is it normal to be nervous about number 2? - Mothering Forums

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Old 04-26-2009, 11:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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i am expecting my second in two months and i am really nervous! with dd i was just nervous about giving birth, but this time i am mostly nervous about having a baby to tend to. whenever i say this to people they look at me like i am nuts and then i feel like a bad mom. i just remember the first few months being really hard and exhausting and i am nervous about how i am going to cope with the exhaustion and my 3 year old. i am already super hormonal and having a hard time being as patient as i normally am. i am scared that this is going to carry over once the babe is born. i'm getting so nervous, in fact, that it is shadowing over my excitement. which of course only makes me feel worse. does anyone else feel this way or has anyone else felt this way? is this even normal or am i missing a good parenting gene?

thanks!!
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Old 04-26-2009, 11:17 PM
 
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I was the same way! I was so worried about having another baby when my first was still a baby herself. Everything turned out alright. I now love having two and I actually think having two is easier than having one!

One Mom, Three Kids. Life is Great.

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Old 04-26-2009, 11:22 PM
 
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Totally normal. The first time around, you didn't know what having a newborn was like, but you were totally excited about the baby coming, so yo figured you'd just wing it. This time around, you have the experience of #1 to know what having a newborn is like, and all you really remember is being exhausted.

I'll say this - I read here that #2 (and subsequent children) just seemed to "fit." They fit into the family, they fit easier into your lifestyle, they just felt right. That was very comforting for me to hear, and I hope it is for you as well.

Most parents will say the switch from no children to one child was a much more difficult transition for them than the switch from 1 to 2 children. You'll be more confident, you'll have tricks up your sleeve, etc. Your experience with DC1 will help you have an easier time with DC2.

Added bonus for us: DD2 is a very different temperment/personality than DD1. She's waaaaayyyyy more easy going then her big sis!
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Old 04-27-2009, 02:10 AM
 
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Originally Posted by _betsy_ View Post
DD2 is a very different temperment/personality than DD1. She's waaaaayyyyy more easy going then her big sis!
I am soooo hoping for this. My DD is a textbook first-child, type-A, strong-willed, spirited, whatever-you-want-to-call-it personality. This kid was willful from well before she left the womb. It would be so nice to have a laid-back, go-with-the-flow kid.

OP, yeah, I think it's normal. For me, by the time our new one is born, I won't have had a baby in the house for almost 5 years. I am totally worried I have forgotten what to do! I'm sure it will all come back to me, but I remember spending the first several months of DD's life in bed most of the day, either nursing or sleeping with her. That will NOT be an option this time.

Amy loving DH 5/04, raising DD 2/05 and DS 11/09; missing my mom& my babies 6/07, 12/07; and on the side
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Old 04-27-2009, 06:46 AM
 
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this is my third and I KNOW how much work a newborn can be... I'm very nervous! (of course I try to focus on the how excited I am b/c I KNOW how cute and lovable they are too! but sometimes the worry does get me pretty freaked out. like can I do this again? (I have two refluxers in the past so that part really freaks me out!)

transtichel.gifMom of three - (2.5 yrs, 7yrs, and 11yrs). Birthing Doula, editor, and wife to my soulmate. I've had a c/s, hospital VBAC, UC and not yet decided what I'll do about this next little one

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Old 04-27-2009, 09:36 AM
 
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I'm on baby #5 and I am nervous. There have been many times already where I have stopped and thought "what the heck was I thinking". I have done it with every pregnancy.

Missi: Army wife to Tom, SAHM to Aime (11/90), Morganne (12/94), Samantha (3/05), Kassandra (6/06) and Madison (8/26/09)
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Old 04-27-2009, 09:47 AM
 
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I think I'm more nervous this time around with # 3. I remember being nervous about # 2 coming but not as nervous as I am this time around. I guess because of my age and that it's been so long since I've been pregnant. I'm so afraid I'll miss something or do something wrong.

Proud *single* mom to 3 amazing kiddos
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Old 04-27-2009, 09:50 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by notjustmamie View Post
My DD is a textbook first-child, type-A, strong-willed, spirited, whatever-you-want-to-call-it personality. This kid was willful from well before she left the womb. It would be so nice to have a laid-back, go-with-the-flow kid.
My first child was laid back, slept through the night at 6 weeks, just wonderful and super easy. I was fooled though. Everyone kept saying "they're all different" and I didn't believe them. My second was so tough from the beginning. It seemed like she was fine until 2 weeks old and at that point she turned in to a moody teenager. I wonder all the time how the next one can be since I've had both ends of the spectrum so far.

Proud *single* mom to 3 amazing kiddos
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Old 04-27-2009, 10:20 AM
 
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Yep, I'm terrified!
And my son is considered very easygoing! The newborn stage was just so tough for me mentally.
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Old 04-27-2009, 11:47 AM - Thread Starter
 
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this makes me feel soooo much better! i was beginning to think there was something wrong with me!
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Old 04-27-2009, 12:27 PM
 
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I think thats totally normal to feel that way. I remember having to psych myself up telling myself, Its only 6 weeks, then it gets easier. Its such a short time, it doesn't last forever. This is my 8th and the nb stage doesn't really bother me anymore. Of course I have to get to that point. Right now I am so scared of labor I think I might need someone to knock me out. I think I would rather go back to worrying about having a nb lol.

Expecting #9.  Always busy hsing.
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