my inlaws are total hippies!
my MIL had a planned UC with my husband and used the same midwife i am using for my SIL. they are into organic foods and natural medicine and they make bags to sell at ren fests, and have been doing this for 22 years! they are cool people. MIL is so happy i am using her midwife and i invited her to be a labor support/doula for me. oh and sometimes (like last night) DS and DSS spend the night at their house and they all sleep in one bed, so its just like home for them!
my mom is ANOTHER story alltogether!
lets see where to start....
she did nuse me , she says for over a year, dont know how true that is. i never felt attached to her, she was pretty verbally abusive. she has worked as an RN in labor and delivery for all my life, but in the past 5 years got promoted. now she is in charge of the "watch child" system in all the hospitals in Austin. watchchild is the computer system that manages all the fetal monitoring. yuck
she also teaches childbirth classes, IMO from a completly hospital point of view...
when i got pregnant with DS i suggested HB and she told me no way (living in her home) and told me horror stories to convince me DS or I would die if we did one.
when i was in labor she never called my midwife (i was busy LABORING..lol) so she could basically be in charge..and after hours of nurses and her suggesting i get an epidural i did. then when DS was born i was speachless and crying and so badly wanted everything silent, and here she is over my shoulder saying" oh my baby, my baby" --set the tone for later as youll see--
totally rained on my parade...
while i lived with her she constantly told me how to hold him how to do this how to do that...a constant stream of directions...very annoying. i moved out when he was 6 months old and finally slowly got into being a mother for myself and making my own choices. when i decided to stop his vaccines (right before his 12 month) she flipped out on me and a couple of months later told me she thought i was a horrible mother....anyhow the next day CPS was at my door. she had reported me- for no vaxing (they said big deal), for not feeding him (my fridge was full of organic food), beating him (had never laid a hand on him ,sheesh!), for breastfeeding him and doing exstacy (no IDEA where that came from
anyhow i had to deal with all these stupid accusations and after they closed the case the worked told me it was my mom who reported me..duh!
well that was almost 2 years ago AND I STILL HAVE NOT SPOKEN TO HER. she thought she had control over me because the title to my car was in her name, though i was paying for it. so she reported it stolen and i had to give it up...but i found a way to buy another car and lost the 3 K I'd already put into my old one...
she trys all the time to get ahold of me through my family and friends and she is all apolgetic, but never apologizes for calling CPS...she didnt see me get married, and she's never met DH or DSS...
her reasoning for calling CPS was she thought they would give kiryn to her if they took him from me..she is nuts....she wants control of me and since she cant have that she wants to have him. i have had nightmares for 2 years about her taking kiryn from me.
now usually, because i am afraid of her and because i have no sympathy for her, i have no motivation to talk to her...but being pregnant is skrewing with me!! i am actually considering going and talking to her! i wouldnt let her see my kids or give her any info about me as far as where i live ect (dont want another CPS visit!) but i feel like tlkaing to her..but at the same time it makes me feel like throwing up when i think about it....i also would want to do this after DD is born because im not gogin to want to leave her while i go, nor will i want to take her, KWIM?
what do you ladies think?