Polite way to get total strangers to get off my case about my pregnancy? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 12 Old 06-08-2011, 12:49 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I can think of a lot of kind of rude ways to deflect strangers who start interrogating me about my pregnancy. But I work in customer service, so I need some ideas of non-rude methods. Anyone? Anything that has worked for you? I hate that this big belly makes everybody feel they're entitled to know my business!


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#2 of 12 Old 06-08-2011, 01:37 PM
 
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I've worked retail a lot, but never while pregnant. But I still hate when people start asking too many personal questions, and I feel like I have to answer them just to be friendly.  One trick I would use is just to turn the conversation around to them. Most people LOVE to talk about themselves. For example,

 

Customer: When's the baby due?

Me: In August, thanks for asking. (quickly, before they can ask another question) Are you a parent?

Customer: Yes.. or No..

Me: (asking lots of questions about their kids, etc.)

 

This usually sidetracks them long enough to get them through the line until the next customer comes.

 

Another thing is just to lie. Sometimes I would just make stuff up to answer their questions. It's not like you'll ever see them again!


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#3 of 12 Old 06-08-2011, 04:45 PM
 
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Can you (also a lie) interrupt them and say that your company has asked employees to not divulge too much personal information, or that you've already been spoken to by a supervisor about not chattering away about your pregnancy.  You'd just love to talk about it, but company policy forbids it...


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#4 of 12 Old 06-09-2011, 04:01 AM
 
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Heh; good luck with that. Ask for a raise instead. :p I know there's a recession on, but getting a raise is probably easier than getting strangers to refrain from commenting about your baby bump! (Says the lady who managed to freak two people out at the grocery store today, by replying to "When is it due?" with "Today" - which happens to be true. Good times.)

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#5 of 12 Old 06-09-2011, 04:49 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Smokering View Post
 (Says the lady who managed to freak two people out at the grocery store today, by replying to "When is it due?" with "Today" - which happens to be true. Good times.)


Ha!  I want to use that line NOW and I'm not due for 2 months!!  Awesome!!

 

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#6 of 12 Old 06-22-2011, 06:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Italiamom View Post

Can you (also a lie) interrupt them and say that your company has asked employees to not divulge too much personal information, or that you've already been spoken to by a supervisor about not chattering away about your pregnancy.  You'd just love to talk about it, but company policy forbids it...

I wish, but considering people in my line of work tend to form relationships with regular customers, and shoot the breeze with them a lot, I doubt anyone would believe me. Too bad!
 

 


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#7 of 12 Old 06-22-2011, 06:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:

Originally Posted by cat13 View Post

One trick I would use is just to turn the conversation around to them. Most people LOVE to talk about themselves.

That's a good call. If I get another shift at work, I'll have to try it. I used it on this girl on the bus, but after her response was that she didn't have kids but really wanted them, I felt okay about talking to her. Perhaps partly because I knew I didn't HAVE to.


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#8 of 12 Old 06-23-2011, 12:50 PM
 
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Hahaha, I love doing that!  I went four days overdue last time and we went to a mall to do some walking in the air conditioning.  I went in a baby clothing store and an employee asked me when I was due...I said, "Three days ago."  I seriously thought she was going to pass out.  I was highly amused, though.  LOL!

 

I love how total strangers will say the weirdest things to pregnant women.  I had an employee at one store a few weeks ago look at my two children, look at my belly, and say "My you are going to have your hands full!  OOPS!"  Um, since when is three kids OOPS???  People seem to lose their ability to think before they speak in the presence of a pregnant belly.

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Smokering View Post

Heh; good luck with that. Ask for a raise instead. :p I know there's a recession on, but getting a raise is probably easier than getting strangers to refrain from commenting about your baby bump! (Says the lady who managed to freak two people out at the grocery store today, by replying to "When is it due?" with "Today" - which happens to be true. Good times.)


 

 


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#9 of 12 Old 06-23-2011, 12:54 PM
 
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Originally Posted by rach03 View Post

Hahaha, I love doing that!  I went four days overdue last time and we went to a mall to do some walking in the air conditioning.  I went in a baby clothing store and an employee asked me when I was due...I said, "Three days ago."  I seriously thought she was going to pass out.  I was highly amused, though.  LOL!

 

I love how total strangers will say the weirdest things to pregnant women.  I had an employee at one store a few weeks ago look at my two children, look at my belly, and say "My you are going to have your hands full!  OOPS!"  Um, since when is three kids OOPS???  People seem to lose their ability to think before they speak in the presence of a pregnant belly.

 


 

 


Awesome!

And yikes, srsly, 3 kids is not anything to even remotely react to.  Whatever to that employee!! 

 


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#10 of 12 Old 06-24-2011, 06:09 PM
 
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"OOOPS?!"

 

REALLY?

 

Wow I bet their head would explode if they saw me out with my FIVE kids and big ol' pregnant belly.

 

If someone is getting too personal, you can always come out with the old standby "Why would you ask that?"

 

It's not rude, but it places the burden on them of explaining why they would think that was an appropriate question.

 

 

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#11 of 12 Old 06-24-2011, 10:19 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cat13 View Post

This usually sidetracks them long enough to get them through the line until the next customer comes.

 

Another thing is just to lie. Sometimes I would just make stuff up to answer their questions. It's not like you'll ever see them again!

This is so true. Its kinda easier.
 

 

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#12 of 12 Old 06-25-2011, 01:21 AM
 
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I went to Rite Aide to pick up a few last minute things while in labor with my daughter (I didn't drive, my mother did). The lady at the register was having an issue with the register and waiting for a manager, who was taking forever. Meanwhile I was focusing inward through contractions which had gone from noticeable to ouch! while in the store. While waiting for the manager the woman looked at me and said, "So when are you due?" and I just stared at her and said "I'm in labor right now." haha. DD was born about 4 hours later.

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by rach03 View Post

Hahaha, I love doing that!  I went four days overdue last time and we went to a mall to do some walking in the air conditioning.  I went in a baby clothing store and an employee asked me when I was due...I said, "Three days ago."  I seriously thought she was going to pass out.  I was highly amused, though.  LOL!


 

OP, I'm not sure of any sure fire way to get customers to not get too personal. I was working in retail until a few months ago, so I know what you mean. If there's certain questions that bother you then it's sometimes easy to think of a way to shut down that line of questioning politely... for instance I keep getting a lot of disbelief that my due date is still several months away, and when people comment I tend to just smile and say, "Yup! Baby and I are very healthy." I had  two women come in to the store right before I left and argue about if my torso was long or short shrug.gif I tend to find being vague and positive about everything bores people enough they stop asking.


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