Question for moms of many who get morning sickness - Mothering Forums
I'm Pregnant > Question for moms of many who get morning sickness
JessieBird's Avatar JessieBird 04:35 PM 03-22-2010
This may be a weird question but - how do you do it? I have always wanted lots of kiddos and so does my DH. We're getting older (I'm 36, he's 43) so it's unlikely that we'll have the big brood we'd originally pictured for that reason but now that I'm on my second pregnancy with horrible morning sickness, I feel like I couldn't deal with being pregnant often anyway, even if I was younger. I'm really sad about that, like I'm not strong enough for this even though it's temporary and I love being a mom and all that... When I spend the entire weekend lying on the counch dry heaving and ignoring my adorable wonderful little 15 mo DS, I feel so pathetic and incapable and I sometimes even regret getting pregnant again. I know we forget all about it once our babies are here, but still IT'S BRUTAL and I don't know how you do it over and over again. Gotta go puke, please discuss in my absence...

bananabee's Avatar bananabee 05:13 PM 03-22-2010
I took Zofran and liquid Reglan (b/c insurance had a hard time paying for Zofran). Otherwise I wouldn't have been able to eat or keep liquids down, and since I was already underweight and had an upcoming surgery, I couldn't afford to lose weight. I think I'll do that again w/next pregnancy if I need to, because I'm going to need to be able to function with a toddler around and I can't function if I don't eat.
BetsyS's Avatar BetsyS 05:23 PM 03-22-2010
I'm on #3. For me, this pregnancy was the easiest of them all--I've only thrown up 5 or 6 times (and I'm 26 weeks).

For us, the first trimester is a blur of peanut butter sandwiches (for my toddlers), lots of PBS kids while I lay on the couch, the bare minimum of housework, switching to sposie diapers for a while, and just surviving.
MaerynPearl's Avatar MaerynPearl 05:30 PM 03-22-2010
My first (my loss) was probably hg but the doctor wouldn't see me until 12 weeks so I just sort of put up with it... of course it did not last as long as the other two because it ended up being a loss at 13 weeks.

My second was diagnosed hg, I took Reglan. Vitamin B failed me, ginger failed me, lemon failed me... no natural cures cured me so we had to turn to prescription. Even with the Reglan it was so bad towards the end of the hg that I was nearly hospitalized.

My third probably was hg but never diagnosed, never took anything. I did find some days I just plain wouldnt be sick (still nauseous but not vomiting) and others I was very much sick (could not keep anything down)...

My fourth (current) has been comparatively mild. Shockingly so... to most women what this pregnancy has been would be considered very bad morning sickness (some days unable to eat, vomiting a few times per day...) but it wasnt HG and I have really been able to handle it well. Granted I lost 11 pounds in the first trimester... I was able to get healthy foods in and still function as a normal person... plus it was only about 3 or 4 weeks worth of sickness rather than the months it was with the others...

I fully hope that the next one follows this trend and actually gets easier yet. I think, perhaps, that the more pregnancies my body goes through maybe the more my body becomes accustomed to whatever it is that causes the HG to begin with.

But yeah... why still have more kids when I was already nearly hospitalized with my first son? Well... there is a LOT more to pregnancy/being a mother than those first few months and to me its worth the suffering. Plus, as you said... we have a bit of amnesia about the first several months once we get to feeling kicks and then holding that adorable little bundle of cute softness.
sanguine_speed's Avatar sanguine_speed 05:34 PM 03-22-2010
I have asked myself the same question, and here I am with my fourth. In addition to nausea and vomiting however, I am SO TIRED and SO SORE. I don't know how I could have more children. The more children I have, the more tired and sore I become, probably for having to take care of the others. I have had to keep daycare for my toddler even when I left work early for pain and illness and exhaustion. I don't know how others do it.
MyFillingQuiver's Avatar MyFillingQuiver 07:27 PM 03-22-2010
I've been fortunate than in most of my pregnancies, I haven't been terribly ill. The first I was, and I've had "green ness" with others. This pregnancy has been my most green, but we got through!

I think having realistic expectations, having support, and for me-relying on my faith that God never leaves, and He loves me and this baby, really helps. We are open to life, so that means whenever they may come in our lives. I was EBF when I got pregnant with this baby-our last baby was 6.5 months.

The children who are old enough (4 and up) all have daily chores. The remaining work to be done in the household I structure for times when I'm feeling the best. I try to get enough rest, and I drink whey protein shakes daily, which REALLY help feeling sick.

It's a lifestyle to have a large family. During m/s, I still cook and clean and homeschool, but with more flexibility and understanding from the family. It's definitely a trial, but short lived and incredibly worth it.

Blessings, and hope you are feeling better soon.
Tiffanoodle's Avatar Tiffanoodle 09:30 PM 03-22-2010
Side note: I've always wondered when you're considered a "mom of many"

I get fairly miserable m/s. Probably not as bad as most, though. I do throw up most of what I eat, occasionally at other times, and I have NO energy. For at least 14 weeks. I spaced my first 3 apart quite a bit, so they didn't need quite as much from me. This time, they're closer than I would have liked, but even at her age, my youngest (will be just barely 2 when baby's born) is able to do more than I probably would expect of her otherwise.

My dh knows that I get very sick and I have absolutely no energy through pregnancy. He made the comment the other day that he knows pregnancy kicks my butt and he's fine with stepping in to help out more than usual. For me, that's been key to getting through. Help from him, chore charts, and lowering my housekeeping standards a bit in the first few months.
sioleabha's Avatar sioleabha 09:55 PM 03-22-2010
I'm almost 7 weeks into pregnancy #6. (Keep in mind that I had two toddlers already when I got pregnant the first time, since my husband was a package deal.) For my first five pregnancies, I got horrible morning sickness for the entire first trimester, and then heartburn that was just as bad during the third. I was exhausted the whole pregnancy every time.

My solution was that I was not having any more kids, darn it. That's just enough of that! Well, the best laid plans and all... this is "oops" baby number two. And we were careful. Sigh.

At that point, you just have to grin and bear it, and do the best you can. Don't expect to be supermom. Lay on the couch with your toddler and snuggle. Drink lots of water or Sprite and eat crackers, and share them with your little boy. Buy paper plates if you have to, serve sandwiches and cold cereal, and reserve your energy for maybe reading your son's favorite book instead of cleaning the house.

And remember that just because you get terrible morning sickness one pregnancy, doesn't mean you will next time. I've been shocked that I felt sick to my stomach for about a week this time, and now I seem to be fine! I only threw up ONCE, and barely that. It's a miracle!
Funny Face's Avatar Funny Face 10:03 PM 03-22-2010
I've always wondered this too. It has seriously colored how I feel about possibly being pregnant with two kids to take care of. Dd was an easy, independent child but ds is an adventurer and extremely attached. He'd level the house in half an hour flat if I did what I had to do to survive during my last pregnancy.

Maybe it always boils down to 'if you want it, you make it work'?
etsdtm99's Avatar etsdtm99 12:07 AM 03-23-2010
I am on #3.. past the m/s part now .. I sat on the couch, watched q lot of tv , ate a lot of take out and frozen food .. It only lasted about 8 weeks and while that sounds really horrible and it was , I am doing much better now so much so that I feel normal even though I know I'm not.. Also it was better this time, I have only thrown up twice this time but the nausea was way worse .. My dh helped a lot in the evening
newmommy7-08's Avatar newmommy7-08 07:12 AM 03-23-2010
This is my second pregnancy, (#2 and #3 children) It's 5am and i just woke DH to go and get me cold water, because that sometimes helps. I also told him to remind me in a few years that I hate pregnancy and don't EVER want to do it again...

I'm into the 19th week and MS still going strong. Zofran has gotten me through. I tried all the natural remedies I could and nothing helped. Deciding to take meds was the difference between caring for my toddler for the last almost 4 months or not. Morning sickness starts for me around 7 weeks that magical time when the placenta is being created and all the books say if you don't have it by then you're good to go cause the placenta starts to take over for the extra hormones... yeah right. W/ DS I had MS until week 17... this time who knows when it's going to end. I'll be happy if it's gone when I deliver. My midwife was hopeful that last week when I only threw up once it was just an oddity since I had actually been good while I was sick for the previous almost 3 weeks. This week, I've had issues Sun, Mon, now Tues... it's baaaack lol. (At this point it's either find a way to laugh... or cry) I hope things start getting better for you soon! I hate to think of anyone else going through this!
corysmilk's Avatar corysmilk 04:36 PM 03-23-2010
I had extremly horrable ms with # 3. several times a day until about 20 weeks then once a day, even the day I had him. I only gained 9 pounds the whole preg.
With this one I seem fine so far a little quesy, especally driving, more like a motion sickness.
I have been eating small healthy snacks every 2 hours or so, and trying to not eat Big meals... its working so far Lol, I m 5 weeks.
I totally get the feeling of umm yeah remind me I hate this, cause I felt so sick 2 days ago. I thought to myself" I wanted this"

i had lost preg. # 3 at 13 weeks, and I knew because the sick feeling started to go away, plus other stuff. during my pg with my youngest the ms was in strange way my comfort that everything was fine....... may sound weird.

this will past, I know it sucks. but just do what you can everyday, be gentle with yourself don't beat your self up with negative self talk.
BumkinsMum 05:20 PM 03-23-2010
I've never had extreme M.S. Sick-Yes. Nausea-Yes. Tired-Yes. but never anything that I couldn't get through. I pretty much stay home until I'm 12 weeks if I can.

Things that have helped me this time around;

Phosphozyme or Squirt.
Ginger candy
Mint Gum
and eating PROTIEN every 2-3 hours

I love being pregnant, I enjoy every day of it, and when I'm too tired to do anything other then nap, I do! I just think how hard my body is working to make this little blessing inside me. For something so amazing of course it's going to take some work It's all worth it in the end I think

Hang in there Mama's! We'll all make it through
KBinSATX's Avatar KBinSATX 05:27 PM 03-23-2010
When I felt sick during pregnancy I was really glad that I ahd decided to tandem nurse. At least it allowed me to sit on the couch, cradle the toddler and nurse him. Other forms of parenting would have taken much more effort...
Aka mommy's Avatar Aka mommy 05:41 PM 03-23-2010
I honestly don't know how other's do it and this time I keep kicking myself even though this was not an intentional pregnancy. DD#1 was SEVERE hospitalizing HG. It was bad, and i threw up all the way until 4 hours after delivery. I swore i'd never have another and begged my ob for a tubal. She refused, because i was only 23 and only had one child.

Somehow, it all faded in my memory. DD turned 14 months old and dh begged me to think about having a 2nd, so our oldest wouldnt be an only. We had always wanted a large family, or at the very least 4 kids. He was just begging for 2, after seeing how hard my pregnancy was and was hopeful it wouldn't happen again. Lightening doesn't strike twice, right? Well I gave him a month and in that month dd#2 was conceived.

Thankfully my HG only lasted 16 weeks. But the misery of doing that while trying to care for a toddler was hard. I felt like a horrible parent and swore i'd never do that again. Then when the hg passed it's like a fog and you forget just how bad it was! I want to note zofran and rx meds never helped with my HG.

Somehow 2 years later I decided to become a surrogate. I had my hands full with the girls and secretly blamed dh's genes for my horrible HG. And off i went, and this time not a drop of HG. Only about 4 days of morning sickness and my easiest pregnancy of all. I convinced myself my body had grown use to the pregnancy hormones and we could eventually try for our own 3rd and 4th the year after I gave birth.

Well 4 months after giving birth dh came home for a visit (had been gone with the Army) and somehow we conceived without meaning to, long story i had ovulated over a week previously! I was excited, until the morning sickness hit at 6 weeks. Then i wondered what the heck i'd gotten myself into. I'm 30 weeks and the constant numerous vomitting has stopped about 4 weeks ago. But i still am queesy through most the day and will throw up if i drink any water before 2 pm. It really sucks. DH has sworn he is never putting me through this ever again, especially now that he's in the military and deployments are always a possibility. He wants to go get snipped, and i am in agreement purely out of misery.

But a small part of me really wants #4, and i doubt we'll ever be able to afford adoption. But i am mourning that this is my last pregnancy and im miserable. My children daily ask when the baby is going to come so i wont be so sick anymore which makes me feel like an awful mother. So i guess for me it comes down to fulfilling a desire to have a family with 4 kids and making myself and my children suffer or putting aside that desire and making sure the children i already have are ok. It's a hard call because i feel a big family is soooo beneficial to children (i grew up with 5 sisters and its amazing now that we are grown). I often watch large families with a bit of envy, not in a bad way. It's something i want. So for now dh and I have been trying to figure out if adoption is a real possibility for us eventually.

Sorry im no help as you can see lol
JessieBird's Avatar JessieBird 08:45 PM 03-23-2010
Originally Posted by Aka mommy View Post
My children daily ask when the baby is going to come so i wont be so sick anymore.
Okay this just made me burst into tears!

Thanks for all the honesty and the glimmers of inspiration too. The last few days have been so hard. Two weeks ago I was hospitalized for 5 days for HG (though it got a bit better all of a sudden so there may have been a gastro bug at work too) and I've been just hanging on ever since. With DS, I rarely actually vomited (unlike this time where everything is coming up but generally I feel I bit better) but the nausea was so bad that I was almost unable to function at all for 25 weeks. I'm so scared that it will last that long this time too. Once again, I am swearing that I will never EVER get pregnant again and that thought alone is so painful.

Ugs...thanks for the support. Glad I'm not alone in this craziness.
Aka mommy's Avatar Aka mommy 10:02 PM 03-23-2010
Originally Posted by JessieBird View Post
Okay this just made me burst into tears!

Thanks for all the honesty and the glimmers of inspiration too. The last few days have been so hard. Two weeks ago I was hospitalized for 5 days for HG (though it got a bit better all of a sudden so there may have been a gastro bug at work too) and I've been just hanging on ever since. With DS, I rarely actually vomited (unlike this time where everything is coming up but generally I feel I bit better) but the nausea was so bad that I was almost unable to function at all for 25 weeks. I'm so scared that it will last that long this time too. Once again, I am swearing that I will never EVER get pregnant again and that thought alone is so painful.

Ugs...thanks for the support. Glad I'm not alone in this craziness.
I am so sorry and know that i'm empathetically hugging you.

It's hard, but on the good days i'm able to focus on the getting my girls' excited about being big sisters. And i pray i havent scarred them for life and hopefully they arent fearful to have their own children one day.

I really wish there was more research on HG, but there is not much. Have you checked out ? I found it to be reassuring, often times most women don't realize how serious it is or that its not simply morning sickness. And no one in my life had ever experienced it before. There is a forum and Her Community that includes stories of other survivors. Maybe it would be helpful to have that support to get you through. And feel free to PM me. A simple 'I understand and acknowledge how miserable you are and am sending you healing thoughts' sometimes is all one wants to hear. Lots of hugs mama, you can do this!
bri276's Avatar bri276 11:50 PM 03-23-2010
Good question and thread. I don't think I'm going to be able to have #3 until the first two are old enough to take care of themselves- if I'm even able to, by then. I was physically incapable of caring for DD many days in the first 9 weeks of this pregnancy. Like, if people hadn't come over to help, which thank God they did, DH would have had to take FMLA or DD would have to go stay with grandparents for a couple weeks. I was unable to stand up and walk from one room to another at some points. I just don't know if I can ever, ever risk doing this again.
taralv's Avatar taralv 11:29 AM 03-24-2010
I really appreciate this thread! I am pregnant with #4, and I have had really awful morning sickness each time. With #3 I had to go to the hospital for fluids, and they prescribed Zofran which did help me keep food/fluid down until 22 weeks along when I was able to go off of it. This time I do need Zofran as well, but I am hoping to be able to stop using it sooner as the side effects are truly miserable. So, it is hard for me to think of being pregnant again, but for spiritual/philosophical reasons, I really do want to be open to having as many children as I am meant to have. I find that I have a long period of infertility while nursing (2 years on average), and I am alread 36 yrs old, so I don't see me having 19 kids, but 1 or 2 more are possible. Having said that... I rely so much on my oldest daughter to help right now (she is almost 9), and I feel guilty about that. It seems like all day long I am asking her to please bring me this or that or fix her brother or sister snacks, etc... She is a very helpful child by nature, and she likes to be a "little mother" but this first trimester has been so hard on her. My husband has been helping much more than usual, due to necessity. I finally decided that even if he complains when I ask him to change a diaper, he still does it and that's fine with me. He has also helped so much at night with my 2 year old who co-sleeps as I have had to night wean because I am so, so sick at night. In any case, we are just getting through day by day. I try not to think of how long I have left to feel like this. I also try to remind myself that while some days are awful, I sometimes have little moments of "okayness", and I try to enjoy those as much as possible. Oh, and we also invested in a small set of swings for our backyard, so that (along with the sandbox) has helped immensely on days when it's nice but I can't get off of the couch. Okay, I hope this helped a little. I know that I sometimes feel SO alone, being so sick and having to care for young children... it's easy to get sucked into self-pity. But when I read about other mothers doing the same thing and getting through it, it just helps so much.