WAS - another plea...NOW -discussion about Diapering - Page 17 - Mothering Forums
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#481 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:17 PM
 
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Originally Posted by lovebug
what? there is no right or wrong way to live it.
One might argue that, as the cretor of the term "Natural Family Living" and as the found of the natural family living community, Peggy O' Mara has earned the right to define her own terms.

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#482 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:23 PM
 
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Then please tell us, in detail, how you define and live a Natural Family Life.

I can see why NFL was brought up here. Whether or not one is promoting/supporting/living (whatever) the NFL life is pertinant to this discussion because postings here at MDC that are made to support certain practices are supposed to reflect the beliefs of Mothering, the magazine and the main site. To be sure, there have been, and can be, discussions ABOUT non-NFL topics, but the question some here have raised is:

"Is it appropriate to have entire threads on MDC dedicated to the encouragement of behaviors that blur the line between NFL and Mainstream, when this is meant to be an NFL site?"

That's a question I'm now pondering, and that many here are having an intelligent discussion about.

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#483 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:23 PM
 
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Originally Posted by annettemarie
One might argue that, as the cretor of the term "Natural Family Living" and as the found of the natural family living community, Peggy O' Mara has earned the right to define her own terms.
true. however i feel my point still stands

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#484 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:23 PM
 
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Frankly, I don't care how other people spend their money. It might not be a choice I would make, but you know, whatever. HOWEVER, the "old" board was much more difficult to navigate. There was too much fluff in between the "meaty" infomation-filled posts, and too many people treating diapering as if it were their own personal old girls' club. I remember all sorts of posts being moved because they had absolutely nothing to do with diapering, and people whining and saying "But this is MYYYYYYY BOOOOOOAAAAAARRRD"- they had no interest in venturing out anywhere else on MDC. It was cliquish. I think the new organization gives everyone what they want. No one is being censored, no one is being told they can't share (well, except in the few cases I have seen where people were made to feel like their diapering items weren't "good enough"). I'm less concerned with other people's perceived overconsumption, and more concerned with the exclusionary nature of the old board.

And goodcents, for what it's worth, I understand what you are saying. I wouldn't take breastfeeding advice from someone who never breastfed, or discipline advice from someone who never had children. Lovebug, she may have made an incorrect assumption, but you are being unneccesarily rude and antagonistic.

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#485 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:24 PM
 
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Originally Posted by lovebug
true. however i fell my point still stands
You fell your point still stands? I don't even know how to begin to decipher that, nor can I discern what your "point" is.

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#486 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:26 PM
 
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Originally Posted by annettemarie
And goodcents, for what it's worth, I understand what you are saying. I wouldn't take breastfeeding advice from someone who never breastfed, or discipline advice from someone who never had children. Lovebug, she may have made an incorrect assumption, but you are being unneccesarily rude and antagonistic.
well im sorry you feel that way
the point is you dont have to take advice from them but here you should support them!

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#487 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:26 PM
 
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Originally Posted by annettemarie
You fell your point still stands? I don't even know how to begin to decipher that, nor can I discern what your "point" is.
ummmm i did edit!!!!!

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#488 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:30 PM
 
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Originally Posted by lovebug
well im sorry you feel that way
the point is you dont have to take advice from them but here you should support them!
What are you talking about? Supporting people in something they aren't actually doing? Supporting people in their right to give advice they know nothing about? Supporting other people's choices even if you disagree with them? Supporting people's right to be exclusionary? Support is a nice fluffy word, but not everyone subscribes to the whole "support everyone no matter what" theory of living.

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#489 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:31 PM
 
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Originally Posted by lovebug
ummmm i did edit!!!!!
So you did, but I still don't get your point. Is it that we each should be able to define natural family living however we want to?

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#490 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:34 PM
 
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Originally Posted by annettemarie
So you did, but I still don't get your point.
and you dont have to its my point my thoughts. just like i dont get yours. hmmmm funny how that works!

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#491 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:36 PM
 
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Originally Posted by lovebug
and you dont have to its my point my thoughts. just like i dont get yours. hmmmm funny how that works!
Yes, but I am not pleaing for everyone to adapt my point. Really, if you don't want people to try to understand what you are saying (and believe me, I am trying) why even participate in the conversation?

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#492 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:36 PM
 
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::knock knock::

Is this thing on?

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#493 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:37 PM
 
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and PS i dont give advice in boards that i know nothings about!

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#494 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:38 PM
 
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Originally Posted by lovebug
and PS i dont give advice in boards that i know nothings about!

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#495 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:38 PM
 
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Originally Posted by fullofgrace
::knock knock::

Is this thing on?
I can hear you just fine, sweet thang!

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#496 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:39 PM
 
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Originally Posted by annettemarie

And goodcents, for what it's worth, I understand what you are saying. I wouldn't take breastfeeding advice from someone who never breastfed, or discipline advice from someone who never had children. Lovebug, she may have made an incorrect assumption, but you are being unneccesarily rude and antagonistic.
Thank you AM.

I am not participating with this person anymore since this is a "discussion" board and not an arguement board. The ignore button really comes in handy sometimes
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#497 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:40 PM
 
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Originally Posted by annettemarie
Yes, but I am not pleaing for everyone to adapt my point. Really, if you don't want people to try to understand what you are saying (and believe me, I am trying) why even participate in the conversation?
because i can. i am trying, but i do know that you cant change the way EVERYONES mind works! and with that said whos the one pleaing?

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#498 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:41 PM
 
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I can hear you just fine, sweet thang!

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#499 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:41 PM
 
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Thank you AM.

I am not participating with this person anymore since this is a "discussion" board and not an arguement board. The ignore button really comes in handy sometimes
:

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#500 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:43 PM
 
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Trying one last time...

Lovebug, this was for you. Could you please answer, instead of shouting at other posters, so this discussion may continue?

Quote:
Originally Posted by fullofgrace
Then please tell us, in detail, how you define and live a Natural Family Life.

I can see why NFL was brought up here. Whether or not one is promoting/supporting/living (whatever) the NFL life is pertinant to this discussion because postings here at MDC that are made to support certain practices are supposed to reflect the beliefs of Mothering, the magazine and the main site. To be sure, there have been, and can be, discussions ABOUT non-NFL topics, but the question some here have raised is:

"Is it appropriate to have entire threads on MDC dedicated to the encouragement of behaviors that blur the line between NFL and Mainstream, when this is meant to be an NFL site?"

That's a question I'm now pondering, and that many here are having an intelligent discussion about.

And with that. :

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#501 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:44 PM
 
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Thank you AM.

I am not participating with this person anymore since this is a "discussion" board and not an arguement board. The ignore button really comes in handy sometimes
I'm discovering that myself.

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#502 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:45 PM
 
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Originally Posted by DaryLLL
Just in the last few days, I have seen them making birth anncts or talking about interrior decoration in Show ands Tell, etc. I think this is called being exclusionary, something CM seems to frown upon.
I missed the interior decoration thread, but Im pretty certain I know what you're referring to as the birth announcement thread. Perhaps you missed the pictures of newborn fluff on a newborn. Actually seeing the way diapers fit on babies is very helpful, at least IMO, in helping decide what dipes I want to use.

There's one thing about hyenas that I've yet to see mentioned. Not all hyenas have huge massive stashes that hardly get used. I just counted, and I have 16 diapers, 2 wool covers, and 1 pair of longies that I use for my dd. (I do have some stuff that's too small and not being used, but I've tried selling it.) Would it be better if I sell my $100 diaper and replace it with a couple of prefolds?
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#503 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:46 PM
 
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Originally Posted by lovebug
because i can. i am trying, but i do know that you cant change the way EVERYONES mind works! and with that said whos the one pleaing?
You just keep on arguing simply because you can then. I am going to discuss with people who actually want to have an open-minded conversation.

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#504 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:48 PM
 
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You just keep on arguing simply because you can then. I am going to discuss with people who actually want to have an open-minded conversation.
and you keep coming back for more? hmmmmm sounds like we have the same prob?

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#505 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:49 PM
 
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AM, every single forum on this board is cliquish. Some are even exclusionary. I can give you a list but I am sure you know which ones I mean. To say that TAO doesn't have it's own "Old Girl's Club" makes me laugh. Half of them are posting on this thread.

And the fluff between the meat? That is what makes it fun! Hell, lets get rid of all the fluff posts at MDC and ONLY allow people to talk about serious things the pertain only to NFL as defined by the great PeggyO. No heartwarming threads about cute things your baby does while nursing. No "Increase your posts" threads.

There are obviously a lot of complaints about the 'old" diapering board. Full of Grace likes the split because of organization. So do you. EFT and DLLL (my~hearts~light, Kathryn and more) think that we are non-NFL and should be banned from MDC for over consumption. Can you see why some of us are upset? To sit there and say that we don't contribute to MDC, that we aren't NFL, that we over consume, that we are braggarts and make fun of the less fortunate. Wow.

Why don't we like the split again?

I have said this before and I will say it again:

It wouldn't have bothered me if the mods and CM said, "Hey. We think things are confusing here. We are going to change it up a bit. Anyone have any input?"

But it wasn't. Pynki (I think) posted a thread in Q&A saying that frugal diapering and hyena diapering needs to be seperated. That we were out of control and she didn't like it. And a few others jumped in. I think more people were against it than for it. But the Mods said, you are right. Frugal diapering and hyenas need to be seperated. We are working on it.

Well that pissed me off and it still does. All this crap about how it was done for organizational purposes is just that: CRAP. We were told we were embarrassing and we are still being told that.

Warms the heart, it does.

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#506 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:52 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by spatulagirl
AM, every single forum on this board is cliquish. Some are even exclusionary. I can give you a list but I am sure you know which ones I mean. To say that TAO doesn't have it's own "Old Girl's Club" makes me laugh. Half of them are posting on this thread.

And the fluff between the meat? That is what makes it fun! Hell, lets get rid of all the fluff posts at MDC and ONLY allow people to talk about serious things the pertain only to NFL as defined by the great PeggyO. No heartwarming threads about cute things your baby does while nursing. No "Increase your posts" threads.

There are obviously a lot of complaints about the 'old" diapering board. Full of Grace likes the split because of organization. So do you. EFT and DLLL (my~hearts~light, Kathryn and more) think that we are non-NFL and should be banned from MDC for over consumption. Can you see why some of us are upset? To sit there and say that we don't contribute to MDC, that we aren't NFL, that we over consume, that we are braggarts and make fun of the less fortunate. Wow.

Why don't we like the split again?

I have said this before and I will say it again:

It wouldn't have bothered me if the mods and CM said, "Hey. We think things are confusing here. We are going to change it up a bit. Anyone have any input?"

But it wasn't. Pynki (I think) posted a thread in Q&A saying that frugal diapering and hyena diapering needs to be seperated. That we were out of control and she didn't like it. And a few others jumped in. I think more people were against it than for it. But the Mods said, you are right. Frugal diapering and hyenas need to be seperated. We are working on it.

Well that pissed me off and it still does. All this crap about how it was done for organizational purposes is just that: CRAP. We were told we were embarrassing and we are still being told that.

Warms the heart, it does.
you took the words right out of my mouth!

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#507 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 12:54 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Nikel1979
I missed the interior decoration thread, but Im pretty certain I know what you're referring to as the birth announcement thread. Perhaps you missed the pictures of newborn fluff on a newborn. Actually seeing the way diapers fit on babies is very helpful, at least IMO, in helping decide what dipes I want to use.
I was trying not to be specific, as talking about other threads goes against the UA. But for some reason, the mods seem to be letting a lot of things slide on this thread, so if I make a comment on the above, please, mods, don't single me out.

The first post of that thread had a labor annct. It had one pic of a newborn layette. Then it was updated several times to announce the birth and to show a few more pix of diapers on the newborn.

Then followed 8 or so? pgs of congrats. The entire thread, except for the OP, was off topic to the forum. And this kind of chit-chat is not allowed on Show and Tell, so the thread visited several fora as a result.

Having an 8 pg birth thread on Show and Tell is an example of the exclusionary, cliqueish, privileged nature of the hyena community. IMO. I can't comment on the decisions/actions of mods or admins here, so I won't.
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#508 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 01:02 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by spatulagirl
AM, every single forum on this board is cliquish. Some are even exclusionary. I can give you a list but I am sure you know which ones I mean. To say that TAO doesn't have it's own "Old Girl's Club" makes me laugh. Half of them are posting on this thread.
That's great! I'm glad that people are starting to feel comfortable venturing out of diapering. Some other forums might be cliquish, but I have never seen or felt it to the same extent that I've seen or felt it on diapering.

Quote:
And the fluff between the meat? That is what makes it fun! Hell, lets get rid of all the fluff posts at MDC and ONLY allow people to talk about serious things the pertain only to NFL as defined by the great PeggyO. No heartwarming threads about cute things your baby does while nursing. No "Increase your posts" threads.
You're right, it is fun. It's a lot of fun. But it was getting very, very difficult to find any real information about cloth diapering in the cloth diapering forum. I don't think anyone is saying to get rid of the fluff, or the stash pictures. It's a question (for me anyway) of easier navigation.

Quote:
But it wasn't. Pynki (I think) posted a thread in Q&A saying that frugal diapering and hyena diapering needs to be seperated. That we were out of control and she didn't like it. And a few others jumped in. I think more people were against it than for it. But the Mods said, you are right. Frugal diapering and hyenas need to be seperated. We are working on it.
I guess everyone sees it through their own lens. It is what it is, and I don't think it's going to change. Personally, I hope it doesn't go back to how it was before. I guess I just don't understand the level of energy being spent on complaining about it though. I mean, I know why I'm participating in this thread- I don't want the board to go back to how it was. But do you (collective you) really think that starting a thread every other day about how much the new organization sucks is going to get it to change back?

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#509 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 01:03 PM
 
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You know, spatula, when you make comments about how you think the "PTB don't give a rat's ass about diaperers" or sarcastically call the founder of Mothering "the great Peggy O," I do kind of wonder about your motivation for staying here. You only want mdc if it allows free rein to the hyenas to define the space?

I think if CM and Peggy want to make Diapering more welcoming to people with a lower diaper budget, they are within their rights, as owners and admin, to do so. Trying to work out whether it is to segregate the hyena posts, or to create organization, is futile, IMO. By segregating hyena posts, it creates the organization.
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#510 of 644 Old 12-16-2005, 01:06 PM
 
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Originally Posted by lovebug
i said suppoet eachother and get over it not just GET OVER IT I DONT CARE WHAT YOU SAID WAS WRONG NO MATTER WHAT!!!!!! YOU DONT KNOW ME fyi the get over it was not ment to be mean you are one of the only moms that took it that way and the other who did we worked it out! and no it was not a legitmate question! it was mean and wrong!!!!!! YOU WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO TTC? be thankful you can have kids and dont EVER act like that again it makes you look bad!!!!!!
How do you even know she's not ttc? I have a child, but I've been ttc for over a year now. And stop with the caps and the extra exclamation points, it's kind of bumming me out.

Mom to Dakota (6), Coy, (4), Max, (4), Lily (4), and Auri (June 19th 2010)!
Visit Lily's site at www.caringbridge.org/visit/lilymathis1
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