Wondering what everyones experience is with having the older sibling at a homebirth. DD will be a little over 3. So what are your suggestions on finding someone to watch a LO? (My mom is an option, but I dont think I want her at my birth)
I was thinking of contacting a midwifery school in the area to see if a student would like to help. Ideally, a volunteer would be great, but realistically, if I dont find any volunteers, how much would you pay someone to watch a child during a birth?
I acted as a sibiling doula recently. I was paid $300, granted that was in my comfort zone of payment. Not sure what others might charg ein your area.
Obviously, I would start with a friend/co-worker/church member that I trust and that I don't think would drive me crazy to be at my birth. I feel you on the mom thing. I don't really want my mom here either. I think this time, I will have my little sister here, since I should have the baby while she's on break from school, and possibly my step mom and def my MIL. My cousin lives in FL and will be here for Christmas and if she is still here when I have the babe she is going to do labor photos.
I'm trying to figure this out myself. My only two options are really my MIL and my good friend as they are the only people that live close enough that my daughter is comfotable with and that I would feel comfortable being there.
We're sending the kids to a friends house. They are 4 1/2 and 18 Months. Although I think it would be an awesome experience for them to be there for the birth, I can't handle the distraction and the extra person/people in my house to help with them. I considered it for my entire pregnancy and now realize that is my preference. I love my kids, but I need them to go away so I can concentrate and relax and the focus is all on me, not getting a sippy cup, or wiping a butt or making lunch or dinner, or breaking up a squabble or putting on Spongebob....
This pregnancy has been very very difficult on me, and being pregnant while being the SAHM of 2 small children has been SO difficult. We don't have parents that can pitch in or aunts or uncles so it's been all on me and then DH helps when he isn't at work. I NEED a break and a SILENT BIRTH!
We have a few people in mind to send the kids to, just in case. The main ones have 4 kids of their own, and if any of them are sick that will be a no go cuz I can't have my kids returning to me and the new baby with germs and sickies. Then we have a couple who are like surrogate grandparents and they have a Teen Daughter who helps us out sometimes, but of course they work so they might not be able to help. Then we have a couple our age with no children, but she is still recovering from a surgery a few weeks ago and not 100%. I was hoping whoever took the kids could keep them at LEAST 2 days, (Same amount of recovery you usually get in the hospital...) But I just don't know. I feel like cuz I am having a homebirth, the helpers will think that I am "Home now and all better"...I NEED TO RECOVER. I NEEEEEED MY BREAK! I NEED TO ADJUST!!!
I hear all you ladies!! On the one hand i've heard kids do great at births, on the other, maybe i just want privacy?? i'll ask my MW on my next appointment. i've been bringing DD with me so she gets a sense of her personality n such. I think i may keep DD around if she's playing in her room or downstairs or even outside.
Good news tho (in case anyone wanted to know) I thought of a friend and her hubby who said they'd love watching/babysitting during the birth (of course, her hubby is only allowed in our "birthing room" when i'm decent) so i'm hoping this will be a go!