 of 215 Old 07-03-2005, 12:57 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GiraffeLovin'Mama
We are on the fence, both dh and I. I was sure I was done, then I just had the surrogacy pregnancy. I'll be 3 wks pp tomorrow and am still on the fence. The end was miserable for me, but my peri thinks it had to do with the surrogacy part, not so much being pregnant.

Anyhow, I guess we'll soon find out (that is if our oops doesn't have me pregnant already )
if it isnt too nosey...and you know any sentence that starts out like that is, were you a surrogat for someone else or did you have a child through a surrogot?

just curious. and nosey.
maya

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#62 of 215 Old 10-14-2005, 06:14 PM
 
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...but no long-term partner and already a single mom/primary financial supporter to 4 yr old. Gotta think about all of our best interests.
But I would love another baby.
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#63 of 215 Old 10-15-2005, 08:07 PM
 
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I am really in need of support, and I'm sure at least a few mamas are also.

I posted above, and I am now a few months into my midwifery program. And it's just as bad as I thought, only I'm really busy so it's reinforcing the fact that it would be unsensible.

Also, no one really replied last time about large spaces between children... family dynamics, etc.

Thanks, much love and light.

 Grateful midwife and peaceful mama to three blissfully birthed, amazing children: dd (10)dd (7) and  ds (5).
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#64 of 215 Old 10-17-2005, 11:04 PM
 
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Hey BLissful maia - I think I posted way at the beginning of this thread - months ago -
Anyhow, that's so great that you're in a midwifery program! And you are fulfilling your dreams and enriching yourself! Right now I really wish I was in your position. Afew months ago when I was "jonesing" for a baby it was just a hormonal (monthly) kind of thing and I really did have wonderful pregnancies and births so I was thinking how awesome it would be to have another. However, DH and I realized that 2 kids was really perfect for us and I soon became excited about the possibility of getting some of my goals back on target and was looking forward to doing some things for me (like, going back to school for either nurse practitioner or midwifery, or just going back into a different area of nursing (I'm an RN). Anyhow, to make a long story short.... I'm pregnant.
It's really hard adjusting to this news that at one point I would have been super happy about. This baby will be 21mths apart from my DD and I'm going to really have my hands full. I'm sure in the end I'll be thrilled with this little bundle but the grass always "seems" greener on the other side of the fence.

I guess I was just writing to tell you - there's a reason you really want to be a midwife and you need to follow that road - you have a wonderful family so take this opportunity to focus a bit on yourself! Hope this is all coming across as super supportive!
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#65 of 215 Old 10-18-2005, 06:58 PM
 
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Count me in. I'm making myself wait until late Winter to TTC. I want my next one at least 24 months younger than the one i have now. It's hard waiting!

Alia + Brian proud parents to Rowan (9/8/04) Lila (9/3/07) and Rhys (6/11/10)
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#66 of 215 Old 10-21-2005, 12:37 AM
 
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I am totally jonesing...But we are going to wait until March 2006
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#67 of 215 Old 10-29-2005, 01:00 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by newmainer

Sooooo.... I guess we need to wait, but man! Do I want another baby!

anyone else?

Yeah, I want another babe already and my DS is only 3 mos!

aknit.gif trekkie.gif mama to DS reading.gif and DD energy.gif autismribbon.gif  

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#68 of 215 Old 10-29-2005, 03:04 PM
 
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Well, I'm not jonesing anymore, I'm expecting.

Mike is going back and forth on the issues of having more after this. He says that what he hears from people with "more than a few" kids is reassuring to him, and that right now he's leaning towards yes. And of course, if he doesn't get snipped, we'll end up doing NFP again to space pregnancies, because ecological breastfeeding and even tandem nursing don't work for us.

As to long-term spaces between children and family dynamics-- every family is different. I think that spacing can have some effect on the relationships between children, but that their personalities will come into play more and more as those children get older. Some kids will be fine with a new sibling at 19 months and others won't be able to handle it until they're older. Unfortunately, there's no way to know until you actually have the next baby which sort your kids will be.

Rynna, Mama to Bean (8), Boobah (6), Bella (4) and Bear (2)
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#69 of 215 Old 11-01-2005, 10:38 PM
 
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Ahhh, yes, I am very much in this boat...
I was going to go to midwifery school this fall but for reasons called family (and a young one at that) I decided to wait on my dream - but then this puts me on a different schedule with family-planning as I am waiting to go back to school until we are finished and our kiddlets are a bit bigger (enough to wave bye when I leave rather than scream in sadness)...

I love being pregnant and have relatively easy pg's but my DH has a hard time with having little ones (life gets much more enclosed then, at least in our household) and it is stretching to be sure - so we planned to wait until this next June 2006 to try but I am dying...

I get to apprenctice right now with a midwife friend and that is a great joy and rare opportunity so I am trying to be content to fill this small part of my life while I wait to get pg... but she will be moving at some point and is the only person I trust to do my birth - so I am a little nervous that I may miss her going-away-time. Trusting is the key I guess... but darned NFP just works so well that no "oops" will happen, I am sure of it. Good right??

Hopefully my sister will fall pg soon and I can live vicariously through her...
Julie

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#70 of 215 Old 11-05-2005, 09:07 PM
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Add me! We haven't been avoiding the past several cycles, but we've been meaning to. DH is waffling, as am I. We wanted to wait til spring, but we have reasons to really try now, but things could be better in the spring, but we really don't want a big age gap between DS and the next, but things could be better... We'll be debating it until I get pg, I guess.
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#71 of 215 Old 11-05-2005, 10:51 PM
 
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I would love to have another one, but for now need to wait. I am in school full time (7:30am - 5pm) and need to get thru school (I'll be done in June 2007). I need to time things so that I am not "otherwise occupied by baby" next September or May 2007 due to Board Examinations. I also need to not be in the early stages of pg until next year this time at the earliest.

So.... count me in for "jonesing for another, but need to wait"

My family: me jog.gif, dh geek.gif, ds reading.gif (11), dd1 hearts.gif (9), and dd2 energy.gif(3).

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#72 of 215 Old 11-14-2005, 07:15 PM
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I am totally wanting to have another baby. My ds is only 5 months and I won't to be pregnant again. Everyone around me either has just had a baby in the last couple of weeks or are pregnant. I really want another one. I also want 5 kids and if we stick to our plan of having them two years apart then I am going to be 37 when we are done. I don't know if that is what I want or if I want to have them all close and be done early.

I have totally got baby fever

Mama to Noah- 05, Eden - 07, Isabella -09 and Cade -11 

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#73 of 215 Old 11-16-2005, 02:50 AM
 
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I totally have baby fever. I have been having a reoccuring dreams that I am going to have twins and soon. I am usually not one to beleive in such things but I dreams of my daughter and we were not actively ttc with her. I know that I will have to wait beacause first of all my hiusband is in Iraq still for another month and while he is good, I think that would be a strech, lol: (sorry couldn't help it!) and he hasn't really gotten to see our 17 month old at all since she was about 2 months old, a few weekends and then it was eight months until her saw her again and that was just 2 weeks this summer. So while I have baby fever my husband just wants to enjoy what he has missed so dearly over the past year. So i will have wait ever so long or so it will seem...but i am sure once he is home the longing for a new little bundle will take a back burner for a little while I hope.
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#74 of 215 Old 11-17-2005, 02:24 AM
 
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Oh goodness I've had it bad for about 7 months now. I can't because my marriage is a bit rocky right now, and I know that it would not be good adding another baby to the mix. My dd is 17 months old, and I'd like to wait untill she's 2 before ttc again.
Another reason is money, I know you can never wait on money to have kids or you'll never have them, but see now I've got this CD habit and I'm not even done with dd's stash yet! Just isn't a good time for me, but I want one so bad I can taste it!
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#75 of 215 Old 11-17-2005, 06:01 PM
 
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A friend just told me she's preg, and I sooooooo want to be pg with her! However, ds is only 10 1/2 mo and AF hasn't returned yet. Plus, going on a family trip next June, and timing wouldn'y be great. Also, I work in a family biz as a tax preparer, and have to time babies around that. We're planning to ttc in mid-February. Ds was born Dec 21, and it was such perfect timing, I just took him to work with me. Gotta love working for your supportive parents! My clients were all really awesome about me having a baby there and breastfeeding in front of them! At least we're managing to plan this one well enough that we'll have money to pay the midwife! But I still really want a baby now! So does dd, 3 yo in Sept, who started telling everyone right after her b-day that she was going to have a tiny little baby sister. I hate waiting!
Crystal
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#76 of 215 Old 11-24-2005, 09:40 PM
 
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I am soooo there and have been since DS was like 3 months old. I am always like that.I LOVE LOVE LOVE being preggie. Love it. Love feeling all womanly and sexy and strong and full of magic and baby. I love laboring at home with just my Dh. I love it all. And so commited to an unassisted hmebirth with our next. And I know there are logical reasons for waiting but my heart is arguing them all away. LOL Now if only I could convince DH. Though technically we are not NOT trying. One of those if it happens it happens. But secretly I am hoping, kwim???
Tonia
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#77 of 215 Old 11-27-2005, 05:10 AM
 
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Woo! Count me in!

There are currently *6* people at work who are pregnant. DS is 21 months and I am REALLY ready to be pregnant. However, (1) we have no money right now, (2) I need to lose some weight, (3) I don't want to spend my last trimester suffering in the GA heat, and (4) DH and I are working hard on strengthening our relationship and we'd like some more time for that before another child. These are all rational reasons to wait but my heart just doesn't understand

Our plan is to TTC in February, when DS will turn 2, assuming we are more financially secure, I'm in good enough shape, and DH and I agree that we are ready for another. I'm not on any birth control and we are using only fertility awareness and the pull-n-pray technique

At any rate, I'm : this thread!

Laura
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#78 of 215 Old 12-05-2005, 01:50 AM
 
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OH MY G-- YES YES YES!!!! My son will be 14 months on the 8th and I SO want to be pregnant--YESTERDAY!! But it is absolutely nutso. I just went back to school in September, DH is still looking for a job, we don't have a house.....I have a thousand reasons why now would be a bad time and a thousand why I really would not care at all if the Ortho failed....
I was literally just about to start a post related to this when I found this....

lovin DH since 1/04, SAHM to 3 boys 10/04, 11/08, 11/10 one girlie (1/07), and one 13 wk (10/13) just your average :ha ng multigenerational living family!!
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#79 of 215 Old 12-05-2005, 07:40 PM
 
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Another?

See sig.
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#80 of 215 Old 12-25-2005, 06:23 PM
 
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Add me to the list of mamas!

My dd is almost 9 months and my dh and I would looooooove another! Which is funny since I had a rough pregnancy, a c/s, and ppd and have spent the last year saying "dd is gonna be an only child"! And now I'm thinking three little ones sounds about right...or maybe a few more.

We're waiting till dd is at least a year though so that I can maximize my chances of a vbac, so that dd gets at least a year of breast milk (I'm planning on nursing through pregnancy, but I've learned that plans don't always work out and if I have another pregnancy like my first one there's just no way I'd be able to nurse!), and so that my grad student dh will be a little closer to finishing his PhD and getting a job (I'm the primary wage earner and financially things are so tight they squeak).

My best friend had her baby a few days ago and hearing her brand new little voice over the phone has me even more convinced that I want/need more babies in my life! Now if only babies came with a complete set of diapers, a few furnishings, a large cash bonus, and a steady job for the dp we'd be trying tomorrow. As it is, we're gonna start trying in April and hope for a "not too big in the summer" pregnancy.

I'm so glad this thread is here...it's hard to be baby-mad but waiting!

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#81 of 215 Old 01-02-2006, 01:25 AM
 
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I think I posted on this thread awhile ago, or one just like it.

My partner was really resistant about having a third, and we weren't doing so hot together. Well, things have really changed for us and fallen into place, and just a few days ago he agreed that we can TTC in October of next year!!!

That is only 9 cycles away for me -- holy crap! I have some concerns about having another baby, mostly financial and work-related. I am also heavier and more out of shape that before (like, what mother isn't?!?) and I want to work on that. I get a lot of aches and pains in pregnancy and want to lost 10 pounds (though I have much more to lose than that) and get fitter at the gym.

As a midwife I have had to think it through because I don't qualify for maternity leave (self-employed) and we cannot live without the income without going far into debt. My plan is to take a few months off totally, and then go back to work taking only a half caseload and have other midwivs cover my backups (where I work there are two midwives at each birth, the primary and the backup). I will bring my baby to clinic and home visits, and my dp will look after the baby (take a day off work) while I am at a births. It helps that I have a milk supply that could feed triplets (quite literally) so pumping EBM would be easy for me for those two births a month.

I had two babies as a midwifery student so I know what being on call with little nurslings is like, and feel I can manage. I will be upfront with any potential clients that they will be seeing a lot of my baby to make sure they are ok with that.

So now I just have to live with waiting. I gave away most of my baby things, so I have to start trolling my friends and family for hand-me-downs (several babies around me, luckily).

I am so pleased because I didn't think dp would ever come around to the idea of another baby. We even shared the news with friends who were TTC (a partner midwife) so it felt REAL!!!! I feel like we have a plan now and am looking forward to baby #3 July 2007 (so FAR away -- and by the grace of s/he above, of course).
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#82 of 215 Old 01-03-2006, 01:30 PM
 
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Did i kill the thread with my long-winded post?
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#83 of 215 Old 01-04-2006, 03:09 PM
 
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Wow, congrats CarolynnMarilynn! I'm so excited for you. I had decided to TTC for three months Sept-Oct-Nov so I could fit it into my hectic midwifery student schedule, but no luck so it's looking like I need to wait until graduation. Which isn't until 2009, so that's a bit of a nightmare. I just wanted to send you my best wishes and encouragement!

 Grateful midwife and peaceful mama to three blissfully birthed, amazing children: dd (10)dd (7) and  ds (5).
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#84 of 215 Old 01-04-2006, 07:51 PM
 
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2009? That seems crazy far away! Hope you are feeling ok to wait.

I am pretty excited. Trying to help myself to get healthier as we speak...
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#85 of 215 Old 01-04-2006, 10:25 PM
 
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Yup, 2009. I know, so sad. I don't feel good about waiting, but I know in my heart it's the best decision so it feels okay. It gives me something to look forward to anyway. Besides, it's 2006. (I keep telling myself that).

Well, I guess that means Ayla and the next one will be about the same age gap as your two youngest. How do you feel about this difference, it weighs heavily on me sometimes. Definitely pros and cons (for me, anyway).

 Grateful midwife and peaceful mama to three blissfully birthed, amazing children: dd (10)dd (7) and  ds (5).
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#86 of 215 Old 01-05-2006, 12:08 AM
 
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My dp is more worried about it than I am, the age-gap I mean. He feels like it will make the little one feel odd-man out, but I disagree. I think there are benefits to being close, like playing together and a close bond. But I think having 7-9 years apart, as mine may have, also brings with it really special benefits, like gentling-down the older ones and making them more sensitive to littler people, at a time when they may start becoming little teeagers and trying out attitude For the baby, how wonderful to have doting older siblings who think they are wonderful! And for us, the parents, I am looking forward to the bit of extra help, and the extra eyes, older siblings brings (but I don't believe in piling on responsibilities on my kids or making them default babysitters). My sister and I are six years apart and it has been great. We are very close now and there was so little sibling rivalry. Also my littlest now, my dd, really needs lots of attention and she is shining being the youngest for right now, but I can see her turning into a little mama by the time the baby comes. I think my ds will like being the eldest. He's such a little authority figure, but sweet and gentle at the same time: this kid is a wonderful human being who is a true diplomat, but likes rules to be followed (even for me! ) Anyway, I am really looking forward to giving them a sibling (can you tell already?)

One small decision that came with deciding to have another baby (but by no means the main reason) is that we would like to bank our baby's cord blood. My son has a genetic disorder (neurofibromatosis) and stem cell therapy is looking the most promising of any current line of research. It is a shot in the dark to bank the cord blood, but hey, it's only money and money is to be used for needs and hopes.

Carolynn
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#87 of 215 Old 01-05-2006, 12:25 AM
 
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Add me to the list!

We were originally planning on TTC 12/05 because I wanted a 9/06 baby. Now 12/05 has came and went and my AF is screwing with me. I know I'm not pregnant though, but I am sadly holding on to the very miniscule chance. Pathetic, huh?

I've decided to go back to school. I will start this summer. And it will be impossible to have a 9/06 baby. But I know I need to have get pregnant soon, so the baby will be older when I need to go to school during the day. I'm crossing my fingers that DH will decide to TTC in March-April. He's happy with just one though, so it will take some begging.
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#88 of 215 Old 01-07-2006, 10:23 PM
 
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So I was shopping and bought an ovulation thermometer. I got such a thrill! I felt a bit silly buying it because I'm not planning to TTC for 9 or 10 cycles, but then I'll have lots of time to prepare, right?

So I'm in the bath wanting to read the leaflet that came with it. Dp comes by and I ask him to hand it to me.

"What's this?"

"A leaflet. Now hand it to me. Please"

"What's the leaflet for?"

"A thermometer. Now please hand it to me"

"What kind of thermometer is it?"

"A thermometer thermometer. You know, the kind to take your temperature"

"AN OVULATION THERMOMETER, isn't it? You BOUGHT an ovulation thermometer. Now I am mad at you"

"Mad at me," I say, "why for?"

"Cuz now you're going to get knocked up the first month we try. It's not natural. I want my three months of practicing!" And walks away with the leaflet.

I yelled at him to come back and just give it to me already. He refuses, saying he doesn't want me that prepared, and: "I'm just not that enthusiastic about this stuff yet", he says.

I ask him to please just hand me the damn leaflet, and shut the door as the bathroom is getting drafty. He whips the leaflet at the floor and walks away. I leave well enough alone.

This morning I ask him about the ovulation thermometer deal again, and he says, "I just want my 3 months worth of practicing!" I told him that waiting to get pregnant is murder. He rolls his eyes and tells me to try not to be so "intense" about getting pregnant. We smooch. Then we talk about the possible colours of the baby's eyes. He's trying so hard to endure my intensity on this issue, but man, he handles himself strange...

Weirdo.
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#89 of 215 Old 01-07-2006, 11:57 PM
 
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Hi, well my dh was like" if you start asking for another baby I will go get a vasectomy that very day!" that was a few months ago. I still have not gotten AF and my baby is almost 20months. Now my dh says "as long as we get in lots of practice I would love to have another baby with you." I am ambivalent. My dd and ds have the flu right now and my dh is working all weekend and I imagined a little newborn in the mix and I said"how????" Where there is heart room ,there is house room , I read somewhere. I am trying to encourage my dh to keep withdrawing in time at least until after May when my youngest turns 2. I don't think I am fertile yet but those are famous last words. I worry about my kids being spaced too close. My two are almost 3 yrs. apart and the next two would be a little over 2and1/2yrs. apart and I feel like I would be cheating my little one out of baby time. I am concerned about money, space, time for myself so I will be a kind mama. On the other hand, I want another baby sooo bad. thanks-Crystal
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#90 of 215 Old 01-11-2006, 11:47 PM
 
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Oops. I think I may have willed myself into being pregnant.

I started spotting today: a week before my period was due and 8 days post ovulation. Oops....

The best laid plans, huh? Excuse the double entendre.

Dp is not thrilled.

Not sure what to wish for: a baby or a period.
CarolynnMarilynn is offline  
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