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can i dovorce my midwives at 39 weeks +6?

1K views 11 replies 11 participants last post by  esokitty 
#1 ·
I am so completely frustrated and heartbroken right now.

My due date is tomorrow. This is my second baby. I have been under the care of the CNMs who delivered DS1 for this entire pregnancy, which has gone much more smoothly than the last.

Last time around I had borderline high blood pressure and was put on bedrest at like 34 weeks. Because of the potential for preeclampsia, even though I had no protien in my urine or headaches/other symptoms and only borderline high blood pressure, I was induced at 40 +3. My birth was terrible - 2 days of labor, slow progression, very stressed out... and I attribute a lot of that to being evicted before he was ready.

This time my blood pressure has been awesome, I've gained a modest amount of weight, and everything is going well. However, I started measuring large around 30 weeks. I had an ultrasound for size at 32 weeks and the baby was estimated at 6 and a half lbs. They sent me again at 37 weeks and the boy was only estimated at 7 lbs give or take a lb. I was warned if the baby showed up large I might have to deliver at a different hospital with OBs instead of the MWs. However, the baby measuring at 7 lbs (which none of us believed) cleared me from this risk (or so I thought).

The midwives are all guessing 10+ lbs based on measurements and palpations. Now, personally I'm not so worried about a big baby, because DS1 was 9lbs 11 oz and basicaly snuck out in 3 pushes when the midwife went to get a sandwich. They also say they think I have the pelvis and have no doubts I can deliver a very large infant vaginally.

BUT...

Apparently the doctors they practice with are dead set against me going over my due date. They are located at a different hospital, and with the foreknowledge that this will be a huge baby, they want me to deliver there instead (if i go past my due date). The midwife on call called me today to deliver this news at 4:30 pm.

I'm at a loss. I'm considering taking castor oil tonight and letting the midwives strip my membranes in the morning, because if labor starts tomorrow I can still be at the hospital I want with the midwives. But the other half of my brain says "even though its not cervadil or pitocin, you're still forcing something that's not ready... you're going to start the cascade of interventions..."

I'm at a loss. Anyone have similar experiences/advice/commiseration??!?!?

Thanks!

~erica
 
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#2 ·
You do not have to consent to going to the other hospital. They can threaten all they want, but the law says, when you present yourself at the hospital of choice, they cannot force you to leave without your consent. (((hugs)))

And herbs work better than castor oil.
 
#3 ·
Estimations aren't necessarily accurate. I was looking forward to the 9+ pounder the midwife estimated. I ended up with a little peanut that wasn't even 7 pounds and a huge placenta.

Don't let them force you into anything.
 
#4 ·
I agree with what has been said already. Don't let them force you into anything you aren't comfortable with. "Big Baby" is NOT a reason for induction. Your MW's should support you as well. I'm sorry you are having to deal with this. Stay strong. ((HUGS)) to you.
 
#5 ·
So if you insist on going past due are your midwives going to refuse to treat you? Frankly I wouldn't do anything to get labor going other than lots of walking, lots of sex, and maybe some herbs. I have definitely heard stories of "natural" induction methods leading to the same interventions as pitocin and cervadil. What happens if you stay home until you are in labor and then show up at your hospital of choice? Will your midwives come treat you or will they leave you in the hands of the on-call dr.? If the latter is the case than just stay home as long as possible while in labor and then you won't have to deal as much with an unfamiliar doctor.
 
#7 ·
You know, if you don't feel comfortable with them, it's never too late to switch imo. They sound awfully medicalized for midwives....will this be a hospital birth? Ime, a hospital birth with a midwife was the same experience as with an OB (but I have Kaiser, so it might be different there).

Maybe find yourself a nice, crunchy homebirth midwife, or a birthing center?

, mama. You have a right to be upset.
 
#8 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Minerva View Post
Estimations aren't necessarily accurate. I was looking forward to the 9+ pounder the midwife estimated. I ended up with a little peanut that wasn't even 7 pounds and a huge placenta.

Don't let them force you into anything.
same here but reversed. My MW"s just thought I was super fat!
:
 
#9 ·
You know how is to say when a baby is to big? I dont think anyone should make you get induced because of baby being too big. A Friend of mine had a home birth and the midwife kept telling her that her baby was 9 pounds at least. Well when the baby came 3 WEEKS LATE he was only 5 pounds. Can you imagine what would have happened if they would have made her induce at 40 weeks? On the other hand a lady at our church had a 15 POUND baby. yes you read that right. I cant imagine how that is possible but she did. So who is to say big babies cant come naturally?
My home birth midwife Im going to said that she gets TONS of ladies in there 38 or 39th week of pregnancy want to transfer to her care cause of something with the hospital or CNM's so its not unusual.
 
#10 ·
You've already vaginally delivered a 9lb 11oz baby with no complications...what's the big deal? My girls were 9lbs 6oz and 11 lbs, both born at home with no complications. Both 2 weeks late.

There is no way for them to accurately estimate the size of your baby without laying him/her on a scale.

What a frustrating scenario. I'm sorry you have to deal with this right now. I just don't understand what the deal is and why the mw's would have to send you to another hospital based on assumptions.
 
#11 ·
Yes, you can leave them whenever you want. Bear in mind, they can NOT drop you at this point. You do not have to agree to an induction, but they can harass you all they want.

Personally, I would have dropped them after the first birth. From what you said, it sounds like they are practicing "defensively" rather than looking out for the best interests of you and your babe.

So, if you can get in with another HCP (or you are prepared to go UC), sure, go for it. Otherwise, I'd practice saying, "Thank you for your opinion. I'll consider that and get back to you."

Oh, and from the studies I've read, when "big" babies have more complications, they are the ones who weigh over 5000 g at birth (that's 11 lbs).

Best of luck on your birth!
 
#12 ·
So, I saw 2 of the 4 midwives today. I spoke with them at length about my disappointment, and from what they explained to me, it's all politics.

(btw, these are certified nurse midwives who practice in partnership with OBs. The OBs are at a totally different office and apparently also practice out of a different hospital)

There is a merger underway, and the policy has gotten stricter even since my son was delivered 2 years ago. The docs who are in the hospital with my mws (not from their practice) will not even cross cover for the MWs anymore, and they would have to page their "partner" docs over from the other hospital. Now anything slightly counterindicated has to be done at the other hospital.

But, the good news is, both the midwives who saw me agreed they don't think this baby is 11 or 12 lbs, probaly about the size of my first one. Although my blood pressure was slightly high in the office, they sent me up for an NST and had the pressure monitored and it was AWESEOM there, so they are comfortable giving me another week without worrying about the other hospital and docs and everythign else. I have to do a 24 hour urine and had some bloodwork drawn, so if those are off we might have to talk again, but for now I'm all set.

And this morning, I think I had a BUNCH of bloody show. So I think I'm doing good!

Still frustrated, and will be finding somewhere else to have the next baby, if I'm so blessed...
 
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