Tandem Breastfeeding anyone? - Mothering Forums

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Old 03-17-2013, 08:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My almost 3 year old daughter weaned at the end of my first trimester on her own. I was both grateful and sad to see her end, yet my breasts were also quite sore with pregnancy.  Then at the start of my third trimester she looked at my breasts, smelt them carefully, and proclaimed "milk!". She tried to suck and amazingly my milk had returned. However, she had forgotten how to suck in the three months since she stopped breast-feeding, yet she relearned in a few weeks. Now she is asking to breast-feed a lot. I allow it doubt 4-5 times a day. 

 

What have other mamas experiences been? Is anyone planning to tantum feed?  I have no previous experience with it, and I am wondering if anyone has any tips on how to make it successful and not too overwhelming. My hope is that it may encourage positive sibling relationships - has this been anyone's experience?

 

Thank-you!

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Old 03-17-2013, 09:08 PM
 
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Too funny, SP!  I was just looking to post somewhere about tips or advice for tandem BFing!

 

DS is 32 months, I am 33wks and planning to tandem.  He has been even more interested in BFing lately, since my colostrum came in. (it's pretty cute actually.  A few weeks ago I asked him if there was any moot (his name for my milk) when he nursed and he said yes.  I asked him what it tastes like, and he got a big grin on his face and said "like chocolate and candy!" lol).

 

Anyway, I have no idea about tandem nursing, but plan to give it a try.  I believe that you are supposed to let the nb nurse first, at least until your milk comes in.  I actually had over-production and a crazy let-down last time, so I think having a toddler who nurses around could help make nursing for the nb easier!


N, wife to my goofball K partners.gif and mamma to my EC grad D (July 2010) and my new little love S (May 2013).  Exploring the uncharted territory of tandem nursing with my two boys.

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Old 03-17-2013, 09:41 PM
 
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I have tandem and triandem nursed and I don't know about how it affected their relationships, but it definitely eased the transition to having a new baby in the family!! I found it to be a pretty easy process, it never felt like a huge additional amount of nursing IMO, as the new babe had priority and the older nursling(s) only nursed a few times a day at most. FWIW though I always nightweaned during pregnancy so never had to worry about nursing more than one at night...I imagine that would be much more difficult!

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Old 03-18-2013, 03:52 AM
 
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I am tandem feeding an almost-3 year old and a four month old. My toddler was down to only a few feeds a day by the time the baby was born but, after my milk came in she wanted to feed all. the. time. I have had to limit her for practical reasons (ie doing anything but feed her all day) and also because I find it really uncomfortable to feed her now. I also had to stop feeding them at the same time as that made me want to climb out of my skin and run away screaming.

Milk supply hasn't been an issue. The toddler's feedings are fairly random so I haven't had to worry about newborn first as a strict rule. Of course I settle the baby first if they both want feeding at the same time.

I don't know if it's helped sibling relationships or not but my LO adores her baby sister and there haven't been any jealousy issues so far.

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Old 03-18-2013, 07:52 PM
 
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I had a pretty negative experiencee tandem nursing, so no advice... But I know La Leche League has a book called Adventures in Tandem Nursing. HTH!

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Old 03-19-2013, 12:49 AM
 
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I'm 21 weeks, DD is soon to be 2 and nursing for nap, bedtime and a little overnight. I hope to tandem nurse as she is nowhere near ready to stop (and is just too young IMO). I'm looking forward to getting my supply back near the end of the pregnancy since the dry nursing is becoming pretty uncomfortable. It always feels worst in the evening/overnight, exactly when she needs it most. I second the recommendation for the LLL book, Adventures in Tandem Nursing. It's common sense ish but had a ton of stories from moms who've BDTD - mostly those who ended up tandem nursing but also some who weaned during pregnancy. There was a whole section on how to weigh the pros and cons and make the decision whether to tandem that I found really helpful. My plan is to allow DD to tandem nurse as much as possible but I won't feel shy about limiting her to make it practical and sustainable. She's a smart cookie and will adjust well enough, I think. I also hope that nursing both will make the transition easier on DD. I got pregnant a little earlier than planned and feel strongly about doing my best to keep DD feeling nurtured and secure since she's so little.
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Old 03-19-2013, 08:21 AM
 
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My oldest are 2 years 3 months apart and I nursed through out my pregnancy and  then tandem for the first 9 months.

It made the adjustment to two much easier for them, nursing is great for the concept of sharing wen there is enough to go around. They would hug or pat each other, it was adorable. Also great in the bath when we were all going cray.

 

It also meant my milk was good and in when Bee was born and she spend most of her under 12 hour hospital stay lactched on.

 

It was also heaven sent when I hit the fun of engorgement and my newborn did not have the capacity to do anything to help. The look on my toddlers face when he realized why daddy had woken him up at 2 am was priceless.

 

It also made potty training (when the new baby was 6 weeks) much easier with the nice soft poops.


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Old 03-31-2013, 01:02 PM
 
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so good to hear all these experiences - i'm newly pregnant and my 23 month old daughter still nurses a lot, and recently it's been a good 10 times or more a day, so i don't think she would wean on her own *any* time soon. i really hope i'm able to bf her through the pregnancy and then it would be awesome to do some tandem breastfeeding too.
 

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Old 04-01-2013, 12:47 PM
 
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I never did, since I weaned DD when I was pregnant with DS.  Right around her third birthday.  However, my sister is doing it now with her 2 year old and 7 week old.  She is having a very bad experience (lots of agitation when her toddler nurses), and she really regrets not weaning her DD during pregnancy.  She's also a bit shocked since she only heard rainbow and roses stores of tandem nursing.  She doesn't like nursing her DD at all (major aversion) and has limited it, but it's hard because her DD cries for it all of the time since she sees the baby nursing.  She never found nursing while pregnant unpleasant at all.  Emotionally it's hard because she's feels very bad for her oldest and she personally doesn't want their nursing relationship to end on a bad note.


mama to DD (7), DS (3.5), and another DS arriving in August!

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Old 04-01-2013, 02:22 PM
 
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Yes, I have heard that an aversion to nursing the older child is not uncommon.  I'm hoping that I can handle it :)  I am almost 32 weeks preg and I have a two and a half year old who is no where near weaning.  He slowed down a lot when my milk dried up, but that was only for about 3 weeks or so until my colostrum came in and he has been super happy ever since.  He had nightweaned on his own and was sleeping through the night, but has regressed lately.  I am terrified and excited about it at the same time.  Just like having another baby in general. 

 

I have heard both on these forums and from friends in real life that siblings that tandemed had less rivalry than those who didn't.  And that it is really really hard, but so incredibly worth it.  I really think that my DS will *need* to tandem in order to have a remotely smooth transition to older brother. 

 

Good luck to all of us!! And thanks to the BTDT mamas sharing your stories. 


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