does anyone else get called a hippy because of their choice to homebirth? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 51 Old 07-10-2010, 07:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm just curious because i get called this everytime anyone finds out i had a homebirth and intend to do it again this pregnancy, honestly i find it kind of annoying.

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#2 of 51 Old 07-10-2010, 07:55 PM
 
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Where do you live? That is really rude actually. I was called one of "those crazy women" once and basically told the offending woman that I wasn't crazy. I just felt more comfortable at home with a midwife than I would have been in a hospital because all of the interventions and that having a natural birth isn't as bad as everyone likes to paint it out to be. It can be a beautiful experience. I also told her that her decision to have her babies in hospital with drugs was her choice and what she was comfortable with. I just did what was right for me and my family. I think she stopped after that because I wasn't indignant or upset about it. I simply stated my opinion on the matter logically and calmly, told my birth story and added that I was very happy with what I accomplished. So I can understand how it gets upsetting that someone will criticize your choice, but at the end of the day, it's your choice. Maybe these ladies are upset that they didn't have the bollocks to do it that way and want to make you feel bad for your decision.

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#3 of 51 Old 07-10-2010, 08:00 PM
 
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I get called a hippie for lots of things- not shaving my legs, using mama cloth, not using deodorant. (mostly from my family)

Usually when the term homebirth comes up, I get "brave" or "crazy."

I'd take hippie over crazy.

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#4 of 51 Old 07-10-2010, 08:13 PM
 
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Banana - me too... I'm hippie for not shaving (anywhere), not using deo, cloth diapering, making my own nut milks... not vaxing, the list goes on...

I get brave, crazy, uneducated and naive when I mention homebirth. When I mention I'm HBA2Cing, I get stupid, irresponsible and unfit.

Ignore 'em! Or embrace your 'hippie' self LOL.
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#5 of 51 Old 07-10-2010, 08:33 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I live in las vegas , i either get oh you are such a hippy and or a long spiel about why their circumstances would make a homebirthand or a vbac impossible , it's weird i really don't expect everyone to do things my way that is just what is right for my family. i just don't get why my choices result in judgements or people feeling the need to defend their ones births.


No one knows about my choices regarding vaccinations or i am sure i would get called a hippy for that as well.

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#6 of 51 Old 07-10-2010, 08:34 PM - Thread Starter
 
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i guess your are right hippy is better than crazy

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#7 of 51 Old 07-10-2010, 09:53 PM
 
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I live in VT and so I don't get alot of very negative commentary. The "worst" I've ever gotten is that I'm "brave" which is a bit passive aggressive.

However, my MIL is from Oklahoma and when we told her we were using a midwife for our hospital birth (with baby #2) she asked, "....like the Amish??" LMAO! She doesn't know yet that this baby will be born at home. I wonder what in the world she'll think of that.
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#8 of 51 Old 07-11-2010, 02:18 AM
 
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Of course they say I'm a hippie for having a HB but I take it as a compliment! I'd love to be a hippie but I'm not quite there yet...

Hippies are awesome!

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#9 of 51 Old 07-11-2010, 12:40 PM
 
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I don't get called hippie or crazy. Maybe because I am older and look, I dunno, pretty mainstream. Mostly I get the startled look, or the "wow, I'd never be able to do that" or "Wow, I wish I could have done that" comments.

Now Dh does think I'm nutso because I am becoming more crunchy as time passes, while he turns into Rush Limbaugh...
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#10 of 51 Old 07-11-2010, 12:52 PM
 
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sattygirl99 - I hear that!

I am always hearing "You are so brave!" Seriously?

I dig the hippy comment.

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#11 of 51 Old 07-11-2010, 06:13 PM
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I believe we were called "hippy new age freaks" once years ago because we homebirth, cloth diaper and in general do the atachment parenting thing. I just ignored them. I'm comfortable with my birthing/parenting choices. I can only asume that this person wasn't as thrilled with her choices since she felt the need to put down me and DH.

 
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#12 of 51 Old 07-11-2010, 06:23 PM
 
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I get/got hippie as well. I never understand why that is the prevalent comment when people hear about 'natural' choices-I mean, people were doing it long before the hippies.

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#13 of 51 Old 07-11-2010, 06:24 PM
 
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I was once called "one of those natural women" by another woman when she learned I was planning a homebirth.

This just made me and dh giggle, and sing lots of Aretha!

Trying to get my bearings...
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#14 of 51 Old 07-11-2010, 06:25 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Ellie'sMom View Post
I was once called "one of those natural women" by another woman when she learned I was planning a homebirth.

This just made me and dh giggle, and sing lots of Aretha!
as opposed to those unnatural women, lol!

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#15 of 51 Old 07-11-2010, 08:45 PM
 
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Most people think that I am way out in left field for doing this. Being called a hippie would be nice. Almost a compliment. Most of them thought I was nuts when I started stopping the HFCS and hydrogenated stuff at the door.
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#16 of 51 Old 07-12-2010, 02:48 PM
 
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I don't see hippie as being a derogatory term at all, but I do resent any implication that my decision to homebirth was based on any sort of "lifestyle".

That's because my decision was based on science and evidence!!! For a low-risk woman like me, evidence has shown that HB was my best chance of having a healthy birth and avoiding injury to myself or my baby. Until US hospitals insitute evidence-based practices in their maternity wards, its just logical to avoid them unless you have risk factors making them safer places than home to birth in. Unless of course you want to give birth in the hospital (e.g., b/c you want pain meds), in which case you should go where you feel comfortable.
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#17 of 51 Old 07-12-2010, 03:03 PM
 
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I get called a hippie for a lot of the choices I make. But generally I get it from my close group of friends who have known me for years and throw it around as more of a compliment. It's not really seen as a bad thing, at least not where I am. People may not think exactly like me, or make the exact same decision as I do, but for the most part it seems like they're excepting and curious about my choices. It's not all that I am, and I'm not crazy about labels in general, but this is one that I'm not going to waist time getting upset about. Love the hippie in you.

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#18 of 51 Old 07-12-2010, 03:05 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Banana731 View Post
when the term homebirth comes up, I get "brave" or "crazy."
Yep, that.
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#19 of 51 Old 07-12-2010, 03:29 PM
 
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I have not gotten hippie. My DH has, but that's based on everything we do (or don't do) not on our homebirth. I've gotten crunchy and from another time, but again not based on our homebirth. I actually haven't told too many people we are doing a homebirth, because I'm just not sure on the reactions.

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#20 of 51 Old 07-12-2010, 03:34 PM
 
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In context with other crunchy habits I have, yes, hippy gets thrown out in reference to my homebirthing practices. It doesn't bother me a bit.

People have said far ruder things.

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#21 of 51 Old 07-12-2010, 09:12 PM
 
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In context with other crunchy habits I have, yes, hippy gets thrown out in reference to my homebirthing practices. It doesn't bother me a bit.

People have said far ruder things.


Most of the time people comment on how "brave" or "crazy" I am for birthing in an environment where an epidural isn't available.

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#22 of 51 Old 07-12-2010, 09:44 PM
 
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I don't take issue with "hippy." I take issue with "selfish," as in I'm a selfish woman because I care about a luxurious, spa-like birthing experience more than I care about my baby's life. Bull$%#$%#. That's a line thrown out by the anti-homebirth community because they don't want to know or admit to the real reason we birth at home--to avoid anti-evidence hospital practices. It's out of concern for me AND my baby that I birth at home.

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#23 of 51 Old 07-13-2010, 09:25 AM
 
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Not yet. I announced my intentions on facebook yesterday and got 10 likes, one doula recommendation and 2 "I wish I could too."

But most of my friends are fairly crunchy, and my family knows better than to make too much noise!

The most 'offensive' comment was from my cousin, who I am not close with. "Interesting". What on earth does that mean?

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#24 of 51 Old 07-14-2010, 11:47 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Banana731 View Post
Usually when the term homebirth comes up, I get "brave" or "crazy."
This, so far in the two months since my hb. One of my husband's aunts left a voicemail for us w/congrats on the birth, and she paused in it, very obviously looking for a word other than "crazy," before using "brave." When people don't get it, they use these words. We just laugh about it.

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#25 of 51 Old 07-15-2010, 10:33 PM
 
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I call myself a hippy! I think I probably do it as a defense since I KNOW what people are thinking when they hear about certain things that I do. It goes kinda like this...

"Where are you giving birth?"

"OH, Im planning to have a homebirth"

Stunned, sometimes disgusted look...

"Yeah, I know, Its the hippy in me!"

Lol. I play it off so people know I realize they are not going to agree with me and they dont have to, I am me and will do what I feel is right!

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#26 of 51 Old 07-16-2010, 09:22 AM
 
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I have gotten "Oh, so you are one of those" a couple of times. And more recently several people have said to me "I don't need to be a hero" when telling me they are giving birth in a hospital.
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#27 of 51 Old 07-17-2010, 11:48 AM
 
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I'm not often called a "hippie", but "crunchy". I can't bear being called crunchy. It crawls right under my skin. It's generally by well-meaning people, though. I gratefully haven't received negativity in regards to homebirth.

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#28 of 51 Old 07-17-2010, 06:32 PM
 
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Lol, yup. I'm also a hippie for cloth diapering, extended breastfeeding, baby wearing and basically anything AP-ish. It's kind of annoying because I'm not a hippie really but I usually just laugh it off.

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#29 of 51 Old 07-17-2010, 07:00 PM
 
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The people in my life have a really low hippy-tolerance. I got called a hippy when I put up a clothesline and got a composting bin. Not in a mean or insulting way, though. I also get teased whenever I show up for playgroup with a styrofoam cup of coffee. I'm slightly on the hippy side of my group of friends, I guess.
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#30 of 51 Old 07-21-2010, 02:20 PM
 
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Hippy, brave, crazy, weird, old-fashioned, luddite, martyr, selfish, stubborn...I've been called lots of things for my birthing and mothering choices. They don't bother me in the slightest anymore. Nowadays, given how unnatural I find most modern parenting choices to be, I take it as a compliment.

I believe Mark Twain said it best: "Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect."


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