Grad Club: Where the group discussion continues after the ONE thread! - Page 26 - Mothering Forums

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#751 of 1252 Old 05-15-2014, 07:57 AM
 
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I'm pretty upset with my sister. A while ago, she asked what names we picked out for the baby. Boy would be David Alan. Girl would be Madison Lesh. Apparently she is furious with us about us using Lesh because I was a baby and our grandmother in dad's side passed away. There was a huge fight, and I'm pretty much done. While people should be honored, they're instead giving us hell. Idk what to do. It has me very upset that she feels I'm insulting her and making her feel all sorts of other things. But at the same time, it's a middle name and I have a right to chose whatever I want to. It's bad enough she picked a fight with me, especially when told not to because of my blood pressure issue. I'm scared that will affect today and give me another high read.

I'm hungry, so I need to go stuff my stomach.

It always sucks when siblings act like that! When I told my sister about my miscarriage she was so upset that I was even pregnant to begin with I was terrified to tell her I was pregnant this time. She flipped out on me saying she wasn't ready for another niece or nephew. I was so hurt that she was making it all about her and never even said sorry for my loss. I was so upset and hurt about it that I was scared to tell her I am pregnant again. I had my mom and dad tell her. She is of course excited now.
But your sister has absolutely NO right to get upset with you over what you and your DH decide to name the baby. It is the decision of you and DH not her. Don't let her influence your choice. If you want to name your baby that and feel it is a way for you to honor the name then so be it. She will have to build a bridge and get over it. As for her intentionally upsetting you, that's BS! I have to take lebetalol for my BP to be able to carry this pregnancy safely. Please don't let her get to you like that. Calmly let her know that if she can't speak to you calmly without getting you upset or raising your BP then she is not welcome while you are pregnant because she is toxic and can harm your pregnancy.
Hope things get better Hun.
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#752 of 1252 Old 05-15-2014, 08:31 AM
 
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wow, i would be upset too.  it's a family name, and often more than one baby will have a grandparent's name, especially as a middle name.  in my family, Joseph is a very common middle name, and of course i wouldn't be upset if my brother decided to use it too.   is your sister wanting to use that name herself??  i hope your blood pressure comes down... take some time to rest and relax and (try) to forget about it.

 

AFM:  i had my second beta blood test this morning.  i'm waiting for the results, which probably wont' be until tomorrow... ack!!!   my first beta was 162, so i guess we're looking for anything over 300.

No clue if she wanted to use the name.  There's no reason she can't ever use it.  She used our grandmother's first name for her daughter but I didn't get upset.  I thought it was a beautiful idea.  I hope you get awesome betas!

 

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It always sucks when siblings act like that! When I told my sister about my miscarriage she was so upset that I was even pregnant to begin with I was terrified to tell her I was pregnant this time. She flipped out on me saying she wasn't ready for another niece or nephew. I was so hurt that she was making it all about her and never even said sorry for my loss. I was so upset and hurt about it that I was scared to tell her I am pregnant again. I had my mom and dad tell her. She is of course excited now.
But your sister has absolutely NO right to get upset with you over what you and your DH decide to name the baby. It is the decision of you and DH not her. Don't let her influence your choice. If you want to name your baby that and feel it is a way for you to honor the name then so be it. She will have to build a bridge and get over it. As for her intentionally upsetting you, that's BS! I have to take lebetalol for my BP to be able to carry this pregnancy safely. Please don't let her get to you like that. Calmly let her know that if she can't speak to you calmly without getting you upset or raising your BP then she is not welcome while you are pregnant because she is toxic and can harm your pregnancy.
Hope things get better Hun.

When I miscarried after Christmas, she told us it was for the better.  Whatever.  She's self centered, so we expected it.  And when we announced our pregnancy, the first thing she did was make it all about her.  "Now you can't come to my wedding!  You guys should've waited."  There was a point we thought she was going to tell us to abort this pregnancy.  And she's very bipolar about it.  One moment she's all wanting to buy baby things.  The next she is angry because we can't travel to her, and I won't go live near her to help her with her business.  She had the guts to tell me to name our daughter after the grandmother who raised me if I "must" keep a family name in the loop.  She's just been evil and malicious, and blamed my name choice on her needing more therapy.

 

Hopefully they don't want to give me something for the BP.  I really hate taking anything beyond vitamins.

 

Thanks for the supporting thoughts.


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#753 of 1252 Old 05-15-2014, 11:31 AM
 
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Yeah, it's best you avoid her all together if that's going on. I was upset about taking the BP meds at first but it's definitely helping me. Hope things get better
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#754 of 1252 Old 05-15-2014, 11:51 AM
 
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Hi ladies! My appt went good today! Had a pap and blood work. I won't know the beta unless I call and ask or something's wrong I guess. They have never called and told me in the past. My uterus is like totally misaligned but this happened when I was pregnant with dd. She said she's not worried. The worse thing that happens is at around 12 weeks it will push on the bladder stopping you from urinating and they go up there and move it! Good news is she said Im a perfect candidate for a vbac!! She was totally supportive of it. I declined the early us and she was Ok with that too. She said as long as I was sure about the date of my last mp!

DH 31; Me 30; DD 6; DS 1; Baby boy due Dec 17th

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#755 of 1252 Old 05-15-2014, 11:52 AM
 
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Oh she gave me zofran too. I've never taken it with any other pregnancies but I'm going to this time bc I need to start functioning with these other two little ones!!

DH 31; Me 30; DD 6; DS 1; Baby boy due Dec 17th

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#756 of 1252 Old 05-15-2014, 12:44 PM
 
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No clue if she wanted to use the name.  There's no reason she can't ever use it.  She used our grandmother's first name for her daughter but I didn't get upset.  I thought it was a beautiful idea.  I hope you get awesome betas!

 

When I miscarried after Christmas, she told us it was for the better.  Whatever.  She's self centered, so we expected it.  And when we announced our pregnancy, the first thing she did was make it all about her.  "Now you can't come to my wedding!  You guys should've waited."  There was a point we thought she was going to tell us to abort this pregnancy.  And she's very bipolar about it.  One moment she's all wanting to buy baby things.  The next she is angry because we can't travel to her, and I won't go live near her to help her with her business.  She had the guts to tell me to name our daughter after the grandmother who raised me if I "must" keep a family name in the loop.  She's just been evil and malicious, and blamed my name choice on her needing more therapy.

 

Hopefully they don't want to give me something for the BP.  I really hate taking anything beyond vitamins.

 

Thanks for the supporting thoughts.


I think your sister's reaction is absolutely horrible and selfish. She has a lot of issues to work on.

I've started to "reward" people with information. If someone treats me with respect I give them more information. If they are rude, dismissive or selfish I don't let them into my life as much anymore. One very dear friend of mine reacted rudely when my husband and I decided to get married - it was a reflection of her own doubts and struggles with her marriage, and I knew this at the time. She offered no support, congratulations or anything positive, so I have not been very forthcoming with her regarding anything too personal. I'm not punishing her for having problems in her own life, I'm just choosing carefully and wisely who I can and can't share with and recently she has not been on the "share list". I understand it's hard to cut your sister out though, and I have by no means cut out this friend of mine, I've just kept her at a bit more distance.

I've chosen to share my pregnancy news with people I am fairly certain will be supportive, positive and helpful, especially early on when I can chose who to tell. Once I start showing that's a mute point, but my life is much calmer and more positive when I chose to keep closest.


newly married and pregnant, due January 2015.
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#757 of 1252 Old 05-15-2014, 01:17 PM
 
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Originally Posted by badwolf092087 View Post

"Apparently she is furious with us about us using Lesh because I was a baby and our grandmother in dad's side passed away."

I don't even get what she is mad about?
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Originally Posted by apeydef View Post

Hi ladies! My appt went good today! Had a pap and blood work. I won't know the beta unless I call and ask or something's wrong I guess. They have never called and told me in the past. My uterus is like totally misaligned but this happened when I was pregnant with dd. She said she's not worried. The worse thing that happens is at around 12 weeks it will push on the bladder stopping you from urinating and they go up there and move it! Good news is she said Im a perfect candidate for a vbac!! She was totally supportive of it. I declined the early us and she was Ok with that too. She said as long as I was sure about the date of my last mp!


Yay!!! Congrats on being a VBAC candidate!!! Me too!
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I think your sister's reaction is absolutely horrible and selfish. She has a lot of issues to work on.
I've started to "reward" people with information. If someone treats me with respect I give them more information. If they are rude, dismissive or selfish I don't let them into my life as much anymore. One very dear friend of mine reacted rudely when my husband and I decided to get married - it was a reflection of her own doubts and struggles with her marriage, and I knew this at the time. She offered no support, congratulations or anything positive, so I have not been very forthcoming with her regarding anything too personal. I'm not punishing her for having problems in her own life, I'm just choosing carefully and wisely who I can and can't share with and recently she has not been on the "share list". I understand it's hard to cut your sister out though, and I have by no means cut out this friend of mine, I've just kept her at a bit more distance.
I've chosen to share my pregnancy news with people I am fairly certain will be supportive, positive and helpful, especially early on when I can chose who to tell. Once I start showing that's a mute point, but my life is much calmer and more positive when I chose to keep closest.

I like that idea to reward ppl with info! Bravo!

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#758 of 1252 Old 05-15-2014, 01:31 PM
 
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@badwolf092087is this the sister that's always mean and rude? Or the one you get along with. This seems ridiculous she's mad!

DH 31; Me 30; DD 6; DS 1; Baby boy due Dec 17th

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#759 of 1252 Old 05-15-2014, 02:54 PM
 
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Hi everyone! 

 

I was in the TTC One group back in September/October last year. I am due with a baby girl in about 5 weeks! Was browsing the TTC thread and found this new thread. Really happy to see so many other graduates and find a way to stay in touch! :love


surf.gif31 year-old mom with an endlessly active five-year-old boy jog.gif (6/3/08)  waterbirth.jpg  delayedvax.gif

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#760 of 1252 Old 05-15-2014, 05:12 PM
 
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I don't even get what she is mad about?

She's being self centered among many other things.  Her arguments are really invalid, and she kept trying to turn every bit of the fight into a who had it worse growing up competition.  

 

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@badwolf092087is this the sister that's always mean and rude? Or the one you get along with. This seems ridiculous she's mad!

The one that's always mean and rude.  I've been trying to have a decent relationship with her, but it seems to be failing me.

 

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Hi everyone! 

 

I was in the TTC One group back in September/October last year. I am due with a baby girl in about 5 weeks! Was browsing the TTC thread and found this new thread. Really happy to see so many other graduates and find a way to stay in touch! :love

Welcome and congrats!  What type of birth are you doing?


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#761 of 1252 Old 05-15-2014, 05:28 PM
 
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@badwolf092087, thank you, same to you! I am planning my second hospital water birth with my midwife.

surf.gif31 year-old mom with an endlessly active five-year-old boy jog.gif (6/3/08)  waterbirth.jpg  delayedvax.gif

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#762 of 1252 Old 05-15-2014, 06:40 PM
 
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Sarah, I'm sorry, I don't know you or your sister, so maybe it isn't my place to say, but your sister sounds like she needs a swift kick in the *ahem.
You and your DH should name your baby whatever name you want! I'm sorry you have that toxicity to deal with. I hope she chills out.

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#763 of 1252 Old 05-15-2014, 09:51 PM
 
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Thanks. Hubby and I are keeping Lesh for a middle name no matter what. And I talked to my father. He agrees with disowning my sister, especially because of things she said about him that are lies. Her adopted family convinced her of events that never happened, and we are just done trying. I'll do the right thing and invite her to the shower but I don't expect her there.

I forgot to mention that I had my biweekly ultrasound with another doctor at the practice. She was awesome. I got stuck with the crappy ultrasound machine, but muffin is rolling and kicking. She said that indicates smart as proven by studies. And apparently the genetic testing people called the practice. So far numbers are good, and the early scan showed possibly boy. I'll get a definite answer in 4 weeks or so if muffin will stop rolling with every image they try to take. Either way, I'll be happy.

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#764 of 1252 Old 05-16-2014, 12:47 AM
 
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@badwolf
Glad your appointment went well. Also glad you and DH are deciding to keep the name you've chosen. It's your baby so it's your decision not hers. Chin up
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#765 of 1252 Old 05-16-2014, 07:27 AM
 
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Bad wolf so glad everything is going well!

I called to get my beta number from yesterday. What should it be at for 9 weeks?

DH 31; Me 30; DD 6; DS 1; Baby boy due Dec 17th

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#766 of 1252 Old 05-16-2014, 07:40 AM
 
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Bad wolf so glad everything is going well!

I called to get my beta number from yesterday. What should it be at for 9 weeks?
3 weeks LMP 5 – 50 mIU/ml
4 weeks LMP 5 – 426 mIU/ml
5 weeks LMP 18 – 7,340 mIU/ml
6 weeks LMP 1,080 – 56,500 mIU/ml
7-8 weeks LMP 7, 650 – 229,000 mIU/ml
9-12 weeks LMP 25,700 – 288,000 mIU/ml
13-16 weeks LMP 13,300 – 254,000 mIU/ml
17-24 weeks LMP 4,060 – 165,400 mIU/ml
25-40 weeks LMP 3,640 – 117,000 mIU/ml

 

Please remember that HCG levels vary widely, as you can see from the ranges given. What matters as much as the actual numbers, if not more, is the rate at which your HCG is increasing.


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#767 of 1252 Old 05-16-2014, 08:10 AM
 
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Well this is my one and only beta test do I won't know how it's increasing. Thank you for the info. I wanted to see if it's at least in range. Haven't heard back yet.

DH 31; Me 30; DD 6; DS 1; Baby boy due Dec 17th

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#768 of 1252 Old 05-16-2014, 08:16 AM
 
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finally got my second beta results!!!  they are more than doubled!!!  from 162 to 533!  YIPPEEEEEE


Momma to K ('01), E ('03) and A ('07)
Acting as a Gestational Surrogate for my cousin, EDD Jan 17th
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#769 of 1252 Old 05-16-2014, 08:31 AM
 
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finally got my second beta results!!!  they are more than doubled!!!  from 162 to 533!  YIPPEEEEEE
Grats! I have to ask at my next appt why if they consider me a high risk pregnancy they aren't doing another ultrasound prior to 18weeks. Kind of has me confused. Hopefully baby (butter bean as my friend refers to it) will still have a strong heart beat when I go back on the 6th
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#770 of 1252 Old 05-16-2014, 08:51 AM
 
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@Water Mama I think you and I were in the same Due Date club with our boys LOL You were June 08 and I was August 08 LOL


Me (32) - DH (38) - DS (6) - Baby Boy born 11/4/2014 at 33 weeks and 1 day - Atlanta, GA

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#771 of 1252 Old 05-16-2014, 09:33 AM
 
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Ok got my beta back! 221,611 yeah!!! They said that's really good!

DH 31; Me 30; DD 6; DS 1; Baby boy due Dec 17th

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#772 of 1252 Old 05-16-2014, 10:23 AM
 
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Grats! I have to ask at my next appt why if they consider me a high risk pregnancy they aren't doing another ultrasound prior to 18weeks. Kind of has me confused. Hopefully baby (butter bean as my friend refers to it) will still have a strong heart beat when I go back on the 6th

Idk but I am personally weary of frequent ultrasounds unless it's necessary bc there are risks to baby. If you are uncomfortable I'm sure you could request one and see what their response it. It was crazy making for me to wait from when I found outat 13DPO until 10weeks to hear the heartbeat after just having a MC.

Me , DH , DS 11/11, M/C 08/13 , #2 EDD 10/11/14 
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Idk but I am personally weary of frequent ultrasounds unless it's necessary bc there are risks to baby. If you are uncomfortable I'm sure you could request one and see what their response it. It was crazy making for me to wait from when I found outat 13DPO until 10weeks to hear the heartbeat after just having a MC.
I know my next appt. is in four weeks, I'll be 13 weeks. Had a mc at 12 weeks before, so it's gonna be a long 4 weeks until I can hear that heartbeat.

DH 31; Me 30; DD 6; DS 1; Baby boy due Dec 17th

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#774 of 1252 Old 05-16-2014, 10:55 AM
 
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I know my next appt. is in four weeks, I'll be 13 weeks. Had a mc at 12 weeks before, so it's gonna be a long 4 weeks until I can hear that heartbeat.

Ugh I know that feeling and I'm really sorry you have to wait. Do something to fill your time and mind! If that's even possible!!!

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#775 of 1252 Old 05-16-2014, 11:58 AM
 
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Idk but I am personally weary of frequent ultrasounds unless it's necessary bc there are risks to baby. If you are uncomfortable I'm sure you could request one and see what their response it. It was crazy making for me to wait from when I found outat 13DPO until 10weeks to hear the heartbeat after just having a MC.
I'm high risk due to high BP and a MC in December. There really isn't a risk to baby with an ultrasound. Not that has been proven medically. An ultrasound is simply sound waves sent through the body that bounce back to reflect an image on the screen. The same as sonar for dolphins. I am a registered X-ray tech. I am just nervous as to why they didn't order one seeing as they have me classified as high risk.
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#776 of 1252 Old 05-16-2014, 12:02 PM
 
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I'm high risk due to high BP and a MC in December. There really isn't a risk to baby with an ultrasound. Not that has been proven medically. An ultrasound is simply sound waves sent through the body that bounce back to reflect an image on the screen. The same as sonar for dolphins. I am a registered X-ray tech. I am just nervous as to why they didn't order one seeing as they have me classified as high risk.

I personally would question the people until they gave in to my demands.  If you were around here, I'd recommend my practice to you.  They will see you as often as you want, with no longer then 4 weeks in between scans.  And they would answer all of your questions without hesitation.


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#777 of 1252 Old 05-17-2014, 06:01 PM
 
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Hope everyone is having a good weekend.
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#778 of 1252 Old 05-17-2014, 06:12 PM
 
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How are all you ladies doing today?  I had a pretty decent day so far.  Went to Target, Buffalo Wild Wings, and a local park with one of my friends and her daughter.  It was a great 5 hours.  And exhausting!  Keeping up with a 3 year old is tiring sometimes.  Her daughter is the sweetest though.  She kept going up to my belly and patting it, and asking how he was doing.  We don't refer to the baby as a boy around her, so she definitely is using her imagination.  And she told us she has enough friends who are girls, so we need to give her a friend who is a boy.  She cracks me up.

 

Now I'm exhausted and holding out for hubby to get home from work.  Longest 2 1/2 hours of my life!  I hit the 12 week milestone today.  I'm excited and he will be greeted with a glass of champagne when he walks in.  This is a big day for me, and it's such a small yet large accomplishment.


Sarah & DH Alan 
 
Our angel in heaven, DS Connor 10/2/09 to 10/5/09  
2 pups, 11 cats  and always rescuing more!  RIP Momma Furby </3
Baby #2, a GIRL!, due Nov 29th, 2014  

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#779 of 1252 Old 05-17-2014, 07:52 PM
 
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Originally Posted by badwolf092087 View Post

How are all you ladies doing today?  I had a pretty decent day so far.  Went to Target, Buffalo Wild Wings, and a local park with one of my friends and her daughter.  It was a great 5 hours.  And exhausting!  Keeping up with a 3 year old is tiring sometimes.  Her daughter is the sweetest though.  She kept going up to my belly and patting it, and asking how he was doing.  We don't refer to the baby as a boy around her, so she definitely is using her imagination.  And she told us she has enough friends who are girls, so we need to give her a friend who is a boy.  She cracks me up.

Now I'm exhausted and holding out for hubby to get home from work.  Longest 2 1/2 hours of my life!  I hit the 12 week milestone today.  I'm excited and he will be greeted with a glass of champagne when he walks in.  This is a big day for me, and it's such a small yet large accomplishment.

Sounds like a good day!
HUGE congrats on hitting that 12week mark!

SAHM (32)  Married to a bearded hunk (28) , DS  11/00, DD  06/09, two  in 2013,the final piece to our puzzle   is due 12/14
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#780 of 1252 Old 05-18-2014, 07:37 AM
 
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Grats on hitting 12weeks! I hit 9 weeks today. I can't believe how fast this is going!
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