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#181 of 370 Old 03-16-2013, 01:31 PM
 
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Hello everyone,
Glad to see the activity here has picked up again. I've been pretty zen here. There's really nothing to do other than clean up the house and slowly start preparing. DH still has his head in the sand (totally freaked out) and that means we really haven't talked about anything baby or pregnancy related, it's like the elephant in the room. The fact that I'm not showing makes it easier to ignore too. I'm ok with waiting for him for now, we still have so much time.

1babysmom, I wish you a wonderful birthing experience and a healthy baby next month!

revolting, that's pretty much what my doc said and I sort of gave in to that: there is nothing to do besides have faith and let things develop. It's given me a lot of peace. In the past year I've also learned a lot about myself and learned to trust that whatever tragedy may come my way, I am strong and I will be okay in the end.

katie, I can see how that would make it hard, witnessing every day all the things that can go wrong. The guided meditation helped me a lot early on, hope it does the trick for you.

coffeebean, glad to hear you're doing well!

pokey, I hope your previa resolves itself. I just ordered Birthing from Within from the library and I have to go pick it up. Mostly been reading romance novels. I can't bring myself to pay more than $2.99 for an e-book so the YA novels are generally out for me.

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#182 of 370 Old 03-16-2013, 10:19 PM
 
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devilish--Maybe.  If my placenta doesn't move out of the way, I will have to have a c-section which I would like to avoid.  They say there is a 90% chance that it will move out of the way and be totally fine for a vaginal birth.  I have an ultrasound on April 1st to see if it has moved.  If it doesn't, I will ask for another one later to make sure.  In the meantime, I am preparing for a regular birth and waiting to see what happens.




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#183 of 370 Old 03-17-2013, 06:28 AM
 
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Pokey: I hope it has moved so you can have the birth you want.


Me (33), DH (35) and DD1 (3) conceived naturally after 6 months. After TTC#2 for 15 months, finally got a pos.gif on my second cycle of Clomid, DD2 born Sept, 2013. Can I convince my DH it's a great idea to have another one?
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#184 of 370 Old 03-17-2013, 08:02 AM
 
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wave.gifMorning ladies!! I'd love to join in this thread. I noticed the thread when poking around the I'm Pregnant groups. So glad I did!! I "recognize" some of you from the Saner TTC thread (hello again to GISDiva, Dakipode, Devilish and Revolting - sorry if I missed anyone, I've not gone back too many pages yet) and I'm so excited to be joining you over here. I'm a little over 6 weeks with #2 after 10 cycles TTC. I'm 36 and have an amazing, spirited 9 yo DD who is over the moon excited to be a Big Sister. I have my first OB appointment with ultrasound April 9. Holding my breath a little until then. Feeling generally exhausted and so, so nauseous, which I find infinitely reassuring. I am an advanced practice nurse (RN, nearly done with coursework to be a Family Nurse Practitioner). I worked for years in critical care, ER and ICU, and then High Risk OB (working in Labor and Delivery at our Regional Perinatal Center). I currently teach Health to Middle School and Upper School students at an independent school (which I LOVE). My previous work has tainted my holistic belief/trust in my body but I have vowed to allow myself to live in the moment with this pregnancy and enjoy every minute of it. As Dakipode wisely commented many months back, when I was struggling with TTC and getting my DH fully on board, it is all a leap of faith and ultimately that is the hardest thing (in life and relationships) to believe it will all work out, it will all be okay. I cannot tell you Dakipode how that has repeated in my mind over and over the last few months. I do believe it will be okay, it will work out, and I am strong enough to deal with whatever outcome comes my way.

 

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#185 of 370 Old 03-17-2013, 09:46 AM
 
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sparklemaman, so glad you're joining us! I wish you a very uneventful pregnancy and a healthy, happy baby!
Trust is so hard because it is an unfounded belief. I was raised to question/examine everything and not believe it till I see it and so "having faith" is something I have to practice. It's strange to think about how your beliefs really shape your world. I'm pretty skeptical in some areas but then on the other hand I believe that people are innately good. I choose to believe it because the alternative is too depressing/discouraging. In that same line of reasoning I choose to believe that everything will be ok in the end because otherwise why bother? Why try if you think it's not going to work out?
Anyway, just a bit of philosophical rambling on my part this morning.

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#186 of 370 Old 03-17-2013, 10:17 AM
 
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Sparklemaman - Hooray, so glad to see you here!

Not a lot of time for personals, I'm heading out momentarily for a much needed vacation. Glad to see some activity back in this thread - you are all such a special group! I'm 11 weeks yesterday and feeling decent, a little energy coming back. I'm trying to just go with the flow on my ever shifting emotions, appetite, and activity level.

Sending you all my best!

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#187 of 370 Old 03-17-2013, 11:44 AM
 
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Lovely thoughts for this morning, ladies! 

 

The app I got is just called "Pregnancy". It has a pink background with kind of a funny blue face. :) I haven't tried it yet but I'm planning to tonight!


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#188 of 370 Old 03-18-2013, 08:46 AM
 
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I feel like I did a drive-by just to bump the thread up, sorry about that.  lol.gif  Hello everyone, and a special wave to those from the Saner TTW thread, there's so many of you here I recognize!

 

I'm feeling pretty darn good.  The only thing I am queasy about is that we're approaching the halfway point in a couple of weeks and I have not done much to prepare this time!  I keep thinking that since my first labor was pretty manageable I can just sail through this one too, but I really should get my head in a better place about that.  I have to keep reminding myself that every labor is different.  My midwife also has me prepared for a much faster second labor (maybe, of course, mileage may still vary), which would be great except that I hear it can be pretty intense.  But I agree with 1babysmom, I adore the labor process too.  Once I took my Bradley class and learned the mechanics of it, it was just so fascinating and it felt like accomplishing a marathon or something when it was all over.  Not that I know what a marathon is like, anyone who knows me knows that I don't run. Sheepish.gif  And I know it sounds corny, but I never feel more beautiful than when I'm pregnant. I'm sure I won't feel that way in about 15 weeks since I appear to be getting much bigger much sooner this time around, but for now I'm going to bask in all that goddess vibe I've got going on!  ROTFLMAO.gif

 

Dakipode, my husband has his head in the sand too.  I am really glad I have so many friends and my son excited for us, because DH certainly isn't showing it.  I shouldn't be surprised, he's a very reluctant father anyway.  He says not, but I can still feel it.  His plan was to never have children and then I came along and had to change my mind.  eyesroll.gif  The thing is, he's really good with babies.  Toddlers...well, we're working on that.  I think little Snickerdoodle (as DS has dubbed the baby so far) will kind of force DS and DH to find some common ground and really grow their relationship as DS gets older and they start sharing interests.

 

Hoping that placenta cooperates for you, Pokey!


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#189 of 370 Old 03-21-2013, 08:30 AM
 
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Sphinxy Yeah! Congrats to you too smile.gif So, so glad to see you here!! Hope your vacation is awesome and relaxing. I am looking forward to my Spring Break which begins next Friday.

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#190 of 370 Old 03-21-2013, 10:11 AM
 
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Hi Everyone!

 

Sorry I've been MIA from this thread (and MDC in general).  So glad to see so many here from the Saner TTC thread. luxlove.gif

 

I am at 24 weeks tomorrow and hanging in there.  My pregnancy has been difficult and scary at times so far (had some bleeding issues for many, many weeks).  But things have calmed down. I AM having trouble staying zen right now, though, due to the early complications and also current pain issues due to my over-softened pelvis.  Also exhausted all the time and still having on and off bouts of nausea.  There are fears and a general heightened base anxiety level. I am trying so hard to enjoy this and relax but it's been difficult.

 

I feel like a downer. Just wondering what anyone might recommend to get back into a better frame of mind.


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#191 of 370 Old 03-22-2013, 11:42 AM
 
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beingmommy, I'm sorry you've had such a rough time. This may sound cliche: focus on the things you are grateful for. There are many things out of your control but I assume you have access to a good medical team? How about supportive friends and family, people who are rooting for you and baby?
Practicing gratitude can sometimes feel forced to me but it helps me take a step back and put things in perspective and realize there are many ways in which my life is privileged.
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#192 of 370 Old 03-22-2013, 12:56 PM
 
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Thank you, Dakipode!  Such good advice. 

 

I was really in a funk yesterday and had some back of the mind worries about some lower abdominal pain I was having.  But I called my midwives and they had me come in for a heartbeat check and all is fine. They were so nice and supportive. We recently switched to them (from the OB group we were seeing) after my bleeding stuff cleared up and I was low-risk again. Really happy I found these midwives. I hadn't let myself lean on them yet because I did not want to be "that patient" but they were so nice and reassuring yesterday that I can call them anytime with worries and fears.  I feel much better today.  Sometimes I forget that the lows never last and things will feel better again soon.

 

So glad to see you here, Dakipode.  I never asked you, way back last fall, how did Nanowrimo end up going for you?  I had to stop early on because I got too sick with the monring sickness BUT I have been trying to do some writing again.  And thinking about my story is still helpful in distracting me from pregnancy worries.


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#193 of 370 Old 03-22-2013, 01:19 PM
 
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beingmommy,I sort of finished, recycled some of the stuff I'd already written so I could make it over 50K. I feel like I cheated but I also needed something to go right since we euthanized the cat and had the ectopic pregnancy that month as well... I've been letting my story sit for a while but now I'm ready to see if there's anything to salvage. There are some gems in there so I don't want to just dismiss the whole project.

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#194 of 370 Old 03-23-2013, 07:29 AM
 
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Dakipode, oh that would've been a really rough month!  So sorry!  But glad you got some good stuff out of the Nano.  I find much of Nano stuff I write is junk BUT there's always some good stuff hidden in there too.  I am pretty excited to get writing on my story too. I finally finished the prologue I had been writing for months and months and months. It's actually very short but just took me forever to get out of my head.   


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#195 of 370 Old 03-30-2013, 11:50 AM
 
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Indeed, it does, Dakipode! Are you feeling better this week, Beingmommy? I know for myself, my anxiety ebbs and flows. Right now I am mostly focused on doing what I need to, as I have been completely caught off guard with morning sickness (which was virtually non-existent with DD). It began right before 5 weeks and is going strong just past 8 now. I am doing what needs to be done, and little more, delegating tasks and responsibilities and being okay with DD getting WAY more screen time that I'd ideally like (PBS Kids and iPad). I even agreed to go out to dinner tonight, something I usually don't like to do. Normally, this would all make me feel really guilty and inadequate but somehow, it hasn't right now! I feel okay taking care of myself and not focusing on everyone else. Well, really I think feel totally justified as I am taking care of my little peanut 3rdtri.gif But it still feels liberating and is a letting go that needs to happen. Sphinxy How was your vacation? Were you somewhere warm and sunny? Pokey Sending you lots of good vibes and FX for your U/S Monday!! I know how very stressful complications can be and how the idea of not being able to have the birth you envision can trigger sadness and anger. I had Pre-eclampsia with DD and was on bedrest the last 12 weeks of my pregnancy (which went to term, btw!). Every week there was a discussion of potential outcomes, and always the threat of induction or C-Section. It was, as you'd imagine, a very stressful time. But ultimately things worked out, I had to reimagine what I expected and my choices were somewhat limited, but it worked out. In many ways it also helped me to let go and realize how little I had control over, such a humbling lesson every time I learn it!

 

Wishing you all a wonderful peaceful weekend.


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#196 of 370 Old 04-01-2013, 10:43 AM
 
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SparkleMaman, it sounds to me like you are doing a great job prioritizing and delegating, even if sometimes it means delegating to PBS kids! I mean, really, I'm with you on wanting to limit screen time, but I say congratulate yourself on making a good screen choice. It could be so much worse. You can't take care of anyone else if you aren't taking care of yourself, right? These are words I've been repeating to myself often. 

 

My vacation was... good. Warm. Relaxing. We went to Vegas (didn't gamble though, ha!), and enjoyed pampering ourselves and seeing a few shows. And yet also, it was exhausting. The cross-country flights may have been asking a bit too much of my pregnant body, I may have spent a bit too much time in the sun one of the days we were there, and overall it was difficult to enjoy some of the amazing food because at dinner time I would get about 5 bites into my meal and feel like I needed an instant nap! We realized that quickly and started taking advantage of really elaborate breakfasts instead when my energy and hunger were strong, and then just grabbed easy stuff to eat in the room at night instead of trying to go out to a nice restaurant for dinner. But DW and I had lots of quality time together which was wonderful, and I didn't check in with my work once, which was huge for me. I needed a break from work SO BADLY. 

 

This morning I woke in a little bit of a panic. I don't remember having a dream about daycare, but I had been talking about it with my SIL over the weekend, and I had this sudden thought upon waking today that I cannot put a 3 month old in daycare. I know lots of people (including said SIL) who do this and I do not judge their decisions one bit. But it was like a personal realization that I might not be physically capable of it. I know that I have to go back to work after my 12 weeks of maternity/FMLA - DW and I have discussed it and it truly is the best decision for our family right now. And since DW is a professor she will actually be on winter break when I go back to work (assuming birth happens around when we think it will), so she will be able to be with our little nugget until week 15/16 probably. But then I just don't know... I work from home but it is still a very hands-on 9-5 in front of a computer sort of gig, so my options I think are either daycare or having someone come to our house. I'm just not sure it's realistic to think I'll be able to work with someone else in my house taking care of my baby. Ugh, I had been feeling so much like "eh, we'll figure it out" before this, and now that calm has passed and I'm feeling like, "ah! we need to figure this out!". DW thinks daycare will be fine, and is going to look into the early childhood development center on her campus to see if they accept infants. If so I suppose I might be OK with it since nugget will be right there where DW works, but I just don't know... I guess more than solving this today I just really needed to get my concerns off my chest and share the fact that I'm having some anxiety. Thanks for reading along with my musings....


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#197 of 370 Old 04-02-2013, 12:54 PM
 
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Hello! May I join you?

I'm 15 weeks along in my second pregnancy after 18 months of TTC. I found myself struggling with anxiety and depression a lot in first tri. I've dealt with both anxiety and depression through much of my life, ebbing and flowing situationally, of course. Have used counseling and meds historically, as well as some less than healthy self-medication. I've more recently been trying to use methods like meditation, exercise, yoga, herbs and Rescue Remedy to cope with bad feelings. I suppose that the thing I identify as most problematic for me in general is the urge to plan, control and prepare for all possibilities. I'm looking for ways to help learn better self-talk, and get off the "what if?" hamster wheel.
I've had a fluke-y issue during this pregnancy that's causing me stress/distress. I am planning homebirth but wanted to be getting tandem medical care to obtain an anatomy scan, and have some point of contact should a transfer become necessary. I'm an OB nurse, and while I trust birth and my body (had a home birth with DS), I am somewhat conditioned by years of work within the medical model to have that backup safety net.

I had an initial visit with an OB that I work with in one of the local hospitals, where the prenatal labs included a test for hemoglobin a1c, which looks at blood sugar levels over time (they did this because my BMI is 30). It was borderline, in the "pre diabetic" range. I decided to transfer care to my family doc (who does pregnancy care) so that someone who is familiar with my health and history could help me navigate the issue. He has an integrative view on medical practice, and teaches residents in his clinic. I made the assumption that I'd get more personalized care, albeit with some involvement from residents. I'm getting a bit of a runaround, though. I was asked to monitor blood sugars at home, which I've done for 4 weeks (all normal). At my appointment yesterday, I saw only a resident (haven't been able to have an appointment with my doc yet). I expressed to her that I wanted to quit monitoring but would be open to doing more at the 24-26 week mark when GD screening usually occurs. She agreed but had to run it by my doc (who was present but chose to not come into the room). He sent her back with a different plan--continue to monitor, repeat the a1c test, and return in 4 weeks. I'm feeling very dissatisfied with this situation, as she wasn't able to explain why it was necessary to continue testing home glucose. I'm annoyed that my doc wouldn't step in for 5 minutes to discuss, especially because this is a unique situation (his office doesn't even recommend this a1c test for a very obese pregnant woman). Additionally, when I left (after waiting for my appointment over an hour and the appointment taking almost an hour) the scheduler wasn't able to get my any appointments with my primary doc until July. This is just crazy. The testing, the lack of a clear plan, and the knowledge that I can't even see him in person for months is causing increased anxiety, frustration and anger. I may as well have just stayed in the OB practice! Since there are just 3 OBs there, if likely have gotten more personal attention. Considering going back-but I don't want to be a total flake. Should need for labor transfer arise, I'd prefer to birth at the OB's hospital. It's small, I work there and it's closer to home. I'd just get whatever pediatrician was on call (neither of whom I'm fond, but it would just be for care in hospital). My doctor, who is also to be the baby's doctor, wouldn't be on call for me at the larger, farther away hospital, but would probably see the baby there if we ended up there.
Thanks for those who made it through this novel of a post. I haven't reviewed the whole thread, but hope to do so this evening. Any and all suggestions for my situation and for general coping with pregnancy anxiety are welcome! Thanks to all.

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#198 of 370 Old 04-02-2013, 06:49 PM
 
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Hi, I'd like to join. Nice to see so many familiar names from the Saner TTC thread! I'm a little slow coming over (at 17 weeks), but I only emerged from morning sickness/exhaustion about 2 weeks ago. I was so calm the first trimester because I was so sick all the time I couldn't think about anything else. Now that I'm feeling better, I'm starting to worry more about everything. My job doesn't feel as secure as it used to, and I have to study the budget to figure out how to afford maternity leave, etc. I'd like to start exercising. I hear that helps with stress.

 

I look forward to catching up with everybody I recognize and getting to know those I don't!


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#199 of 370 Old 04-04-2013, 11:20 AM
 
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Haurelia, it sounds like you know what the answer is.  If your family doctor is only making you more anxious, go back to the OB's!  And if your original doctor asks you why, don't be afraid to tell them.  Just be honest that you wanted something more personal than what you got.  There's nothing wrong with wanting a clear plan of action, and don't worry about appearances.  You're just doing what's best for you.  Sometimes we try something and it doesn't work, it's OK.  :)

 

And hi, Coati456!!! tiphat.gif


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#200 of 370 Old 04-05-2013, 05:51 AM
 
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Haurelia I totally agree with GISDiva. It's okay to compare providers, you are receiving a service and in no other realm would you think it was rude or unkind to look at your options, or try them on, so to speak. I struggled with this a bit recently as I've decided to switch providers, from my OB/Gyn of 10+ years (who is a friend and neighbor) to a CNM who delivers at the birth hospital I'd prefer. It was a tough decision and I felt like I was personally rejecting my Doc but I needed to choose what was comfortable for me.

 

Hi Coati wave.gif SO glad to see you here!! I'm very glad your morning sickness has lifted, so draining!! And I think the anxiety is quite normal, part of being a mama even before the birth.

 

Sphinxy Thanks, I think I have found an okay balance for now. Again, not ideal but the best the based on the situation and demands. I completely remember having those same thoughts about childcare when I was about 16-20 weeks with my DD!! I found having more information, looking at my options (visiting and interviewing) was helpful. It's so hard to imagine leaving your brand new little one. I am sure you will find a day care provider that fits with your family's needs. One of my good friends was debating between two excellent daycares last year, ended up at her second choice (no space for an infant when she returned to work at her first choice) and has discovered that the center they are at now (affiliated with a local university, btw) far exceeded their expectations and has been amazing for them; nearly all the moms there exclusively breastfeed, many babies hadn't even tried a bottle before entering the daycare, and many won't sleep in a crib alone (so the staff holds them). They also take their shoes off at the entrance (as everyone must), like in a home, since some of the babies are crawling around the floors. Good luck in your search!!

 

AFM I met with my MW on Tuesday, love her!! I feel so great about moving to her care now. She did a quick scan, as I mentioned my entire family being convinced we're having twins, and just one perfect little bean in there!! Hopefully that puts all the twin speculation to rest once and for all.

 

Have a great day, mamas!!


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#201 of 370 Old 04-05-2013, 07:47 PM
 
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Thanks for the thoughtful and reassuring replies ladies! I am going to sleep on it this weekend before deciding about where to continue my backup care. Neither option is comfortable, per se, so I'll be weighing all the pros and cons.
Interestingly, I did the repeat a1c and it was well within normal range at 4.8. Since this test measured 2-3 months' worth of blood glucose levels, it's fair to assume the first result of 6.4 was an error. It's virtually impossible to lower one's a1c so dramatically in 1.5 months...and I didn't dramatically change my diet or add more exercise! Anyhow, I'm much relieved. And, I am reinforced that I know my body best.
Hope everyone has a lovely weekend.

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#202 of 370 Old 04-21-2013, 12:34 PM
 
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Just checking in with all you peaceful mamas. I'm wondering what you have all been doing recently to maintain balance and calm? I have felt remarkable okay, despite major exhaustion and some weepiness associated with the extreme fatigue. I just returned from a whirlwind tour of Washington, DC with my 8th grade students. They were incredibly well behaved and generally fantastic. I was so very proud of them!! But the after midnight bedtimes and endless walking (hello walking from 7am until 11pm!) has taken a toll on my body and I am totally wiped out. I have a super busy day tomorrow and then back to my usual courses. I'm going on Tuesday for the Harmony Prenatal Test. With my DD I wasn't  really interested in labwork like that but I'm older now (36, soon to be 37) so it seems like a good idea to have more information. I feel relaxed about it now, we'll see how the 10 day wait goes!! Anyone else do the Harmony or MaterniT21 test?

 

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#203 of 370 Old 04-21-2013, 01:31 PM
 
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Sparklemaman, we had our big anatomy scan a week ago and that was definitely a milestone for me and a reassuring thing. I've been pretty laid back in general since I sort of started feeling pretty early on that there is really nothing else to do besides letting nature take its course.

We took some sort of genetic screening test at 12 weeks, not sure what it was called but it was one of the less detailed ones, she had me put 6 drops of blood on a postcard... After getting those results I relaxed and then the anatomy scan really helped too.

 

DH and I have been slowly working on the unfinished projects in the house, I certainly still feel like we have all the time in the world, September feels so far away especially since it hasn't gotten terribly hot here yet (we did get up to 80 last week). I think once the summer really hits, i.e. 100 degree days in June, it'll probably become more urgent.

 

We went to a big second-hand sale today and it was fun to look at cheap baby stuff. Got some one piece suit thingies with zippers for $1-2 a piece, how can you go wrong? It was also nice to have DH come along and actually see him get excited about some of these things.

 

I think as a general rule my fears about something going wrong with the pregnancy have faded as I'm getting further along. So now I feel like I'm in this blissfully ignorant "I don't know what it's like to have a newborn in the house" state. Not yet in "oh my god we're actually going to have a baby" panic mode.


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#204 of 370 Old 04-22-2013, 09:02 AM
 
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I actually didn't go for any of the additional testing early on, even though I'll be 38 when the baby is born and DH is 40.  The ultrasound was a week ago and everything looks good.  :)  I had kind of already decided against it when I talked to a friend of mine who did do it (they're even older than us) and even though they say it's more accurate, they still had a big freak out for no reason and they're telling all of their friends to stay away. lol.gif  That kind of sealed the deal with me.  I certainly don't begrudge anyone that does decide to do it though, it sounds like it's much more reliable than the old methods.

 

I don't know, I've been so busy and tired, I almost don't have time to freak out.  And this baby is SO active, it's hard to go very long without a reminder.  :)

 

Thanks for bumping the thread up Sparkle, hope your test goes well and those 10 days go by quickly!


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#205 of 370 Old 04-22-2013, 09:57 AM
 
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We did the general first and second trimester screenings with NT scan.  Our provider doesn't offer Harmony or Materniti21, but I think they sound really cool.  It would be great to have more info without doing something more invasive.  I was 37 at the time, and our results were great so that was a big relief.  In the second trimester, I felt a lot less anxiety about something being wrong.  I hope that is true for all of you.  I was worried a little about my placenta previa, but that wouldn't hurt the baby, and it resolved itself so it's not a worry anymore.  It seems like the second trimester is so much better because you don't feel as sick and maybe there are more happy pregnancy hormones.  I felt great most of the time.  Now I am starting to feel uncomfortable and more anxious.  Sleeping is getting a little harder, and the baby moving around can feel not so good sometimes.  I am trying to prepare for the birth, and find daycare, but I am a terrible procrastinator and putting it off makes me feel more anxious.  Vicious cycle.  We are doing fine with getting things ready for the baby, and we are finishing up our childbirth class, and we have a newborn care class scheduled.  I am also well into Birthing from Within so I feel like I am getting there on labor prep.  We just need to practice our coping techniques and such.  I have been listening to some birth hypnosis and meditations which are very relaxing.  They put me to sleep, but I think that's OK.  I am also going to yoga, but sometimes I am tired and just want to be home.  Those are the big things I am doing to deal with stress or anxiety.  At this point, I am not so worried about the baby being OK, but sometimes I get nervous about him coming early.  In part because I want everything to be ready at work before I leave, and partly because I want the baby to be full-term and healthy.  It seems as you go along, there is less to worry about when it comes to being pregnant and the baby being healthy, but there is more to think about in terms of actually being a parent.  You spend a lot more time taking care of the child than being pregnant and giving birth, so it makes sense to prepare for that part too.




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#206 of 370 Old 04-22-2013, 10:14 AM
 
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Thanks for the bump, Sparkle! And good to hear from you. I can't imagine going on that trip. Wow, I'm exhausted just thinking about it! I definitely find that if I push it that much with physical activity I pay the price for a couple days after. Even at almost 16 weeks, my best days include putting my feet up for a few hours in the afternoon. 

 

Dakipode, I'm definitely also in that "we have all the time in the world" stage right now. I haven't been too stressed about anything going wrong either, just trying to let it be what it will be, but I guess some of that has to do with this being my first rodeo and not really having any risk factors. So I just cross my fingers that it continues and carry on. 

 

Afm, I've been away from MDC for a few weeks, both because of some work travel and also just feeling kind of distant, but I missed you all and I'm glad to be back. One of my struggles was that I was having a hard time connecting to some of the people in my DDC. I think part of it is just that there are so many people to keep track of! Anyway, I really enjoy this community here. All around lately I'm just trying to accept pregnancy for what it is, reminding myself every day that it is both OK and possible to feel extremely grateful to be pregnant while also not loving all the symptoms and changes that come along with it. My energy hasn't gotten that famous "2nd tri surge" yet, but boy am I ready for it. Some people in my family and work life have had irritating reactions to my pregnancy. I'm not very "girlie" and I'm struggling to find maternity clothes that I feel comfortable in. And overall I just miss feeling more active. But the good news is that I'm finally feeling my appetite come back. For the last week I've been craving mixed greens with balsamic dressing, which is such a relief because now I don't have to worry that my baby will be a giant english muffin! I was really disappointed in how much empty carbs I was eating but I just didn't have the stomach for anything healthier. DW has been the most amazing rock of support and encouragement to be patient with myself and take it all one day at a time. 

 

Everyone has to make the best decision for themselves about the genetic testing. I'd just like to share a family experience that I think offers a different point of view than a lot of people get to hear. My niece has special needs. It's not Down's but it's similar. My SIL was pregnant in her early thirties and I think my BIL was about mid/late thirties. Anyway, it was low-risk, and they had no idea in advance that anything could be out of the ordinary. When my niece was born there just happened to be a doc in the maternity wing who was well-versed in my niece's disability. He noticed a faint but significant trait in her profile that is common in people with this condition, and suggested testing. This really affected the birth experience. Rather than just getting to be elated and snuggly with their newborn, my BIL & SIL were confused and upset as their newborn daughter was whisked off for testing. Now, let me be clear, they would not change a thing about her. Her special needs are part of her wonderful uniqueness. BUT, had they know in advance, they would have had a few advantages: 1) they could have just focused on the experience of the birth of their first child without the immediate tests and stress 2) they could have prepared themselves emotionally for what this would mean for them, 3) they could have been prepared in advance with information on recommended treatment and resources available to help, rather than having do all that research at the same time that they were trying to just adapt to having a newborn at home for the first time. As it was, the early diagnosis enabled them to take advantage of physical therapy and other available treatment almost immediately, which is largely credited for how well she is doing today. We will never know how long diagnosis and treatment may have been delayed had that doctor not been in the hospital that day. 


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#207 of 370 Old 04-22-2013, 10:53 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pokeyAC View Post
I am a terrible procrastinator and putting it off makes me feel more anxious.  Vicious cycle.  

 Hi Pokey! I almost missed your post, I think we were typing at the same time. Oh boy, this quote is going to be me at some point, I'm just sure of it. It's usually not an issue for things like work because I just try to accept that I work best under pressure and it always gets done, but really, that's not how I want to go into life with a newborn! I can hardly believe how far along you are, I remember when you got your BFP and here you are getting so close! You may feel like a procrastinator but I would say as an outsider that I'm impressed by how much you have done already. Makes me think I better start reading something... haha! I have the books but have had no desire to open them yet. When did you start your child birth class?


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#208 of 370 Old 04-22-2013, 11:05 AM
 
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Seconding Sphinxy. I am a horrible procrastinator. With my firstborn, I insisted upon a trip to Target during active labor due to not having a diaper pail. (This might have contributed to how I had my eldest in the car on the way to the hospital.) She was born a few daya after her EDD, so I have no excuse beyond disorganization.
Sphinxy: Subsitute ranch dressing on the greens and I've really been digging the same thing. I wish I craved a healthy vinegrette instead... I blame my kids for making it look so good. It's the only way they'll eat salad (and then they will gorge on it, which I kind of love having kids gorge on salad).
AFM: 15 weeks on Wednesday and feeling much more peaceful about the pregnancy, but still not ready to tell extended family and friends or switch to my homebirth practice. Still sort of in denial we will have another!

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#209 of 370 Old 04-22-2013, 11:17 AM
 
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Lol revolting, I am a ranch fiend! I use it on almost everything - potatoes, veggies, roast chicken, I even mix it in with rice sometimes if it comes out too bland. But this last week, I don't know, it's like I can't get the flavor of balsamic vinegar out of my mind! I could drink a bottle of it, it is tasting so good!

My wife (30) and I (32) have been legally married since 2006. We are proud queer mamas to baby W, born 10/10/2013.
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#210 of 370 Old 04-22-2013, 11:58 AM
 
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sphinxy, speaking of drinking vinegar: I've been drinking kombucha daily. Partially because of the antibiotics I had to take and I just want to rebuild and support my body but I also find that I'm craving it. I don't make it myself but I was lucky to find a sale at vitamin cottage so that's how I can afford it.


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