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#121 of 552 Old 08-06-2007, 08:24 PM
 
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experienced mamas have advised me that it's better to move right before than right after.
I'm really glad to hear you say this, we close on our house in December and I'm due in January.
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#122 of 552 Old 08-06-2007, 08:27 PM
 
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Wow - active weekend! I was really going to try to do individual replies, but there's so many!

I'm trying to pick a pouch now - I think we'll get the Kangaroo Korner fleece, since everyone seems to love it. I don't know that we'll buy more until we get her and see what she likes! I wanted a Maya ring sling, but I'm not loving their fabric choices (same for KK, but at least they have grey!).

I've heard mixed things about perenial massage, too... One study found that it actually slightly increased tearing when done before, but so many classes recommend it... That same study found that it DID help when done by the provider during the actual delivery. I'm doing my kegels, but I'm feeling overwhelmed enough without adding it in...

We're also hoping to move after the baby gets here. There's no way we can handle a bigger mortgage while I'm on maternity leave, so we decided to wait. I'm hoping to be into a bigger house by the time she's walking... If we had been able to get our house together to sell early on we might have tried, but I was so sick the first trimester that things fell apart rather than got better!

I'm at a complete loss again on names - once we started talking about middle names I started second guessing our first name choice(s)! Dh's family is all about family names, so we actually decided NOT to go that route.

My mom is now thinking that she's going to do "one day a week" of childcare for us. A nice offer, but it makes both DH and I nervous. She's not exactly responsible!!! My dad has offered and I'm hoping WILL do a couple of days a week, and I think she wants a day just to be fair or something. My dad is super responsible, reliable, patient... My mom is none of those things. It's not like she can't be with dad, either. They're happily married! I'm at a loss as to how to deal with this one - and dh is very firm on not letting her do it by herself... This is a woman that we don't trust to dog sit, because last time when she "forgot" our older dogs medicine, she gave her a double dose the next time. It's not a medicine you can do that with!!! And we, and the vet, were entirely reachable to ask what to do... I can just see her doing something like that with the baby!

32 weeks tomorrow!
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#123 of 552 Old 08-06-2007, 08:39 PM
 
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Yikes, Elizabeth, I wouldn't let her babysit alone either. Why don't you just suggest she join your dad when he babysits, then she gets two days too (but maybe let your dad know it's important he's there, if that wouldn't get back to her) It's a tricky one. I'm glad my family's far away. Honestly I don't know how safe they are. I'm sure they're fine if I'm around, but beyond that, I have real questions about that... for now I'm more comfortable hiring strangers to watch my baby, what does that say? Stay firm, though, don't leave your baby with someone you don't feel comfortable with just because you don't want to offend. Not that you would, it's just, people do sometimes. There's a whole section in "Birthing From Within" on how to negotiate the in-laws. I'm not sure it came up with any solutions, just pointed out that it's necessary to make the "new" nuclear family a priority and stand firm in situations like this. Good luck!
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#124 of 552 Old 08-06-2007, 08:44 PM
 
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Laura, have you posted in Find Your Tribe in the Welcome section? That's how I found my homebirth midwife, last week and I'm 5 months along. I was worried everyone was full, but she's actually on this site and PM'd me herself. Try starting a thread in your new area that you're looking for a doctor. You never know! I had a midwife within a day of posting!
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#125 of 552 Old 08-06-2007, 08:55 PM
 
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Thanks so much for the warm welcome!!!

Julia - I hear you about appreciating the added income when you can get it, especially now! I can also understand how POTO could get super-old by about the 10th run-through, so you must be hearing it in your sleep by now! Staunton is beautiful, and I miss the autumn leaves of the Shenandoah Valley, but I am glad to have left behind the close-mindedness prevalent there.

Christina - I'm interested in hearing about the crab catching trip! Please tell!

PiePie and Elizabeth - The relating to parents is a huge issue for me right now, too. PiePie, it sucks that you are on the receiving end of criticism about your choices for your family. I agree with you about it feeling sneaky - and therefore somehow like maybe you're ashamed of your choice - to keep it a secret. But then with revelation come arguments. Bah. And Elizabeth, that is such a touchy subject to have to try and preserve your mom's feelings by not directly confronting her with her past irresponsibility, but at the same time make choices for your childcare that are safe. I am dealing with a MIL who is exceedingly vocal about NOT wanting us to have children! If you can believe that. She has ranted about everything from her wishing she'd never had kids (in front of DH and BIL), that FIL forced her into it, that we don't have enough $ to have kids, that we have too many animals to have kids, etc. It's bizarre and hurtful. I already give the woman some leeway because she's German - and blunt - but there's no excuse for the kind of behavior she's been showing on this issue. And my FIL does want grandchildren, but won't say so in front of MIL. I was at one point thinking how neat it would be for our kids to grow up bilingual speaking German with their grandparents, but now I don't even want them around each other. I've told my family about the pregnancy, but I want to wait until the end of the first trimester to tell DH's family. He wants to tell on FIL's birthday at the end of September.

Kudos to all of you in the process of or getting ready to be moving. Wow! My thoughts are with you. Moving is never easy. I guess the positive that can come out of it is the opportunity to nest and arrange things the way you like for the baby right from the start

Lacy 35 and Chris 35, DS Jakob 2, and EDD 1/1/11
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#126 of 552 Old 08-06-2007, 09:41 PM
 
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experienced mamas have advised me that it's better to move right before than right after.
That was our thought, too!! It's REALLY hard to deal with the nesting urge, though! All our baby stuff is at the new place, while we're still at our old apartment, which is in disarray because we're packing. Ugh.

eri_flores, it WILL work out. It'll work out no matter what. Your baby will arrive healthy and happy and you'll manage.
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#127 of 552 Old 08-06-2007, 11:44 PM
 
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Welcome Plummom!

Christina & Pink, sorry to hear the morning sickness is kicking in. I agree with Emily's suggestion to eat your way through it. Low blood sugar starts a downward spiral that I couldn't recover from, so I tried to eat a little bit every few hours. It was exhausting - I actually got tired of eating - but it worked.

PiePie and Elizabeth, sorry you're having family issues. I'm not sure how much I trust my mom to take care of my baby by herself - she started me on cereal at 2 weeks! But I'm really lucky that she respects my decisions and will probably do her best to abide by them.

Lane, congrats on making it through the move, stained tank top and all. Sorry you've been feeling down. Big changes like that always throw me for a loop, I crash after I get an adrenaline high from stress.

Emily and Eri, hooray for making the "final" BRU runs! Emily I'm trying to decide on baby carriers right now and think it's so cool that you went to a babywearing meeting! I was scared of ring slings but I think I'm coming around and might order one from Sleeping Baby Productions. I heard about her thru my DDC and the slings look like they're great quality, inexpensive and SAHM-made.

Things are starting to get more real to me. My parents bought me a breastpump from ebay (per my request) and it's sitting in my living room now. I got a little grossed out by the used tubing. : I need to check and see if it works, but I don't know how much suction is right. I toured the hospital "birthing suites" today. Still not sure if I feel more or less confident about birthing in a hospital after the tour. I've also put off the GTT as long as possible and am taking it Tuesday morning. I hope I pass b/c I can't stand the idea of being poked 4 times for the 3 hour test. Actually I'm a huge needle wuss and can't stand the idea of two pokes tomorrow!

Dee, mommy to Miss M 11/07 and little Miss I 5/10/10!
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#128 of 552 Old 08-07-2007, 12:29 AM
 
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Dee, I thought I was the only one who got a breast pump on eBay! You can replace the tubing I think. I plan to, in fact it's recommended to do that. It's the pump that costs so much. I got a Medela pump in style backpack thingie for about 80 bucks. I haven't checked mine either, the whole thing is kind of overwhelming. I'll make DH read the manual and then just show me. (I hate reading manual-type things.) What kind is yours?
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#129 of 552 Old 08-07-2007, 03:14 PM
 
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Woooohoooo!!!!
Grant went in this morning (nothing like visiting FedEX at 5AM). I am soooo tired, but also soooo relieved. If the baby really wants to come out, now he can (although I personally vote for him to cook awhile longer. We have one last daycare interview next week).
I am "working" from home today (ha ha, I was up all night last night - so not much working getting done. I figure I put in my hours) - I think I am off to go take a nap I'll check back in with you ladies later!
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#130 of 552 Old 08-07-2007, 03:36 PM
 
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emily, i was up till 3:15. it sucked. i used to do this all the time. i kept swearing, NEVER AGAIN! not that i haven't said that before. :
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#131 of 552 Old 08-07-2007, 03:40 PM
 
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I didn't sleep last night either! Not for work, though, just DH stayed up too late and I already don't sleep well. Then I woke up really early. I think I maybe got 4 good hours? I'm hoping to sneak a nap in my office at some point!

Thanks for the support on the family stuff... Between my mom and my MIL I'm just really cranky and annoyed with them both! One more week with MIL at least...
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#132 of 552 Old 08-07-2007, 03:40 PM
 
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Grats, Emily on getting it done and in the mail! I bet that is a big weight lifted off your shoulders!

Well, I picked up my first maternity clothes this weekend. I got a really nice skirt for $5 at a consignment shop and then a pair of pants at Target. I was really needing stuff for work as my normal work clothes were getting a little tight and uncomfortable.

So, anyone who analyzes dreams, explain this one to me. LOL. My mom passed away 7 years ago (sudden heart attack so not a long illness) and every so often she will pop up in my dreams, she never speaks to me in my dreams, but I know what she is thinking most of the time. In this dream last night, I went to visit her--she was in the hospital with tubes coming from everywhere and she took one tube out to light a cigaratte and smoke and I told her I was pregnant and she said something (wow she actually talked to me in my dream!!) but because she had taken this tube out to smoke I couldn't understand her--it was like a whisper. I woke up really annoyed. She finally talked to me and I still didn't hear what she said. LOL.

I'm waiting anxiously for my dr appt next week. I'm hoping I don't get any crap when I tell them I decided i'm not doing the PAP.

Glad to hear everyone is doing well and I can't wait to see baby pictures from you August mamas!! PS Here is a picture of my niece born 7/30/07.
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#133 of 552 Old 08-07-2007, 03:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Wow, I guess it was the night to go to bed late. I think I finally got in the bed around 2pm and I just laid there for a while trying to fall asleep. I was up processing wedding photos and sending email to clients. Luckily I work from home so was able to sleep until about 9.

Emily, congrats on getting your grant proposal done! That must feel like a load off your back.

Judy, I'm not sure how to interpret your dream. Do you have any idea about what she was thinking this time? Was your mom a smoker or was this unusual behavior for her to be smoking at all? Mackenzie looks like a cutie pie!
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#134 of 552 Old 08-07-2007, 04:05 PM
 
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Judy...congrats on your niece! She's beautiful!

Emily...yay! Congratulations on getting your grant done! You must feel really relieved.

DH and I just met our doula for the first time. We love her! She is very knowledgeable, passionate about childbirth, and encouraging. She was describing labor pain as a "super-duper menstrual cramp", nothing more. Man I hope she's right! She's the one who turned my thinking from going to the hospital to going au natural, so she's already earned her money as far as I'm concerned!

Dee, how are you coming on finding a doula?
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#135 of 552 Old 08-07-2007, 04:15 PM
 
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Judy, I'm not sure how to interpret your dream. Do you have any idea about what she was thinking this time? Was your mom a smoker or was this unusual behavior for her to be smoking at all? Mackenzie looks like a cutie pie!
She was a heavy smoker and was the type of person that would have taken a tube out to smoke... lol. Nope, no clue what she was thinking. Oh well. It doesn't bother me, sometimes I just think it is funny, like she is teasing me on purpose! LOL.
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#136 of 552 Old 08-07-2007, 05:05 PM
 
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Yeah, I didn't get really good sleep last night either. My cause was my poor, aching back, or more like butt. I have always had sciatic pain every now and again, but it is definitely worse now. The pain is really horrible. I am going to try to do some stretches and exercises to help. I really hope that this won't be an ongoing thing.

librarian mommy (34) to DD (2/08), expecting a BOY in early spring 2011
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#137 of 552 Old 08-07-2007, 09:36 PM
 
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I didn't sleep well last night, either. I stayed up late reading a book, so it wouldn't distract me today. I went to bed about 11:30, woke up about 3:30 and finally got up around four, my mind freaking out about the whole doctor thing. I went back to bed about five or so and slept for a couple of hours. I spent part of the morning packing the bathroom (which is as done as what it can be until Saturday) and the bedroom which is almost finished. I'm going to finish it before bed. I have to. There's stuff on the bed. Tomorrow I plan on finishing the basement and the back living room. Thursday and Friday will be spent on doing the kitchen and pantry. I want to be done on Friday so I can spend Saturday doing nothing. Plus, there is a lactation class at Babies R Us I want to go to. Andy said I should go, but he also wants to go to the Habitat work day on Saturday, assuming he has his stuff done.

I got dressed to go to the Bible study at church my bra feels tight, and it's my nursing bra. (I got two and am only wearing one for now, to "save" the other. Until I go too big, I would still wear an older bra around the house.) ugh

Happy day,
Laura
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#138 of 552 Old 08-07-2007, 10:48 PM
 
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Congrats Emily!

That is a huge deal & you must feel so relieved. Last time you turned in a huge grant application... you got pregnant! Funny how it's come full circle - I can't believe you're full-term already. That's sparkling grape juice up there w/ the balloons but you deserve real champagne!

Julia
I got the confidence to get my breastpump from ebay when I heard that you successfully did it. I actually got exactly the same kind as you did (not being a copycat, it just seemed highly recommended & I like the backpack). They're so expensive and sometimes barely get used. I checked it out this evening & the pump seems to run fine. I'm so glad you love your doula! I'm stuck on finding one and basically have come back around to the one who might not be available for my birth. The others cost almost 2x as much! Another has atrocious typing skills/email etiquette so I haven't even called her. Is that bad?

Judy
your niece is adorable! Sorry I don't have much input on your dream either, but from what you described it sounds like she was teasing you by talking inaudibly. Maybe the dreams will get more intense during pregnancy and you'll finally hear what she has to say.

Aimee I've had sciatica pain off & on and I sympathize with you - it really sucks. Even though walking sounds like the opposite of what you want to do, it seems like a daily walk prevents the pain.

Laura oh no your nursing bra is too tight? Maybe you could get a cheap sports bra to tide you over. I have some that hook in the back (no pulling over the head) and have good wide adjustable straps. I really like them & they were only about $5 at walmart.

My GTT is over and I get the results tomorrow morning. I think I passed since I didn't feel bad during the wait. I started to get a headache toward the end of the hour but I think that was from lack of water and caffeine. I'm so excited I just found out that I have a local Craigslist! Shopped thrift stores this morning for gliders and changing tables but didn't have much luck. Now I have several leads at Craigslist! Yay!

Dee, mommy to Miss M 11/07 and little Miss I 5/10/10!
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#139 of 552 Old 08-08-2007, 12:47 PM
 
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Depressed. I think I have that muscle separation thing in my abs. I bought the "Mummy Tummy" book CJ recommended a month ago, loaned it to a coworker, never saw it again, and now it's too late. Except, the bulge is above my navel, not below. I'm so discouraged. Is my body ever going to be the same? I honestly thought my abs were stronger than that! They were one of my best feature...I had the definition line on either side of my abs, so not a six-pack but definitely defined. Now it's gonna be all loose and bulgy. And this is only my first kid.

How selfish am I that this is all I can think about right now? Also I'm worried about how much worse this is going to make my back pain...and maybe that's why my back hurts more now. Argh. Is anyonen else experiencing this?
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#140 of 552 Old 08-08-2007, 01:11 PM
 
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I got dressed to go to the Bible study at church my bra feels tight, and it's my nursing bra. (I got two and am only wearing one for now, to "save" the other. Until I go too big, I would still wear an older bra around the house.) ugh
I went to www.upperbreastside.com and I got 2 nursing bras -- one sleeping bra by Bravado that gets pulled over the head and one more supportive "sports" bra by Anita that's fancier than your usual sports bra. both expand 2 cup sizes. i too found one to be too tight around the chest, but they said it was sized properly and that my rib cage is just sensitive right now (which i know independently to be true). they offered to sell me an extender but i couldn't justify the extra expense -- it might go away as baby drops a little more, and will certainly go away when i have the baby! I also got a pair of nursing PJ's. I passed on the Soothies they were trying to push on me, but when I got home and checked out the BFing forum I felt like I should have bought some.
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#141 of 552 Old 08-08-2007, 01:14 PM
 
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[QUOTE=Down_to_Earth;8840481]. Plus, there is a lactation class at Babies R Us I want to go to. Andy said I should go, but he also wants to go to the Habitat work day on Saturday, assuming he has his stuff done.
/QUOTE]

DH came to our BFing class at www.realbirth.com It was an AWESOME, DO NOT MISS class, and almost everyone had a partner with them. The instructor would specifically address the non-pregnant partner: "this is where you can help by doing x." DH set up my nursing throne last night. He just needs to assemble the stool.
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#142 of 552 Old 08-08-2007, 01:31 PM
 
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Congrats Emily!

That is a huge deal & you must feel so relieved. Last time you turned in a huge grant application... you got pregnant! Funny how it's come full circle - I can't believe you're full-term already. That's sparkling grape juice up there w/ the balloons but you deserve real champagne!

Thanks Dee (and everyone else who gave me congrats and positive grant vibes). Ironically, this grant is a resubmission of the grant I put in when I got preggo! Here's hoping that the second time is charm :

Dare I even ask how the dissertation is going (or will it make you start avoiding me in the halls )?

Elizabeth - I just wanted to comment on the mom thing. Neither DH nor I feel comfortable leaving the babe with my mom either. It isn't that she is a completely irresponsible human being or anything - I let her take care of my dogs (so your situation sounds waaay worse than mine), but she is very distracted all the time and does a lot stuff without thinking. She also is almost completely deaf so she would not be able to respond to the child if he was out of her sight and crying. I think once the babe is more grown up and able to understand about how to get grandma to attend to him, we will relax a little. But until then, no undersupervised time with the baby.

Laura Sorry you are feeling so stressed out about the doctor situation. I really hope you find what you want/need. I agree that the area Find Your Tribe is a great resource!

Judy I don't have any really great insight into your dream - I have always felt that you need to know the dreamer really well to be able to interpret someone elses dream. But, I do believe that we can interpret our own dreams. If you think she was teasing you, she probably was

Aimee Can you go see a chiro about your back pain? I hate to say this to you, but left untreated, your pain will only get worse (much worse) during pregnancy. You need to be really careful with sciatic pain - sometimes stretching can feel good at the time, but end up making it worse. If you cannot get to a chiro, please try to enroll in a prenatal yoga class with an EXPERIENCED teacher. Pregnancy is really hard on our bodies and it is super important that you take good care of yourself!

Julia Sorry about your tummy sweetie I am right there with you. I was very vain about my stomach before getting preggo - it was very flat & toned. I actually do NOT think the ab separation happens because of "weak" stomach muscles. I suspect it is due to overuse of stomach muscles. The strongers your muscles were before pregnancy, the harder it may be to stop using them (to do "normal" things - like sit yourself up in bed...this is the biggest one for me, or lifting). My understanding is that the separation heals after the babe is born. Hang in there!!!
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#143 of 552 Old 08-08-2007, 02:56 PM
 
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Emily...that makes a lot of sense, I noticed today that I do still use my tummy muscles to sit up all the time, (like the 6 times a night I get up to pee) and I thought, "Maybe I shouldn't be doing that!" Thx I prefer to think it's because my abs are SO totally awesome that they're separating Whether it's true or not...

Just found out some good news and some bad news... my friend who was pregnant with twins is in fact only pregnant with one viable baby...the other just shows an empty sac She is mad at herself for being sad! That makes me even sadder... it's a loss, right, you can mourn! But then my other friend (the one I visited in MT in May) told me she's 11 weeks pregnant! Apparently they were TTC for a year and she had one m/c around the time I got pg so she didn't want to tell me she was going through that

Ah,the trials and tribulations we women go through... but the good news is that I have you guys, and also two of my best friends are pg with me now! How fun!
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#144 of 552 Old 08-08-2007, 05:06 PM
 
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Looks like we have another graduate!
nikkihoi had her baby (a boy!) on Aug 04. If you are interested in reading about it, she posted in the Sept. DDC HERE
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#145 of 552 Old 08-08-2007, 05:12 PM
 
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Depressed. I think I have that muscle separation thing in my abs. I bought the "Mummy Tummy" book CJ recommended a month ago, loaned it to a coworker, never saw it again, and now it's too late. Except, the bulge is above my navel, not below. I'm so discouraged. Is my body ever going to be the same? I honestly thought my abs were stronger than that! They were one of my best feature...I had the definition line on either side of my abs, so not a six-pack but definitely defined. Now it's gonna be all loose and bulgy. And this is only my first kid.
I have it badly too - have for several weeks now. It's not your ab muscles, but the ligaments that hold them together, so the muscles' strength isn't really the issue. I have one really good friend that had it really badly. While she did get stretch marks, she also has a six-pack. So, you can get it back! I had a really toned stomach and small waist before pregnancy and I'm hoping that they come back! It was my favorite thing about my body! My primary care doctor also had it with both of her pregnancies and it went away by itself after the births... I've been told NOT to work out my abs at all for two weeks after the birth, and then to start with the Tupler technique again... We'll see!
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#146 of 552 Old 08-08-2007, 07:13 PM
 
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Grace, do you have power? thank god we do. however, my commute was so screwed up this morning that i jumped ship and came home after spending almost three hours and getting less than a third of the way there. i was supposed to work from home but have just slept. this cold is still kicking my ash.
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#147 of 552 Old 08-08-2007, 08:15 PM
 
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There's a power outage on the east coast? Ours is fine but MAN is it freakin' hot here! I've stayed inside all day. Sorry for the commute from he$$!! Glad you got to come home instead. Good plan.

Midwife visit today for the first time... it was funny, the doggies have never seen anything like it... the blood pressure cuff, the hand-held dopplar to check the hb... they were oh-so-curious and just licked her half to death. I really like her, and am really glad I'm doing it this way now. She suggested a maternity belt to help support the belly might help my back pain. Anyone try one of those yet?
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#148 of 552 Old 08-08-2007, 10:56 PM
 
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yeah, my friend in woodley park is out.
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#149 of 552 Old 08-09-2007, 12:55 PM
 
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Emily what's a dissertation? : I've mentally moved my date of graduation from December to May b/c there's no way I can finish everything in the next 12 weeks. Now I just need to talk to my advisor about that plan & funding it.

Julia I'm sorry you're dealing with ab muscle separation, ugh. I've never tried a maternity belt but it seems like a good idea, especially if your MW recommends it. Ever since Elizabeth mentioned it I've been paranoid and check for separation all the time. I try to use my arms to get myself out of bed and pull in my stomach (but not use it) when I get up or sneeze or do anything that could stress those muscles. Yay for having real live preggo buddies! I agree, it must be a weird mix of emotions to lose one twin but see that the other is thriving. Another downside of u/s I guess - back in the day they never would have known.

Natalia I was thinking about you this morning (as I was looking at my swollen fingers . How are you and those hands? Is your baby head down?

Dee, mommy to Miss M 11/07 and little Miss I 5/10/10!
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#150 of 552 Old 08-09-2007, 04:58 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MajorGroover View Post
Emily what's a dissertation? : I've mentally moved my date of graduation from December to May b/c there's no way I can finish everything in the next 12 weeks. Now I just need to talk to my advisor about that plan & funding it
I hear ya sweetie!
If it makes you feel any better, I moved my expected graduation date from May to August (and finally to Dec!). I figured what the heck, as long as it is still in the year 2005, nobody is any the wiser, right
Good luck with the funding conversation - I was very fortunate to have secured my own funding for my last two years, so staying a bit longer wasn't that big a deal.
Just remember to write at least one sentence a day. Not painful at all, just one measley sentence. You can totally do that. Then, hopefully, by the time you feel ready to really work on your diss again (I am going to guess some time after the the New Year) you will actually have accomplished quite a bit in a very easy manner.
BTW, if you ever need to "cheat" on your sentence a day thingie, do your Method section - I always find it to be the easiest section to write (especially if you already have a proposal and all you need to do is change from future to past tense)
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