heres my post on what happened today ..http://mothering.com/discussions/sho...threadid=63529
update on the ambush appt - talked to my mw today
she was pretty pissed off at how he talked to me and the fact that he basically insinuated she wasn't doing her job.
she said that if i'd seen her she may still have recommended we do the 3 hour just for everyones peace of mind but that its about how he spoke to me. That if looking at all the information and me as a whole person she was still concerned she might have requested i do the test just for our own reassurance as a "team" that all was well.
i suggested that he was throwing his weight around for the student ,not because of me but to show the student how superior the ob is to the midwife and i just got caught in the middle. she agreed and told me she would be speaking with him about the way I was approached, bullied and intimidated and about how he basically undermined her relationship with her patient. that we had a plan and were working together. She said that the reason I was sposed to meet with him was in the event of a surgical birth I'd know him, he was not sposed to even discuss my file with me, the gd tests or anything.
i told her that if necessary i'll meet one of the other ob's cuz i want it documented that i don't want HIM cutting me in the event of surgical birth.
all around, she was really supportive. kept apologizing to me that it happened at all. that he was just sposed to get to know me in the event of surgical birth. not confront me on my choices
we talked a bit about my issues revolving around my mothers diabetes and death (with her anniversary coming up une 9th) and about my weight issues and how measuring my food drives me batty as it brings up all my old self-image/body image stuff. I talked about how upset and stressed i was yesterday because i felt all the strength and power i'd been accumulating over the months , all the fear release work, all the body image work was just trashed. All my power about my knowledge of my body was being questioned again. kwim?
she calmed me down and reminded me that even if the test comes back bad they wont' start insulin right away, they'll just have me continue the diet that i'm already doing . That we'll spend some time at my next appointment doing some more fear release and rebuilding my confidence because i WILL vbac this baby with GD or not.
as long as I've scheduled the test she thinks I should just go for it so we can all feel better next week when it comes back perfectly normal.
anyway. wow i'm longwinded. thanks for the support ladies.