Overdue, but unsure of due date (overwhelmed) - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 6 Old 09-26-2014, 03:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Overdue, but unsure of due date (overwhelmed)

Hello all,
I am technically overdue, 41 weeks today, and the due date was supposedly the 19th of September. However, I didn't get an ultrasound until (they estimated) 23 weeks into the pregnancy and I am very unsure of my cycle. We based the due date on the ultrasound alone. I have been told that the due date may be up to two weeks off on either side of the estimated date (ultrasound dating is rather inaccurate), so I could be as much as 39 weeks along or as overdue as 43 weeks along! Knowing this they have sent me in for multiple non-stress tests this past week and one biophysical profile/ultrasound. All of the tests baby and I passed with flying colors, BPP scored 8 of 8. Fluid levels great, etc. They have three more tests scheduled for next week and told me that they wont let me go past 42 weeks even though they know about the due date issue. I really don't want to be induced but I am supposedly carrying a larger baby also (estimated 9.5 pounds at last ultrasound). All of the pressure to induce is wearing on me emotionally and I really don't want to be induced due to all the health risks. Still at this point seems almost easier since I have to constantly go in for testing nearly every other day (which is also expensive)! Any advice or thoughts ladies? Have any of you been in this position also? Thanks!
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#2 of 6 Old 09-27-2014, 11:50 AM
 
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Hi Sparrowspearl. I had my daughter at 42 weeks. I'm 4'10" and the doctors tried really hard to scare me with the whole "baby is already too big" bogus line. They told me that according the ultrasounds, my baby was going to be 10-12lb. She was 6lb14oz at birth. Obviously, she needed the extra time in the uterus. I was forced to do the nonstress tests too. I actually liked them a bit because I got to see my baby so much (and they were covered by my insurance). And it also gave me peace of mind, and reassured what I already felt -- that we were both ok. They were very heavy on convincing me to get an induction. I actually broke down and agreed, but cancelled it on the day of the induction. I just couldn't bring myself to force my baby to do something she wasn't yet ready to do, just because the OB was worried about liability (liability goes sky high for them if you go past 41 weeks). I was even threatened with a court ordered induction if I didn't agree. But I trusted my baby would come out when she was ready. Don't be surprised if they use other scare tactics too, like saying the placenta is too old and baby is no longer getting what s/he needs. They tried that with me too, to scare me into an induction. When my daughter was born, the OB told me how healthy my placenta looked.

It was a very difficult time. You want to do what's best for baby, and you believe what your doctors tell you. But you also have to listen to your intuition, and believe in your body's ability to do what it needs to do when it needs to do it. Especially with your due date being +/- 2weeks. Best of luck, Mama. I remember how emotionally draining that was!! It's such an important decision, and we doubt our gut feelings because we have authoritative people in white coats telling us otherwise. I am hoping for the best outcome for both of you, whatever you decide. Hugs!!!
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#3 of 6 Old 09-30-2014, 11:13 AM
 
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I would just like to calm you down with this fun piece of information: Here in Sweden, a country with one of the best healthcare systems in the whole wide world, they base your due date on an ultrasound done between 18 and 20 weeks of gestation, so 23 doesn't sound all that far off. They also allow women to go into the 42nd week of pregnancy without (it actually depends on the hospital in which the woman is registered to give birth) any interference - after that they do tests and in individual cases recommend induction.

It's much easier said than done, but try to relax and talk to your care provider ...

Proud mommy to our stellar Stella (3/2011). Cautiously expecting our in April 2015 after loosing a sweet little angel in April 2014.
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#4 of 6 Old 10-01-2014, 03:09 AM
 
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Fear not!! I have four very healthy, very late bubbas. #1 was born at 42 weeks + 3 days, 7 lbs 15 oz. #2 was born 42 wks + 5 days, 8 lbs 1 oz. #3 was born at 42 wks + 6 days, barely scraping 6 lbs!! And God bless #4 , he was born at 44 wks + 1 day, 8 lbs 5 oz.

They were all healthy slow cookers. Scares the hell out of doctors here in America. Frightens us mamas who've been conditioned to think the worst. But, it is all for naught.

After baby one, I optioned to 'go dark' after week 40. I pretend I don't know doctors exist, except for my own curiosity and concern. Go for the tests when you need to see your baby. When you're too stressed? Don't. That's my two cents in the bucket :-)
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#5 of 6 Old 10-01-2014, 12:22 PM
 
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You don't "have" to do anything.

The phrase that they won't "let you" go past 42 weeks is interesting... what exactly will they do? I was told this at one of my appointments, and I asked the midwife directly "what will they do if I go past 42 weeks" and she told me it was against New York State law. So again, I asked what they will do, and the answer is actually... nothing. They can't MAKE you do anything without a court order. They can arm twist and guilt and tell you all sorts of horror stories and brow beat you... but if you cancel your appointments and don't come in, they won't come to your house and drag you out. And if they do try the court order crap, then go by the low end of the estimate. They can't just make up numbers and then force medical procedures on you, and if they really try, I'd call one of those 1-800 lawyers and keep them on speed dial.

The vast majority of babies will let you know VERY clearly when they are ready to arrive. Trust your body and trust your baby. If everything has been good and healthy so far, then why would you suddenly not trust the process?

If 39 is the low end of the dates, then go with that. How do you feel?

Quote:
I optioned to 'go dark' after week 40. I pretend I don't know doctors exist, except for my own curiosity and concern. Go for the tests when you need to see your baby. When you're too stressed? Don't.

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#6 of 6 Old 10-01-2014, 12:22 PM
 
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double post

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Last edited by PitBullMom; 10-01-2014 at 12:23 PM.
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