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#61 of 97 Old 03-05-2003, 03:03 PM
 
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Originally posted by laurag
I read somewhere recently that most pregnant models in magazine ads aren't even pregnant. They usually use belly pillows to make them look like they are pregnant. The designer they quoted said that it is because "pregnant women's skin doesn't photograph well and their bodies are soft and unattractive!" Can you believe that??
I knew it! Damn them!
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#62 of 97 Old 03-05-2003, 03:05 PM
 
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Laura, are you kidding me? Wow, that's so offensive. What a great way to make us all feel horrible! Sheesh. I'd much rather see real live soft pregnant women! I know pregnant women come in all sizes, just like non-preg women do, and I'd kind of like to see it all.

In other magazine news, I picked up the latest Mothering at Wild Oats this morning, and the cashier told me that someone had complained because of the "offensive" cover.
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#63 of 97 Old 03-05-2003, 03:11 PM
 
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I wonder what she was offended by? The beautiful photo of a woman nursing her baby? Or maybe the fact that the woman doesn't look exactly like her? Oops - did I say that out loud? Sometimes tact is not my finest quality.
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#64 of 97 Old 03-05-2003, 03:14 PM
 
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I actually got the impression it was a man who complained, and also that it was someone who worked there. You'd think someone who worked at Wild Oats would have a slightly different view, but maybe not. The cashier said, "I don't know why they came to me to complain, since I'm still nursing my two-and-a-half year old." The thing is, you can barely even tell the kid is nursing on the cover! Ah well, not everyone can be as perfect as we all are.
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#65 of 97 Old 03-05-2003, 03:20 PM
 
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True, true. As dh always says "If I had the big stick..."

On a different note, I am wondering from all of you second (or third, or fourth, or...) time mamas, did you feel more connected to your baby the first time around? I feel like when I was pregnant with dd I was so into being pregnant. The whole world looked different to me and I felt so special. This time, there are lots of days when I don't even think about being pregnant. Of course, having an 18 month old is quite a distraction, but I miss that special feeling of closeness with my growing baby.

If others have felt this too, what did you do to help you focus on the baby growing inside while also focusing on the baby that is already outside?
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#66 of 97 Old 03-05-2003, 03:29 PM
 
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I feel like when I was pregnant with dd I was so into being pregnant.
I've been feeling the same way, although it's been getting better. The hormones really hit me the first couple months and I really did not feel any excitement about being pregnant. So weird, cuz I was so excited to get pg.! Like I said, I am feeling better now and definately excited and finally started thinking about names. Also, the first time around I did a ton of reading on pregnancy and birth, I just don't see that happenening this time - no time for it! I've hardly opened my pg. books, but I devoured them the 1st pg.
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#67 of 97 Old 03-05-2003, 05:00 PM
 
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I'd love to hear all of your ways of focusing on the baby inside too. While this is my first, it was kind of a surprise, and I think the fact that I wasn't expecting to get pregnant made it all seem really strange for a while. I'm really excited about being pregnant, but a lot of the time I don't even feel pregnant. I've been focusing on thinking good baby thoughts and sending happy messages to my baby, and sometimes that feels right, and sometimes it feels like I'm an insane woman carrying on conversations with imaginary friends.
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#68 of 97 Old 03-05-2003, 06:03 PM
 
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I'm having a hard time focusing on the baby right now. When I was sick, I felt really connected (I had a constant reminder I was pregnant!). Now I'm feeling mostly normal (just rounder) and not really feeling the baby move yet. DH says he sometimes forgets that I'm pregnant until he sees my tummy! I sometimes start to have doubts and think I'm just gaining weight. I KNOW I'm pregnant, but this is a really strange time. I'm so ready for a good hard kick...or atleast a nice gentle flutter to say hi! I really think that once I feel it, I'll start bonding more. I do rub my tummy and talk to it, but I'm ready for a response! Julie, I hear you, it's almost like having an imaginary friend!
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#69 of 97 Old 03-05-2003, 06:49 PM
 
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Sharon, that's exactly how I feel. I was convinced for so long that this was some kind of hysterical pregnancy! It wasn't until my second midwife appointment, when the midwife was doing an internal exam to try to determine how far along I am, and it was inconclusive, and my husband and I were just sort of staring at her, and finally she said, "But it's definitely a pregnant uterus!" and we both sort of sighed, "Ohhhhh!" I think we were both waiting for her to say, "I don't actually think you're pregnant at all."

Anyway, I do try to think about my baby a lot, and have been at home all this week (I do contract work, and my last contract just ran out), and am suddenly feeling strange about the fact that I'm never really alone. I'm knitting a sweater for the baby, eating lunch for the baby, doing yoga for the baby. I'd love to just lie on my back and eat goat cheese for ME!
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#70 of 97 Old 03-06-2003, 01:53 AM
 
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all I can say for me is it seems to be going by faster.
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#71 of 97 Old 03-06-2003, 01:54 AM
 
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are we really five months pregnant. I am nearly 17 weeks so am I five months?
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#72 of 97 Old 03-06-2003, 03:10 AM
 
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I was just thinking the same thing today....I think we're ending up month 4 and starting month 5. Doesn't seem possible!
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#73 of 97 Old 03-06-2003, 11:59 AM
 
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I can hardly believe we're in our fifth month, too!
Yay us!

I've been doing reiki with our baby every morning before I get out of bed. In early December, I got certified for Reiki Level 1, and my instructor, who was fabulous, said that I should start doing reiki with the baby right away, so I started right then, and haven't stopped! It's really nice.

Plus, my eating inability seems to have disappeared! Now I'm eating everything in sight. Maybe it was a little left over morning sickness.

Has anyone started shopping for maternity clothes? I haven't yet, but I think I'll need to soon! I bought a few pants that were a couple sizes larger than my normal size, and well, they're getting a bit tight! Any suggestions? I was thinking Target, they're affordable, and the commercial that I saw seemed to have some cute clothes.

Two people have actually commented on my belly! Wahoo! Now I'm starting to feel pregnant and not just a little more chubby.
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#74 of 97 Old 03-06-2003, 12:11 PM
 
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Wait, fifth month? Is that right? I was thinking that, at 17 weeks, I'm more like four and a half months. But I'm still slightly confused by the whole "timing from LMP" thing, so I could be wrong. It's much more fun to say five months pregnant than four and a half!

Um, Annais, not only have I started to buy maternity clothes, but that's all I'm wearing. Now I DO feel huge! Some of the maternity shirts I have are still a little big (i.e., just look voluminous) but I can only really wear maternity pants right now. I think I lost the ability to wear regular pants and breathe at the same time at around 12 weeks. I wore bigger pants for a while, but now it's easier -- and more comfortable -- to wear maternity pants.

Besides the clothes I've borrowed, I've gotten everything from Target. They do have really cute things, and they're not too expensive at all. I got a pair of dark boot-cut jeans, black pants, a black cardigan, and a cute vertically-striped button-down shirt. I don't think any of those things was over $20. I've also gotten some things at Old Navy -- they have a sale online, and I got a sweater, some t-shirts, a bathing suit, workout shorts, and a v-neck blousy thing.
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#75 of 97 Old 03-06-2003, 12:58 PM
 
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Gosh, I'm way out of it - I was thinking I was JUST 4 months! Dh always says there's 4.5 weeks in a month, so that gets me confused. Even so...wouldn't we be 5 months when we are 20 weeks? If you are 17 weeks KJ, then you are starting the 5th month of pregnancy, but not yet completed the 5 months. Maybe I'm still confused.

I was sick with the flu this week and couldn't eat anything for a whole day. My belly completely deflated! Now it feels huge again.

If you want mat. clothes for cheap - try consignment or second hand shops too. Old Navy just started carrying their mat. at some stores, you can check which ones their website.
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#76 of 97 Old 03-06-2003, 01:59 PM
 
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JuliF, I just wanted to pop in and say that I am feeling a lot like you with regards to the whole connecting with the babe issue. This is also my first and a SUPRISE. I'm very excited but most days I'm feeling flabby and loose and not so much like I'm housing a life! I also am trying to remember to send positive thoughts to the little one. On another note, I am going to go looking for mat. clothes today! I don't so much look preggers as nothing fits! I'm going to see about Target and Old Navy. Are any of you ladies bigger sized? What I mean is I'm normally a 16 and I'm thinking Target and Old Navy might not have my size? Since I don't regularly shop at either store? I dunno. If I find some fun stuff I'll let you know.

Everyone have a Great Day!!!!!!!

Nikki
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#77 of 97 Old 03-06-2003, 02:21 PM
 
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I guess when I said 5th month, I figured we were all in the process of completing our fifth month! Even though, I guess, we've only just completed ou fourth month, most of us. It is really confusing!

Julie, 'cause I'm nosy, I checked out your homepage and it's great!
Plus I like it because a) I love to knit and b)I started my own book group, too! It's very cute.
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#78 of 97 Old 03-06-2003, 05:07 PM
 
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Hi, August mamas! I don't have much time to write, but wanted to say that I've found a pregnancy relaxation tape really helpful for this challenge of connecting with your little one when you've already got other kiddlywinks running around and life seems just way too busy in general.

I don't listen to the tape daily like I wish I could (and like I hope to soon), but whenever I can, it's great -- it's the one time I can focus on me, on the baby, and on relaxing, and what she says is just really nurturing and encouraging.

Just a suggestion, I'd love to hear others, too!

darcy
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#79 of 97 Old 03-06-2003, 05:35 PM
 
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Nikki, when I was in Target and Old Navy the other day, they had a lot of different sizes. Though they're not numbered sizes, just S-XL. But the XLs looked fairly generous, as did many of the Larges, so it may be worth going and trying some stuff on. Who knows with clothing manufacturers these days anyway. My mom sent me a maternity twinset in size medium, and it's absolutely enormous (and it's not like I'm tiny, believe me!).

Hey Annais, I wouldn't have put my homepage in my signature if I wasn't conceited enough to think people would visit! Glad you liked it.

And Darcy, maybe I'll see if I can find a pregnancy relaxation tape. I did a different prenatal yoga tape today ("The Method") which was a lot more about connecting with your baby, and I thought that helped.

I guess the problem I have sometimes with the whole connecting thing is that, while I'm really honestly excited about this, I'm also a mixture of scared and astonished. And people (well, mostly my mom) will be gushing and thrilled and beside themselves, and I might not respond as enthusiastically, and then suddenly I feel bad, which is wrong. But this is probably one of many lessons about trusting myself and not letting my mom (or anyone) tell me what to do about my baby!
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#80 of 97 Old 03-07-2003, 01:06 PM
 
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Hey, did I tell you guys that my ob/gyn office had to release their midwife?
I'm so sad!!
For my first pregnancy, I went to the midwives at our local birth center and adored them. Sigh. But because I had uterine abnormailities and a subsequent surgery, they could no longer see me. So I was sooooo excited that my old ob/gyn office had a midwife on staff!!! Yipee! I had my first appt with her, and she was fabulous.
So, I went to my 15 week appt, and the doctor told me they had to let her go, because none of their patients would take appts with her or let her deliver their babies. Isn't that horrible?!?! Sometimes I hate where I live, too many people with too much money and no imagination. Fortunately, the doctor seemed to be upset about it. Now the midwife works in the city, where, as the doctor said "people are more accepting of what she does."

Well, I do like my doctors so far.
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#81 of 97 Old 03-07-2003, 02:15 PM
 
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I agree, I think we're just finishing up 4 months and getting started on 5, so I would say that I'm 4 months along (or 4.5) or just leave it at 17 weeks and let people figure it out for themselves! It's all so confusing!

As for maternity clothes, I've been lucky enough to borrow lots, I got a GAP gift certificate for Christmas and shopped their sale section on line and got some good deals. Otherwise, I've bought one sweater and that's about it! I'm not wearing maternity pants yet, but my regular ones need rubber bands on the buttons to give me more space. I usually have them all undone when I'm sitting....I started wearing maternity shirts about 2 weeks ago because it covers up my unbottoned pants better!! I finally had someone tell me yesterday that I'm looking bigger!
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#82 of 97 Old 03-07-2003, 06:05 PM
 
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Sharon - great idea with the rubber bands on the buttons - I never though of that. I usually just leave it undone with the top sticking out!!

Darcy - like your tape idea too.

I also have a prenatal yoga tape, but haven't done it yet. I am in a yoga class (not prenatal), which is a good time to connect with your body. I took I prenatal class during my first pregnancy and it was great. If you can find one I really recommend it. The prenatal classes are nice because you think about the baby more.

Annais - bummer about the midwife. I got denied midwife care and switched to the dr.s last pg. b/c I'm high risk. I hated them so I switched to a diff. midwife group that took some h.r. patients when I was 7 months!

I've been feeling movements for a couple days!!
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#83 of 97 Old 03-08-2003, 02:51 AM
 
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Hi everyone!

It's so nice to come here and read all your stories of what your going through. It makes me feel normal because I'm going through the same things.

The issue about feeling connected to your baby is a good one. This is my second and I forget I'm pregnant often because I'm so focused on my daughter in front of me. I do think about the baby inside me alot but it's hard to know how to think about it. I try to do belly massage and deep breathing, that seems to help. But I think for me having a baby only becomes a reality once I actually have the baby. The first thing I said when y daughter was born was "o my god, it's a baby"! Is that silly or what.
I'd like to feel more connected this time too. I think just taking time to feel your baby and focus on your baby helps.

Maternity clothes! I have to say that elastic waistbands are great! Thats all I'm wearing now. they grow with you, and you can wear them below your belly when you need to. And you can also wear them postpartum.

Blessings to all you pregnant women and babies to be!
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#84 of 97 Old 03-08-2003, 03:13 AM
 
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I have to make a confession... I love girl scout cookies! I bought two boxes about a week ago and then dh came home that night with two more boxes! So sweet of him because he knows I love them (and he doesn't like them much at all), but I've been trying SOOO hard to control my sweet tooth and I've done a pretty good job since I found out I was pregnant. But these cookies are just killing me. I can't believe I'm not feeling the baby...it must be on a huge sugar high! I've made dh promise not to buy any more sweets (esp. gs cookies) for a long time. I keep trying to convince myself that when they are gone, they're gone. So if I eat them quickly, that's better for me than spreading them out over a long time! eek! What kind of logic is that?! Anyone else giving in to guilty pleasures?! I think it's even easier to do right now because I feel good and I haven't really felt the baby yet so I don't have that constant reminder. And I can pretend that my growing belly is just a result of too many cookies! (of those original 4 boxes, there are only 2 left!!!) At least I'm drinking a glass of milk with them! :
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#85 of 97 Old 03-10-2003, 02:09 PM
 
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Sharon, my husband bought girl scout cookies, called me to tell me he bought them, and then...left them at work. How cruel is that? We've got plenty of other sweet things here to tide me over, though.

I think I've been feeling movement for a week or so now, but I'm not sure. Some days I think I feel it a lot, and then there will be a day when I don't feel anything. But from what I read, I'm pretty sure that it is the baby moving that I'm feeling.
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#86 of 97 Old 03-10-2003, 02:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I would rather say I am just 4 months cuz I hate to say 5 and think I only have 4 to go when I probably have 5 1/2 months left. It makes it asier in the end. I am *due* on the 17th but probably won't deliver til the 25th to 29th.
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#87 of 97 Old 03-12-2003, 12:09 PM
 
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time is a passing, maybe we are five months now. at least i may be. I am at the beginning of august.
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#88 of 97 Old 03-12-2003, 12:11 PM
 
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please check out this thread and if you have any interest, let patricia know

http://216.92.20.151/discussions/sho...threadid=44400
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#89 of 97 Old 03-12-2003, 06:00 PM
 
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August mamas,

do you stick to eating healthy daily?
Some days, even if I have a healthy lunch that I just need to heat up, I DON"T WANT TO DO IT! Instead, I wanna have chips, chocolate, .... you know, the ~b-a-d~ stuff, yikes!!!
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#90 of 97 Old 03-13-2003, 01:37 AM
 
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just checking in to say that i'm HUGE!!!

i see the midwife friday (3/14) and i know i'm measuring really big still. I'm really concerned that this may be a fibroid growing with baby and it might affect my ability to vbac. Either that or i have a huge baby. Or there are two in there.

but ppl cannot believe i'm only 18weeks and a few days. I look at least 6months/24 weeks.

check out the pic in my sig line - i was 17wks 3 days in that one. i'm even bigger a week later. Is it cuz i had the 2 cesarean births? is it a fibroid? huge baby? twins?

will schedule my one and only u/s at my appt friday and then hopefully we'll find out whats going on.

feeling movement now. yay, i love that. still can't hear hb with the fetoscope but ppl are telling me and midwife confirms not till 20wks. Eating so much. Not excercising at all . (well, i have a 30month old and watch another 28mos and a 13mo old so i do get around a bit. lol). Trying to at least do kegels and listen to my hypnobirthing tapes.

re-reading Birthing from Within again.

ok. thats my rambling update. will post after my appt friday
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