Baby Shower *and* Meet the Baby Party? - Mothering Forums

Thread Tools
#1 of 2 Old 02-28-2013, 09:39 AM - Thread Starter
bmcneal's Avatar
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: in my own little world
Posts: 2,047
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

My mom* said she was going to throw a baby shower for me, and needed addresses to send invitations. I started giving her the names/addresses, and she said, "Oh, I'm not actually planning one. It was just a thought that I should probably plan one." so I said okay. Then one of my friends offered to throw me a baby shower, and since my mom said she *wasn't* going to plan one, I said friend could, if she wanted to. So my friend ran into my mom, and said something about throwing a shower, and my mom told her she was going to plan one, and could friend give mom addresses. My friend told DF that she didn't want to make my mom mad, so she isn't going to throw a baby shower, but "2 or 3 weeks after the baby is born, we're going to do a meet the baby party." I don't have many of my friends' addresses (they've all moved at least twice since I last saw them in person, but we keep in contact regularly through text/e-mail/facebook), but I'm pretty sure my friend does, but she didn't give them to my mom. I'm worried that asking people for their addresses to send them invites to a shower is rude, like I'm just asking for presents (I'm not. I really just want to have someone around other than me be excited I'm pregnant/going to have a baby. I've never had that before. My biological mom* even went so far as to say I should have/should have had abortions with DD and DS, and that was the person I was around 99% of the time with my pregnancies. So having people excited/happy/supportive would be *so* nice. DF isn't even excited. Just me, and sometimes DD.) So I don't know how to have my mom have the addresses, since friend didn't give them to her, and I don't want to be a rude to ask.


The other part of this is I'm not sure it is good/okay/polite to have a baby shower *and* a meet the baby party. It just seems like too much asking for attention. The other part of the situation is, for a myriad of reasons, I don't really *want* to have a meet the baby party.


I don't know what to do, but I'm due in April, so I really need to figure this out and/or get advice on what other people might do, because I don't have much time before baby comes.


ETA: It would be the same group of people invited to both things, and that's 99% of the reason I think it's especially distasteful.

sleeping.gifMama to DD dust.gif(12.2005), DS1 sleepytime.gif (01.2009), DS2 babyboy.gif (04.28.2013) with DH heartbeat.gif04.10.13!!heartbeat.gif namaste.gif

bmcneal is offline  
Sponsored Links
#2 of 2 Old 03-01-2013, 01:31 PM
Quinalla's Avatar
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Ohio, USA
Posts: 2,334
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I think it's fine to have both, in fact I would be a bit sad if I was invited to the baby shower and not the meet the baby party, though not the other way around. If you don't want to have a meet the baby party, then just tell your friend no thanks. Could you Mom maybe throw a shower for family only and your friend throw one for friends only? That way there would be no cross-inviting, no meet the baby party per your preference and your friend and mom could still both get to do something? And for your friends you keep up with electronically, I see no problem inviting them electronically, it's a baby shower, not a wedding invite which is about the only thing etiquette-wise you sort of "have to" invite through the mail (though not really!) And if you want things to be low-key, let the planners know, if you just want people to come and be with you and not bring gifts, let them know. Some people will bring gifts anyway, but you can just throw a "Hey, we are excited about the baby and want to have one last hooray" party too, especially with your friends, if that is more your style.

Katie trekkie.gif - Married to Mike 06/02/01, Mom to Sydney Anne born 11/21/09 and Alice Maeryn & Oliver Thomas born 04/24/13  hug.gif 



Quinalla is offline  

User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Online Users: 15,199

20 members and 15,179 guests
beckyleeh , Bufomander , girlspn , hillymum , IsaFrench , Kate_H21 , lisak1234 , MartinaTempleton , MarylandMommy , moominmamma , Motherof3already , NaturallyKait , RollerCoasterMama , rubelin , scaramouche131 , sciencemum , worthy , Xerxella
Most users ever online was 449,755, 06-25-2014 at 12:21 PM.