Feelings/Thoughts after a VBAC - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
Old 06-14-2006, 04:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
CarrieK's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 159
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Hi there,

I'll cross-post this under VBAC too.

I'm pg with #2 and really focused on having a VBAC this time around, especially since I thought the need for my c-section with DS1 was so unnecessary due to a variety of interventions, fear, not knowing better, etc...

Now I've done my homework, will deliver with a midwife, have a doula, limit and/or avoid all interventions, and feel really confident in my birthing ability. But I'm wondering, if I do achieve a successful VBAC, will that somehow take away some of my bitter feelings and resentment towards my first birth? Of course, I'm so eternally grateful for my healthy beautiful DS, and in the end, that's all that matters. But my birth experience was so scary and the doctor was so disrespectful, I somehow can't get it out of my mind.

Did anyone feel like after they had the VBAC, they were able to let go of those negative c-section thoughts and feelings? Or do I need to get over it now before the next birth? Please advise!
CarrieK is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Old 06-14-2006, 06:25 PM
 
mary3mama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Middle Indiana
Posts: 2,256
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Well, in my case, in between my c/s and my VBAC I had a loss at 21 weeks. So as I went into that 3rd pregnancy I had lots of bad feelings towards my body, which I felt had let me down both with #1 and #2.

The VBAC, medicalized though it was, helped to restore my own faith in my body and it's natural ability to grow and birth a healthy baby. Along the way, though, I do realize now that the process of being committed to and fighting all along for that VBAC did heal alot of my negative feelings about DS#1's birth.

Personally I don't think you need to worry about 'getting over' your feelings about your c/s before this next birth. Instead, I'd focus my energy on being the most ready, most healthy and most informed mama I could be when that labor starts.

I believe the emotional healing will come, with time and a better experience.

I think that's one of the reasons we've chosen to work with midwives and plan a homebirth this time...it's just one more step down this road of healing more and empowering.

Maryhippie.gif

mary3mama is offline  
Old 06-15-2006, 02:33 PM
 
lexbeach's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Northampton, MA
Posts: 5,040
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I'm planning a Vbac too (actually a HBAC), and my midwives say that it is CRITICAL to work through all of your feelings about the c-birth before your vbac. They say that it will all come up when you're in labor in you haven't already processed it. They actually think this is the most important way to prepare for a vbac.

I do think that having a successful vaginal birth will be a very healing experience, but that it is also important to go into it without any negative feelings towards your body (that may be left over from the last time). For me, there is not so much stuff to work through since I had a scheduled c-section last time for breech twins, so I don't feel like my body "failed me," the way many women feel when they've attempted a vaginal birth and ended up with a c-section. But I do have to work through the same issues which I believe led to my twins being breech. . . mainly fear of what could go wrong during a vaginal birth, and doubting whether or not my body could do it.

HTH! And good luck!

Lex

Mindfully mothering SIX kids (ages 5, 6, 8, 9, 11 & 11) in a small house with a lot of love.
lexbeach is offline  
 
User Tag List

Thread Tools


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off