Fertility Challenged Graduates Thread - Spring/Summer 2014 - Page 16 - Mothering Forums

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#451 of 810 Old 08-01-2014, 05:47 PM
 
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Despite reading along every few days, I've been way too paranoid to post here since my first scan. As it turns out, all my follow up scans after the first one have been good. I'm 12 weeks today.

My NT scan is booked for the 6th and I am nervous as hell about it. My primary fear of course, is that the baby won't be alive. I'm also terrified of genetic abnormalities. We've been on the wrong side of the odds for so long and on so many occasions, I feel like if the baby IS alive, then there will almost certainly be something wrong. Finally, if the baby is alive, and normal, then I have to have a cerclage, which has it's own risk of causing miscarriage. I feel as though there is no way I'm going to make it through this next week without some bad news. It's excruciating.

The hardest part is that my husband is excited. Really excited. He came to my last scan, which they did in 3D, and he was just blown away. He hasn't been emotionally invested in any of our other pregnancies since the first, in 2009. And now he is, and I'm so worried that he is going to be crushed.

Apologies for the AAM.
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#452 of 810 Old 08-01-2014, 06:32 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Silver - Good to see you again! And congrats!

Milk - Thanks for coming out of hiding. I'm so excited, too! But if I were you, I'd probably be a complete mess. Why the cerclage? Do you have issues with your cervix? Or are they just trying anything/everything to help you get this baby to term?
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#453 of 810 Old 08-01-2014, 06:34 PM
 
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Fertility Challenged Graduates Thread - Spring/Summer 2014

Wow. @Milk8shake I'm coming back from vacation. (Fishing in Ontario, Canada. Thankyou all my Canadian friends for having great fishing!)

I'm floored to read your update. I'm holding on with my fingernails and I hope your little bean is too. Do the have a MaterniT21 type test? You could do a quick blood test and get some answers on if there's genetic problems.

So, when was your last u/s? Do you have a Doppler?

Wow. Just wow. Keep us updated. I'm sending all the hopes and prayers I have in the world to you.

Hello to everyone else! I'll do updates soon. Nothing new with me.


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Mom to AJ 4/07 and Genevieve 5/09

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#454 of 810 Old 08-01-2014, 06:48 PM
 
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@Milk8shake 12 weeks!!!!!!!!! That is so wonderful. I'm happy for you. We were suppose to be bump buddies as well. I'm 12 weeks!
@Silverbird
Congrats on your bfp!!!!! We used donor eggs as well and dh sperm!!! Yay, it's such a different journey using donor eggs and exciting. I have many questions for you!!

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#455 of 810 Old 08-01-2014, 10:59 PM
 
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Thanks guys
@Monkey - cerclage is because my unicornuate uterus puts me at a high risk of PTL and incompetent cervix. I've also had five curettes and a hysteroscopy, so there's a good chance those procedures might have weakened it.

@X - I've had scans at 7, 8, 9 and my last scan was at 10+2 (this is the longest I have ever gone without a scan!). I don't have a doppler, but if by some miracle the baby is okay on Wednesday, I plan to get one. We do have the genetic testing here, but it's pretty new, and they don't consider it diagnostic. It costs about $800 (all oop) and takes about 10 days. I'm waiting on the outcome of the scan to decide if it's "worth it".
@Tracy - congrats on 12 weeks Hope you are feeling well!

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#456 of 810 Old 08-02-2014, 08:04 AM
 
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@Milk8shake
I bought a doppler and it came early this week. It picks up heartbeat above 12 weeks. Only I just concentrated on finding the heartbeat cause we all know what it sounds like and I found a heartbeat in the lower right of my belly.! We I looked at the LCD of the doppler it does not even detect it ! Maybe because it's really light. I did turn the volume up. I got my iPhone and tried to time and it was about 160 beats. I actually lost count because the beat is so fast.
I will be praying and all I can do for the 6 th. Please keep us posted as you have now pulled us in and we are all rooting for you like before, okay?
@Xerxella
How as vacation? Do tell even if you think you have nothing to say. It is nice to see you around. You mere presence gives this thread an uplift!!!!! Hugs! I think I am so use to hanging out with you on the fertility challenged thread and I realized that we were always so busy there and because something was always happening and then we got pregnant and nothing! Boring boring and just anxious about our babies

Afm
I had a dream I was still at my old clinic and they thawed 3 of my embryos and the the embryos did not make it. I was so so upset and was convinced it was the clinics fault. I was so depressed kinda like last summer. It was weird. Maybe I'm having anxiety about the house? Baby?
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#457 of 810 Old 08-02-2014, 03:46 PM
 
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Monkey: thanks good to see you here too.

Tracy: thanks and congratulations to. You too. Ask away though dont know if I can help.

Milkshake I hope things go ok for you.

Anyone know if rcr or blue ezzey still check in here? There was a while when it looked like none of us would get pregnant but their babies are growing up now!

Kewpie good to see you again can't believe your heading for more twins! Congratulations
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#458 of 810 Old 08-02-2014, 07:07 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Silver - @rcr pops in from time to time. It's been a bit longer since we heard from blue.
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#459 of 810 Old 08-03-2014, 03:12 AM
 
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Milk8Shake, I'm sending you tons of love and hope!! I'll be thinking of you on Wednesday! I'm sure it must be super hard to see DH get excited and to be a ball of nerves and worry. Big hugs!!!

Silver bird, I'm so happy for you! Congrats!!!

Our little miracles are here!!joy.gif
energy.gif DD Born 7/15/11 biggrinbounce.gif DS Born 4/3/13
love.giflove.gif Keep growing healthy and strong, beautiful little fighter babies!!!

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#460 of 810 Old 08-03-2014, 08:24 AM
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I saw my name tagged (thanks Monkey).

Silver - YAY!!!!!! Congrats. I am so happy for you. I used donor embryos too.

Milk - yay!!!! 12 weeks is amazing! is that the farthest you have gotten? Just take a deep breath and take it one day at a time. Before you know it (hopefully) those days will turn into nine months!

Sorry I am not around much anymore. It was such a horrible time of my life. If was combined with taking care of my mom, who had Amzheimer's (she died almost a year exactly before baby girl was born). I just need to put it all behind me. DH and I are still in the process of healing our marriage, which IF took a huge toll on. Sometimes I wonder if we are really going to recover or just end up getting a divorce. We just got in these angry habits and it is really hard to break them now. I kept putting off working on us because of IF and my mom, and now so much time has gone by... It is all so hard. Also, I find myself wanting another baby again, which I know is impossible, I am lucky I got little girl at all. I think I was in the habit of wanting another for so long my brain will not stop the wanting another.

On the other hand, little girl and big brother are great. I can't imagine having children closer in age. I know that is what everybody wants, and I am sure there are great parts. But seeing them together and how much in love they are with each other I can't imagine it any other way. She is crawling all over the place and getting into everything. And smiling at everyone.
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#461 of 810 Old 08-03-2014, 11:37 AM
 
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Tear thanks

Rcr thanks. Thats ok I just wanted you to know you and blue and some of the others were so good to me during the horrible time when dh died.

I was sorry to hear about your mum last year. And so sorry to hear about you and dh. I guess give it time the stress snuck up on you over a long time it may take a while to get back. Not that I have any experience! Glad your little ones are doing so well
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#462 of 810 Old 08-04-2014, 06:24 AM
 
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Tracy - awe, thanks :-) I think you do great at supporting! Sometimes I feel like I only jump in at strange times, but I'm glad to whenever I can help someone out :-) We didn't do any of the extra tests... we knew we were going to have our babies regardless, so why not spend that time in bliss and not worrying about the end goal?

SILVER!!! HI girl!! It's SO good to see you, and even better to see you with a BFP!!! YEAH!!! Congrats!!! (sorry, lot's of !! to make a point ha ha)

Milk - OMG I'm so glad to hear this! I can't imagine how anxious you must be... please know that we are here for you - any time, no matter what! I'm hoping hoping hoping for you that everything continues to go smooth and you'll be posting about your birth notice in approximately 28 weeks!!!

rcr - oh honey, I'm sorry to hear about the rought time on the marriage. One thing that our therapist said to us (unfortunately it was at the time that I wasn't listening, but I've never forgotten, and use it when I feel like life is getting in the way) was that sometimes you have to do the things you maybe aren't in the mood to do... I'm not talking DTD, but things like hugging, kissing, holding hands, cuddling, etc. By simply doing them you're reminding yourself and each other that there is/was something there. Big hugs to you, don't let IF rip this away from you too. After DH and I reconciled I realized that walking away was the biggest mistake of my life. Now, almost 5 years after reconciliation we are doing amazing. We've had some bumps in the road (one of them more like mountain sized) but we keep trying and keep fighting for each other and ourselves and I'm so glad we did/do/are. Hang in there!!! Glad the kiddos are doing good!!

AFM - The kids started a new daycare today, that was kinda hard for all of us. I took my time in dropping them off. I'm hoping to get DD into the school systems preschool this month to help with her speech. I mailed in my paperwork today, so hopefully they'll call soon and we can get the 'home study' done sooner versus later. She's also finally interested in wearing big girl underwear, but is still having accidents. I'm good with that - she seems to be trying most days so I'll take it where I can. Her birthday was just a week and a half ago, I can't believe she's 4!!

Our dog died 2 1/2 weeks ago. DH was out of town, of course. And even though the vet said (she had been sick and we knew it was just a matter of time) that we'd most likely have to put her down as house pet's don't tend to die on their own (good diets, no survival of the fittest, etc) she did actually go on her own. Looked like she just laid down, went to sleep, and never woke up. The bad part about that is I came home from a seminar to find her. Luckily I hadn't picked the kids up yet from daycare, but I was a mess. Called my parents and they came over to help me out, including taking her to the local 24 hour animal hospital for cremation.

And I am finally starting back for my MBA this month. I've wanted it for as long as I can remember (seriously, I knew as a kid I'd get it) but after IF got in the way, then some moves, then 2 kids, then DH traveling, well, it just kept getting pushed off. So DH finally said - Just Do It. So, I did. Little nervous, little excited. Life's gonna get even crazier. Glutton and all that. (did I even spell that right? It looks wrong ha ha)

Otherwise - keeping an eye on everyone! Glad to see everyone doing well!!
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#463 of 810 Old 08-04-2014, 08:55 AM
 
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@hope4light
Thanks for posting such a long post. I enjoyed reading it. Congrats on starting up school again! Eeks, one day I will be going back too I imagine. It's gonna be hard works with kiddos but it does seem as we get older, we get smarter so it will probably be a piece of cake for ya.
I'm sorry to hear about your dog( hugs)
Please keep us post( well me anyway )
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#464 of 810 Old 08-04-2014, 10:04 AM
 
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Thanks hope I agree it metirs a lot of !!!!!! Only took me 4.5 years to graduate from the ivf thread!

Sorry to hear about your dog.

Well done with school and I hope thr day care goes well.

AFM: got the forms for midwife to call me and gp prescribed all my meds which is a massive saving

But I'm not sleeping well and worrying a lot
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#465 of 810 Old 08-04-2014, 01:26 PM
 
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@Silverbird
How many weeks are you?

Oh and I just had questions like where do you live and did you go through an agency or use your clinics pool and were the embryos fresh or frozen? Just basic questions
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#466 of 810 Old 08-04-2014, 01:46 PM
 
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Hi tracy,

I'm 5 weeks

I live in Wales.

My frozen embroys were saved from my last round with fresh donor eggs. My clinic picked to donors though obviously I had a say.

Funny looking at midwife forms have any members of your family had .... not really relevant!

What about you?
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#467 of 810 Old 08-04-2014, 02:05 PM
 
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I'm in oregon
I'm 12+weeks.
I had a fresh cycle from a donor pool at my clinic!!

Are you having any morning sickness? I think I'm about to get over mine. First trimester stinks.. Lol
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#468 of 810 Old 08-04-2014, 03:52 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Tracy - Somehow I thought you were on the east coast! Totally wrong. My brother just moved to Oregon this year - Portland/Hillsboro area.
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#469 of 810 Old 08-05-2014, 05:23 AM
 
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So the doc was sure she heard 2 different heart rates at my appointment last night. I'm measuring 20 weeks and I'm 16 weeks. So, that's good.

Now I just wait 2 weeks for the anatomy scan. We'll start to tell everybody after that. If it goes well.
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Mom to AJ 4/07 and Genevieve 5/09

And then: I'm really, really tired of making angels.

But wait, could it really be true?


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#470 of 810 Old 08-05-2014, 06:58 AM
 
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@Xerxella
Seems everything is just great to me. Now we wait for the scan! I'm sure all will be good @monkeyscience
Yep, in oregon on the coast! I am very familiar with Hillsboro! Great location.
Afm
I have an appointment on Thursday so I'm a bit anxious. I keep hearing a heartbeat so that is relieving.

I'm having issues laying on my back or right side at night. Last night I woke from sleeping on my back and I felt awful sick like I might throw up for about 15 minutes. I'm off to research but if any one has any info please share???????

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#471 of 810 Old 08-05-2014, 10:37 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I keep Googling what time it is in Australia, hoping it will get to be time for good news from you, Milk. Still in the wee hours of the morning, though. :P

I wish it were Wednesday, here, too. 32 week appointment is tomorrow, and I want the results of my lab tests and for my doc to tell me if this baby is breech or not!

Tracy - Maybe the baby's laying on your vena cava? I know laying on your left side is recommended to avoid compressing the vena cava (major vein returning blood to the heart). For me, laying on my left side is about the only way to tame my hideous heartburn (which in the early days also caused nausea). So maybe that's it?

X - Glad things are continuing to go well. Will be waiting anxiously for your scan. Still planning on keeping the sex a surprise?

argh, potty accident. More later.

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#472 of 810 Old 08-05-2014, 10:38 AM
 
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Wake up @Milk8shake !!! It's Wednesday morning in Australia! OK. It's like 3 am, but maybe your appointment is early???? What time is your appointment? Update us when you can. We're thinking of you.

Married to one of the last good guys left Jim
Mom to AJ 4/07 and Genevieve 5/09

And then: I'm really, really tired of making angels.

But wait, could it really be true?


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#473 of 810 Old 08-05-2014, 06:02 PM
 
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Sending love and big hugs to milk8 today! I'm rooting for you!

Our little miracles are here!!joy.gif
energy.gif DD Born 7/15/11 biggrinbounce.gif DS Born 4/3/13
love.giflove.gif Keep growing healthy and strong, beautiful little fighter babies!!!

Auntie to Nell, Greta, Maggie, and Elsa!

Remembering our 3 losses
 

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#474 of 810 Old 08-05-2014, 06:34 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Finally on my computer so I can do this... @blueyezz4 - Silver wanted you to see her good news. And I love you!

Monkey (30) + Pirate (28) = a forever family (5/10) - Baby Bird (8/12), our long-awaited first, and one (9/13 @ 7w 6d); PCOS
*4***8***12***16***20***24***28***32***36**40** Oct 2014 - it's a
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#475 of 810 Old 08-05-2014, 10:53 PM
 
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Sorry for the suspense, it was a late appt. Short story is that baby is alive and appears normal. My downs risk is 1:2600. My cervix measuring 2.7cm.

I'm booked in for my cerclage first thing in the morning and I'll be in overnight. I'm nervous about it!
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#476 of 810 Old 08-05-2014, 11:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Yay for continued good news! It's not your fault you live in Upsidedown land, and we're all obsessed stalkers.

Good news about the overnight stay is that you should be able to get lots of reassuring monitoring, right? Hoping and praying for the best.
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#477 of 810 Old 08-06-2014, 01:23 AM
 
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Milk8, a big landmark crossed! May I allow myself a ? Good luck with the cerclage! Thank you for the update. Keep us posted when you can!

Our little miracles are here!!joy.gif
energy.gif DD Born 7/15/11 biggrinbounce.gif DS Born 4/3/13
love.giflove.gif Keep growing healthy and strong, beautiful little fighter babies!!!

Auntie to Nell, Greta, Maggie, and Elsa!

Remembering our 3 losses
 

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#478 of 810 Old 08-06-2014, 06:59 AM
 
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milk - glad to hear everything remains good!!! update us once you get out and let us know how it all went. Fingers crossed for you!!


Me: 34, DH: 36, DD born 7/25/10 After 4 years of trying and failed IVF treatments (missing my angels).  IVF/ICSI worked this time! DS born 1/8/13!



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#479 of 810 Old 08-06-2014, 07:14 AM
 
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@Milk8shake
This is you miracle baby. Congrats mama!! So happy for you!
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#480 of 810 Old 08-06-2014, 08:52 AM
 
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Fertility Challenged Graduates Thread - Spring/Summer 2014

@Milk8shake - I told you. I'm keeping this pregnancy; therefore, you're keeping yours.

I'm glad they're being proactive. I'm so hopeful for you. Sending so much love your way.
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Married to one of the last good guys left Jim
Mom to AJ 4/07 and Genevieve 5/09

And then: I'm really, really tired of making angels.

But wait, could it really be true?


The whole story at: www.xerxella.blogspot.com
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