Feel a pull toward homebirth, but can't decide :( - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 9 Old 12-07-2012, 07:09 PM - Thread Starter
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I want to make this decision with solid resolve! Why am I hesitant? Mostly finances...I feel like I'm being high maintenence by choosing to spend thousands on a home birth vs. insurance covering 100% of my hospital birth. My husband will work his tail off for a month for me to have a home birth experience.


That's not the only reason, but it does matter to me. I never spend money, and am all about being very careful with what we do have. This will put a strain on finances, for sure...and it's scary to do that at the point we're at in our lives. New business, I'm not done with school yet...


Also, I don't know for sure if we'll be living in this house when it comes time to birth. We are looking to move within the next year, and if the right house pops up, we'll probably go for it. How do I plan my birth if I don't even know where I'll be? I suppose the tradeoff is I know exactly where I'm birthing at the hospital, but no idea who my birthing team will be. This way, I may not know the exact where, but will know the whos - which is ultimately most important, right?


I had two beautiful hospital births. The only, only, only regret I have is not being able to videotape one of them due to doctor's preference/liability. I can nitpick the experiences for things I'd want differently, but overall, I have nothing to complain about. My next experience will likely be very similar.


I feel neutral enough, but an emotional pull toward homebirth - especially the difference in quality of care I'll receive. I had a consultation with a midwife I've never met before today and she gave me more care than I feel I've received over the past 6 months at the clinic I go to.


I'm just entering my second trimester, so I have a bit of time, I know - but I want the higher level of care asap. I just need help understanding that this is going to be right for me and I won't regret it. Maybe this isn't the right place for this - but I'm putting my feelers out there, trying to gather all the info and insight that I can. I feel alone and a little scared, to be honest.

Wife to the sweetest man in the world and Mama to 2 precious boys (7 and 9), and one little miracle girl (born June '13)

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#2 of 9 Old 12-07-2012, 08:46 PM
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we will be spending more than 10% of our yearly income so that I can have a homebirth. I had a perfectly natural/mostly hands off hospital birth with my first, i actually call it a homebirth away from home, but I don't want to drive an hour plus to get to the hospital. I've wanted a homebirth since before I was pregnant with my daughter. In the end, my comfort and my desire to homebirth was more important to me than buying whatever the money would let us buy. 


Mama to  Hadley (2/10) energy.gif& Sawyer (1/13) babyboy.gif familybed1.gif


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#3 of 9 Old 12-07-2012, 08:51 PM
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My homebirth was one of the best, most empowering and amazing experiences of my life. (7 hospital births)..nothing will ever compare. We got a reduced rate and my midwife let me make payments, big help! Worth every penny!
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#4 of 9 Old 12-07-2012, 11:14 PM
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Do you live close to a birthing center at all? That might be a good middle ground and a lot of insurances will cover birth at a birthing center. Just a thought. Either way I try to make important decisions by taking a look at how it would change my life...when you look back on your life are you going to think about how much of a struggle it was to pay for your home birth or are you going to think about how awesome it was to have that experience? If you think you will be climbing into a hole that you won't be able to climb out of and it will drastically change your life for the worse I would say stick to a hospital or birth center birth. If things will be tough for a little bit but you will make it through you will probably be very glad you bit the bullet and went with the home birth.

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#5 of 9 Old 12-07-2012, 11:22 PM
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I'm *finally* getting my homebirth with my third baby. My situation is different, because insurance covers it, but if it didn't I would be inclined to say I'd pay for it out-of-pocket. I had one wonderful hospital birth and another not so great one.


Have you actually spoken with a midwife? Maybe there are payment plans or alternate pay arrangements available.

Jean, feminist mama raising three boys: W (7), E (5) and L (2.15.13)

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#6 of 9 Old 12-08-2012, 01:30 AM
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we have home birth rooms at our local public hospital ,(Australia ) they even have spa baths.

just make sure that you get all of your prenatal checks

have an experienced hospital midwife involved (not just any midwife, get an experienced one who has worked in a hospital and seen complications and knows what to do) I have heard of some home birth midwives getting overwhelmed and just dumping their home birthing mother at the hospital entrance. and some take too long to act.

if things aren't going right don't delay going to hospital
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#7 of 9 Old 12-08-2012, 04:05 AM
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I tried to home birth with my first and transferred. Paying for two birthing experiences was really brutal. With my second I successfully had a home birth. It err wasn't quite all I was hoping it would be. I almost died.

If you can afford it without hardship or if you have mental issues about being in a hospital I think it is a great option. If it is going to be hard to pay for and if you have had positive hospital experiences, I would consider how you will feel about this decision in five or ten years? Are you going to regret not trying? Even though my second birth was complicated I'm glad I stayed home. I'm very ok with the first transfer. Why do you want a home birth?

My advice may not be appropriate for you. That's ok. You are just fine how you are and I am the right kind of me.

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#8 of 9 Old 12-08-2012, 04:53 AM
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It must be less expensive for insurance companies to cover midwives and home birth over hospital births.... I wonder why they won't cover it? I am so grateful for our Canadian system (not without its issues but I digress) as I was given full reign to decide on hospital birth with doctors, hospital birth with midwife or home birth and any one of those are fully covered.

Home birth seems a big miss on insurance coverage to me....
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#9 of 9 Old 12-08-2012, 07:20 AM
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Talk to your insurance co and see. I know a lot do cover them since the cost to them is the global midwife care (same as a hospital midwife - the hospital part).


It is not like you are doing this every month. How many births are you going to have in your lifetime? Make it count

Mama to J (Jan '09), E (May '11), and C (August, '13)

Professional Cloth Diaper at Diaper Lab in Boston (ask me about laundry)
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