Pregnant after vasectomy! - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 32 Old 06-04-2007, 02:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I just found out 3 days ago that I am 6 weeks pregnant with baby #2. My DS is almost 3 and my DH had a vasectomy almost a year ago to the day.

We were totally blindsided by this, as (obviously) we weren't planning any more children! I am happy about it now, but I was upset when I saw the pregnancy test. I go back and forth between being happy about it, and panicking and wondering how the HELL I'm going to do it! It's such a huge range of emotions I'm having, it's overwhelming. I'm still trying to wrap my brain around the fact that I'm going to have TWO kids now!

I can't shake the feeling that I've done something wrong--it's not like I'm 16 or something. My DH and I are in a stable, long marriage. It's just that my DS was conceived with all intention, and this one was a total surprise.

I should say that I am so grateful to have a wonderful support group of moms in my life, who are really uplifting me and making me feel better about the whole thing.

Anyone else been though this? By the way, the odds on post vasectomy pregnancy are 1 in 5,000.
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#2 of 32 Old 06-04-2007, 03:12 PM
 
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WOW!! congrats, and hugs. What a crazy journey!

CPST
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#3 of 32 Old 06-04-2007, 04:14 PM
 
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My sil is a 'vasectomy baby'--born 13 years after her dad had the procedure... can you even IMAGINE the shock her parents were in?!

I can't fathom what you're going through, but I hope and pray for peace and understanding from your partner for the rest of this pregnancy. Best wishes to you all!!!

Alayna

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mama to Braden (9), Caleb (3) & Julie (16 mo)
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#4 of 32 Old 06-04-2007, 04:21 PM
 
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That must be really stressful... Since we are planning on a vasectomy when we're done making babies, did your husband have the follow up sperm counts done? I have some friends that have opted not to do those.
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#5 of 32 Old 06-04-2007, 04:33 PM
 
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I am 10000% with you!

We found ourselves in a similar position about a year ago. I found out when I was 3 months along. Odds in our situation were 1 in 7000!

I think I cried every day for the first 2-3 weeks. It was SO unexpected and to find out that far into things!

If you need to talk with someone who has BTDT, let me know!

Congrats on your Surprise, even if you are still in shock!
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#6 of 32 Old 06-04-2007, 06:54 PM
 
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Congrats!! Dh just had a vas a week ago and told me if I ever get PG he's demanding a DNA test. Kidding of course.

I think I might fall over if that happens, of course it's always a possibility.

Michelle -mom to Katlyn 4/00 , Jake 3/02, and Seth 5/04
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#7 of 32 Old 06-05-2007, 02:15 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dreamer View Post
My sil is a 'vasectomy baby'--born 13 years after her dad had the procedure... can you even IMAGINE the shock her parents were in?!
13 years?!! OMG.

My DH is very happy and understanding about this. He's upset the most about having to have another vasectomy!

SCSIGRL-- glad to hear that I'm not the only one who had a difficult time with it. I'm feeling better about it every day. At this point I would actually be sad if we lost the baby. I've just had to surrender and know that the universe clearly has another plan for me!

This time we plan on doing some things differently, so hopefully we won't have the same problems we had with DS. Of course, everyone tells me that it WILL be different the second time. It will, right? RIGHT?!

Thanks for all the love and support, ladies.
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#8 of 32 Old 06-05-2007, 03:37 PM
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Not the vasectomy part but the totally unexpected pregnancy with a 3 year old part. Give yourself a little time. You will get used to it.
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#9 of 32 Old 06-05-2007, 03:56 PM
 
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I don't have personal experience with this though I am still freaking out because we've decided DH will get a vasectomy and I am already worried we'll end up with a surprise!

I've been told he needs to be checked at least every year.

I HAVE been told about a lot of post vasectomy babies! Some are 1 year, 5 years, 8 years, and now even 13 years after a vasectomy and one PP said in this thread! Scary!

I am SO glad your hubby is supportive and understanding and not freaking out. Good luck with everything and once it all sinks in and baby is born, you won't know how you ever lived without #2.

Almost a b-ball team: : Taylor -14, Alex -11, Jack -8, Lachlan born at home 11/15/07
"Well behaved women rarely make history"
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#10 of 32 Old 06-05-2007, 04:04 PM
 
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My SIL had a vasectomy baby about 1 year after her husband "got snipped". They had 2 girls and the third was a boy so it was obviously meant to be. Vasectomies aren't fool-proof and it is the human bodies nature to try and fix itself.

I know it must be hard because of the complete surprise factor but just think, this kid really wanted to be born and specifically to you and your DH.

Also, when my BIL went back for snip number 2 the doctor did the sperm check and said it was literally a miracle that SIL got pregnant. It makes me wonder where to docs get their stats for this procedure, seems like everyone knows at least one or 2 people this has happened to.

Good luck.
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#11 of 32 Old 06-05-2007, 05:07 PM
 
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I was a vasectomy baby. My parents hadn't planned on having ANY children at all, but well, here I am!
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#12 of 32 Old 06-05-2007, 05:17 PM
 
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Sometimes there are Bigger Plans that we don't know or comprehend.
I understand how you're feeling. My husband hasn't had a vasectomy, but I can say that when i got pregnant with my 3rd baby, I was surprised and not real excited about it.

I can tell you though that two children isn't as hard at it may seem. They end up playing together, which will give you more free time! Do youhave any siblings? I didn't and always ALWAYS wished I did. So look at the bright side of it (through all the shock!) that they will be buddies forever. And if it's a girl, then you get to see what a girl would look like!

Like I mentioned earlier... sometimes God has bigger plans for us than we know. My third baby actually kept our little family together. While I was pg, I found out my husband was cheating on me and pretty serious about leaving me altogether. But when my daughter was born, he felt obligated, I guess. Now we''ve worked om things and we're doing better than ever!
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#13 of 32 Old 06-05-2007, 10:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Good luck with everything and once it all sinks in and baby is born, you won't know how you ever lived without #2.
What a beautiful sentiment. Thank you so much. I'm sure you're right. I'm already feeling attached to this baby.

Yes, Gibson's mom, just about everyone I have told has told me about how they know of someone else this has happened to. Here's the funny part: my DH was at a bachelor party about 5 months ago. DH mentioned he would not be having any more children because he'd had a vasectomy. Another man there said, "Don't be too sure. My brother had TWO after his vasectomy." And then the man stares right into DH's eyes and says in a very low and quiet voice, "Nature will find a way."

OMG, Jessieann! What an amazing story! Can you elaborate? I'd love to hear about what your parents think of it now, all these years later.

Thanks so much to all of you for your help in processing this. It has been a huge relief to me to hear people say, "you can do it, and it's going to be great." I feel better about this all the time. We are starting to think this must be our chance for a girl.
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#14 of 32 Old 06-05-2007, 10:13 PM
 
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That must've been quite the shock!
My SIL's friend has 3 post vasectomy kids...apparently it didn't take
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#15 of 32 Old 06-06-2007, 12:50 AM
 
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congrats to you and your dh, it must be ment to be.

My dh just got the big "V" done and I already have 4 kids. #4 was a huge suprise and took me a while to warm up to the idea of another baby. All these stories about babys after a vasectomy are starting to freak me out.
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#16 of 32 Old 10-19-2007, 10:25 AM
 
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congrats to you and your dh, it must be ment to be.

My dh just got the big "V" done and I already have 4 kids. All these stories about babys after a vasectomy are starting to freak me out.
:

Our #4 was a surprise as well but #5 was happily planned
However, all this post V baby talk freaks me out too. DH got his back in May and it's been so nice. This is the first time we haven't had to worry about getting pregnant.

Congratulations MamaScout!!!

 Keri wife and Mama to  Cory 17,  Brendan 15,  Kerianne 8,  Avery 7,  Lilia 3
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#17 of 32 Old 10-19-2007, 11:13 AM
 
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I'm pregnant with our vasectomy baby right now. Althought our story is a bit different. Dh's V "took" but I had quit my birth control before he did the test and I guess there was "left over" in there. I call it "user error". Either that or his super sperm teleported.

I was in COMPLETE shock. I ended up bawling for the first couple of weeks. We already had 2 boys (just turned 1 and about to turn 3 when I got the positive pregnancy test) and we had decided we didn't want anymore for many reasons. We are excited now and I'm due in a couple of weeks. We are going to have 3 boys under the age of 4. :

Congrats!! And 2 kids is rather quite fun. A little harder but I'm sure your ds will be a great big brother and help out a lot.
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#18 of 32 Old 10-19-2007, 11:38 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Well, we did have DH's count checked, and we got the all-clear. But apparently, most doctors do several of those checks over the span of about a year. Wish we had known that, because our dr did only one. And yes, most recommend getting checked at least once a year. We are obviously going to keep our eyes on the situation from now on!

The interesting thing was that when we went in for the second vasectomy, the dr took a look at DH's sperm count and said he'd be thrilled to get those kind of numbers with a vas reversal. So it wasn't just a few swimmers getting through, it was A LOT.

We are doing lots better with adjusting to the news. It's been about four and a half months since we found out, and it's just become "the new normal". We are now delighted that our son will have a sibling, and although we know the first year will be a difficult one, we are looking forward to having two kids.

Oh my gosh, CheapPearls, whew!! I wish you luck! Glad to know I wasn't the only one who had a hard time adjusting to that news.
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#19 of 32 Old 10-19-2007, 01:59 PM
 
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I use to work in a grocery store and you wouldn't believe how many woman where preggo after their dh or whatever had the snip.

Some woman themselves had been 'fixed'




Its amazing how common it really is.
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#20 of 32 Old 10-20-2007, 11:59 AM
 
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Ya know... I shouldn't have mentioned this thread to my dh. We're planning for him to get "snipped" before this one is born. I positively refuse to have my tubes tied... just heard too much about complications and my mom has suffered 25 years of complications from hers. I know the power of mind over matter... and my mind says tubal = BAD. So, I really don't want one. But now dh is thinking I should.

We've already called his sperm "Super Swimmers" because I've gotten pregnant 5 out of 6 times I ovulated near him. I'm not sure I want to give them a chance to learn teleportation. LOL

SAHM of Kayla (11/98) Hunter (8/03) Jo (1/04) : Jared (2/05) Camelia (12/07) Hope/Chance (11/08) and Jack (12/09)
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#21 of 32 Old 10-20-2007, 12:03 PM
 
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Originally Posted by momto l&a View Post
I use to work in a grocery store and you wouldn't believe how many woman where preggo after their dh or whatever had the snip.

Some woman themselves had been 'fixed'




Its amazing how common it really is.
:

I used to work in andrology, and I know *many* who conceived post V or after the women had their "tubes tied".

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#22 of 32 Old 10-20-2007, 04:42 PM
 
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Wow, what a wonderful surprise! Congratulations. Obviously you weren't meant to only have one child . Sometimes we really don't know what's best for us KWIM? I don't know anyone who's V didn't take, but 10yrs after my mom had her tubes tied, Surprise she had my brother.

Atara wife to Joseph mom to Kaleb and Jacob : Caeden Ashlyn : and our angel baby ,:,
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#23 of 32 Old 10-21-2007, 09:42 AM
 
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My youngest aunt was an after V surprise. 10 years after Grandpa had his V, my aunt was born.

My Biology professor told us a story about friends of hers that ended up pregnant after he had a V and nearly caused their marriage to break up. Baby was born, and he knew for sure that baby was his child. She ended up getting her tubes tied, and he had a second V. Several years later--Pregnant AGAIN! So they use 2 to three types of birth control each time they have sex because they have realized that they are very very fertile! OY VEY!

Makes me a bit nervous as well, because I am trying to convince my husband that he should be snipped after we have this baby, and I have a feeling that if he does, we'll still end up pregnant. 3 kids is enough for me! We'll see, I guess.

Best of luck and warm wishes with your new little one!

Karin, Wife to Dear Sweet English Husband~Soon to be Legally American. Mom to Zach~13, Lily~9, Alex~2, and Izzy or Zeke arriving July 2010! Living a life full of LOVE!
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#24 of 32 Old 10-21-2007, 01:19 PM
 
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I keep having the feeling that I'm going to get pregnant with twin boys :. It doesn't help that my dh will not go in for the test to see if the "v" worked. I think the idea of doing you know what into a cup and then taking to someone strange (probable women) who knows what he just did freaks him out.
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#25 of 32 Old 10-21-2007, 04:50 PM
 
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No perm. BC here, but this pregnancy was a suprise. We DTD 2 days past O and thought we'd be 'safe' even though NFP rules say to wait 3 days. I was really upset at first, we did want more kids, just not now. We have a lot of other things going on, including starting a new house in February, so it wasn't the best timeing. It took me about a week for me to finally be kinda happy about it, and get to the point of saying "Hey, we can do this!"... then we found out it was twins! I can honestly say I am jsut so happy now! How incredible that we happened to concieve twins, and they are also both boys, which evened out our family perfectly. Just give yourself time, and it's okay to not be thrilled w/ being pregnant, especially if you get lots of MS in the beginning (like me!).
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#26 of 32 Old 10-21-2007, 06:40 PM
 
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This thread scares me. Seriously. I am PG with #3, which was unplanned. But I get hyperemesis with my pregnancies and this time around I had some serious, life-threatening medical complications due to the hyperemesis. So I know for sure that I am done after this. DH is planning to get a V but it is stories like these that make me wonder if I should get my tubes tied plus use some other form of birth control. BTW, we fall into the *very fertile* category.
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#27 of 32 Old 10-22-2007, 12:20 AM
 
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I'm glad you're happy about it now. Must've been quite a shock!

Just saw this thread and had to tell you... DH was born to a father who'd had a vasectomy and a mom who had an IUD. Born breech on Haloween, too. I have serious questions about him.

Oh, and I was a diaphragm baby... need I even add that it only took us two tries to get pregnant? We'd better be careful with birth control after this til we're sure we're ready for another!

Good luck with everything! Congrats on your little surprise!
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#28 of 32 Old 10-22-2007, 12:40 AM
 
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Sounds like this little soul was coming hell or high water. Congrats!
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#29 of 32 Old 10-22-2007, 12:56 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AngieB View Post
It doesn't help that my dh will not go in for the test to see if the "v" worked. I think the idea of doing you know what into a cup and then taking to someone strange (probable women) who knows what he just did freaks him out.
Yeah, I can understand that completely. With my DH, they gave him the container to take home and told him to return it with the "sample" inside. Perhaps they will do this for your DH. You really should have him checked before you assume it worked.

And to everyone who has said they are worried that their husband's V won't take, remember that only about 1 in 5000 fails. That's 4,999 that do work.
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#30 of 32 Old 10-22-2007, 01:13 PM
 
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Yeah, I can understand that completely. With my DH, they gave him the container to take home and told him to return it with the "sample" inside. Perhaps they will do this for your DH. You really should have him checked before you assume it worked.

And to everyone who has said they are worried that their husband's V won't take, remember that only about 1 in 5000 fails. That's 4,999 that do work.
That's what they did. For about the last 4months the container and lab paper work has been sitting on dh's dresser. Every few weeks I nag him about doing it.:
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