When should I tell the kids - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 16 Old 05-31-2007, 11:17 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi,

I have a question for you but first a little background to the question.

I was sitting on the couch last night with my kids watching tv when our Boston Terrier puppy ran across my boobs. It hurt so bad that I said Owwwwwww. My son (14) looked at me and said "are you pregnant?" my daughter (almost 12) said yeah mom I was wondering the same thing! WHAT!! They never evem knew that we were TTC, and have never said anything like this before!

My question. When is it a good time to tell the kids? I have a super good relationship with them and I think that if I wait to long to tell them that they would be dissapointed and think that I didn't trust them.

What would you do? Please keep in mind that my kids are older.

TIA
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#2 of 16 Old 05-31-2007, 11:25 AM
 
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I have no answer for you, but CONGRATULATIONS!! I was just looking at your chart the other day and thought that it looked really good; I'm so glad that I was right.
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#3 of 16 Old 05-31-2007, 11:28 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks Sabo! Wow you are already 27 weeks???? How are you feeling? nice to see you again!
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#4 of 16 Old 05-31-2007, 11:39 AM
 
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I say tell them, they are old enough to really understand and get excited with you, and I agree if you wait too long they may wonder why you didn't tell them earlier. They will be great helpers I am sure, and will be very happy for you!
Of course, I dont know your kids, but that is what I would do.
Congrats,
Sarah
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#5 of 16 Old 05-31-2007, 12:01 PM
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why not tell them?? If you miscarried you would tell them that, so why not tell them you're pregnant first?

Even if you're not telling the rest of the world yet, they might feel honored that you entrusted them with the secret (as long as you think they would keep the secret).

We told dd before anyone else (she's only 3) and she got to tell everyone else. She's so excited to do that - it really draws her into it.

g.

Canadian mama to A (C/S May 2004) and R (induced VBAC Dec 2007) expecting #3 in July.  Currently obsessing over permaculture, photography and beekeeping.

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#6 of 16 Old 05-31-2007, 04:12 PM
 
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Sharun - First of all,
: CONGRATS!!!! :
Woohoo on your pregnancy!!!
Yay! So happy for you.

I think your kiddos are old enough to know right away, so go ahead and share your good news
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#7 of 16 Old 05-31-2007, 04:39 PM
 
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Congrats on your pregnancy!

I have an 11 yo and I had to tell him right after we found out because I kept getting sick and couldn't hide it. As he has seen me go through the last two pregnancies (3 yo dd, 15 mo ds), he had already figured it out! I just told him that we were trying to keep it pretty quiet due to risk of miscarriage.

Good luck and a lots of wishes for a happy healthy pregnancy!
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#8 of 16 Old 05-31-2007, 06:21 PM
 
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Hey Sharun!!!! Yep, I agree with the others, I'd go ahead and tell them if you want to. I'm sure they would love to share in the excitement!!!

Again and again~~~~ CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I love that beautiful counter in your siggie!!





natural birthin', baby catchin', cloth addicted, intactalactavist mama of 12/00, 6/03, 10/07, 8/10 & our angelcubs three
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#9 of 16 Old 05-31-2007, 08:55 PM
 
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Congrats, Sharun!!!!!

My 5 year old knew from day one ... she went with me to get my beta and she has to know everything in full scientific detail, so I told her.

14 and 12 are certainly old enough to be in the know, even if it's early. What a cool thing to be able to let them share in, don't you think?

Congrats again!!
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#10 of 16 Old 06-01-2007, 02:26 AM
 
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I'd tell them.

Helen mum to five and mistress of mess and mayhem, making merry and mischief til the sun goes down.
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#11 of 16 Old 06-01-2007, 02:54 AM
 
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now; you should tell them now. they are grown up so they will understand.
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#12 of 16 Old 06-01-2007, 04:35 AM - Thread Starter
 
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dctexan Nice to see you again!


mamabearsoblessed you were always such an inspiration to me on the one thread!

To everyone else, thanks for the input!!

I talked to DH about it last night. I am going to the Dr. today for the first checkup. Dh wants to wait to see what the Dr. says. (he still just can't believe it ) He wants to tell the kids on Sunday morning at breakfast. He works a lot and the kids are often hanging out with friends, he wants to tell them together as a family. (He is not their father)

My son will be disgusted (his mom is not suppose to be gio!!!)

My daughter??? Hard to say, she is the princess in the fam and will probably act happy but will think to herself ( I hope it isn't a girl! And, I wish that he were MY real dad)

All in all I think that they will be ok with the fact. I know that they will help out more. I probably won't have to do anything anymore.

Thanks again for you input!! I will let you know how things go. Although I am pretty sure that they won't really be suprised!
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#13 of 16 Old 06-01-2007, 10:25 AM
 
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Aww Sharun :. I am so incredibly happy for you and your family . I know how you have wanted this and it's truly happening!!

Many .
I pray your doc visit is a good one. WOW!! This is really happening!!!!

natural birthin', baby catchin', cloth addicted, intactalactavist mama of 12/00, 6/03, 10/07, 8/10 & our angelcubs three
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#14 of 16 Old 06-01-2007, 11:06 AM - Thread Starter
 
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The visit went good at the doc, he confirmed the pregnancy and we even saw the bean ( well a gestational sac anyway!) We couldn't do any bloodwork because the lab people had already come : Oh well, he wants to see us again in 10 days .

I showed the us pic to dh and pointed out that it had my name on it. He is a believer now. Now I just have to try and keep him quiet for a couple more weeks. He wants to tell the world
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#15 of 16 Old 06-01-2007, 11:15 AM
 
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[SIZE="4"]YAHOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!![/SIZE]

Grow Bean Grow!!!!!

natural birthin', baby catchin', cloth addicted, intactalactavist mama of 12/00, 6/03, 10/07, 8/10 & our angelcubs three
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#16 of 16 Old 06-01-2007, 12:01 PM
 
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I don't know if this might help with telling your kids, but as I read your post about what your kids' reaction might be I couldn't help thinking how beautiful your situation is.

This baby will be a treasure to you all because it will link you all together. Your two older kids are a part of you, and they want to be a part of your dh too, and now this baby is part of them and part of him, and they can look at the baby as a deeper connection to their father.
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