Is there a book everyone reads called "What to say to a pregnant woman"? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 64 Old 08-13-2008, 11:58 AM - Thread Starter
 
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"You look like you're about ready to pop"
"Any day now, right?"
"You're going to have your hands full"



-Caitrin

Me whistling.gif Wife / SAHM / Musician/ Actress/ Queen of this castle. Progeny: William (January 2007), Tristan (November 2008) and expecting Lukas stork-boy.gif due January 2012!!  lactivist.gif femalesling.GIFwaterbirth.jpg dishes.gif

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#2 of 64 Old 08-13-2008, 11:59 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Ah! I meant to post this in I'm Pregnant. Please move?

Me whistling.gif Wife / SAHM / Musician/ Actress/ Queen of this castle. Progeny: William (January 2007), Tristan (November 2008) and expecting Lukas stork-boy.gif due January 2012!!  lactivist.gif femalesling.GIFwaterbirth.jpg dishes.gif

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#3 of 64 Old 08-13-2008, 02:36 PM
 
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Haha - replace all of those comments w/ "You look great!"

Mom to James (ribboncesarean.gif 5/2006), Claire (vbac.gif 6/2008), furry kitties Calvin and Bob, and wife to Dennis. 

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#4 of 64 Old 08-13-2008, 05:26 PM
 
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"So when's the baby due?" (For the fiftieth time in a day, you're forced to go through this cliche conversation on auto-pilot).

"You're still pregnant?!"

"Are you sure . . . ?" (Said by another mother with a screaming toddler).

In God we trust; all others must show data. selectivevax.gifsurf.gifteapot2.GIFintactivist.gif
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#5 of 64 Old 08-13-2008, 06:19 PM
 
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You could borrow my mom's favorites:

"yeah that happened to me too, then I found out what caused it"

And

"I hope that's not contageous"

~Dawn
 
Blah blah blah
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#6 of 64 Old 08-13-2008, 11:40 PM
 
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"Wow your butt is huge"

"You shouldn't be eating/drinking that"

Those are apparently staples in the book that everyone, pregnant or not has read.

obstruct livery vehicles

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#7 of 64 Old 08-13-2008, 11:46 PM
 
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I swear to you - a lady at my church asked me the other day -

"Are you sure you're not having twins?"

THREE TIMES!

Yeah - I kid you not. One time, cute, two times, not so cute, three times....yeah.....it was hard to stay patient. *laughing*
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#8 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 12:53 AM
 
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Wow, you still have X months left? Are you sure?

You must be having twins! No, seriously!

Are you STILL pregnant? (Asked daily by the same coworkers, duh)

When are you due?

Don't __________eat____do____lift___move____drink____tha t! You'll_____miscarry___kill the baby___hurt yourself___have a stillborn!


Wow, your legs are swollen!

(Said after a cough or sneeze) That's what you get for DTD! (As if you get sick from being pregnant?)

Wow, you've put on weight! Next time use a condom!

Mama to expecting Babe 2
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#9 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 12:59 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Celticqueen View Post
Ah! I meant to post this in I'm Pregnant. Please move?
Done.

I'm also at some of these. Especially
Quote:
Don't __________eat____do____lift___move____drink____tha t! You'll_____miscarry___kill the baby___hurt yourself___have a stillborn!
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#10 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 01:03 AM
 
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So, who's the father?

Is it a boy or a girl?, promptly followed by

WHAT? How can you not get an ultrasound? How will you know if everything is alright?

And, finally, with any and I mean any sign of pain, discomfort, fatigue, etc:

Are you in labour? Shouldn't you go to hospital or call an ambulance or something?

Single mom to E (2004) and D (2010)
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#11 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 01:26 AM
 
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I feel like every conversation I have (and my dh has) after becoming pregnant goes like this:

"What are you having?" (A baby. People can't believe that people either wouldn't find out the sex or wouldn't want to tell a complete stranger.) "When are you due?" "What names are you thinking of?" (Even from people in the grocery store.)

This short convo is usually followed by some anecdote involving the words, "Thank God they were at the hospital!" What do people expect us to say, "Yep. If that were our baby it would probably die." Ugh.:
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#12 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 03:08 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by soso-lynn View Post
And, finally, with any and I mean any sign of pain, discomfort, fatigue, etc:

Are you in labour?
This is my mom... We live together to save on rent and it was also originally to keep my nephew and son close together as they've grown up together and are like twins.. Anyways, if I make a funny face or breathe in deep or pat my leg or well anything, she's right there asking if I'm having a contraction or in labor... Hello ma, you are gonna be there for the labor and birth dont you think I'd tell you if I was feeling something?!

I love her but sheesh come on already.

I dont even chat with my friend Tracee anymore because everytime she texted me or im'd me she's asking if I've had contractions yet... before i would've told her but now forget it, I just want to be left alone.

I just *love* when they ask you if you are still pregnant and they are standing right in front of you.. Like oh yeah but I thought the baby was old enough to take care of herself so I just left her at home. duh!

Nichole, wife to Kris SAHM to Timothy : :10-11-03, Hosanna , Seraphim 8-17-08 : caught by Grandma! Faith 1-4-10 : Caught by Daddy!
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#13 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 05:26 AM
 
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"You must be having a daughter. She stole all your beauty."
(I knew someone who actually had this said to her by a random little old lady)

"Let touch your belly!" (usually said by a complete stranger if they even say anything)

Enjoying the adventure of NFL with my partner-in-crime , DD 03.09 , , &
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#14 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 09:48 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Red_Lil_Mamma View Post
"You must be having a daughter. She stole all your beauty."
(I knew someone who actually had this said to her by a random little old lady)

"Let touch your belly!" (usually said by a complete stranger if they even say anything)
OMG!!!!!!!!

Wife to the most amazing man and the funniest little girl born Sept 2007-- belly.gifIt's a boy! January 2012

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#15 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 10:06 AM
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Yes, it is in book stores on the shelf next to:
The complete book of ridiculous things to say to a postpartum Mother, which includes some classics such as
When are you due? Uh I am holding a newborn baby...what do you think?!
You look great, you were quite overweight last time we got together! Uh thanks, I was carrying a 7 pound baby in my belly.
Which hospital did you deliver at? At home.
What, but terrible/ horrible/ awful things could have happened! Uh yes, but miraculously here I am standing talking to you with my perfectly happy healthy baby.
You have your hands full...they look like trouble! Uh actually "they" are children, can hear you and we made quite an effort to get them!

Everyone I knew said all the ones mentioned by pps and is there a bonus chapter in the book that encourages the sharing of horror pregnancy/birth stories by complete strangers?

wbg...constantly amazed by Z , cherishing I , inspired by P , adoring K and still getting butterflies when I wake up with B !
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#16 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 10:09 AM
 
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Maybe I'm weird but it doesn't bother me when people ask me the same questions when I'm out and about. I like sharing my due date and talking about the baby, etc...

Not that I like the rude comments, however!
I'm so shocked at what some people will say (or think they can tough your belly)!! I will usually say something to a very rude comment.

When I see a pregnant woman out and about and the opportunity presents itself, I always tell her how beautiful she looks.
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#17 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 11:07 AM
 
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This is why I like to stay inside:

"are you SURE you aren't having twins--like really sure?"
"maybe there are two in there"
"Woah, you are HUGE"
"It seems like you've been pregnant forever"
"It looks like the baby dropped already" (this was when I was barely seven months)
"I was like that with my first, I gained A TON of weight...and you're not even to the last trimester--where the baby actually gains weight"

Mama to DD (10/8/08) and expecting someone new in November!
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#18 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 11:44 AM
 
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"Was this an Accident?"

Um - NO! Actually, I know it's hard to fathom that some people have pleasant birthing experiences and aren't actually SUFFERING through their "job as a wife" to provide exactly one boy child and one girl child but my husband and I ENJOY our kids! *laughing*

Actually - my husband put one lady in her place upon the third time hearing this question and said:
"No it isn't. A car wreck is an accident. This baby is a fantastic human being who will be a blessing to our family."

Even IF it were an unplanned pregnancy would you seriously slap the label "accident" on your child? Can you imagine! "This is Evan, our oldest, Brianna, our girl - and oh yeah. That's the Accident." Ugh.

/rant over
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#19 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 11:46 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wbg View Post

Everyone I knew said all the ones mentioned by pps and is there a bonus chapter in the book that encourages the sharing of horror pregnancy/birth stories by complete strangers?
Yep. It comes with a checklist "How to create the most horrific birth story to tell other mothers...."

*rolls eyes*
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#20 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 01:11 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Crystal_R View Post
"Wow your butt is huge"

"You shouldn't be eating/drinking that"

Those are apparently staples in the book that everyone, pregnant or not has read.
Oh my gosh- no one has said that to me yet...And there will be trouble if they do

-Caitrin

Me whistling.gif Wife / SAHM / Musician/ Actress/ Queen of this castle. Progeny: William (January 2007), Tristan (November 2008) and expecting Lukas stork-boy.gif due January 2012!!  lactivist.gif femalesling.GIFwaterbirth.jpg dishes.gif

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#21 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 01:17 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by white_queen_22 View Post
"Are you sure you're not having twins?"
Aaargh! I get that one all the time! And it is always followed by:

"Are you sure?"

So I tell them I had an u/s and am positive. And then they usually say:

"Well, the other one could be hiding."


Angela , wife to DH (Oct 1999), mother to DD (Oct 2008)
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#22 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 01:54 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Celticqueen View Post
"You look like you're about ready to pop"
"Any day now, right?"
"You're going to have your hands full"



-Caitrin
Uh yeah, people started saying that to me when I was only 6 or 7 months along!

Book lovin librarian nerd mama to Caleb 6/06 and Aiden 4/09: and 1 angel 11/07. "No one cries alone in my presence."
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#23 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 02:09 PM
 
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For those of us who gestate past 40 weeks:

"Your doctor LET you go this long?"

Thank you. Because I was not aware that I had to ask permission to use my own vagina.:
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#24 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 02:22 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by soso-lynn View Post
So, who's the father?
OMG rudeness!

-Caitrin

Me whistling.gif Wife / SAHM / Musician/ Actress/ Queen of this castle. Progeny: William (January 2007), Tristan (November 2008) and expecting Lukas stork-boy.gif due January 2012!!  lactivist.gif femalesling.GIFwaterbirth.jpg dishes.gif

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#25 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 02:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by white_queen_22 View Post
"Was this an Accident?"

Um - NO! Actually, I know it's hard to fathom that some people have pleasant birthing experiences and aren't actually SUFFERING through their "job as a wife" to provide exactly one boy child and one girl child but my husband and I ENJOY our kids! *laughing*

Actually - my husband put one lady in her place upon the third time hearing this question and said:
"No it isn't. A car wreck is an accident. This baby is a fantastic human being who will be a blessing to our family."

Even IF it were an unplanned pregnancy would you seriously slap the label "accident" on your child? Can you imagine! "This is Evan, our oldest, Brianna, our girl - and oh yeah. That's the Accident." Ugh.

/rant over
That's awesome what your dh said!!

-Caitrin

Me whistling.gif Wife / SAHM / Musician/ Actress/ Queen of this castle. Progeny: William (January 2007), Tristan (November 2008) and expecting Lukas stork-boy.gif due January 2012!!  lactivist.gif femalesling.GIFwaterbirth.jpg dishes.gif

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#26 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 03:26 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by white_queen_22 View Post
"Was this an Accident?"
I got this one from several people when we told our friends we were expecting. I was to say the least.

Claire, mommy to Robbie (8/23/08) and Brena (4-22-11) and wifey to Joe
 
 
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#27 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 04:09 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TanyaS View Post
For those of us who gestate past 40 weeks:

"Your doctor LET you go this long?"

Thank you. Because I was not aware that I had to ask permission to use my own vagina.:
Love the response!!!
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#28 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 05:16 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Red_Lil_Mamma View Post
"You must be having a daughter. She stole all your beauty."
(I knew someone who actually had this said to her by a random little old lady)
OMG! That's terrible!!! Although I did have a similar comment made when I told this guy I work with I was having a girl -- he said, "I know, I can tell by your face."

WTF does that mean? I got ugly? Geez!

I've also gotten:
"How much weight have you gained?"
"Are you peeing a lot?"
"What are you craving?"
"Better take good care of those kids in there," (I'm pg with a singleton, definitely...)

There must be a book somewhere that people read that has all these wonderful things in there, where else would people get half this stuff from?!?

Carrie SAHM to Nora Caitlyn (5) and Finnley Dax (2) homebirthing, breastfeeding, babywearing, intactivist, doula mama!         
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#29 of 64 Old 08-14-2008, 05:46 PM
 
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When I told the ladies at my stitching group (who are older than me by at least 25 years) that I was pregnant, the often obnoxious, outspoken lady (who is at least 70 and loves tanning beds ) said, "Was it planned?"

Uh, no. I've only been talking about TTC for over a year. Yeesh.
This is the same woman who, after finding out I planned to use a m/w with our daughter, gave me The Look. I'm sure all of you know what I'm talking about.

Of course, 2 years later, here we are planning another m/w assisted birth and THIS time--horrors!--we're planning a HOMEBIRTH!!! I can't wait to see her eyes pop out of her head when I mention that.

SAHMtranstichel.gif to DD1joy.gif(9/06), DD2energy.gif(4/09), DS1 kid.gif (1/11), and DS2 wild.gif (2/12)
knit.giflactivist.gifsigncirc1.gif Surprise! pos.gif #5 due 12/16/13 2ndtri.gif

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#30 of 64 Old 08-15-2008, 09:44 AM
 
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<<"Your doctor LET you go this long?"

Thank you. Because I was not aware that I had to ask permission to use my own vagina.<<

LOLOLOLOL!

My last baby was at 43 weeks. A gigantic and dangerous 7 lb-er.
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