WHY do WAHM"S have to be suspicous? - Mothering Forums

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Old 08-26-2004, 02:49 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I wish I could have read the past thread on why WAHM's buy other cloth diapers.
I just wanted to say I love buying other WAHM's and wish funds would allow me do buy more. I LOVE LOVE LOVE showing off other types of diapers. Anyways, I found out why I never recieved a diaper I bought from a another WAHM and it saddens me to think that many WAHM's have to be worried of someone stealing there design. It's saddens me more that some out truly out there to do that very thing.

Why can't we a diapering community be more supportive of cloth in general? Why do WAHM's have to feel so defensive? I know it takes just a few bad apples and that makes me angery. What is going to take to create an atmosphere of friendship and not enemies?

I'm not sure where I'm going with this post but hope that cloth diapers can create a sense of unity and not bitter feelings towards one another.

Cloth diapering is so much fun and to be able to share that with others is awesome. We read posts all the time about how exciting it is to "convert" someone. Why even as a WAHM, I can't convert someone with a variety of WAHM diapers? I think the more variety the more fun. It would be boring if all cloth were the same.

Anyways, I'm just rambling but I guess I just want to say that I hope moms and WAHM's alike can continue to promote cloth without drama and create unique friendships and help others get excited about cloth!!! Wouldn't that benifit everyone?
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Old 08-26-2004, 02:51 PM
 
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You had a WAHM not send you a diaper because they were suspicious of you? Thats odd.... Im sorry
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Old 08-26-2004, 02:56 PM
 
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How sad! Poor mama!
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Old 08-26-2004, 02:57 PM
 
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Hugs to you momma!

I'm a new WAHM and I'd hate to think I may never be able to purchase from another WAHM because of suspision! That's sad. I hope it never happens to me!

We should all be friends and not enemies! What is this world coming to?
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Old 08-26-2004, 02:58 PM
 
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that is odd! I have a TON of other WAHM diapers, I don't sew diapers anymore, but I also have other people's wool items too. (I Love MM) I have never been treated that way. I would seriously think that the WAHM you ordered from is a little loose in the noggin yk? I mean I wouldn't be suspicious unless someone asked me to send them my pattern and then asked a ton of design questions (like how do you hide the snaps? -how many snaps do you use? what order to you sew in?). And even then I would probably STILL help them out (I have been known to do that with new knitting WAHM's) but you know I don't think it HURTS anyone's business to help people create, I mean it is about hard work and talent to a lot of extent, and if your not willing to put in the work to design your own pattern, test your own stuff, and you don't have the talent to put things together to make things look right, then you won't make it as a WAHM even if you copy a big time diaper yk? Business is a LOT more about the person and their integrity and customer service and less about patterns and designs, there are very VERY few designs that are totally orginal, but we still have our favorites.
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Old 08-26-2004, 03:01 PM
 
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Fear is the mind killer!

Yes, indeed. I love wahm stuff, it rocks my world. So sorry you had a dissappointment. Sorry for the wahm too.
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Old 08-26-2004, 03:01 PM
 
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I dont think I've ever known a wahm to not send to someone (or refuse business) to another wahm because of fear from being copied.

Maybe if that customer was known for copying?

I've also never known a wahm to actually confront someone and say "I will not send to you".

sorry you got dissed. I think most wahms are not like this. If wahms stopped buying from other wahms... a lot of stores would be ghost towns LOL
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Old 08-26-2004, 03:03 PM
 
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With most of the diaper WAHM's that I know....that would be very odd indeed for them to not accept an order from you just based on "she's a WAHM, she might copy me" suspicion.
So, either she's a really paranoid WAHM, or she has good cause to refuse your order, or you're reading something into her response to you.

I have many many diaper WAHM friends. We share a great deal with each other, including helping one another with designs & materials & such. But there ARE people out there who *will* copy someone's hard work, and that hurts a great deal when you are the one being copied.

Most WAHM's do reserve the right to refuse service for any reason. That is their perogative, and they do not need to tell you why they are unwilling to accept your order. It could be any number of reasons.
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Old 08-26-2004, 03:08 PM
 
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Pamela I can't even believe anyone would ever be suspicious of you about anything!!! I'm so sorry this happened
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Old 08-26-2004, 03:11 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Well what happened was I was starting side snapping it was on my website that I would have side snapping soon and I happen to buy a side snapping from another WAHM. She apparently didn't like that too much. I bought a small because I have a new baby on the way and I wanted another side snapping besides my own to show off at an upcoming LaLeche leaugue conference.
Oh well its her loss. I was just so hurt by it and to think some WAHM's have to be suspisious. It would never even cross my mind to sell to another WAHM. I love promoting cloth of all kinds. I wish my youngest could wear some of that hyena stuff out there. I have a couple of diapers my daughter could never wear because of her recurring UTI's but I never sold them because they were awesome to show off.

So that's why she was suspisous. It was bad timing on my part but still, we should all be supportive of each other,whether we are WAHM's or not, plain and simple!!
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Old 08-26-2004, 03:12 PM
 
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Wow, you can't always live in fear.

That's too bad Sorry!
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Old 08-26-2004, 03:19 PM - Thread Starter
 
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P.S.
For those that saw my pathetic stash or lack there of can back me up. I have nothing to even copy lol!! Ask anyone at the AZ diaper party!!

My stash is basically really bad sewn diapers that I would never even show someone....lol

My daughter wore the stuff I would never dream to sell or even let someone see. hehe

I really want more diapers to show off. Now that I don't live on a college campus where it was so easy to convert someone to cloth, I need some good stuff to show neighbors I'm so afraid to buy from someone now. I bought a newborn fitted yesterday(custom) and I actually used another email so the WAHM wouldn't think twice. I just hate to have someone wonder.
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Old 08-26-2004, 03:22 PM
 
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Wow! That's truly truly SAD!
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Old 08-26-2004, 03:24 PM
 
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Sorry that you are dealing with that......

I have a different product/situation but I will tell you that I am the first to point a potential customer to another WAHM who might be able to accomodate them when I cannot. I have always said that we are all in this together!
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Old 08-26-2004, 03:57 PM
 
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This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard, because if you had your heart set on copying someone all you would have to do is buy second-hand or used.

I like it when WAHMs buy from me! I've always sort of considered it a compliment.

~Kira
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Old 08-26-2004, 04:14 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom2Sailor
I like it when WAHMs buy from me! I've always sort of considered it a compliment.

~Kira


Beside it's a two way street, if I have the $$ why wouldn't I support another wahm?

mum to a crew...
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Old 08-26-2004, 05:34 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom2Sailor
I like it when WAHMs buy from me! I've always sort of considered it a compliment.

~Kira
my thoughts exactly!
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Old 08-26-2004, 06:17 PM
 
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I like it when WAHMs buy from me! I've always sort of considered it a compliment.
Same with my mom. When a well known WAHM orders from her she's like "OMG so and so just ordered MY diapers?!?!?!?" and she gets all excited, to her it means she makes a good product if other WAHMs are buying it
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Old 08-26-2004, 09:05 PM
 
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Unfortunately I think anyone in business has to be suspicious. I am starting a business making baby shoes and have been making shoes for over a year. I have never owned or seen in person any of the "other" brands because I don't want either a WAHM or other company coming at me saying I copied them. My shoes will be similar in some ways to what is already out there but I have quite a few designs that I have never seen done and then it will be my turn to be suspicious.

I can see how it would be upsetting to you about the other WAHM. When I first decided to start a business I e-mailed another WAHM to see why her shoes were considered "different" from the big names. I wasn't looking for a secret or anything like that but I also didn't want to find myself in a place where I could be considered a copycat. She never answered me so now I have no idea and I'm not going to chase her down and have her say I am harassing her or something later on. I guess we all have to take our chances unfortunately and hope for the best!

I think we can all safely say we feel sorry for you and hope to never have that happen to us. Eat some chocolate and take a deep breath and feel lucky that you are able to be a WAHM.
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Old 08-26-2004, 09:37 PM
 
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That is so sad. May be she isn't doing well and is blameing others instead of fixing her own problems. After all it is impossible to prevent another from doing dishonest things so why worry about it?
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Old 08-27-2004, 02:51 AM
 
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excuse my sarcasm here but, are side snaps a new concept? Whatever!

I actually have known of WAHM's who have special discount codes for other wahms... If someone wants to copy they will find a way. That is sad...
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Old 08-27-2004, 10:09 AM
 
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Your thread title should be "Why is XXX so suspicious" .
I would never not sell to anyone unless there was a personal issue with that person (mostly if they want a fetish item, or confrontational-never has happened, but I guess it could). I am sorry you were refused service. It's too bad you cannot share the emails/discussion with this wahm. Every wahm is different, but we aren't all suspicious. I'm sure she realises you can purchase her diapers used anywhere if you'd like, why would she fear that you copy her? I don't really get it.
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Old 08-27-2004, 01:58 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks everyone for your support. I was really sick over this. She sent me a nasty email about it and everything. Of course I told her why I was buying her diaper and I hope she feels kinda dumb. Except I also had to play damaged control with Fuzzi Bunz because apparently she had a disscusion with Tereson about my so called "evil" plans.

Its too bad. I don't care what people think about me as long as they receive accurate information. SO to think someone thinks I steal plans, which I don't, is hurtful. I've had my design since before I ever could even afford to by other WAHM's diaper.

If a WAHM were to buy from me, this kind of issue would have never crossed my mind.
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Old 08-29-2004, 12:25 AM
 
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Wow, I'm really surprised. I have tons of wahm diapers and have sold to plenty of wahms as well. Guess I'm naive.

My dh believes that people who are suspicious about being screwed are that way because they've been the ones 'screwing' in the past. (pardon the language )

Same goes for liars.. if you are paranoid about being lied to, it's because you know all too much about lying yourself.

What goes around comes around... I'm so sorry that wahm was mean to you. Bad juju coming from there!

Is she a relatively new wahm?
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Old 09-01-2004, 05:48 AM
 
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I am about to start my WHAM biz. I have had the idea in the back of my mind for a while. There have been some similar or like items that I have purchased for Dylan to use. But, there is a particular product that I wanted to try and wanted to try to make by thier pattern to see how long it took to make, etc. I chose not to due to the licensing of her pattern, I was afraid that she would think I copied something of hers.

Initially I didn't think much of it until someone pointed it out to me that it could be mistaken in this way.

I am sorry that you had this experience mama! But, looking at it from the bright side -- You have learned something from this and that makes you stronger, brighter and wiser
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Old 09-11-2004, 12:21 AM
 
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nakagain-i live in az and would love to be unsuspicious with another wahm. i make dipes but don;t sell them yet. i sell other things though. i'm kinda new at all of it and crazy about dipes etc. where is the diaper party?!!
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