I have a delimma and am wondering what others have done, or plan to do.
When #2 comes along, Evelyn will be just shy of 2 years old....we don't really plan on her bringing her with us to the hospital...I think she's too young. So that being said....we don't know what to do with her...lol..
When we had dd, we asked all the family to give us a couple weeks to get use to each other and the changes (and the dogs get use to things too) before anyone came up....mostly because I didn't know what to expect from anything, my feelings, what they would do, say, expect. And also because they had to stay with us when here....we're 45 minutes to any town
So this time we thought we would have mil come up and stay with us, mostly for Evelyn to have someone she knows and trusts while we're off having #2, and then she could bring her to see us asap afterwards.
For the most part I am fine with this idea....I know that mil understands where I am coming from with my "ap" ideas and even if she doesn't agree with them, she'd never say anything, only try to help however she could. Mil is great!!
The problem is I don't want to hurt my mom's feelings....but she doesn't have a car right now, and has not been exactly reliable in the past....she's been having a rough go as of late, her and my dad got divorced after 24 years (a thing us kids have wanted to happen for years!!!), but she had a breakdown and was hospitalized a couple times, they haven't diagnoised her with anything....they thought bi-polar, but have since changed it to a major breakdown....lots of shit.
So anyways, i don't know what to do....I am always straightforward with my mom, and feel I can tell her anything....I told her that we were probably going to have mil come up, since she didn't have a car (ok, so I'm not 100% straightforward
: )....and she emailed me back saying that she'd love to come up when we have the baby and help out with Evy, that she could "probably" get someone to drive her up (500km away) and pick her up....
I don't know what to do....I've been trying to get her to come and visit since Aug of last year, and she can never get here.
I really need to know that someone will be here with Evy....kwim?
I love my mom, and trust her with Evy, I just don't trust her to come when she says she will.
We also thought about telling everyone to wait and getting my good friend up here, who Evy loves and trusts to watch Evy while we go have #2 and then bring her up to us. And going with the we need a couple weeks thing again, but I just don't know if I will need help or not. Dh will be home for 10 days, maybe longer if we can save some money....
Any advice?? What did others do??