Mothering Forum banner

Chat Thread

3K views 38 replies 6 participants last post by  lerlisha 
#1 ·
Thought it might be fun to have a general chatter thread.

We are still working on night weaning DS and seeing some progress, but its not been the easiest thing we've ever done. Today we went to a second hand kids shop and I got a plain t-shirt that I'm going to make into a "Big Brother" shirt for DS for when we are ready to "announce." Probably around Valentine's Day. This week should be pretty busy between work and DH going out of town, though we have a fun play date planned while he's gone.

How is everyone else doing?
 
#2 ·
Hanging in there -- the trip for the celebration of life thing for my grandmother was rough on both me and DS -- our sleep schedules are all wacky and I wish I could have taken a week to recover instead of being back at work. We're also trying to night wean. DH ended up on the floor with him early this morning because the little stinker was used to sleeping with me for a week when we were traveling with on demand nursing, but that really can't happen with 5am wake up for me. This weekend we're thinking about cutting off nursing completely, which means I need to pick up some cabbage just in case my body goes wacky.
 
#3 ·
Ahh sorry to hear the sleep schedules are off. That can really throw you for a loop!

On night weaning - we've been moving back the "milk is sleeping" time by about 1/2 hr each night (though a few nights we've jumped ahead a bit...). Tonight is 4:30am. But DS always does MUCH better when I'm not in the room - the other night I slept downstairs from about 9:45p-3:45a - AMAZING! Makes me realize how interrupted my sleep still is. Anyway we're getting close to having the milk be sleeping the whole night, but I don't think that will mean smooth sailing - when I was in bed with them last night, DS wailed for quite a while in the 1-1:30 range, mad that I was there but he couldn't have milk. Its tough, though, because DH doesn't sleep well with DS in the bed, because he's always thrashing around. I think with #2 we may have to seriously consider a different sleeping arrangement from the start - I have LOVED many aspects of co-sleeping/bed-sharing, but would much rather not be in this place again 2 years from now...its so hard on us and we're all so exhausted. I'm thinking maybe side-carring a crib or a floor bed might be the way to go, so the little one is close by, but has their own sleep space. We'll see though, I was pretty fierce about having DS very close in the early months...probably have to take things as they come.

Good luck this weekend!
 
#4 ·
I found out this week that a close friend is also pregnant and due in August - SO exciting!! I'm really happy to get to share things with her along the way. I had a different "pregnancy buddy" the first time around, and it was so special to have someone going through things so close to me, and so magical when the babies were born.
 
#5 ·
@FyerFly We have the same issue right now. I want more space at night and am sleeping lightly because of the pregnancy, so not well at all. My two year old has a cold too, which has set us back. I've been nursing him more, but it's surprisingly easier than it was even a few nights ago. With my third pregnancy we had a toddler bed in the room. She was not happy about being in the toddler bed, but she tolerated it and it worked out. I told her that she could nurse when the light came in the room from outside...if she was quiet before then. :) She would lay in her bed silently, and then at the crack of dawn she would jump up and say that it was time! It was actually really cute and helped prepare my mind for the impending nursing discomfort. I got a better night's sleep too. My three boys transitioned to a toddler bed in their sibling's room easily at 18 months without much problem. They would come into our bed in the middle of the night. We have two mattresses in our room and I would tell the toddler to sleep in their father's bed for now. It worked for them. Each kid needed something different. I have not figured out this two year old yet. ;)
 
#6 ·
@~Chava~ thats interesting that each of your LOs had unique experiences! Good luck figuring out this two-year-old, haha! I liked your comment about the smooth transition for your DS's to their own space in sibling's room around 18 mo. I've been wondering if that might work for us this time around, because in essence its still co-sleeping if the two LOs are sleeping in the same room together!! We'll see...at the moment, we only have one workable bedroom for all of us (the other one is in the basement, down steep creaky stairs on the opposite side of the house), but it may be by the time this baby is 18 mo that we are in a new place. In fact, I think thats pretty likely. We moved to this house years before we got pregnant with DS, so my "criteria" for a new place will be very different the next time around!!
 
#7 ·
I went back to my first prenatal yoga class of this pregnancy today. Same class and teacher I went to with DS. I was worried that it wouldn't be as good as I remembered -- but I think it was even better! Soo different now that I have so little time to myself (between work and DS, etc.) It was really great to just have some time to breathe and stretch and squat and let my mind relax. Interestingly, I found myself getting a little emotional - I think being back in that class brought back a lot of memories of when I was pregnant the first time around that just came flooding back, it was like I was seeing DS's pregnancy/early weeks/babyhood flash before my eyes!! Made me think that I probably have a lot of emotions bubbling under the surface that I don't access or give time to often enough.
 
#8 ·
After a crazy painful session I cut DS off on Saturday night -- it was rough, but we're actually getting better about sleeping sooner than I thought we would. He still needs to touch me when he's going to sleep so we start off in the big bed and either DH or I transfer him to his bed after he's fully asleep -- it just depends on how I'm feeling. I'm thinking about doing things differently with this next baby where we have the crib side-carred only up until 9 months and we transition to sleeping on their own and into a shared room with DS around 18 months. But we'll see how it goes!

I wish we had prenatal yoga classes that fit my schedule - SO many things for moms are offered during the workday. We had a wonderful non-profit that offered them when I was pregnant with DS, but they folded due to grant mismanagement. I feel like up until they closed it helped my back SO much.

How's the weather where everyone is at? We've had some days in the high 60s, which has been glorious given that we're in the midwest and it's February. I don't think, though I do hope, it will last. Being pregnant with ice and snow with DS was NO fun.
 
#9 ·
@justlizzy so is DS night weaned or all-the-way weaned? I like your plan for sleep stuff this time around, sounds very similar to what I'm thinking. I think the bottom line is if we can co-sleep with the new baby without having him or her share a sleep surface (meaning without them in our actual bed), we might all be better off a lot sooner. But as with everything, we'll see.

Luckily our prenatal yoga classes are offered mostly evenings and weekends. There are some weekday daytime classes, but I cant really go to those even though my schedule is flexible, because they either happen the mornings I'm teaching, or when I have to watch DS because DH is working. Saturday mornings are the best time for me, its really nice to look forward to and a good start to the weekend. Such a bummer about that non-profit folding -- you might benefit from youtube videos or DVDs? I've personally never gotten into them, I definitely am much more motivated by a live class (and other people watching so I actually DO stuff and stick with it, ha).

Weather has been unseasonably warm here too. I'm loving it, but we have really hot summers, so I wouldn't mind a long-ish spring. I loved that I had DS right at the beginning of summer (early June) and I'm a little wary of how much I'll be able to get out and around when I'm super big and pregnant in the stagnant heat of July and August...
 
#10 ·
Second Trimester!!

I think most of us are just about in (or very close to) the second trimester!!

Checking in ... how's everyone doing/feeling? Any creative announcements? Let us know what you've been up to!!
@lerlisha @MamaThankingGod @aillidh08 @DivaMommy17 @aliciahorsley @katiesophie @mrsbonjangles @MChristopherson @~Chava~ @Fembot @Gaia88 @gzornblat @justlizzy

AFM, I had a monster headache this weekend and am looking forward to coasting through this week, because when its done, I'll have a week off for spring break! I will look through DS's newborn stash (clothes/diapers) and make a list of anything we need because we have a great semi-annual rummage sale coming up in March.

Looking forward to your updates!!
 
#11 ·
13+1 today! Which means the blog/social media announcement is coming up soon.

We had a three day weekend in Chicago so DH could present a paper at a conference. DS and I pretty much just bummed around in the hotel the entire time. I ended up taking today off too so I could rest up after the weekend and it turned out to be the BEST decision I've made in a while for my health. I'm still tired, but the cough seems to have resolved finally (only took nearly a month).
@FyerFly -- DS is completely night weaned! While it was a sudden cut off, surprisingly I was only uncomfortable for maybe a day or two, nothing that cabbage compresses couldn't help :) He also surprised the heck out of us last night and pooped on the potty before bed. He keeps asking to use the potty so we'll keep encouraging it. I may need to go buy some pull ups this weekend. It would be SO nice to have him trained before baby 2 arrives :)
 
#12 ·
@FyerFly A big rummage sale sounds like fun, and a great way to get some things for the new babe! I've been trying to round up and organize all our old baby clothes. Soon I will need to sort things by size, but I figure I still have a lot of time for that.
@justlizzy Congratulations on weaning! It sounds like it wasn't too difficult in the end, and I'm glad you weren't too uncomfortable. We haven't weaned, but DD nurses much less, and will accept being told "not now, my boobies need a break."

I'm happy to be in the 2nd trimester (15 weeks) , and I feel a lot better too. Less nausea, more energy, and all around feeling more positive. I heard the heartbeat for the first time, and I'm starting to feel subtle movements. We also started sharing the news, which is pretty exciting.

This baby is feeling so much more real now. I'm not just pregnant, but I'm pregnant with my next child. I find myself daydreaming about what they will be like. DD moved almost non-stop when she was in my womb, but this baby seems pretty chill (at least right now!) I'm really excited to see how my children will be different, and in which ways they will be the same.

I feel like I'm in that happy-glowing stage of pregnancy, with my small cute bump. We shall see how long this glow lasts!
 
#13 ·
@justlizzy ahhh night weaning; I am about to embark on that journey soon. I just don't know how to go about it. My other kids weaned themselves, but this one gets the short end of the stick having a sibling so close and I just don't have it in me to tandem again. I am going on nursing over 4 years straight, so I need a few months break before I embark on another 2-3 years. Any tips?

16 and a half weeks.... Still haven't felt any movement, ugh it's driving me crazy. I hate having an anterior placenta. We have our ultrasound booked for the 27th or March; cannot wait to find out the sex; still crossing my fingers for a girl. ?
 
#14 ·
@justlizzy looking forward to your announcement pic! So glad to hear your cough has resolved, they can linger on for what feels like FOREVER. Congrats on night weaning! And on the poo in the potty! Our DS is kind of fickle about the potty, but we've had some success. I also think it would be great if he learns to use the potty more regularly before #2 arrives, but he really doesn't seem completely ready just yet, so we'll have to see how it plays out.
@Fembot so exciting that you heard the heartbeat and are feeling movements!!! I love the idea of daydreaming - I haven't spent much time picturing #2 , but I am definitely thinking a lot about DS becoming a big brother and what that will mean. I hope when I start feeling more obvious movement that I'll start feeling a little more connected with the baby. Our lives are so busy right now I don't take enough time to calmly think/daydream/let my mind wander. Thanks for the reminder about how nice that can be. I hope your happy-glowing stage lasts a long time!!!!
@mrsbonjangles we also just finished night weaning a few weeks ago - my tips (which I got from our sleep coach) are to "model" the calm, relaxed, restful state that you want your LO to be in, no matter how upset they may get, to pick a plan you think will work for you and be very consistent with it, and to offer water as an alternative overnight and a snack in the early morning (preferably one they can get themselves without you having to get up/leave the room/prepare it). I found the hardest part to be staying calm myself -- when DS would be upset because I told him the milk was sleeping, it was so hard for me not to cry myself!!! But very slowly over time (about 3 weeks) we gradually had the milk be "sleeping" a bit longer each night, and now he seems to be fine going from about 7pm-6am or sometimes even longer without nursing. Very exciting that your ultrasound is coming up soon!!
 
#15 ·
Thanks @Fyerfly I am about ready wean tonight if he bites my nipples one more time haha giving in is going to be hard for me in the middle of the night when I'm so tired, I have a habit of just going here, have a boob and we can all go to sleep.
 
#16 ·
@mrsbonjangles -- I did it rather suddenly. What helped a lot with the night nursing for me was wearing a sports bra to bed that couldn't easily be moved by me or the toddler. He actually asked to nurse randomly last night, but I just reminded him that mommy doesn't have any milk left, and he dropped it pretty easily. Also, if you feel any discomfort at all I found that cabbage compresses helped a lot.
@FyerFly -- we'll be working on potty training more this weekend. DH got pulled to moderate at a departmental conference last minute, so we'll just be around the house and probably try doing the bare bottom thing as much as we can. I picked up the book Oh Crap Potty Training at the recommendation of a mom in my last DDC and it looks like we're at the prime age to do it!
 
#17 ·
@justlizzy whatever success we have had, particularly with poo, has usually been bare bottom. Apparently there was a big success today (literally and figuratively) while i was defending my dissertation proposal, so hopefully we are still moving in the right direction. I keep thinking when the weather gets warmer we will just go for it more in earnest...sometimes I think the halfway thing is confusing for him.
 
#18 ·
@FyerFly -- yeah, I agree that the half in diapers and half out is probably confusing. DS has been using "potty" as an excuse to not go down for a nap/for the night, and it was a little maddening last night. We had some more successes over the weekend -- but I agree with warmer weather being needed, our's has been ALL over the place which has been a little more than annoying. We were getting sleet Thursday night and Saturday/Sunday it was in the mid-60s. SO annoying.
 
#19 ·
@justlizzy HA so funny - our DS is also becoming a master of excuses - anything not to go to sleep! Tonight he commented on the diaper pail ("trash can?") and I told him yes, there are stinky diapers in that trash can. He proceeded to wave his hand and say "pppeeeeeuuuuuww!" for the next 5 minutes, refusing any and all attempts to get him into his diaper and pajamas and start the bedtime routine. We did have an awesome potty day, though - two poo successes, both on my "watch"! So hopefully there won't be as many stinky diapers in the pail soon, hahahahahah...

I feel kind of conflicted about the weather. I'm definitely ready for spring, but I also dont think I'll appreciate it as much because we didn't have much of a winter!
 
#20 ·
Had such a lovely chat with some friends who came to visit today - they are all quite a bit younger than me (like by almost a decade) so none of them have embarked on parenthood yet, but somehow our conversation turned to birth and birthing options - it was so fun! I feel like I've reached a point in my personal self-education about birth where I feel really comfortable with my choices and also fairly well versed in other options, so it's fun to talk about with people for whom its all very "new" :)

Also hosted a baby shower yesterday for another friend who is due in April - it was a blast!!! Very very low key, just what she asked for, with lots of delicious food and everyone brought a copy of a favorite children's book. The weather turned out so beautifully, it was just a lovely day overall!! And DH stayed home with DS because it was during his nap time, so I got to be a "hands free" attendee -- a rare and lovely treat these days (which I can only imagine will get rarer with the addition of #2 ).

The next few weeks are going to be super busy for DH and I, but I'm feeling pretty positive about it, probably because "the end is in sight" for my teaching, and once we get through a few hard weeks (by mid-May) hopefully summertime will be a lot more relaxing. We'll still have a lot of work to do, but just less daily intensity and pressure from our jobs, etc.

What's going on for everyone else these days?
 
#21 ·
Work is picking up -- we published a huge NEPA document on the 17th, so we're in comment h*ll and public meetings are happening in the next couple weeks. DH is also rushing to get another chapter submitted to one of his committee members -- two of them asked to see chapter examples BEFORE he submitted the dissertation proposal, so life has been a little stressy.

We did buy our state park pass over the weekend, and managed to get out twice! It felt good to get out into the woods and hike again. We're hoping to squeeze in some camping during the spring/summer too. :)
 
#22 ·
Oooh public meetings. Good luck with those! My background is in urban planning, I've seen a lot of very passionate personalities and opinions at public meetings over the years :)

WOW they wanted chapters before the proposal?? I'm glad my committee didn't, because there's no way I'd be past that stage if they did! I've heard that can happen in some programs, though - and in some ways it can be nice, that you finish the proposal and already have a few chapter drafts under your belt. I've been spinning my wheels with software issues this week, am really looking forward to getting back to seeing progress each time I sit down.

State park pass! FUN! We're also planning a short camping trip in April as well as a stay in a cabin for a few days in July. I'm planning to stay pretty close to home in August, though, probably will plant myself and DS at the neighborhood pool pretty much every day haha!
 
#23 ·
@FyerFly -- our backgrounds aren't TOO dissimilar. I'm an environmental scientist for a transportation planning firm. SO many raging cases of NIMBY with this one.

Having a couple chapters done going in is the only reason he was willing to do it -- he said he *may* need to flesh them out a touch more, but at least there's progress!
 
#24 ·
DS has started really cracking me up lately. He's been reasonably verbal for a few months now (I'd say the first of the calendar year was a pretty big turning point, and he's just built from there) but the funny part is that now he's really developing more diction and emphatically pronouncing consonants. The other night at bathtime, he just keep looking at me with a quizzical face, saying "WhaTTT??" With a very strong "t" sound. He's also started up with "YeP" and "NoPe" and "Come UP." The more he emphasizes the consonants, the cuter and funnier it is.

However. He's also reaching that stage (please tell me its a stage) where he can melt down at the drop of a hat over ANY.THING. I'm sure some of it is still tired/hunger related, but other times - my goodness - I'll even stay really calm and try to work through solutions with him, but he just gets in this zone sometimes where nothing can convince him not to be extremely histrionic and very loudly upset about (X). I'm just hoping either he mellows out a bit before #2 arrives, or that we come up with some good coping strategies before then, because...whew!!!

Anyone else have funny or challenging things going on with older siblings?
 
#25 ·
We're in the melt down at the drop of a hat stage too here! Also DS has become more and more physical lately, so we're trying to practice gentle with mommy, but you can wrestle with daddy. It works well most of the time with the exception of the nights DH is teaching.

We've also been completely wonky as far as sleep goes this week -- all of us have been going to bed WAY too late :-/
 
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top