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Resources for dh

750 views 5 replies 5 participants last post by  HawaiianBlesing 
#1 ·
This is baby #3 for dh and I. The first two times I got an epidural- but not before experiencing a bit of labor first with dh there to help. And in reality I have proven to be an independent birther. Before I got the epidural I was in the zone and did not want to be bothered- don't say anything, don't touch me, just leave me be but dh was a wonderful support! This time I will be having an unmedicated birth. I'm ready and willing! I've read a heck of a lot on labor and birth- what to expect, coping skills, etc. I will continue to do so throughout this pregnancy. I've looked into birthing classes for us but Birthing From Within and Birthworks are both way too far away to even consider and there is only one Bradley Class offered in our area that is starting in a few weeks on a night that will absolutely not work for us. I feel confident that even without attending a birthing class dh and I will be just fine but I would like to find some resources for him to give him more insight and knowledge as to what will be happening and what he can do. If he really knows what each stage of labor means and what I'll need and what he can do then he'll be just that much more confident and helpful. So what would be a helpful resource? I do plan on tracking down a copy of the book The Birth Partner by Penny Simkin but I would prefer more resources. Sometimes one will click more than another you know? Thanks in advance!
 
#2 ·
I mostly just talk to DF about what will be happening. I also made sure he understood all the common interventions and why I didn't want them. but DF is the type that accepts that I've put a lot of research and thought into these things and would rather hear it in a slightly condensed version from me than do a lot of reading.
 
#3 ·
Ooh, we just watched "The Business of Being Born" last night. This is my third, too, and DH really learned a lot from the movie. He took Bradley classes with me for the first kid, but didn't seem to really absorb anything. But he was enthralled with the movie.
 
#4 ·
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marissamom View Post

I mostly just talk to DF about what will be happening. I also made sure he understood all the common interventions and why I didn't want them. but DF is the type that accepts that I've put a lot of research and thought into these things and would rather hear it in a slightly condensed version from me than do a lot of reading.
I do definitely plan on talking to him about it. We have talked about it some. He knows what I want and is fully supportive but he's a reader and I think finding a book would be something he would get a lot out of. I know he has no interest in reading a medical manual on labor but something about being a birth partner would help us both out. ;)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lyss View Post

Ooh, we just watched "The Business of Being Born" last night. This is my third, too, and DH really learned a lot from the movie. He took Bradley classes with me for the first kid, but didn't seem to really absorb anything. But he was enthralled with the movie.
I hadn't thought of that. I plan on watching it again soon so maybe I can wrangle him into watching it with me. :p
 
#5 ·
We are preparing for DS2 and even though we took birthing classes with our first, it's been awhile (almost 6 years), and also, those classes were geared for someone going to a hospital, while we are planning a HB. With this in mind, I've been re-reading Ina May's Guide to Childbirth and marking sections for DH to read as well. He's not as much of a reader as I am, and would never tackle the whole book, but handing it off with some post-its inserted and then asking him to read a chapter, or selected pages, so we can talk about it, does work for us. In particular, reading other women's birth stories has been helpful for him - has helped us to talk about what we want and what we don't, and also review how the partner's actions affected the mom in question.
 
#6 ·
My DH won't even consider watching TBOBB. He's really not into watching other women give birth. We are both in the medical field and did a whole day in L&D but that's just not going to cut it. I've read a ton and he is trusting me to guide him through. I think that's pretty funny considering this is my first and I will be absolutely clueless as to what's going to happen (as far as emotions/feelings/how I'm going to react etc). I have an idea of what to expect. We are HBing....it was a mutual decision which I'm glad he's on board for. He didn't really want a hospital birth either.

I think I'm going to get him The Birth Partner; it came highly recommended.
 
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