Wow, nice to see this thread so active!!
And congratulations Sue and Silas!!
RE:lotus birth. We did one w/our second born, first freebirth. Chose not to this time though we had planned to. I think it's great and if your concern is mess and smell....well, there really isn't any in my experience. It is a bit of a logistical problem at times but I feel it's good for slowing down the special tranistion time. There is a rather long thread on the homebirth archives if you are interseted.
mamajaza--re: bleeding, etc. IMO, I think sometimes it *is* kind of a hangover from the MW"s., etc. I bled a lot w/all three births.....when I talked to JP Baker about it after my first birth, she said that the tendency when having someone at a birth is there, you tend to give them something to do. I also have heard (can't remember where) that hemorr. can be from the energy shift....everyone is focused on the mama then switch to the babe...
so the mama bleeds to get some attention back.So maybe following this, you may have still craved some attention from the MW's etc.? I know that I did and also felt betrayed by how I became a "customer" so quickly after they felt like friends to me, KWIM? though they were nice and all. I know that is not the exact situation you are describing but thought it might be helpful in figuring out what your bleeding meant in your situation. Also, maybe just a cue to slow down? The births where I felt the best physically (exercised the most during preg, etc.) were the ones I bled the *least* after. I hope some of this helps....
Dancermom--the only book DH read was "emergency chlidbirth". That's the only one that I particularly would recommend for dhs. Though there are a lot more. Both my DH and I are big fans of jeannine parvati Baker but she usually appeals to a particular audience. Her sites are www.freestone.org
She sells articles too, as well as her books and has some articles on line.
Just an aside mamas, since there are not many people who would apreciate this...we are driving past JP Baker's place this summer and I have saved enough to buy my second hygieia lesson. SO I'm going to pick it up from her. I love seeing her and haven't seen her since I was preg. w/ds so she's not seen two of my babes. Anyway,k I'm so excited to work more w/her. Just had to share.
Laurata--my mom (a RN!!) was NOT happy at all about my UC"s. It was really tough and to behonest I am not sure there is really a way to "fix" the situation....most people wont' normally see your view/side anyway, not to mention when they are genuinely concerned about your welfare because they love you, KWIM? I think that can be even more paralyzing. I think the mnost you can do is get comfortable w/it and reassure them as best you can. My mother had a little outburst (not a confrontational person AT ALL BTW) while watching our third baby's birth video (our second freebirth). SHe got it out and listened to me too but really, I know while she probably has a little more faith in me as a result, she'll never really understand why I"M doing it. She was however really really great at my blessingway before the birth though so I know she really tries. Anyway, good luck. It IS a tough situation.
well mamas, that's the most I"ve been able to write for a while but Soleil is finally asleep....usually I just read and can't really type cuz she's a finger (mine!) sucker but I"m here lurking!! WIshing everyone the best....