Any midwives here?? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 5 Old 09-09-2012, 02:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Can any of you who are midwives tell me why you chose to have or not have another midwife present at your home birth? This is a hot topic in our house right now and I would love to know what circumstances made you make the decision that you did.


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#2 of 5 Old 09-09-2012, 06:24 PM
 
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I would personally not feel comfortable birthing without 2 midwives or a midwife and a good assistant present. Even though I could probably monitor my baby and blood loss myself, I would not want to be in that head space during labor/postpartum. Furthermore, there are certain complications that the birthing woman would have a difficult time addressing without someone knowledgeable on hand, like a shoulder dystocia that did not resolve with maternal position change, a manual placenta removal, or a baby needing to be resuscitated at the same time bleeding needed to be controlled in the mother.

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#3 of 5 Old 09-12-2012, 04:50 PM
 
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Even though I am a midwife, I want to be the mommy during my own birth!  I think that's especially important for those of us who are always caring for someone else!  There are just times when we need to be cared for, to have another trusted provider watch for everything and have our backs!  Plus:  There is nothing quite as wonderful as sharing a birth with a peer midwife!  smile.gif
 


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#4 of 5 Old 09-16-2012, 07:27 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lost idwife View Post
  Plus:  There is nothing quite as wonderful as sharing a birth with a peer midwife!  smile.gif

 

Interesting. I have never wanted anyone that I know (besides DH) at my births. The thought of having a friend or family member there has always made me shudder. I guess with attendants who were strangers I knew I would never see them again and didn't give a crap what they thought of me, my body, my birth etc. and I never needed to worry about hurting their feelings. shrug.gif One of my best friends is a natural birth minded L&D nurse and an awesome photographer and there is no way I could imagine having her at my birth...I wonder what that says about me? Private to an extreme I suppose? winky.gif

 

Thank you ladies for your perspective. I had posted this somewhere else too and only had a couple MW's that said they prefer to UC. Everyone had various reasons for why they choose what they choose and how many (or few) attendants they prefer.


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#5 of 5 Old 09-19-2012, 08:02 PM
 
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With my first home birth i had the midwife that worked with me attend, i caught my own baby and labored on my own. Dh and the mw would check on me from time to time or listen to baby, get me a drink but pretty much i was alone.. Fast forward 4years and i have moved away from where i lived and my midwife partner would be willing to come but I felt like i DID it all and did it alone...so no need for a midwife. What I found out, that i completely underestimated what a buffer my friend/midwife was, she had a similar skill set and mind set, so if i needed something done... Like heart tones or getting the chux, she would probably have already did it without being told or asking... Or it would have just taken a word for her to understand what i wanted for the most part...
So instead i went through a birth where I scared my self and had a much more uncomfortable experience than i really needed to have, and if everything had not ended up as fine as it did I would still be freaked out and in some level of greif even now, because that baby is 24 yo and I still can fell that empty drop in me when I thought he was dead... Just for A minute or two but oh so horrible ... My best suggestion is to find a friend midwife a comadre who understands what you like and what you want, show her videos of the births you like and talk about it communicate... You want to be left alone you dont want fiddling with your cervix,you dont want to be marshalled around dont rub the baby up so hard.dont suction, dont put a hat on, dont tell me the apgar score dont talk loud.. What ever it is that you dont like talk about it ....and talk about it some more....
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