|View Poll Results: Belly rubbing for me when I am pregnant...well...|
|I HATE it - you will die if you touch my belly! Grrrr!||50||32.68%|
|I LOVE it! - So wonderful! Rub away! Oh - can you feel this wonderful life inside of me?!||30||19.61%|
|Neither hate or love it. Really depends on my hormones at the time!||55||35.95%|
|other - just to be difficult||18||11.76%|
|Voters: 153. You may not vote on this poll|
I never had this with my DS. I felt I was missing out on something. Was there something wrong with me? Not even the random stranger!?!...lol
I got my first belly rub yesterday though from a close friend. It was brief and unasked for - but I loved it. I made me feel so special and loved and the little life inside of me loved too! I can not help but think 'what an intimate and wonderful thing to share!'
Yeah - I can undrestand complete strangers rubbing your belly is just a bit freaky...but heck, if they rub anything on you (any type of body contact) it can be rather freaky!...So I am not refering to random complete strangers in my poll....
But I cant be the only one who loves this? lol
I had a stranger sort of befriend me off of Freecycle. Our husbands were both in the military. She came to get something free from my house and saw I was pregnant and was so weird. We talked for like 10 minutes and then she turned to leave, and then turned back around and asked if she could give me a hug. I said yes, and after she hugged me, she said "I just love hugging pregnant women".
It was WEIRD to say the least.
And then the cultural context - some cultures touch a lot, others very little. And that can vary within countries, so Americans from one part of the country may find the norms for touching are different elsewhere, or within a different ethnic group.
I think usually it is best to remember that whatever group you belong to that others are not trying to be offensive or weird, they likely just have a different background or inclinations. And of course people from really different cultural backgrounds who are visitors may not easily pick up on our social signals about our preferences.
Second, when I got bigger it happened really fast. My tummy was SO SENSITIVE that the skin would hurt if anything touched it. I had to be careful about what kind of material my clothes were made out of because of this. So, people rubbing it was like torture.
But strangers? Wanting to TOUCH me? Anywhere? Not OK in my book.
Boys: 12/94, 1/99, 11/03, 6/11. Girls: 11/06, 10/09, 12/12
i voted depends, and not just to be difficult - it's complicated!
however, i do not enjoy having my personal space invaded, and i would only feel comfortable if it was someone i know and love, AND who asked first.
kids are an exception, whether they know me or not.
also, at this stage when i barely feel pregnant in an outward way, it would be very awkward. later, when there's baby there to share, it will feel different i think.
me+him for 15 yrs, welcomed our little one march 25th, 2010.
My oldest child drive me a little crazy with the belly rubs, because it's not just that she'll touch my belly if we happen to be near, but I'll be walking from point A to point B, or trying to get dressed, or just otherwise doing something else, and she expected me to just stop everything I'm doing, so she can take her time and rub my belly, and talk to the baby. Can we limit this to when we're sitting on the couch together or something? Do I really have to stop going where I'm going and just stand here? So yes, I've taken to shooing her away sometimes. It's funny, her dad is the same way about hugs, and always has been. I'll be walking from one room to another, with things in my hand, and he'll get in my way and stop me, so we can have a leisurely hug, just standing there, holding each other. I like that and all, but seriously, I was on my way somewhere. I'm holding stuff. This isn't the moment to just sway and hug.
Gillian - Wife to an amazing DH, Mother to 5 wonderful kiddos.
The rubs that I've gotten didn't bother me, but I also don't mine shoulder pats, arm taps, and other physical contact when talking to people (friends, family, acquaintances, people I just met on the bus).
Becky, sahm to 25/04/2000 Chloe 12/04/2002 Cameron 19/02/2004 Caitlin 28/06/2005 24/07/2006 and Caden 14/03/2008
19.05.2012 18.08.2012 24.05.2013 25.6.2013 04.09.2014
I am fine with my Ds and my nephews touching my belly. I cannot stand it when my fiance, or any other family touching it but children are fine. I am very much into personal space as a PP said when I become pregnant (maybe it is my mama bear creeping in ) I will not even know I am pregnant yet and I have the strange do not come near me feeling! It someone just lays their hand on my belly for a few moments I am fine but a rub or laying their hand there for more than a few moments not happening! I actually feel bad because I know stbdh would LOVE to not feel bad touching my belly I let him as I know it makes him feel as though he is bonding but I cringe inside
Glenn 11*09 Joe 4*04 Me & Hubby
The only people I like touching me is my dh and my children. Anyone else needs to respect my personal space and back off. So yeah, I hate it from strangers and family (outside of my own little one) alike. Touch me and die, LOL.
I don't mind if DH touches me... but no one else. My mother is already rubbing (I'm 9 wks- only chub so far) and it drives me nuts. I know friends and strangers doing it once I start to grow a real belly will irk me too
In this pregnancy so far, often I don't really want to be touched by my husband, so I think it boils down to just not wanting to be touched at all. It's probably because of the nausea. I don't like to be touched when I'm sick either.
DS1 Dec 2009 DZ Twins July 2012
While pregnant, I am a lot less tolerant of touch period, and I don't like ANYONE rubbing my stomach. Not friends, not family, nobody. This is partially because, yes, right now my stomach is mostly just flabbiness-- but even when it gets bigger and more "toned" seeming, I view the belly-rubbing as just one more way that society stops viewing mothers as personal agents and more as just... vessels, or something. I mean, if a stranger (or even a friend/family member) came up to me non-pregnant and rubbed my stomach? Totally inappropriate and weird. Pregnant, and it just seems "cute" to people If Dh just walks by and pats me as says, "How's the baby?" then that's great and cute-- but the guys you see on baby story sometimes who spend the whole OB appt or lamaze class or whatever just rubbing and rubbing and rubbing the wife's stomach? Not cool with me at all.
Now, once baby is kicking, I certainly expect that my mother/sister/etc will want to feel some kicking, which (though, still, I find it weird!) I don't mind if they ask.
Oh-- one exception. I don't mind children touching my stomach at all. DD I don't mind (of course!) but a little boy on the playground reached up and patted me when he heard me say I had a baby in there, and that just seemed cute.
So thankful for our healthy baby boy, born Easter morning, 2010!
Belly rubbing has no relevance to me at all. I don't think anything of it when it happens and it certainly doesn't dwell on my mind.
It's clearly a personal space issue for those that hate. Some people don't want to be touched by others. No biggie. For me, if it makes you happy to touch my pregnant belly then go right ahead. I really don't care.
Whew, sorry I guess I needed to vent.
Wife to J. Mama to DD(9yo) & DS(6yo).
Jenni Wife to Jason and Mommy to Enza 9/08 and Grayson 1/11
With this pregnancy I am sure to proudly display my growing belly. I don't mind lingering stares, instead I greet them with a smile! So far only one touch from a co-worker which was unexpected, but comforting...
Just remember that many women (and men) have been touched by loss and are jealous of your growing bump. Sometimes a touch is the only thing they have to connect them to the little one that they have lost.
The funny thing is, I'm generally an especially touchy-feely type person, but I get picky about who touches me and how when I'm pregnant.
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