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#181 of 568 Old 10-22-2007, 08:54 PM
 
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Originally Posted by clintonhillmama View Post



ummmm....do you ladies know anything about female ejaculation?

....because either i experienced it for the first time last night.....

-OR-

....i peed all over dh:.

only funny remarks necessary, i can't believe i'm even admitting this!

at least we've determined that my water's not broken!
The only reason I know the difference is I push and squeeze, DH says I (tmi) tighten and then he feels the moisture.

IME Pee leaves stains, FE doesn't.

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#182 of 568 Old 10-22-2007, 09:45 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Nursingmama05 View Post
The only reason I know the difference is I push and squeeze, DH says I (tmi) tighten and then he feels the moisture.

IME Pee leaves stains, FE doesn't.
My FE has left a white stain-is that bad? Sometimes it doesn't leave a stain though.

Karen, mother to a wonderful active three year old.
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#183 of 568 Old 10-23-2007, 07:40 AM
 
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As far as the peeing in the bath, when I was going through my bout of reoccuring UTIs, THEE only way that I could pee with out peeing a flame-thrower was sitting in a clear warm water bath. It still hurt, but it didn't make me want to leap out of my skin. So I'd sit, read, drink cranberry juice, and pee over and over. Then I'd get up and soap up all areas of my body that was in the water, except my yoni (soap there during UTI *shudders*) and rinse off. It was gross--geez, I haven't even told my husband this--but it was the only relief I had during my UTIs.

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#184 of 568 Old 10-23-2007, 09:21 AM
 
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OMG, I finally had to see why this thread had made it to ten pages...all I can say is, I am so proud to be part of this DDC!

I have no such weirdness going on. I can still reach to wipe and pee in a cup. My pee smells normal. I am not constipated. My poop has never shifted to transverse while on its way out. My vulva/vagina/yoni does not stink, although it does smell a bit different. I have not had any discharge. I have no cat stories, because if I had had a cat, my dog would have eaten her my now.

I do have a little dog story. I always sleep naked (helps air out my girl parts) and this morning when I got up, my dog walked over to me and stuck his nose in my (naked) crotch. He got a very bewildered look on his face, cocked his head, and looked very concerned. Then he "harrumphed" and made a quick retreat for his bed. Poor kid. If only he knew what strange smells he has to look forward to.

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#185 of 568 Old 10-23-2007, 09:43 AM
 
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I always sleep naked (helps air out my girl parts) and this morning when I got up, my dog walked over to me and stuck his nose in my (naked) crotch. He got a very bewildered look on his face, cocked his head, and looked very concerned. Then he "harrumphed" and made a quick retreat for his bed. Poor kid. If only he knew what strange smells he has to look forward to.
LOL. That's awesome.

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#186 of 568 Old 10-23-2007, 01:23 PM
 
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Originally Posted by expectantmami View Post
My FE has left a white stain-is that bad? Sometimes it doesn't leave a stain though.
I've never had mine leave stains, they're might be some other juice that leaves white marks on the sheets but they always come out.

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#187 of 568 Old 10-23-2007, 03:43 PM
 
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Originally Posted by MoreThanApplesauce View Post

I have no such weirdness going on. I can still reach to wipe and pee in a cup. My pee smells normal. I am not constipated. My poop has never shifted to transverse while on its way out. My vulva/vagina/yoni does not stink, although it does smell a bit different. I have not had any discharge.
are you sure you're pregnant???

i'm jealous!!!
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#188 of 568 Old 10-23-2007, 09:18 PM
 
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are you sure you're pregnant???

i'm jealous!!!
I can still wipe too, but it's quite the sight trying to work with the belly and a toddler who is potty (and genital obsessed right now.

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#189 of 568 Old 10-23-2007, 09:22 PM
 
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I can still wipe too, but it's quite the sight trying to work with the belly and a toddler who is potty (and genital obsessed right now.
now you're just bragging!
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#190 of 568 Old 10-23-2007, 09:47 PM
 
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now you're just bragging!
haha I won't be able to wipe for much longer! I have to sit on the toilet sideways to be able to wipe

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#191 of 568 Old 10-23-2007, 11:58 PM
 
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I am about to poop for the second day in a row, and that THRILLS me. YAYYYYYY!!!!! Pooping TWO DAYS IN A ROW? It's the best gift ever! I thought this week would be awful since I'm at my parents' house and away from my psyllium husk, but apparently my childhood home, site of the worst constipation I've ever had, makes my pregnant bowels wanna release. Hey, I'll take it!

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#192 of 568 Old 10-24-2007, 05:01 PM
 
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OK I don't feel so bad about my stinkiness--I was exposed twice to an incredible almighty RANK STANK today. -Well used ladies restroom- Hubby and I went out to see a movie today, and the theater was busy. I HAD to use the restroom before the movie and there was both a line entering and leaving the 30+ stall restroom. Um, Yeah. musky-poopy-urine-period topped with fake apple scent smell times a bazillion!

And, yes, I really had to go again right after the movie. Was about enough to make one's eyes water!

I like my stink now

Karin, Wife to Dear Sweet English Husband~Soon to be Legally American. Mom to Zach~13, Lily~9, Alex~2, and Izzy or Zeke arriving July 2010! Living a life full of LOVE!
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#193 of 568 Old 10-26-2007, 09:28 AM - Thread Starter
 
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OMG 10 pages of stink...

I just wanted to share, thought this was really funny:

My 4 yr old ds's favortie book right now is called "diareah" from the dr's office (You know, the immodium ad they make look like an "informational book." )



He makes me read it to him for bedtime.
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#194 of 568 Old 10-26-2007, 09:29 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I am about to poop for the second day in a row, and that THRILLS me. YAYYYYYY!!!!! Pooping TWO DAYS IN A ROW? It's the best gift ever! I thought this week would be awful since I'm at my parents' house and away from my psyllium husk, but apparently my childhood home, site of the worst constipation I've ever had, makes my pregnant bowels wanna release. Hey, I'll take it!
Are you taking iron?

If so, I highly reccomend floradix iron+herbs. Its non constipating and I havent had any issues yet!
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#195 of 568 Old 10-26-2007, 10:57 AM
 
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Are you taking iron?

If so, I highly reccomend floradix iron+herbs. Its non constipating and I havent had any issues yet!
There's some iron in my prenatal, but it's not constipating me any more than without, since I tried going without it for a bit to see if that'd help. I have been constipated my entire life. I have the worst hemorrhoids right now too. : Figures this would happen when I'm away from home and my Tucks pads!

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#196 of 568 Old 10-26-2007, 06:52 PM
 
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WooHoo! I had "The Fart of Death" today! It is that special fart that sounds just like a perfect fart should, and makes your partner just about die, whilst you smell nothing! Zach's bio dad got to experience that, and today my husband got a whiff of it too!

Bwahahahahahahahahahaha! I amuse myself sometimes!

Transformed--the diarrhea book--Too flippin' funny! hahahahahahahaha!!!

Karin, Wife to Dear Sweet English Husband~Soon to be Legally American. Mom to Zach~13, Lily~9, Alex~2, and Izzy or Zeke arriving July 2010! Living a life full of LOVE!
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#197 of 568 Old 10-31-2007, 12:56 AM
 
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WHAT???!!?!?!?? The BEST thread EVAH was stuck on page 3?????

I'm so disappointed in you ladies......I go to Nashville for one weekend, and you stop being stinky??

Sigh.....I guess it means I'm the real source of the stench, hmm?


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#198 of 568 Old 10-31-2007, 02:44 AM
 
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The hubs and I showered together yesterday, and I haaaad to pee really bad. I told him a while ago that my pee STINKS lately and the smell makes me sick. Anyway, I said, "I really have to pee... I can't hold it for another second and I don't want to waddle out of the shower all wet and slippery." He sighed and said "...okay... just pee down the drain," rolling his eyes at how gross his wife is. So I did. And OH GOD. THE SMELL. He couldn't stop going on about it for a while. He was like "AAAUUUGH YOUR PEE SMELLS HORRIBLE" for like 10 straight minutes.

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#199 of 568 Old 10-31-2007, 10:42 AM
 
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WHAT???!!?!?!?? The BEST thread EVAH was stuck on page 3?????

I'm so disappointed in you ladies......I go to Nashville for one weekend, and you stop being stinky??

Sigh.....I guess it means I'm the real source of the stench, hmm?

no, i still stink. although the weather has finally cooled down, so it's a bit more contained!!!
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#200 of 568 Old 10-31-2007, 07:55 PM
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OMG. Last night I coughed and I peed everywhere. Like all down my leg, onto the floor. My 3 year old laughed at me. :
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#201 of 568 Old 11-04-2007, 01:02 AM
 
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This thread made me laugh so hard I wet my pants and was crying snot all over the place. Hubby thought something terrible had happened and I kept trying to tell him I was laughing but he was ready to call 911!!! I couldn't catch my breath to tell him to chill out.

This thread needs to be made into a book!!!
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#202 of 568 Old 11-04-2007, 01:03 AM
 
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This thread made me laugh so hard I wet my pants and was crying snot all over the place. Hubby thought something terrible had happened and I kept trying to tell him I was laughing but he was ready to call 911!!! I couldn't catch my breath to tell him to chill out.

This thread needs to be made into a book!!!
Ah, the Dec 2007 DDC... bringing joy to the hearts of pregnant mamas, and fear to the hearts of their loved ones, one page of stink at a time.

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#203 of 568 Old 11-04-2007, 01:29 AM
 
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Oooh! I had another fun urination experience this morning!!

So, dh and I did some "taxes" last night (heheheh....okay, that's stupid, but it's what he said one afternoon when we put cartoons on and locked the bedroom door and dd asked what we were doing, so now it's our favorite code word), and I think I have a bit of a varicosity, because my labia pretty much always feel like they are dragging around 5lb weights these days. Not fun. And even worse after sex.

So, we DTD and it was good (it always is at the time, it's only afterward that I regret it!), but I woke up this morning reeeeally sore!

So, I have this squishy gel ice pack, and I stuck it inside a sock and put it in my underwear while I was making breakfast. It felt great!

A little while later, I needed to pee, so I took the ice pack out, tossed the sock in the wash and put the gel pack back in the freezer, and went to the bathroom. And I was STUNNED when I unexpectedly started peeing FIRE!!!!

Ohmigosh, it was like molten urine--like mere degrees from boiling point!! And the only thing that my brain could process was the memory of my midwife's voice, reciting the questions she asks every visit.....specifically, the "Any itching, burning, or irritation while urinating?"

I had never considered the question in that light before....I always thought of "burning" more as "stinging". But now all I could think was "What is "boiling urine" a symptom of?" I was seriously ready to give her a call!


Fortunately, I calmed down and my ability to reason returned before I finished washing my hands. OF COURSE if you use an ice pack on a body part for several minutes, you are going to lower the temperature of the skin in that area. And then if you put hot liquid in contact with the cold skin, the hot liquid will feel even hotter than it really is!

That's why my mom wouldn't let us take hot baths after playing in the snow when we were little!

So yes, I'm a doofus, and no, my pee wasn't really boiling.

But ice packs are great for sore hoohaws!

Sarah, Queen of Hearts, raising a Full House with Michael, King of my Heart!
DS (2/02), DD (3/04), DS (1/06), DD (12/07), and DS (3/10)
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#204 of 568 Old 11-04-2007, 01:35 AM
 
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Best Pee Story Ever.

ETA: Hey! I wrote that all in caps! Silly auto-formatting. Oh well, read it as if I wrote it all in caps, ok?

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#205 of 568 Old 11-04-2007, 01:50 AM
 
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When I told dh, he just silently shook his head and looked at me with that "do I really want to procreate with this woman? and is it too late to change my mind?" look.

I'm starting to get used to that look....

Sarah, Queen of Hearts, raising a Full House with Michael, King of my Heart!
DS (2/02), DD (3/04), DS (1/06), DD (12/07), and DS (3/10)
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#206 of 568 Old 11-04-2007, 05:46 AM
 
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That was a hilarious story, SheBear! If only because I've used an ice pack for my PSD the last few nights. I'll have to remember not to worry about molten lava temperature pee afterward!

My stinky contribution for the day- I have been farting like CRAZY lately! They're not actually stinky, though, just loud. Loud enough that our 6 y/o dachshund was sitting next to me and I let one rip. The dog (who drinks pee out of dd's potty chair, btw...so it's not like he's all prim and proper either! ) gave me the funniest look and bolted off. Like he was disgusted with me. It's bad when you're scaring away dogs that eat trash and poop with your farts!
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#207 of 568 Old 11-06-2007, 02:47 PM
 
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Not stinky, just TMI.

A couple of pages back female ejaculation was brought up. Now I have known for a long time that I can do that, so has my husband, and he is super cool with that. Last night however, Niagra Falls was dry compared to me.... that isn't the worst part....oh this is sooooo embarassing...but I haveta say it......






Hubby got his beard soaked!!!! aaahhh


*runs and hides now*

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#208 of 568 Old 11-06-2007, 02:52 PM - Thread Starter
 
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i just wish I could have sex.

I am trying to want to!
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#209 of 568 Old 11-06-2007, 03:01 PM
 
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Random thought...can you imagine how much worse this thread would be if it were the men who had the babies? They're smelly enough as it is--if they could get pregnant they'd turn into weapons of biological warfare.

Jen, journalist, policy wonk, and formerly a proud single mama to my sweet little man Cyrus, born at home Dec. 2007 . Now married to my Incredibly Nice Guy and new mama to baby Arthur.
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#210 of 568 Old 11-06-2007, 03:53 PM
 
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Hubby got his beard soaked!!!! aaahhh


*runs and hides now*
That is HILARIOUS.

And I agree, Jen, because I feel enough like a weapon of bio warfare. I can't imagine if my husband's stench level increased as dramatically as mine has.

And I feel you, transformed... lately even if I am in "the mood" it just seems like such a hassle, and after all my B-H contractions like crazy last week I am kind of nervous anyway.

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