hi all you amazing strong & free women!
i haven't posted too much on this thread, but have been following it voraciously. my dh and i plan to uc and just started ttc less than a week ago...but i think i may be a few days pg!!
: i'm not going to take a preg. test. i remember when blueviolet was writing that she may be pg, but wasn't taking a test. it was fun to follow. (i love all the like-mindedness that pops up on this thread) i want be to tuned in and find out gradually. i think that besides being a gentle transition, it can only help me have a better pregnancy and birth--you know, paying attention inside, instead of to measurements and tests and such. still, the reality after planning to ttc for soo long, for it to be possible so fast is
so, we're not sure if we're pregnant, but i had a weird rush of energy into my pelvic region and the next day, i had a day of nausea, my mind is soo loose, spacey and forgetful(i'm virgo and always have my sh** together), crazy short crying spells out of nowhere--i can even laugh at myself while i'm crying, tender breasts that i swear are already growing (though dh can't tell
) have had two nights of bizarro dreams that make no sense, and besides just feeling like i *must* be living with little soul attached to me, i started last night to have a little brown (like old blood) when i wiped. i never bleed off my cycle, it's always been really regular, so it got me to thinking.
even though i just did a search on mdc and read that the blood can be normal, i was driving a huge backhoe for a few hrs yesterday and that can be really bumpy and jerky, so i'm wondering if that's the culprit. i'm wondering if i should keep doing it, but we only have it rented for a couple more days, and it's such hard work, i can't really let my dh trash his body by doing it *all*...and i figure some women don't know for weeks or months, and do things they wouldn't do if they knew...i'm trying to find a rationale for getting the work done! what do you all think?
anyway, we won't know "for sure" for a couple weeks, but i wanted to chime in and let you all know what's up. i'll let you know when i can be added to the list for sure!
i have a couple friends that are midwives, so i should be able to get whatever documentation i need to *prove* that i was pregnant after the fact for birth cert.
as for telling anyone, before the birth, we only plan to tell a couple close friends that we know are in support of uc. i don't want to have arguments/discussions trying to convince anyone...at least at this point. my mom, well, i expect i'll tell her--she's always been supportive of my weird ways and knows i'm responsible when i need to be. my mil is a totally different can of worms (or snakes?
) altogether. my dh and i aren't even planning on telling his family we're pg for a few months at least, much less uc. he's close to his family, but they're so straight-laced and controlling. i won't let them control me and have no qualms about telling them where i'm at with some of their comments, but i try to bite my tongue for my dh's sake. watching me speak up for myself has triggered dh to try to advocate for himself and his life choices to his family, so i try to step back and let him have the chance, rather than speaking up for him. but his family is going to be the worst we have to deal with--at least it's a familiar struggle, that makes it alot easier! other than that, i don't know--it's all so new to even be faced with the choice of telling or not. i agree with you all that said you didn't want to tell anyone that would call cps or 911. afterwards, i may be more open, but then i think, "what about those that know now, when we get pregnant again?" any of you have thoughts on that?
oh, the other thing is i'm going to exaggerate the *due date*, or be vague. like, if we're pg now, i'll say--early summer. but again, if people find out we did that for this pg, will they bug us with the next one?
i've re-read through all the past uc support threads and have gotten some really great, wise ideas on how to explain it...or not explain it!
the way i feel, i must be either pg or have some huge systemic dis-ease
, it just feels like so much is going on inside...
already, i feel so blessed to have the benefit of all the wisdom you've all put into this thread. and i love the birth stories...ahhhh... can't wait for hathor's, klothos', mamajaza's and anyone else's beautiful gentle free births coming soon.
(i live outside of town, and have to come to town to use a computer, so i don't get to post too often--just fyi if my responses/comments are slow)
edited to fix: all my typo's and potentially hormone-induced unclear thoughts!