When your husband wants you to get an abortion..WWYD? Aother Update in OP. - Page 4 - Mothering Forums

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Old 07-21-2008, 09:35 PM
 
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To the OP: I haven't read the whole thread (I did read your OP and the update), and I don't know what your relationship with your hubby was like before you were sick everyday. BUT I know from personal experience that the anti-nausea meds make a HUGE HUGE difference. I've been really sick too, to the point of thinking, "This is DEFINITELY the last baby!" (It's only #2 for us and I always thought I wanted more.) I've been seeing an OB/GYN for prenatal care (long story, but it's the best option in my very small town). She prescribed phenergen and when I threw that up, Zofran. It's expensive (thank goodness for insurance!) but it WORKS. I know my personality changed when I was so miserably ill. Now I've got "ME" back!

If you're willing to consider the anti-nausea meds, even as a short-term option, they might make a big difference for you too.

No experience on the other front, sorry. But take care of yourself!

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Old 07-23-2008, 05:47 AM
 
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bumping the thread up to see how you are doing!

Happily married with two tots (babyboy.gif J 10/18/08) & (babygirl.gif T 5/03/10) 

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Old 07-23-2008, 09:13 PM
 
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I'm hoping that the fact that we havent seen an update from you means you have found a safe place to stay and someone who is helping you out. I am praying for you and your kiddos and your protection. If you do get an opportunity to use a computer, please let us know how you are.. Youve got a LOT of worried momma's here and were all routing for you!
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Old 07-24-2008, 01:03 AM
 
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The way he has been treating you is totally inappropriate and unacceptable. He should really be supporting you and your pregnancy and especially your other two children because he has no idea how it is for us women to carry and birth our babies, much less raise them. Your husband is being extremely selfish and mean to you and you do not have to tolerate that in any way, shape or form. I know you feel sick and worried and you're pregnant so you're tired and just not ready to be messed with. I would definitely not recommend terminating your pregnancy. Terminating your pregnancy changes you in ways that you cannot fully understand, both emotionally and physically. I know it's hard because H's attitudes are really cruel and it's confusing because this baby was planned and now he wants a termination. I know it is difficult with 2 children and being pregnant again is not making anything easier. ( I have two little ones, I know how it is). Please consider not terminating your pregnancy...there are support networks and centers for what you are going through. Please let me know if there is anything that I can help with and if you want to talk or need support. Jamie
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Old 07-24-2008, 01:10 AM
 
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The way he has been treating you is totally inappropriate and unacceptable. He should really be supporting you and your pregnancy and especially your other two children because he has no idea how it is for us women to carry and birth our babies, much less raise them. Your husband is being extremely selfish and mean to you and you do not have to tolerate that in any way, shape or form. I know you feel sick and worried and you're pregnant so you're tired and just not ready to be messed with. I would definitely not recommend terminating your pregnancy. Terminating your pregnancy changes you in ways that you cannot fully understand, both emotionally and physically. I know it's hard because H's attitudes are really cruel and it's confusing because this baby was planned and now he wants a termination. I know it is difficult with 2 children and being pregnant again is not making anything easier. ( I have two little ones, I know how it is). Please consider not terminating your pregnancy...there are support networks and centers for what you are going through. Please let me know if there is anything that I can help with and if you want to talk or need support. Jamie
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Old 07-28-2008, 12:04 AM
 
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It's been a while since we've heard from the OP. I was hoping that a bump might help? I sure hope you are okay, mamma.

married to the love of my life : and mamma to 3 amazing kids DS1 DS2 : and DD , ::
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Old 07-28-2008, 01:34 AM
 
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I'm getting a little worried now too. I certainly hope you and your LO's are in a safe place.

wife to DH 2/03, mama to DS 3/03 & DD 1/09
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Old 07-28-2008, 01:38 AM
 
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Wow. I'm sorry, but I would never talk to the man again. My ex did this to me. He's long gone, and thank god for that. He still doesn't see his kids. Doesn't want to. They deserve better, and so do you. Being a single mom isn't bad and much more emotionally healthy than staying in a relationship with a man who tries to guilt you into an abortion or adoption or anything.

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Old 07-28-2008, 02:39 AM
 
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From the outside in it seems the answer is simple:

It's him or the baby. What decision can you look yourself in the mirror every day and live with?

If DH called me a bitch he'd be sleeping at his mother's for a good long while. If he called me a whore he'd never be coming back, and we have three kids and I've known him since I was 14. That is insane. It sounds like maybe he's having second thoughts and he needs to talk to someone supportive (other than you), outside the situation. I also suspect there's somethign going on behind the scenes he isn't discussing with you- some kind of stressor and this is just the trigger that brought out his inner stress. God only knows what, but that's what my gut tells me.

Kristina in Kitsap County, WA
Doula, Student Midwife, Mama, Wife & More
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