Any good comebacks for rude remarks? - Mothering Forums

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Old 04-13-2010, 10:41 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm heading in to my ultrasound here in about 40 minutes and we've decided to find out the gender. I've already got 2 boys, so if it's another boy I want to be prepared for the "Aw, that's too bad, are you going to try again for a girl?" comments, or the "Oh, you got your girl, now you can stop!" comments if it's a girl. Any good ones out there?

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Old 04-13-2010, 11:18 AM
 
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Man, I was really hoping for puppies.
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Old 04-13-2010, 11:44 AM
 
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UGGG I also have two boys and have NOT found out on this baby yet (due in a few weeks)

It is very tedious, I am convinced that people have no idea what to say so they just say anything. My Aunt said I needed a girl to do 'girl chores' what ever that is. I never did girl chores, I just did chores-- for gosh sakes!.... and she knows I have femminist leanings even????

Anyway, do you want really mean stuff or just clever? Shock and awe seems to confuse people, tell them you are having boy and girl twins and then say 'just kidding, or not' and watch their face contort as they try to figure it out.

"I want them to dress up as the three stooges" or musketters or something if you have three boys......

Mostly I just get annoyed and tell them if does not matter to me- a child is a child and both my boys are not alike, they are very different people.
HAve fun with that!
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Old 04-13-2010, 11:47 AM
 
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DFs mother told me her reaction was always: Its a baby. Does it MATTER if its a boy or a girl?

(she had three boys, no girls)

Artist, photographer, stay-at-home-mom and Marine wife. Mom to 4; a boy and three little girls.
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Old 04-13-2010, 11:50 AM
 
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We found out we are having our third girl. My DH is a pretty manly man...big outdoorsman, played semi-pro ball and is total jock....everyone that knows us assumes he is just trying over and over for a boy, which irritates me to No End.

SO when people ask, and I say...we are having girl #3! and they kind of give a sad "awwwww", like bummer....I usually either go with "we are so stoked...were really hoping it was a girl!" and then they feel stupid. Or just have no reply.
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Old 04-13-2010, 12:35 PM
 
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Here's a good way to confuse people...

Have a girl after having two boys... and then get pregnant again. People will be scratching their heads, wondering why you would do that. You already got your girl... why get pregnant again??

When folks give me comments about the sex of the baby I always say, "The Lord planned this particular child before time began. I'm sure He has a good reason why it's a boy/girl.".

Catholic homeschooling mom of two daughters and four sons... baby Mark born on 8/27/10. Kidney Disease Awareness
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Old 04-13-2010, 12:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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First off, t's a BOY!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ellen Griswold View Post
Man, I was really hoping for puppies.
I like that. "Aw, are you gonna try again for a girl?" "No, next time I'm trying for a puppy!"

Quote:
Originally Posted by briome View Post
Anyway, do you want really mean stuff or just clever?
I'm open to mean

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Old 04-13-2010, 12:51 PM
 
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Congrats! You are now two boys away from your own boy band

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Old 04-13-2010, 01:09 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Lauren31 View Post
Congrats! You are now two boys away from your own boy band
SWEET! Now I have a mission in life!

ETA: I used that on Facebook. Totally confused some people

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Old 04-13-2010, 01:15 PM
 
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Totally lurking but subbing to this thread. lol.
Puppies! rofl!

Mom to angel baby, grew wings at 5 weeks in May '07, William, born Dec '08, and another angel who grew wings at 8w4d (lost at 11w) in Oct '10. Rachel born Feb 2012, Another angel Lost Sept '13. New bean due Nov '14!
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Old 04-13-2010, 01:23 PM
 
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My one-size-fits-all response to rude remarks lately has been:

"HUH?"

Puts it right back on them without you having to be clever or even really rude.

I haven't used this one yet but another possibility: "Did you mean to say that??"

Homeschooling mama to 6 year old DD.

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Old 04-13-2010, 01:30 PM
 
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Response to "Oh, that's too bad"...
"what? that I've been blessed with 3 healty beautiful boys? When did that become a BAD thing?"

Response number 2 when people thought we were having a boy but we suspected girl.."my son just decided to have a vagina instead"
Yours-"Oh your having another boy" "oh no its a girl that decided to be born with a penis"

mommy daddy son daughter = our family
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Old 04-13-2010, 01:44 PM
 
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"Yeah, maybe we should just abort, is (however many) weeks too late to abort it for having a penis?"

"Actually i like boys. That's WHY we keep having them." (and look at them like they are complete idiots).

If your older kids are there (i hate it when people are THAT tactless) you could say "do you know you said that out loud and my TWO SONS can hear you?"

We decided not to find out, for a lot of reasons (not having a scan late enough to be very reliable being one) and when people want to know i generally just say i'm not sure, but i did have one crazy exchange whereby a woman asked what it was, i said i don't know, she said did we not want to find out, i said we didn't mind either way, she said but which would i prefer, i said i really didn't care, she said well, but if you COULD choose what would you want, i said really i didn't care at all, she said but i MUST have some preference and i finally snapped and said "Look, i have had FOUR miscarriages, this one can have 2 heads, if it makes it to my arms i'll be grateful, ok?" and she scuttled off back under her rock.
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Old 04-13-2010, 02:17 PM
 
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I know that this will soon start up with us as well as its becming somewhat obvious that im pg...well at least thats what I tell myself perhaps they just think im getting fat

we have all boys...yes the dreaded all boys Considering all my losses and problems im so eternally grateful that I have any children that if God saw fit to give me a two headed green alien baby I'd gladly take it.

We have already gotten the "hoping for a girl?" comments and yes I would love to parent a girl ias long as my child is healthy I could care less. I think some people just see our family and assume were still trying for a almighty girl child, they might be confused if we decide to have another if this is a girl.
in fact I always envisioned a large boy family. I think DH and I have decided to find out the sex but have decided to keep it secret from friends and family for that very reason...we dont want the "pity" comments if its a boy or the "your done!" comments if its a girl. We figure that our family will be too in love when they see the baby they wont care wht the sex is at that point.
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Old 04-13-2010, 03:22 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DeChRi View Post
We found out we are having our third girl. My DH is a pretty manly man...big outdoorsman, played semi-pro ball and is total jock....everyone that knows us assumes he is just trying over and over for a boy, which irritates me to No End.

SO when people ask, and I say...we are having girl #3! and they kind of give a sad "awwwww", like bummer....I usually either go with "we are so stoked...were really hoping it was a girl!" and then they feel stupid. Or just have no reply.
Similar to this, after having my third daughter, when people would ask if we were going to try again for a boy, my standard response was "No, but we might try again for another girl!" No one ever knows what to say to that.

Sabra: Mama to Bobbie (3/02), Linda (1/04), Esther (10/05), Marie (11/10), & Douglas (11/12)

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Old 04-13-2010, 04:51 PM
 
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I'm surprised that I haven't really gotten any comments about having a second girl. Most people are pretty tactful and say "are you excited?" I guess that's fishing for a complaint, but I just say "heck yeah! I get to reuse all of DD's stuff!" Sometimes I'll throw in, "if we'd had a boy, though, he'd probably just be wearing a lot of pink."

Amy (34): mommy to DD1 (11/07) and DD2 (7/10), wife, wohm, and wannabe suburban homesteader.
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Old 04-13-2010, 05:26 PM
 
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We have one boy and one girl. I got several comments about now having the "perfect" family and we must be done.

I usually looked at them and asked how the presence or absence of a penis would make my child more or less perfect.

Mom to DS 4/24/03 and DD 4/17/06
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Old 04-13-2010, 05:39 PM
 
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I am so here with you, except on the opposite side. We have two girls. Baby #3 will make an appearance at any moment. We don't know the sex but we have been bombarded with "it has to be a boy" comments. It is driving me crazy! People are so consumed with what is between the baby's legs and that is it. I am secretly almost hoping that this baby is another girl, just to show them that we would be thrilled with another girl. My friends and I attend dinner together twice a month to catch up etc. and I finally had to get pretty snarky with them to get them to shut up about this baby being a boy. I was so tired of hearing: "your DH NEEDS a boy," "you are carrying like you have a boy attached to you," "you need some testosterone in that estrogen filled house of yours," and on and on. My mom who also attends dinner with us actually pulled the other ladies aside and said we are not going to badger Lisa anymore about the sex of the baby, if you want to ask her about the pregnancy or how she is feeling that is fine but quit harping on the sex.
Then at my baby shower one of the ladies actually had the nerve to write on her card to me, "your baby is a boy." WHAT?

Lisa
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Old 04-13-2010, 05:48 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lauren31 View Post
Congrats! You are now two boys away from your own boy band
Since they are brothers, you only need 3! (Hanson, Jonas Brothers, etc.)

Artist, photographer, stay-at-home-mom and Marine wife. Mom to 4; a boy and three little girls.
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Old 04-13-2010, 06:07 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Georgetown HB Mom View Post
I am secretly almost hoping that this baby is another girl, just to show them that we would be thrilled with another girl.
I know exactly how you feel, I had absolutely no preference as to boy or girl, but now I'm kinda glad it's a boy because I know it'll drive my MIL crazy. She actually refused to discuss boy names with me during my last pregnancy because "we don't want a boy!"

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Old 04-13-2010, 07:51 PM
 
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My MIL is from India, and has a strong preference for having a boy. Each of my previous 2 pg she would pat my tummy and say "my grandson." Then, of course, we had a girl each time.

We told her about this pregnancy last night. Even knowing how she feels about having a boy, I've been trying to keep my preferences neutral. She was happy, then starting saying she knows it's a boy. I reminded her that's what she said twice before. Then she said she was praying to God for a boy.

OK, that's it. I can't take it. I will love this child if it's a boy, but I am officially declaring my wish for another girl. It really ticks me off that my amazing, wonderful girls are not good enough. Plus, I'm super afraid that a grandson will get preferential treatment.

I'm also dreading comments from people that we're having a 3rd to try for a boy.

Jen, mom to DD1 10/01; DD2 6/05; DS 11/10; and 2 older cat.gif
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Old 04-13-2010, 10:40 PM
 
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Well, after my first was a girl and my second was a boy, I would say to the "you have one of each you must be done", "Oh, no. Now we have our boy room and our girl room and we'll just keep shoveling 'em in. "

You could say, "What would *I* do with a girl?" with a confused look on your face.

I've been getting the evil eye now that I'm slowly becoming more obviously pg with our fourth. Yes, we know what causes this. And YES IT WAS ON PURPOSE.

It's a good thing dh hasn't been privy to those sorts of comments. He gets very, very mad at people's lack of propriety.

"If you keep doing the same things you've always done, you'll keep getting the same results you've always gotten."

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Old 04-13-2010, 10:58 PM
 
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You guys have given me some good responses too. I just can't believe how many people feel the need to give input on the sex of this baby.

Mama to three sweet boys ('04, '07 and the new addition arrived on Sept 8, 2010)
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Old 04-13-2010, 11:06 PM
 
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I've been getting the evil eye now that I'm slowly becoming more obviously pg with our fourth. Yes, we know what causes this. And YES IT WAS ON PURPOSE.
AMEN!

As a mother of 4 (5 and under) and due in Nov. I always tell them ~ yes we know what causes this ... we're getting damn good at it!

I don't know why people think they have any right to pick how many kids my husband and I chose to welcome into our lives.

~Bekah~ wife to Richard ~ mom to 4 on earth & 4 in heaven
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Old 04-14-2010, 01:04 PM
 
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I still get the "But you already have one boy, and one girl, that's enough."

Lisa ~ Homeschooling mama to 9yo ds and 7yo dd both born at home and expecting #3 in November!
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Old 04-14-2010, 02:14 PM
 
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Look at their belly (if a woman) and respond with "and how about you? What are you having?"

*snicker*

Fight rude with rude, I say.

Part hippie-chick, part type-A career woman, all mama. Enjoying life as a wife to my partner of 11 years, and a mama to our smarty-pants toddler, Cadence.

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Old 04-14-2010, 02:19 PM
 
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Originally Posted by VillageMom6 View Post
Here's a good way to confuse people...

Have a girl after having two boys... and then get pregnant again. People will be scratching their heads, wondering why you would do that. You already got your girl... why get pregnant again??
i have a boy and a girl already and i got lots of comments about how i dont need to have anymore now i have one of each..... i'm 22 weeks now with a boy

my boobs are eeeevil.................eeevil i tells ya....
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Old 04-14-2010, 02:27 PM
 
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I am lucky not to get those comments... although I have a DS and a DD... this is DFs first child, so everyone understands WHY we are having one (even though the majority of people do not think it was planned because we are not yet married. They can stay ignorant for all I care.)

Artist, photographer, stay-at-home-mom and Marine wife. Mom to 4; a boy and three little girls.
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Old 04-14-2010, 02:33 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I am lucky not to get those comments... although I have a DS and a DD... this is DFs first child, so everyone understands WHY we are having one (even though the majority of people do not think it was planned because we are not yet married. They can stay ignorant for all I care.)
I think people still don't believe our first was planned since we weren't married.

I told DH it's his responsibility to call his mother and tell her we're having a boy, and if she says one. single. word. to me about not getting "her girl" or it being "too bad" I'm gonna go medieval on her @ss.

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Old 04-14-2010, 02:36 PM
 
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I am glad we do not know the gender yet.

If its a boy... his family will basically say yeah we know. My family wont care either way and will just be happy.

If its a girl... his family will keep telling us its a boy until we have the baby. My family will say haha told you so! (I am convinced its a boy)

Artist, photographer, stay-at-home-mom and Marine wife. Mom to 4; a boy and three little girls.
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