How did you feel? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 7 Old 01-15-2015, 02:53 PM - Thread Starter
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How did you feel?

Hi everyone,

I will be a first time Mom and really want a natural birth. I've been asking people who have already given birth about labor and delivery, but I still have questions and don't know what to expect. I was wondering if anyone could share their experience - I have a specific question. Is it possible to communicate with others who are present in the room during the hardest part of labor? I've heard from some people that they were unable to talk to anyone, and it makes me worried that I won't be able to express my needs, etc. My Mom said she was in a state of shock from pain during the late stages of labor and did not know "where she was".
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#2 of 7 Old 01-16-2015, 05:41 PM
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I've had an all natural labor, and it was very possible for me to communicate with others in the room during every stage (even the crowning!) of labor.

Stay at Home, Breastfeeding, Co-Sleeping, Homeschooling, Baby-Wearing Mama.

DS1 11/16/10 DS2 12/10/11 DS3 01/04/14

Expecting 07/01/15!

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#3 of 7 Old 01-16-2015, 07:00 PM
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totally possible

And all the better to be at home where those around you are more likely to be in tune with you and your desires/needs and
less likely to be pushing their own ideas on you during labor.

For me, it was intense, but easier in some ways than I'd.anticipated. Hope you have a great experience and healthy baby!
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oops. eta: sorry! You didn't.say home birth, you said natural. Mine was both, obvously, I guess Part of.why I wanted.a hb though, was so that no one could offer me pain relieving drugs!
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#4 of 7 Old 01-17-2015, 12:05 PM
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absolutely communication was possible. my first was planned to be a homebirth but we had to transfer in labor. i had pitocin in the hosp, and really that was the only time things felt somewhat out of control (ctx one on top of the next, and people more interested in the machines surrounding me, than me, the person right there in the middle of the room). i was still able to communicate though and easily refuse other meds and an episiotomy.

my next was at home, and born in water. it was far easier to communicate in that situation. i wasn't into talking DURING ctx, but there's time between each and every one where i could talk or be spoken to without any problem. i talked, joked, and laughed the whole time. during transition, i had "i can't" moments with both kids, and i remember asking my DH with dd2, "can i do this?" he laughed and said, "you already are. you're almost done!" that was as tough as it got. but remembering, the moment you think you can't do it, you're about to be done! that has been helpful for me both times, and i expect it to be helpful this time too.

Happy Humanist Mom to Luna Paz (2/16/06) & Zoe Jean (7/21/08). Patiently awaiting the arrival of Johnny (edd 6/26/15).
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#5 of 7 Old 01-18-2015, 07:53 PM
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Between contractions I could usually communicate fine, though in transition whatever I said was probably rather obscured while I was overwhelmed for a while. In my longest birth (first baby and it went way longer than normal) I got very out of it when I got overtired, and I was half asleep, delusional and miserable for a little while then. I think in a rougher birth the factors sort of compound: exhaustion, discomfort, tension, and lack of control might all pile up. Ease some of those factors and it makes it all easier: get your support people and care providers on board with your wishes, have them keep the setting calm and positive, pace yourself and eat drink and rest as you can, and find positions of comfort.

Hopefully they can anticipate your needs. Teach your support people to physically offer a cup of water or apple juice (and maybe even snacks) sort of constantly as your #1 need from them will likely be a lot of hydration and energy. If you're in a hospital that says ice chips only have your husband sneak you something better. Also if you'll want to get into a bath or shower your support person should offer to help you to it, also to help you change positions otherwise, to fetch you pillows, socks or clothing, use counterpressure on your back etc.
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#6 of 7 Old 01-19-2015, 01:14 PM
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I had no problem communicating between contractions. During them, I wanted to be focused inward and basically told anyone to shut up for a minute Even during (intense, 10 mins) pushing, I was totally coherent, talking to DP and midwife, touching my son's head, etc.

Karla (25), loving having and growing a family: my amazing DP, DS (2), DSD (7). Expecting my second early May and so excited to
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#7 of 7 Old Today, 04:38 PM
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Same as the PP, I could communicate, but there were times when I didn't want to because it felt more comfortable to be in the zone.
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