Using withdrawal method during fertile period? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 39 Old 01-21-2008, 03:55 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Is it irresponsible of me to use the withdrawal method during my fertile period? We actually use it all the time, not just around ovulation. I've seen that some people have used it successfully for many years, but do you use something else around fertile times? I don't think I'd be using it if we were dead set against getting pregnant, but I am looking for personal experiences and facts on this if we're going to continue using it (went off bcp in July).

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#2 of 39 Old 01-21-2008, 04:08 PM
 
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I don't think it is irresponsible if you are ok with the possible preg. Have you ever seen cycle beads? If you have a reg cycle these really help to keep track. My dh had a vas a bit ago and they found sperm in his 1st post vas sample. So now we are still using withdrawel and when I am feeling fertile the dreaded condoms We are certain we are done I am not comfortable taking any chances. I don't know if I helped at all, but my little vent felt good.Thanks.
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#3 of 39 Old 01-21-2008, 06:09 PM
 
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slymama~ I think that the recommendations are that you should not use the withdrawal method during your fertile window and should use an alternative method like condom/etc. if you are not open to a surprise baby.

However, I too am one that uses withdrawal throughout my entire cycle and have never had an accident. Of course if we did, it wouldn't be the end of the world either. We have used this method for nearly 13 years combined between kids and I guess my DH is just that good at it -- no surprises here. I have had many times that I wished maybe a few spermies would slip through, but no suck luck here.
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#4 of 39 Old 01-21-2008, 07:10 PM
 
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I think withdrawl as a method is shown to be 80% effective. So there's a 20% chance that you could get pg if you use withdrawl during your fertile times. So if you're OK with a possible pregnancy, then hey, keep using it!

DH and I sometimes use withdrawl during fertile times but most often use condoms, then don't use either during my non-fertile times.

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#5 of 39 Old 01-21-2008, 07:41 PM
 
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I didn't think my post implied anything beyond that if you are ok with a possible surprise then I wouldn't think it was irresponsible to not use a backup method when you are fertile. I am sorry if I was unclear, I am new to MDC and I hope I can add some helpful insight.
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#6 of 39 Old 01-21-2008, 08:19 PM
 
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I agree, if you strongly didn't want a pregnancy, it'd be better to use another method during those times.

The risks with withdrawal are basically: (1) that the partner doesn't exit in time, (2) that if there is pre-come, a miniscule number of sperm does get into it (3) in particular, this is more likely if he has ejaculated recently--I don't know the time frame, 24 hrs? It probably says on the planned parenthood website somewhere.

If you use withdrawal perfectly and there is never any "error" (I think that just refers to not exiting in time), it actually has an extremely high success rate, according to the planned parenthood site.
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#7 of 39 Old 01-28-2008, 04:23 PM
 
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I agree with Sphinxie - it can be extremely effective! My husband and I have used withdrawal exclusively for several years now, no babies here! The man has to be very careful though, and pull out in time. I personally have enjoyed using this method as it is the least invasive bc method of all. No barriers, no chemical, no hormones.
Now we're TTC, and I'm glad I didn't have to wait for my hormonal cycle to return to normal or anything. I think if you are aware of your body and cycles, and your man can exercise control, it is a pretty effective method. At least, in my opinion.
Hope that helps!

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#8 of 39 Old 01-28-2008, 11:49 PM
 
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We used withdrawal as our only source of birth control for years. Then it failed six weeks after I gave birth. I read somewhere that withdrawal becomes LESS effective after you've already had a baby, and the risk doesn't go down for a couple of years. I wish I had the research citations to back that up, but for now, I'm a believer. We will be doing withdrawal, but using some backup method too. I'm not sure WHAT method, as I don't want anything permanent, anything with hormones, or condoms, so that makes things a bit difficult. :
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#9 of 39 Old 01-29-2008, 12:19 AM
 
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My husband and I used withdrawl after I got my cycle back in Oct., with DD2 19 months old,and I got pregnant that same month. So...I am not a big believer in this method anymore, at least not for us. The main thing for us was that we weren't totally opposed to getting pregnant again or we would have used something more effective. Now we know.
Jessie

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#10 of 39 Old 01-29-2008, 11:11 AM
 
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We used withdrawal during my fertile periods (including day before and of ovulation) for at least 5 cycles while practicing FAM. The first cycle that we decided to TTC (and not pull-out) we got pregnant. It was very effective for us. We will probably use it after the baby is born also.

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#11 of 39 Old 01-29-2008, 05:59 PM
 
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with perfect use of the withdrawl method it can be up to 96% effective over the course of 1 year, thems pretty good odds, unless your dh doesnt have it down quite right, then the effectiveness goes way down.

check this out- 10 year old data, but usefull.
http://www.fda.gov/Fdac/features/1997/conceptbl.html
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#12 of 39 Old 01-29-2008, 08:13 PM
 
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I read somewhere too, after the fact, that it is most effective if there has been no ejaculation within 24-48 hours before using the withdrawl method. Because sperm remain in the tract and will be present in the pre-ejaculate. Can't remember where I read this though.

Jessie

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#13 of 39 Old 01-29-2008, 08:22 PM
 
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DS is a withdrawal baby. And it's not about "him being good at it" as his bio-dad didn't even ejaculate.

IMO, using withdrawal during the fertile time is "irresponsible" if you're dead-set against another pregnancy. But if you're open to a surprise pg, then I wouldn't call it 'irresponsible."

If you're using withdrawal during times of "questionable fertility" (the first few days of fertile-ish CM, the day or two after O) and completely abstaining during the period of highest fertility, then it's a lot more effective.

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#14 of 39 Old 01-29-2008, 08:28 PM - Thread Starter
 
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That all makes sense Ruthla (and others). The more I read the more I see about the sperm remaining there 24-48 hours. But then again I read that urinating afterwards or beforehand is supposed to clear that out. Who knows! Since we haven't even had dc#1 I wouldn't be totally opposed to an accident and would probably do things a little different if we really had to be careful. Thanks!

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#15 of 39 Old 01-29-2008, 08:31 PM
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It's not irresponsible, IMO, as long as you are REALLY "not trying, but not not trying."

My husband and I use it, because he likes it slightly better than having to use condoms. But, I know he prefers the non-fertile times.

We are TTC now, so he's all the time.
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#16 of 39 Old 01-29-2008, 11:48 PM
 
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It really depends upon how good your partner is at this. My DH is VERY good. We have been together now for almost 14 years, except like the first couple of years this is the only method that we have used. I have been pregnant 3 times, all times were planned.

Doula, Wife and mom to A (11/23/01) and O (5/7/09)
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#17 of 39 Old 01-30-2008, 01:43 AM
 
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So all those withdrawal babies where dad was actually good at it must be that 4% pregnancy rate..if it's 96% effective.

I am a little nervous if we use this method during the fertile period..which we just did about 10 days ago. But if it happens I guess we will have to deal.

So far though the only time we got pregnant was when we didn't use any method. Our first baby took a month...second took 9 mos but I was nursing and 7 of those was getting my cycle back.

Guess I will know soon enough if there were any escapees
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#18 of 39 Old 02-19-2008, 06:43 AM
 
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We've also been using withdrawal method for over 5 yrs, since we resumed lovin' after DS was born LOL.

What happened was I was at a point where I didn't want to take anymore hormonal BC and I didn't want an IUD because of the whole potentially abortificant (?spelling) aspect about it, as I'm Catholic and it's just not for me. (I don't judge others, heck, I'm pro-choice LOL!)

So I told DH it was his call. I didn't really want anymore children, and he didn't either but we both agreed that if it happened we would be thrilled and love to add to our family but it was not our plan. So I let him take control of it and he has done good I guess you could say LOL!!

Our 2 children are totally planned and we got pregnant the first month of TTC so I know we have a high fertility together.

Anyway, now I'm hitting "advanced maternal age" and our youngest is getting so big we really think we are done and are both to the point of not wanting another one, so he'll be getting a V when he gets home from this deployment.

I should also add in he's been gone for nearly the past year so that helps me not get pregnant as well LOL!!
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#19 of 39 Old 02-22-2008, 04:20 PM
 
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There's alot of information available now that says withdrawal is a reasonably effective contraceptive method, and that failures are due to error in use.

This can be failure to completely withdraw prior to ejaculation, or failure to urinate between episodes of sexual contact (semen, and thus sperm, can live in the urethra if not flushed out). Barring those failures, there isn't thought to be sperm in pre-ejaculate.

Many people find withdrawal to be a comfortable contraceptive method.
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#20 of 39 Old 02-25-2008, 02:42 PM
 
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We used the withdrawal method for 2.5 years and combined it with charting for a few months. I stopped charting and we just used withdrawal... until I got pregnant. Granted, the specific time of conception, we had been drinking so dp was not as quick as usual possibly. So, not irresponsible, but maybe use an extra precaution if dh is tired or has been drinking. And be sure you would be okay with it if you got pregnant.

  

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#21 of 39 Old 02-25-2008, 04:54 PM
 
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Originally Posted by jennifer0246 View Post
There's alot of information available now that says withdrawal is a reasonably effective contraceptive method, and that failures are due to error in use.

This can be failure to completely withdraw prior to ejaculation, or failure to urinate between episodes of sexual contact (semen, and thus sperm, can live in the urethra if not flushed out). Barring those failures, there isn't thought to be sperm in pre-ejaculate.
Yup! We've been doing this for 4 years and haven't even come close to having an Oops. DH has great self control (and really does not want a baby at this time!). And 96% of the time it is about self control (and flushing out the urethra), but of course, there is that other 4% that is just the BC method failure rate - which every method has to some % or another.

I'm Kellie :, married to Chris , and mom to one baby girl (7/12/09).
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#22 of 39 Old 02-25-2008, 05:03 PM
 
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We've been using this method for over 10 years and it has worked for us. Both kids were planned. While we both don't want anymore kids (at least not for a while), it wouldn't be the end of the world if it did happen. That's why we continue to use it.
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#23 of 39 Old 03-14-2008, 09:04 PM
 
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just chiming in! My Dh and I have used withdrawal for the past year--I was one the pill before that, condoms before that--and I haven't gotten pregnant yet. Well now we are TTC so we'll see how it turns out...

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#24 of 39 Old 03-14-2008, 09:33 PM
 
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This is all we haved used since our 1st was born 3 years ago. Now that we have 2 we are seriously considering dh getting a V. But for now we are using withdrawl and if we get pg it will be ok. I think that as long as you are ok with having a baby then it is not irresponsible. All b/c methods have a failure rate, I was conceived while my parents were using spermicide.
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#25 of 39 Old 03-16-2008, 11:16 AM
 
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One word... well ok a composite word - "pre-cum".

All you should know is that you're increasing your chance to get pregnant by several hundred times using withdrawal instead of a condom. It's your call though.
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#26 of 39 Old 03-16-2008, 05:02 PM
 
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Originally Posted by inurl View Post
One word... well ok a composite word - "pre-cum".

All you should know is that you're increasing your chance to get pregnant by several hundred times using withdrawal instead of a condom. It's your call though.
That's simply not true. Done correctly, withdrawal method is approximately as effective as condom use. "Precum" does not contain any sperm, unless it washes out sperm still residing in the tubes from a previous ejaculation.

The difference is not in the ideal use conception rates (both are about 95% effective), it's in the rate that they get used ideally (that is, many men do not withdraw at an appropriate time, or ejaculate too close to the vagina).

Look up the book Contraceptive Technologies, or investigate at Planned Parenhood online.
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#27 of 39 Old 03-16-2008, 05:26 PM
 
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Just wanted to add a :. Studies have shown no viable sperm in precum. That precum normally contains sperm is a myth.

And condoms are 2% effective with normal use. Withdrawl is 4% effective with normal use. So while condoms are obviously more effective, they are hardly hundreds of times more effective. We will take the 2% greater chance to not have to mess with condoms.

I'm Kellie :, married to Chris , and mom to one baby girl (7/12/09).
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#28 of 39 Old 03-17-2008, 02:12 PM
 
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DH and I have a withdrawal baby too.
I also suggest the cycle beads. I love mine.
FWIW, we still use the withdrawal method
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#29 of 39 Old 03-23-2008, 11:10 PM
 
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this is definitely how i got pregnant with my second pregnancy.

i won't mess with it again. as much as i hate condoms, they're better than an unwanted pregnancy.
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#30 of 39 Old 03-26-2008, 03:47 PM
 
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I just saw the OP's sig line says she is due Nov 08! Congratulations!! Just curious if this was because the withdrawal method didn't work for you??

We use withdrawal only, but I am starting to also track my cycles, so that we can be more liberal during the infertile times. It has worked so far for almost four years (though the first 18 months I was not ovulating yet).
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