Which birth option would you choose? - Mothering Forums

View Poll Results: Where should I give birth?
Parent's home (where I'm currently living) 8 72.73%
Friend's home 0 0%
Short term rental 3 27.27%
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#1 of 6 Old 06-30-2011, 08:18 PM - Thread Starter
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I feel like I am not in the most ideal birthing situation, but it could be worse :)


I will be giving birth in January in a pretty snowy climate.  I have had two homebirths which went well and were pretty quick (ds1- four hours active labor, ds2- two hours of active labor).


We have recently moved back to this area from out of the country and won't have our own home in time for the birth.  We are currently staying with my parents. 


So, here are my three choices:


1) Birth here at my parent's home where I'm staying.  My parents seem fine with it (in fact mom is excited) and would totally stay hidden in their bedroom if I asked.  It would also be easy for them to take care of our two boys if needed.  Downside....we live a 30 minute drive from the nearest hospital.  We live out in the country and, while it is plowed pretty regularly, the roads are not always perfect for driving if there has just been a big snow or lots of drifting.  However, there could be snow or not- it just all depends on timing.  My Dad does have a four wheel drive truck, which could be helpful if the midwife can't get in from the highway or something.


2) Bith at my friend's house up in town, which would be a 25 minute drive for us.  Obviously this would be close to a hospital.  She would let us use her basement which is finished and we could have as much privacy as we liked.  She also does homebirths and is very supportive.  Obviously, it would be massively annoying to leave home and have to drive there while in labor.  Not to mention coming back home the next day.


3) Rent some sort of short term rental apartment up in town for the months of December and January and live and give birth there.  Move back to my parents in February.  This choice is obviously the most expensive and also moving to and from there would be bothersome. 



I don't think any choice is the perfect choice, but I'd love to hear some opinions! 

Jessica, wife to Mark, homeschooling mama to Micah (2006), Noah (2009), Owen (2012) and another on the way this August (20014)
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#2 of 6 Old 07-01-2011, 10:35 AM
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If I had to make this decision, I'd say that your parents' home should be "Plan A" with your friends' house being "Plan B" in case of bad weather. 


Birthing in your own space, where you are living and settled and comfortable, and WITH built-in childcare that you don't have to call to come help?  Definitely the best option.  However, if the drive/distance to the hospital in bad weather is a concern (it would be for me), you can always have a foul-weather plan for your friend's basement. 


If the weather is ok when you go into labor, then great, labor and birth where you are, knowing that you can get to the hospital in a fairly short time (or an ambulance could get to you).*


If the weather is looking scary when you go into labor, throw your birth supplies in the car and head to your friend's house.  If you head there in early labor, it shouldn't be a difficult car ride for you, you can take your time on the roads, and you'll have plenty of time to get settled and relaxed in that space before the hard work of birthing begins.  I think I'd be able to relax into my labor much more easily if I wasn't dealing with nagging fear about how an ambulance could get through the snow to my house, were it to become necessary for me or the baby.  You could have an overnight bag packed just for this purpose, with some birth-altary sorts of things to help you center and focus in a less-familiar space.  (An overnight bag is a good idea anyway, to have around in case of transfer.) 


Is your friend's house closer or further to the MW than your house? 


I would not, personally, mess around with a short-term rental.  That just seems like a ludicrous amount of money to spend for this purpose.  Of course, one of the reasons I prefer HB is because of the lower cost, so, that is important to me in my own decision-making.



(* Half an hour's drive is reasonable, IMO, unless you're in a really precipitously dangerous situation, and if that's the case, it probably doesn't matter how close the hospital is; any distance is probably too far.  Fortunately, those situations are extremely rare.  For nearly any trouble you'll encounter in labor, 30 minutes is a reasonable amount of time to get to a hospital.  Plus, if you're really in trouble you're likely to be traveling by ambulance, which can go rather more quickly. )

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#3 of 6 Old 07-01-2011, 12:56 PM
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I would worry about being so far out of town because that means you're a far away from the midwife, and with how short your last was I would worry that it would end up an accidental UC (my son was born 40 minutes after the midwife arrived, and I was only a 20 minute drive away from them), especially if you happen to go into labor in the middle of a snowstorm. I personally don't think I would do a two month rental because the short term rentals are OMG expensive, you could spend the same amount on a 6-month lease at one of the less-expensive apartment complexes and be settled a bit in advance (move in oct or early nov when we won't have snow on the ground yet). my second choice would be to just stay where you are, but in that case you and your DH would need to be prepared in case of accidental UC. 

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#4 of 6 Old 07-01-2011, 05:54 PM
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Originally Posted by Comtessa View Post

If I had to make this decision, I'd say that your parents' home should be "Plan A" with your friends' house being "Plan B" in case of bad weather. 


I totally agree with Comtessa.  This would be my choice too.

Catholic wife to S and mama to my two loveys V dd1 10/04 and G dd2 11/10 - #3 due in August 2013.  Here we go again.  homebirth.jpgwinner.jpg selectivevax.gifcd.gif

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#5 of 6 Old 07-01-2011, 06:52 PM
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Does your MW carry pitocin and oxygen? That's a big reassurance for immediate response stuff. I think 30 minutes transfer would be ok for most situations though a few rare ones would need c/s asap of course. Any bad weather or mild concerns about the labor and I'd say go to your friend's house quickly. Either way with that history you should call the MW early and prepare just in case for UC. What are you comfy with?

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#6 of 6 Old 07-02-2011, 08:24 AM - Thread Starter
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Thanks everyone.  My midwife does carry oxygen and pitocin and even some sort of gadget that gives concentrated oxygen if it's a really bad case.  I asked my mom about how big emergencies are handled out here.  She said an EMT would come here first and then decide if you needed an ambulance or helicopter.  I'm thinking all of that could take quite a while?  I'm not sure how to find out more about it or who I would call about that.  Of course, I'm not really expecting an emergency, but I guess I feel like I should just be responsible about this and think through our options. 


My midwife does live a little ways from us.  We are south of town and she is north of town.  I'd say it would take her between 1 or 2 hours to get here (I'd have to check with her).  I think I will have to call her right away just in case this birth is even faster.  I agree about being prepared for an unassisted just in case.  That would be crazy!

Jessica, wife to Mark, homeschooling mama to Micah (2006), Noah (2009), Owen (2012) and another on the way this August (20014)
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