Many of you have read my prior post about my conversations with DH about having another child. For those that haven't read my prior posts here is a summary.
My dh and I have been together for 17 years, we have a 14 year old and a 6 year old, boy/girl. I desperately want another baby and I really feel that I would feel totally completed in my family if we had one last baby. My husband doesn't think we should have another baby since we have a boy and a girl, they are both healthy so why chance that things might not be so great with a new addition. He also feels that he wouldn't have enough time for another child and that money would be tight. Yes, money might be tight, but I truely feel that we would manage okay.
Anyways, after many discussions I am to a point where I am trying to come to terms that we may never have another baby. I am trying to be okay with this and so I have been trying to determine "why" I want another baby. It's very hard for me to put it into words except to say I just do!!
I have decided to put together a list of pro's and con's to having another baby that I want to share with my dh. I am hoping that maybe I can help him realize that I do understand the difficult parts of having a child, but there are so many good things that come along with having another child!! I was hoping that I could share my list with everyone here and you could give me your imput to thoughts on my list and also anything that maybe I am missing (it's really hard for me to put words to things sometimes).
If I am going to share this with dh I want to ensure that it's perfect. Cons
•Financial strain- primarily daycare cost potentially $600-$900 monthly
•Our time divided by three rather then two kids
•Added strain to our relationship (especially if hubby is not totally on board to have a third)
•morning sickness/tiredness from pregnancy (early pregnancy)
•child could be sick – though tests are pretty good at detecting this in pregnancy
•Having to work with a small child in daycare
•Getting up at night – doesn’t last forever thoughPros
•new dimension to family – more kids to love and grow up together
•Strengthened bond between us – creating a new life together could bring us closer together to share in the creation/pregnancy/birth/child/etc.
•I do not FEEL ready to say that our family is done at 2 – feel that our family is missing someone at times
•would make me happy – I love having kids, they are a very important part of my life
•we are good parents
•we make healthy, smart, beautiful kids
•I like being pregnant (except for the first few months)
•I feel like I may regret not having one more child when I am too old to have anymore kids– If we wait I will be too old (don’t want to have another baby past age 34)
•More potential for grandkids later in life – bigger family get together’s = more fun!!
Realistically, yes there are reasons why it might be better to stick with the two that we have. BUT the feelings are still there and I just can't seem to get it to go away (have been feeling this way for about 3 years now).
Thanks in advance for your input!!!