Just Got Chewed Out During my Appt... And Walked Out - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 41 Old 05-16-2013, 01:21 PM
 
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HAHAHA! MareBear, that is priceless. She maybe should go work at the DMV.

 

OP- I've been watching this thread because I told my MW that I would consent to a 20wk ultrasound for her benefit. I'm doing almost no testing (not being weighed,  no dating scans, no urine tests, only the initial blood draw) and after discussing the anatomy scan with her, I thought it was the right thing to do for everyone's peace of mind. DH is really looking forward to it, too. I'm 14wks 1day and so I'm beginning to look down the barrel of this scan and I'm trying to prepare myself for it to be horrible. I hate doctors, I hate hospitals, I hate medical centers, and I don't even get massages because the idea of a stranger touching me gets me very upset: i.e. first MW appt my BP was 140/90 largely because I was scared about a MW I hadn't previously met putting her hands on me, second appt BP was 122/75 because it was the head MW who I had met and dealt with before and I was that much less afraid. I know I'm going to be a mess at the scan and I want to have my head in the right space to be able to stand up for myself and not get into 'victim' head space and just lay there and cry if I'm mistreated.

 

All of this to say: it SUCKS that you were treated that way by someone who is supposedly a trained professional. If she needed you to be still and not do anything, she could very easily have volunteered, "Baby is in the perfect position right now, hold still for a minute," calmly and pleasantly. I don't know of a mama who wouldn't be fine with that. And also thank you for sharing this rotten experience with the rest of us. If I were to be similarly blindsided it would have been horribly traumatic; now I am prepared for the fact that this heinous treatment is a possibility. I am so sorry this happened to you.

 

-MQ


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#32 of 41 Old 05-16-2013, 08:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by M.Q. View Post

HAHAHA! MareBear, that is priceless. She maybe should go work at the DMV.

 

OP- I've been watching this thread because I told my MW that I would consent to a 20wk ultrasound for her benefit. I'm doing almost no testing (not being weighed,  no dating scans, no urine tests, only the initial blood draw) and after discussing the anatomy scan with her, I thought it was the right thing to do for everyone's peace of mind. DH is really looking forward to it, too. I'm 14wks 1day and so I'm beginning to look down the barrel of this scan and I'm trying to prepare myself for it to be horrible. I hate doctors, I hate hospitals, I hate medical centers, and I don't even get massages because the idea of a stranger touching me gets me very upset: i.e. first MW appt my BP was 140/90 largely because I was scared about a MW I hadn't previously met putting her hands on me, second appt BP was 122/75 because it was the head MW who I had met and dealt with before and I was that much less afraid. I know I'm going to be a mess at the scan and I want to have my head in the right space to be able to stand up for myself and not get into 'victim' head space and just lay there and cry if I'm mistreated.

 

All of this to say: it SUCKS that you were treated that way by someone who is supposedly a trained professional. If she needed you to be still and not do anything, she could very easily have volunteered, "Baby is in the perfect position right now, hold still for a minute," calmly and pleasantly. I don't know of a mama who wouldn't be fine with that. And also thank you for sharing this rotten experience with the rest of us. If I were to be similarly blindsided it would have been horribly traumatic; now I am prepared for the fact that this heinous treatment is a possibility. I am so sorry this happened to you.

 

-MQ

 

MQ,

 

I can understand your fears, but rest assured the vast majority of these techs are super sweet.  In fact, my last visit for the rescheduled ultrasound was with a wonderfully human person who was gentle and caring.  Try to imagine the visit; visualize it as being positive and the tech being a close friend or relative. I think with your husband by your side and expectations for something positive, the odds are in your favor. And if anyone is rude to you, what is the worst that can happen during an ultrasound?  You do exactly what I did; just walk out!  

 

But do try to imagine the best case scenario because that is what is likely to happen anyways.  If yu are really nervous, call the office ahead of time and ask them to schedule you with the nicest tech and ask them to first confirm the heartbeat when they start.  All the best:-)

 

Thanks to many others here who posted their own support and experiences.  I do read it all.

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#33 of 41 Old 05-17-2013, 08:09 AM
 
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Hugs, MQ.  Know that I am offering much mental support from afar when you go in for that ultrasound.  And I echo what demeter88 said wholeheartedly.  Visualize the best possible experience.  Perhaps you could let them know ahead of time what your situation is?  They may have ways to help you feel more comfortable.  I'm just a couple of days behind you so this is also my first rodeo.  Just an idea.  smile.gif


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#34 of 41 Old 05-17-2013, 10:03 AM
 
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M.Q.-I would definitely let the office or individual know ahead a time about your aversion to being touched and medical intervention in general.  I agree that most tech by and large are sweet and very professional and polite, and knowing ahead of time of your anxiety, would help them to know to be especially delicate in the manner in which they approach you with.


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#35 of 41 Old 05-17-2013, 12:19 PM
 
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I've been watching for updates, hoping the second try went well. I'm so glad it did!

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#36 of 41 Old 05-17-2013, 12:30 PM
 
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M.Q.--I actually found my ultrasounds very relaxing.  I was lying down and they turn down the lights so you can see the screen well.  There isn't a lot of talking because they are looking for specific things they have to measure.  I could have fallen asleep.  Plus, you get to see your baby.  That's pretty cool.  This could be a good chance to practice your breathing and relaxation techniques you will use for labor.




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#37 of 41 Old 05-17-2013, 06:32 PM - Thread Starter
 
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M.Q.--I actually found my ultrasounds very relaxing.  I was lying down and they turn down the lights so you can see the screen well.  There isn't a lot of talking because they are looking for specific things they have to measure.  I could have fallen asleep.  Plus, you get to see your baby.  That's pretty cool.  This could be a good chance to practice your breathing and relaxation techniques you will use for labor.

 

 

Yep, ditto for me.  It's supposed to be a very relaxing experience and all about the bebe; I was very fortunate this 2nd time around:-)

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#38 of 41 Old 05-17-2013, 07:14 PM
 
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During the 'gender' scan I had - the male tech asked me what hospital I was going to use for birth. After replying, he said: "That's the worst hospital in the region...." Was rendered speechless. Complained later to my midwife, who suggested I fill out the feedback/complaints form I had picked up on the way out of that appointment....but just didn't get around to filling it in. Should have.

 

Some people shouldn't do some jobs.

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#39 of 41 Old 05-18-2013, 02:09 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Grover View Post

During the 'gender' scan I had - the male tech asked me what hospital I was going to use for birth. After replying, he said: "That's the worst hospital in the region...." Was rendered speechless. Complained later to my midwife, who suggested I fill out the feedback/complaints form I had picked up on the way out of that appointment....but just didn't get around to filling it in. Should have.

 

Some people shouldn't do some jobs.

 

 

I agree, that's weird and so inappropriate.  Although there is a  hospital near me that is so bad I want to stand outside and warn people, but I don't:-)

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#40 of 41 Old 05-27-2013, 07:11 AM
 
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Demeter, can you switch ob? I had a horrible exp with a local ob and hospital (same county as you) and switched to a mw practice. I'd have ealked out too.

MQ-there are some real nice techs out there. The first ones we had were ok, but the second and this last one were super nice.

That's just crazy for that tech, babies move all the time. At our u/s the tech had a hard time because baby was moving so much. I have had to drink oj before though to get movement.
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#41 of 41 Old 06-02-2013, 09:04 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Grover View Post

During the 'gender' scan I had - the male tech asked me what hospital I was going to use for birth. After replying, he said: "That's the worst hospital in the region...." Was rendered speechless. Complained later to my midwife, who suggested I fill out the feedback/complaints form I had picked up on the way out of that appointment....but just didn't get around to filling it in. Should have.

Some people shouldn't do some jobs.
i agree that would be hard to hear...but i would ask him why he feels that way....he is in the healthcare field and maybe he knows something you should know about that hospital?
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