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please rethink using the term Blessingway to describe your baby shower*new info*

51K views 273 replies 101 participants last post by  bioshannon 
#1 ·
with all due respect and kindess, i would like to ask anyone considering using the term Blessingway to describe their baby shower to reconsider this.
in my town, lots of women choose to use this term because they wish to create a more spiritual celebration for their baby shower. this is a wonderful idea, and i think it should be done more. however, we need to use a more appropriate term to describe this.
the Blessingway is a very important part of the Dine (Navajo) tribes traditions. use of this word to describe anything but the actual ceremonies performed by members of this tribe is very disrespectful.
i doubt anyone who has used this term has ever intended to be offensive or disrespctful, so please don't think i am saying that. i just want to encourage you to create your own traditions rather than appropriating other traditions that already belong to other people.
Mother Blessing
Baby Blessing
Way of Blessing
Blessing the Way
any combination of these would suffice to symbolize what your intentions are without taking something from someone else.we can be influenced, inspired etc. by traditions and cultures outside our own, but i think we have a responsibility to be respectful of the original tradition and culture that we are influenced and inspired by.

http://pregnancy.about.com/gi/dynami...%2F4-1pg2.html

scroll down to see the added footnote


Quote:
"1. In 2004, Native feminists wrote us to request that the term 'Blessingway' no longer be used to describe non-Navajo prenatal ceremonies such as the one described in this article. They explained that the term 'Blessingway' refers to a sacred spiritual ceremony performed by the Navajo people to celebrate rites of passage that occur throughout the entire life cycle, and not only the passage into motherhood. They suggested the term 'Mother Blessing' was a more appropriate term for a ceremony that was influenced, and respectful, of this tradition, but not practiced in accordance with the Navajo faith and culture. We completely agree.

Out of repect for the great history and importance of the Blessingway to Navajo people, many doulas, midwives and mothers now use the term 'Mother Blessing' to denote the celebration outlined in this article -- a practice we have also adopted."

Edited on 11/11/07 to add new information:
many people have said that their blessingway's are NOT based on the Dine's...well i have been looking around at all the many many many Blessingway website's and EVERY SINGLE SOLITARY one says that the "new blessingway" is based on the Dine's Blessingway.

http://www.mother-care.ca/blessing.htm http://www.preggiepeggy.com/blessingway.htm
http://www.mothering.com/articles/pr...blessings.html
http://www.naturaltouchdoula.com/blessingway.php
http://www.alternamoms.com/blessingway.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blessingway
http://www.naturalbirthandbabycare.com/blessingway.html
http://thebirthsource.homestead.com/blessingway.html
http://www.doubletongued.org/index.p.../blessing_way/
http://www.timelessspirit.com/SEPT04/grace.shtml
http://www.castingcreationsbellycasts.com/gpage4.html
http://www.feministmormonhousewives.org/?p=667
it's not even arguable that the "new blessing ways" are not directly influenced from the Dine'
Blessing Way.

also, i have been communicating with a Dine Medicine Woman for the last week or so, and i have shared with her the link to this thread and also the many website's describing exactly what the "new blessingway" entails. she has given me permission to share this with you:


Quote:
I am a Dine' Medicine Woman who is infuriated by what I have heard! These women have NO idea what they are doing! The Blessing Way is an ancient Ritual that, yes is used to welcome children into the world, but by far, that is NOT it's only use, but just one of many of it's functions. I am not permitted to explain the many times we use Blessing way in ritual, but some of the rituals would be surprising for those not of the Dine'. Anyone not of the Dine' people should not be using our Sacred rituals bastardized in such a way for their own idealized mentality - it is more dangerous then they could possibly realize. We have certain "spiritual safeguards" on protecting our Old Ways & what is misused or misappropriated would have dire consequences for those who try to take what is sacred to us & is not of their people, but of the Dine'. To place this upon innocent babies is an anathema With much thanks, Firewolf
 
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#253 ·
I've only read the first 10 pages or so.

One of the pillars of Islam is to go on a journey to Mecca. It is called a Haj. The (rather poor) English translation of this word is Pilgrimage. Now say I were to go on a journey of religious significance. I would call it a pilgrimage and not a haj. Should Muslims be offended because I used the word Pilgrim? I would expect them to be offended if I called myself a Haji after I had gone. That would be inaapropriate of me to do so. But the word pilgrim is kind of generic and not related to their journey.

Now relating to a blessingway. I understand the original name is a Hózhójí. I really don't understand why the (rather poor) English translation to this word is more offensive than calling it a Mother blessing ceremony. I have never used the word blessingway, I would probably use the Mother blessing ceremony, because nobody I know would understand what a blessingway was. But I really don't see how it would be offensive to anyone what I would call my ceremony. Neither Mother Blessing nor Blessingway convey the original meaning of Hózhójí.
 
#254 ·
I think what I'm understanding is that the Dine have been so culturally seperated from their language that in order to communicate even with each other, they have to use English for many things. Blessingway is their attempt to translate the Dine word into English and avoid using English words that were already in use...so its a term they coined. Pilgramage is a word that was in frequent use and was just applied to the idea of a Haj, because it was the closest English word in use, it isn't a term that muslims coined trying to rename Haj in a language that most of them used even if it wasn't their original tongue.

People who are using Blessingway are using a term the Dine feel they coined to represent the Dine word (I don't know if the Dine really did coin that term or not) If some other group insisted they coined it too at the same time independently I guess they'd have to duke it out. If no one else does claim that than it seems like not such a big deal to just let them have that term.

Of course I'm biased because I think Blessingway sounds awkward and I prefer other terms better.
 
#255 ·
I have read this entire thread over the past couple of hours, and my mind didn't settle until JacquelineR started posting. I think that had BellyMama explained in the beginning (not that she should have known we needed to be told) how much power a word has, *some* of the arguments may not have started.

Quote:
Basically, it's not "just a name" or "just a word". In Native American beliefs, the name *is* the thing. This is why Natives who follow a traditional path will not name their children for a living relative. By naming their child *for* that person, they take some of that person's life power.
I think the essence of the thread is that some people honour (without necessarily understanding) many aspects of the Blessingway, and feel that there is something lacking in the baby-shower culture of today. Hopefully, upon hearing that the name, in itself, has life power they will choose to find a term that is powerful for themselves.

Damn, I hope I managed to say what I mean. If not - I'll use the pregnancy-brain card too!
 
#256 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Belle View Post
Now relating to a blessingway. I understand the original name is a Hózhójí. I really don't understand why the (rather poor) English translation to this word is more offensive than calling it a Mother blessing ceremony. I have never used the word blessingway, I would probably use the Mother blessing ceremony, because nobody I know would understand what a blessingway was. But I really don't see how it would be offensive to anyone what I would call my ceremony. Neither Mother Blessing nor Blessingway convey the original meaning of Hózhójí.
Imagine I came to your country, put you on a tract of land 1/20th of what you used to live on, and told you that you could only speak my language. Then, when your children and grandchildren knew very little of your language, I said "Sure, speak your own language. Oh, and we're taking back these words you've taught your children to describe the ceremonies which are sacred to you (which you did illegally, by the way, good for you). They're ours. Sucks to be you. Hope your family learns your language in the 2 years you have left to live."
Is your opinion still the same?
 
#257 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Belle View Post
I've only read the first 10 pages or so.

One of the pillars of Islam is to go on a journey to Mecca. It is called a Haj. The (rather poor) English translation of this word is Pilgrimage. Now say I were to go on a journey of religious significance. I would call it a pilgrimage and not a haj. Should Muslims be offended because I used the word Pilgrim? I would expect them to be offended if I called myself a Haji after I had gone. That would be inaapropriate of me to do so. But the word pilgrim is kind of generic and not related to their journey.

Now relating to a blessingway. I understand the original name is a Hózhójí. I really don't understand why the (rather poor) English translation to this word is more offensive than calling it a Mother blessing ceremony. I have never used the word blessingway, I would probably use the Mother blessing ceremony, because nobody I know would understand what a blessingway was. But I really don't see how it would be offensive to anyone what I would call my ceremony. Neither Mother Blessing nor Blessingway convey the original meaning of Hózhójí.
i don't know how many times i have mentioned this in this thread but because the NA's were FORCED in most cases into using english, this point is totally moot. if you have been FORCED to take on a language then you shouldn't be blamed when you use it. i get what your point is, but this argument to me is weak sauce...it just doesn't hold.
anyway, Christmas is also known as Noel by the French, Navidad in Spanish and Grischtdaag in German...but it's the same damn holiday. you see? it doesn't matter what language you say it in, it's the same.
 
#258 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by herins View Post
I have read this entire thread over the past couple of hours, and my mind didn't settle until JacquelineR started posting. I think that had BellyMama explained in the beginning (not that she should have known we needed to be told) how much power a word has, *some* of the arguments may not have started.

I think the essence of the thread is that some people honour (without necessarily understanding) many aspects of the Blessingway, and feel that there is something lacking in the baby-shower culture of today. Hopefully, upon hearing that the name, in itself, has life power they will choose to find a term that is powerful for themselves.

Damn, I hope I managed to say what I mean. If not - I'll use the pregnancy-brain card too!
i agree that a lot of the issues have arisen because of the cultural differences that non-NA have with the NA in terms of how they use names.
 
#259 ·
Whiel I do have the utmost respect for native american (actually more correctly termed aboriginal americans since any american born on US soil is a "native" american" - this was just pointed out to me recently by an Elder friend of mine - I am of the Cherokee Nation) I do have to raise one issue. The Dine' nation doe snto hav ethe copyright on the term "Blessingway".

I had a blessingway for my second daughter - which was performed BY a medicine woman and a Shaman. Though not in the Dine' tradtion it was nonetheless called a blessingway by those performing the Rite. And yes - friends and family WERE incorportated into the rite as well.

Educate oneself by all means but remember this. All of the tribes were originally brances of the same Nation and therfore many of their traditions, ceremonies and paths are very similar if not virtually identical.

Thatsaid - what ever celebration I have for THIS child will nto be a blessingway - the medicine woman has since crossed the Bridge and I no longer live near the Shaman that was present either.
 
#260 ·
I think it's just as offensive to hold a Blessingway and call it your own as it would be for someone to circ and hold a Bris and call it their own. Borrowing from another culture can be a respectful thing, IF and ONLY if the exact cultural expectations are followed, and not merely refined to suit the outsider's party flavor of the month.

In short, knowing Native cultures' ceremonies are highly sacred, I find it profusely offensive and disrespectful to hold a Blessingway without either being Dine, or following exact Dine customs and receiving blessings for the ceremony AS the outsider. Otherwise, it's no different than physically taking what is not yours.
 
#262 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by herins View Post
I have read this entire thread over the past couple of hours, and my mind didn't settle until JacquelineR started posting. I think that had BellyMama explained in the beginning (not that she should have known we needed to be told) how much power a word has, *some* of the arguments may not have started.
......Hopefully, upon hearing that the name, in itself, has life power they will choose to find a term that is powerful for themselves.

Still TOTALLY disagree.

The Navajo/Dine don't use the word "blessingway." They use the word "Hózhójí." Blessingway is not even a direct translation!

XOXO
B
 
#266 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by BethSLP View Post
Still TOTALLY disagree.

The Navajo/Dine don't use the word "blessingway." They use the word "Hózhójí." Blessingway is not even a direct translation!

XOXO
B
Yes, there is a specific word in the Dine language, but as Native languages and traditions are dying out (thanks to white Americans' oppression of natives) it becomes even more important that we respect what tiny things that they have held on to and ask us to leave sacred to them.
 
#267 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by 3pink1blue View Post
call it whatever you want. no one is going to know anyway.
Except for the people you invite, who then think nothing of it and tell all the other people they know expecting a baby about this "cool new thing" and then they tell others . . .

And since when does others not knowing about something make it okay to do?
 
#268 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Kells97 View Post
Except for the people you invite, who then think nothing of it and tell all the other people they know expecting a baby about this "cool new thing" and then they tell others . . .

And since when does others not knowing about something make it okay to do?

: And this is how this whole cultural appropriation mess happened in the first place!

 
#271 ·
Oh man

I just read this entire thread....all 14 pages and now that I am utterly exhausted and have to go cook some dinner I will say that I really enjoyed reading every post even the heated ones (ok especially the heated ones)


I enjoyed greatly learning about something that I was totally and utterly unfamiliar with. I had no idea there was even such a thing as a blessingway. I had a frilly stupid baby shower with lots of gifts, but the primary motivation behind that was that I couldn't afford all the stuff I need for DD and my fam was happy to help...I feel so unenlightened now!
:

I will certainly never use the word blessingway to refer to, well pretty much anything now except the actual dine ceremony or ritual, which I doubt I will ever witness! If certain members don't want it said no skin off my back. I have thought about it a lot but it basically comes down to a very superficial thought process for me...

"Ok so you don't want me to use that word for a babyshower or any kind of ceremony, cool! Thanks for the heads up"

Then again I think my brain is fried from trying to read this entire thing in one sitting!

Bump bump for one of the most interesting topics I have read about on here!
 
#273 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by futurmama8 View Post
bumpity bump

great thread, seeing a lot of this (having blessingways) on MDC lately.
I just saw the one, and I think she's Navajo!

I wonder how this caught on... I've always thought 'sprinkle' was a fun word if you don't want a 'babyshower'
 
#274 ·
Surprisingly, your statements about baptism aren't correct. Any baptized person can legitimately baptize another person, baby or not, including in the Catholic church. You don't need a priest, though one is encouraged. Same is true for marriage! This is from an official Catholic website:

While the Church has an extended rite of Baptism which is normally celebrated, which includes roles for both parents and godparents, the essentials of that rite are two: the pouring of water over the head of the person to be baptized (or the immersion of the person in water); and the words "I baptize you in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit."

Since the form of baptism requires just the water and the words, the sacrament, like theSacrament of Marriage, does not require a priest; any baptized person can baptize another. In fact, when the life of a person is in danger, even a non-baptized person-including someone who does not himself believe in Christ-can baptize, provided that the person performing the baptism follows the form of baptism and intends, by the baptism, to do what the Church does-in other words, to bring the person being baptized into the fullness of the Church.

I had no idea that this was true until my priest mentioned it in passing at a baptism yesterday. Really interesting.
 
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