Nice things said to pregnant women - Mothering Forums

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Old 07-15-2013, 10:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Ok, so everyone has their pet peeves for what *not* to say, but what have you heard from family, friends and strangers that came as music to your ears? 

 

From my mom: "I want to come and help after the baby is born, and I don't care that I have to sleep on an air mattress, on the floor, without A/C."

 

From my husband, while looking at me naked: "Now I understand why so many cultures' goddess figures were pregnant women" -- hot! 

 

From my friend: "I think it's terrible how american culture wants to leave women to mother alone and without any support, and makes women feel bad for wanting to talk about their kids and share their stories, and for needing help." -- only amazing to hear because she is my most supportive friend even though she has no kids yet herself, so I know she "walks the talk" about supporting mothers. 

 

From my dad, who I worried would be judgey about our unplanned, out-of-wedlock conception, and who would be jaded about his 17th grandchild: A big smile, LOTS of excitement and interest in our new family, and seeing him go for a walk with my partner smiling and getting along without judging our sinful lives :). 


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Old 07-15-2013, 12:36 PM
 
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Oh, this is good practice for me.  I've gotten a lot of really awful comments, but have also heard some lovely stuff and need to do better about focusing on the positive.

 

When we announced the pregnancy to my partner's dad, who is already pretty non-emotive, a man of few words, and pretty jaded after 8 kids of his own, 10 grandkids, and 2 great-grankids, he responded:  "Having a child is the greatest, unexpected joy one can have in life."

 

From my cousin when I made a broader family announcement at 12 weeks: "I've always thought you would be a wonderful mother." *This is really the greatest thing a 1st time mom can hear, but it seems that mothers-to-be who are unmarried hear it less.

 

From my brother: "That's great! Are you eating good food?  Do you need me to send you money for good food?" *Any genuine expressions of someone wanting to help are great.

 

I don't have one specific statement, but my parents have just been overwhelmingly supportive, positive and excited about the baby.  This has really helped me endure all the negative people out there.

 

And here's one that just made me laugh:

Sitting outside with DP, his friend and his friend's grandma one evening

DP's friend's grandma: Can you believe it's already July? The year is more than halfway gone and what have any of us done? Nothing.
DP's friend: I dunno, these two (me and DP) seem to have gotten some pretty important stuff done this year.


Excited, anxious and proud to be pregnant for the first time! My partner and I can't wait to meet the little boy sometime around Sept 20th.

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Old 07-15-2013, 02:11 PM
 
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I've gotten a lot of nice comments about how cute I look with my belly.  That's certainly nice to hear when you certainly don't *feel* cute waddling around...I'm usually not so shallow, really.  ROTFLMAO.gif


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Old 07-15-2013, 03:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
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lilmamita, that's awesome stuff coming from your family :) Funny how those old, quiet men can surprise you! 

 

GISDiva, that is always nice to hear :) 


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Old 07-15-2013, 03:06 PM
 
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When I was pregnant I got a few strangers say how much joy I had coming.  It was such a refreshing change from "you know you'll never sleep again, right?"  And the first strangers were right.  I've had more joy since she was born than I thought possible.  love.gif


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Old 07-15-2013, 04:27 PM
 
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This was told to me third hand, and it made me cry.

 

I have been prevented from doing my favorite activity because it's physically demanding and some of the others involved fear what might happen if they were to run into me/baby at high speed. An awesome woman in a position of power went to the person in authority and encouraged him to change his mind about barring me. He hummed and hawed about 'what if something happened and she said back to him, "You have no idea. Women are strong. If she says she can do it, then she can do it, and she'll be fine."

 

It's awesome to have people stand up for you.

 

I also love hearing that I 'look great'. And had another woman due around the same time as I am say I looked 'tiny'. I like 'tiny'. 😃


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Old 07-16-2013, 01:38 AM
 
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M.Q.--you've made me very curious about your favorite activity. Roller derby? Ice hockey? Rugby?

I had a friend who expressed that he feels very attracted towards pregnant women. Seeing them on the street he cant help but stare open-mouthed and revel in their amazing beauty. This is how he put it. His perspective made me feel like a sexy goddess while pregnant, which is a nice change from feeling large and frumpy.
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Old 07-16-2013, 08:05 AM
 
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My husband tells me how much he loves how I look pregnant. He drives for a living in the downtown core here where there are a lot of pedestrians and he will tell me about the pregnant women he sees and how cute they are with their bellies. It may seem odd, but I love to hear how much he loves the pregnant figure and I almost wish he would tell the women how beautiful they are (although that may not always go over well!). With so much pressure on women and their appearance and weight it is often hard for me to feel beautiful when I feel so big, and hearing from him how much he loves it makes me feel really good and sexy.

 

I also have a colleague at work who told me that she can't wait for me to have my baby so she can stop in and hold the baby so I can pee and shower every now and then :) Oh the luxury.

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Old 07-16-2013, 01:32 PM
 
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Primordial: You guessed correctly. I'm a skating official for flat track roller derby 😁


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Old 07-16-2013, 03:33 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by M.Q. View Post

Primordial: You guessed correctly. I'm a skating official for flat track roller derby 😁

Yay, i guessed right smile.gif That sounds like a lot of fun, whenever i watch it i think about trying it. At the end of the day, though, my most strenuous activities are tae bo and disc golf lol.gif so i chicken out.
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