UC Thread #11 - November 2004 - Page 7 - Mothering Forums

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#181 of 204 Old 11-26-2004, 08:23 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi All!

Amy just called me and asked me to let you all know she had her baby boy, Owen, after a quick 5-hour labor and wonderful UC birth. Everything went great, Amy and Owen are both doing wonderfully, and she sounded strong, healthy, and happy

Mama, homeschooler, midwife. DD (13yo), DS (11yo), DD (8yo), DD (3yo), somebody new coming in November 2013.

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#182 of 204 Old 11-26-2004, 08:26 PM
 
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Yay, Amy!

Oh, I'm so happy to hear this! Hooray!
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#183 of 204 Old 11-26-2004, 09:46 PM
 
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Amy~ can't wait to hear of your amazing UC! Hope you are recovering wonderfully.
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#184 of 204 Old 11-26-2004, 10:26 PM
 
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Congratulations Amy! Enjoy your babymoon! Looking forward to reading your birth story!

Rachel ~ homeschooling mama to six.
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#185 of 204 Old 11-27-2004, 12:30 PM
 
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All right Amy! I can't wait to hear the story!
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#186 of 204 Old 11-28-2004, 07:06 PM
 
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Christina-
What A delightful birth story! Could you imagine it being any other way?
All my best
Amyjean

Mama to 5 babies. UCer, too!
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#187 of 204 Old 11-28-2004, 07:08 PM
 
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Congratulations Amy!
Happy Babymoon!

Amyjean

Mama to 5 babies. UCer, too!
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#188 of 204 Old 11-30-2004, 08:54 AM
 
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congrats Amy! can't wait to read your birth story!

Blissful Mama to DD-(5), DS-(6) and someone new due in November!
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#189 of 204 Old 11-30-2004, 10:38 AM
 
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Niki -- Thanks so much for letting us know!
Congratulations Amy!!!!!!!!!! I am so looking forward to your birth story. Enjoy your babymoon.

Jenniebug -- You are so sweet! Thanks for the invite on Dec 10th! Fridays are never good for me, though. Perhaps we can meet for your next appt. I'd love that.

I have a question for you wise ladies. I've been skimming Emergency Childbirth and reading parts of it to dh, but instead of making us feel better it's making us a bit more paranoid. I don't want to focus too much on the things that could go wrong, I'd rather focus on the things that could go right. I'm thinking if I'm a bit ignorant about some of the things that could go wrong, they won't manifest in my mind, IFYKWIM? I'm all for having the book on hand, but I certainly don't want to read it anymore. Has anyone else taken this approach?

Also, has anyone else NOT had a Plan B? I read in one of the UC books that sometimes having a plan B means you're not fully commiting to Plan A. I've never been a plan B person -- thinking if I have nothing to fall back on, I'll make sure I"ll succeed. Any thoughts on this?

Thanks in advance! I missed you ladies over Thanksgiving!

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#190 of 204 Old 11-30-2004, 12:05 PM
 
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kate-- to be honest, our "plan b" consisted of knowing how to get to the emergency room and knowing cpr... and being parents, that's the sort of thing you want to know anyway, right? :-)

our reasoning, though, is that we're not in the business of performing at-home obstetrics-- our intention is to perform the safe and natural bodily function of giving birth. if we ran into any trouble at home that we couldn't handle ourselves, it would more than likely require a hospital to fix anyway.

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#191 of 204 Old 11-30-2004, 12:56 PM
 
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Hi all I'm back It was a good trip but better to return home and I missed this board!

Blueviolet, To answer you from a while ago, I'm not sure why I thought badly about co-sleeping before I did it, I guess I just thought babies should sleep in their own beds and I thought if you co-slept you'd never get them to leave...which isn't totally inaccurate...lol. Our 8yo was in our bed this morning as was the 3yo. The 5yo joined us about 6am and at least one night a week we have a planned family night. While dh was in Iraq last year the kids rotated nights.

Now to go read the new birth story.

Stacey
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#192 of 204 Old 11-30-2004, 07:49 PM
 
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i just caught up on all the posts. whew! lots i've missed, it's good to be able to sit here long enough to catch up.
amyjeans~what a beautiful, strong birth story. as a first-time birther, it was good to read a detailed birth story. even though every birth is different, i hope that the more great uc stories i read the more i'll be able to integrate that how mine happens is ok and i can trust it. congratulations, mama!

can't wait to read the latest birth story (lefemmesdesfemmes, congrats!!) but i can only read one at a time. i like to digest them.

katest~ oh, your sil!! i have a similar situation with my sil. the worst comes when we're all at the il's house and dh & i have to lay in our bed at night listening to our nephew cio. i cry. maybe tell her that if it's so hard to do, maybe it's not right? i know it's hard to feel listened to without the 1st hand experience. i totally understand this phenomenon. and as for the emergency childbirth book (i think it was you that asked)...i'm not reading it. that's dh's job. i'm with you on not wanting all the intellectual information, don't want to manifest something. i figure that even if i read it, i might not remember the specifics of what i've read, that's dh's job; mine is to get my brain out of the way. i figure my following my intuition on what to do with my body is more valuable than anything in the book. i hear it's a really good book. i looked at one page and decided i wanted it's info available, but nowhere near my brain! i did read in it that the vaginal canal/space is a very elastic part of the body. that's one of the things i repeat to myself. "very elastic" i liked that.

dh and i visited sil/bil after telling them about the pg. we were in their town for a few days while i got some body work treatments (ahhhh). we feared they'd ask the "so, who's your midwife" type questions. none at all came through the whole visit, until we're standing up with our coats on...the last possible moment. dh and i aren't the greatest with words. so this being the first time we faced the question, we stuttered and stammered and laughed and finally ungracefully said our planned response-- that we've decided to not discuss our prenatal or birthing plans b/c we don't care to hear anyone's opinion or stories and are feeling very private about it all. bil went off talking loudly/forcefully about how we shouldn't give birth alone in the woods, (we live in the woods) and we don't have to go to an ob/gyn, but we shouldn't plan to do it alone. dh's family is sooo psychic/intuitive, but they don't use it respectfully, nor do they seem to know how intune they are, since they favor their mental judgement against their intuition. oh, so he wouldn't listen to me, dh, or sil. he just kept going. finally i just said i wasn't going to listen to it anymore and i was leaving and walked out. i don't even know if he noticed. he just seemed like he was talkingtalkingtalking, out of his body, entertaining himself and not paying attention to the rest of us. he ran out to the car afterwards and apologized and said he didn't realize i was so sensitive, even though that was part of our schpeel, that i'm sensitive to what others say and don't want to have to deal with getting stories and fearful things out of my head, that it's hard for me.

anyway, even though this looks like it was a bummer, it was good. it was only 2 family members saying it was stupid for us to not discuss it...at xmas there will be another bil and mil/fil (more opinionated). sil/bil probably will tell the story of what happened which will prep the rest of the family. we've now had one practice session, so we'll be much better prepared next time(s). etc etc. it was hard, but felt really productive and to our benefit.

someone asked about a "plan b". we have a hosp--the only one in many county area, just about 6 miles from our home. that's the extent of my plan b. i figure if it gets so far as to need a hosp, i'm in their hands. i mean, dh and i know about staying with the baby, insisting on only my nipple going into it's mouth, no vax/testing, etc, but we're (so far) not planning further than that. i also plan on having a phone list of people we can call during the birth if we need advice, to further avoid any "plan b" since we're 1st timers on all counts. but i don't plan on getting registered at the hosp. it might be denial or possibilities, it might be like katest. was talking about manifesting things, but dh and i have every confidence in our plan to freebirth. everytime the option comes up of having other plans, even a local back-up midwife, we're blocked--can't fathom needing anything other than what we're planning. it just feels right.

katest.~it was interesting to read that you're not going back to your mw for check-ups. i was under the impression that you were still going to see her some. i thought you were brave to go, b/c i get such a different mindset that i have to work at getting out of when i talk to my friends that are mw's, or that are seeing mw's. but i know everyone's different. i heard lots about how big i was and was i sure when i was due and am i having twins, etc, etc the whole time i was out of town. i'm so glad we're isolated for this 1st pg!

uhoh, i think this got really long...sorry!!

Waldorf homeschooling homesteading homebirthing mama to my 2 boys '05 & '10 joy.gif & most amazing wife to my most amazing dh
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#193 of 204 Old 11-30-2004, 11:46 PM
 
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It's a long one, but I needed a whole extra paragraph just to cover my placenta! :LOL Also, I wanted to respond to the question about the Emergency Childbirth book and Plan B stuff. My husband actually never read the book (he intended to, and did read Laura Shanley's book), but I did in my second trimester, and then put it away. I knew exactly where it was if we had needed to consult it, but I thought it was important to spend my whole third trimester really focusing on the positive. I never really had a plan B, except, as someone else said, knowing where the hospital was. Oh, and trusting myself to know in the moment if anything out of the ordinary that happened was something I could handle or not.

Anyway, here's my birth story! Thanks for reading!
***********************************

T(dh) came home for a late lunch on Friday, November 12th, and after R(dd—2 ½ yrs) fell asleep for her nap, we had sex. As was the case for the past month, I began having contractions after that were stronger than Braxton Hicks, but manageable and not what I’d call labor. They usually lasted a few hours and went away, but this time they continued throughout the afternoon and evening, staying the same in intensity. I was having a blessing way that evening, and chose not to tell my friends that I was experiencing contractions, but I began to think I would give birth by the end of the weekend.

After my blessing way ended, around 9:30 pm, I was standing talking to my mom when I felt a sudden wetness in my underwear. I excused myself, not knowing if it was my water breaking, and when I went to the bathroom, I realized it was my mucus plug. I also had some bloody show. I called to T to bring me new underwear because there were still several people in my house, and when he came he told me he had just thrown up from something he had eaten while out with R. I can’t remember if I said anything to him, except that I was in labor. I remember thinking that he would just have to feel better whether he liked it or not. After he threw up a few more times, he was fine.

I came out of the bathroom as one of my friends was leaving. I was still trying to act normal, but the intensity of the contractions had picked up, and she could tell something was going on. She didn’t realize I was in labor, though, she just thought I was ready for everyone to leave and so she left quickly. I went back into the kitchen. My mom, E, and MC were still there, and I told them I was in labor. After another contraction, I said “I think you guys need to leave soon. No rush, but in the next twenty minutes or so.” They immediately began rushing around cleaning up. I started to need dark and quiet during contractions, which were speeding up in intensity and frequency rather quickly. I would go into the spare bedroom and get on my hands and knees or child’s pose on the bed and breathe through them. Then I got nauseous, so I went to the bathroom and threw up. I had a few contractions on my hand and knees on the bathroom floor. At one point, R came in, asking me what was going on. I had heard people explaining to her that the baby was coming soon, and so I just said “I need you to put your hand on my back and be quiet.” She put her hands gently on my back and just whispered “what” very softly over and over, not really expecting an answer. It was exactly what I needed.

After that I went back to the bedroom. I started humming through my contractions, and wanted people OUT of my house so I could make more noise and take my clothes off. My mom came in to say goodbye, but I was in the middle of a contraction and I think I said “Don’t come in. I love you. Go away.” T came in to check on me and I said, “Why are they still here? I want everyone GONE!” He told me they were working on it, but we had asked them to go get a few things for me for labor, and some saltines for T, who was feeling better but not a hundred percent.

I started opening my mouth and really vocalizing through the contractions. They were getting stronger and stronger and much closer together. I didn’t even care anymore that MC and E could hear me. I kept alternating between hands and knees and side lying positions. I couldn’t stay in one position for very long, which was so different from last time. I wanted to rest in between contractions, but they were so close together, I only had time to change position or rest, not both. Finally, MC and E left, and T and R came in to be with me. The first thing I said was “Get these pants off of me!” I wanted to be naked (another change from my last labor). T and R would bring me water when I asked, but there was nothing I really wanted them to do. At one point, I asked T to put his hands on my lower back. I was feeling the contractions in my lower abdomen, reaching around to the back of my pelvis. But when T climbed on the bed, the movement was unbearable so I told him to get off. A little bit later, T asked me to tell him when I hit transition. I yelled, “There’s not going to be a transition!” Things were pretty intense at this point.

I was starting to feel pushy, but also needed to poop. I reached down to see if I could feel a head, and there was nothing in the birth canal, so I figured I had time to get to the bathroom. I asked T to help me stand up. As soon as I stood I could feel my body bearing down. I started to poop, so I yelled “Get the poop! Get the poop!” T sort of knocked it out of the way, and then I yelled, “The head!” and squatted down. By the time I squatted the head was about a third of the way out and I could feel the “ring of fire.” I also felt like I might have a small tear near the top of my canal. I started saying “Gentle, Chickpea” (our in-utero name for the baby) over and over while stroking the head and waiting for the next contraction. T was next to me, and R was crouched in front of me watching the baby’s head. Pushing didn’t feel as good this time as it had with R, but with the next contraction, the rest of the head came out, and then almost immediately, the body. I caught the baby as it came out, and I saw fluid gush out of the nose and mouth and right away. The baby began to cry right away, and so I offered my breast. The baby latched on pretty quick, and nursed almost constantly for the next three hours.

I looked right away to see if it was a boy or a girl, and in the very dim light of the bedroom, I thought it was a boy. But when I checked a second time, I realized we had a baby girl! I was so thrilled. I had always wanted two girls. But we had no idea what we were going to name her! We looked at the time and realized that the baby had been born about ten minutes before 11 pm, less than an hour and a half after I lost my plug. No wonder labor had been so intense! She came out pretty clean, with no vernix on her (just like R) but with quite a bit of blood on her head.

Around this time, my friends got back from their errands. They were shocked to see me with a baby already. I was so glad to see them, especially when they began cleaning up. About half an hour after the baby was born, I birthed the placenta. It came out but stayed attached by the membranes so it was hanging between my legs. I stayed squatting as long as I could, but the thing would not come out, so I got up on the bed to wait. During the next few hours I nursed, and rested as T and my friends cleaned up and called people and took care of R. E washed my feet off, and MC got most of the blood off the floor and started washing our towels. (I have good friends!) My mom came back over to see the baby as well.

I wanted to wait until the placenta was entirely out before cutting the cord, but after three hours I really had to pee. I tried to squat while T held the placenta behind me so I wouldn’t pee on it and MC held a bucket between my legs. (Really really good friends!) But every time I tried to do this, the baby would cry (I was holding her and she was still attached) and I couldn’t concentrate. Finally we decided to just go ahead and cut the cord. R had fallen asleep by this point, but had really wanted to cut the cord, so we tried to wake her up. It didn’t work, so we tied off the cord with some embroidery floss that MC had finger-weaved and cut it. I was still having trouble peeing while squatting over the bucket, and I couldn’t go to the toilet because of the placenta, so I decided to just pee on the chux pad. We had several underneath me, and I had peed when I lost my plug, so I thought it would be fine. Once I started peeing, however, fluid just gushed out of me and didn’t stop. MC was there, and we started laughing, and she asked me if my water had ever broken. I said, “Well, it must have, since she wasn’t born in the caul, but it never really gushed out.” She said, “This must be your waters because I don’t think this much pee is possible.” It filled two or three chux pads and then made a huge puddle on the floor. I think that the membranes must have been holding the waters inside until then. After everything got cleaned up, and E and my mom had left, MC called S (her dh) to come get J (her ds), who had been sleeping in the car the whole time, so that she could sleep on our couch until morning.

We decided to weigh and measure the baby, because she seemed smaller than R had been and I had been expecting this one to be bigger. We couldn’t believe it when she weighed ten pounds, and MC and T went running around finding things to weigh to make sure the scale was accurate. She measured 21 ½ inches long. We still didn’t have a name and none of the ones that we could remember from our list seemed to fit. MC went to go find our list, and we had forgotten that we put the name A on there. As soon as she reminded us, T and I looked at each other and realized that that was her name. We gave her the middle name K after my grandmother.

R woke up around 5:30, and came in to see her baby sister. I fell asleep, but T and R stayed up and cooked breakfast and hung out. My placenta seemed like it was detaching very, very slowly, but still hadn’t come out by midday. I posted a question about it on the unassisted childbirth thread at mothering.com. Everything else was perfect—my uterus was shrinking, I wasn’t bleeding a lot, the baby was nursing a ton—and I felt like I was just missing some little piece of knowledge that would help me out, but I didn’t feel like there was anything “wrong.” A midwife who posts to the thread a lot offered me her cell phone number and I called when it had been 24 hours. She told me I could sort of twirl the placenta around to make the membranes rope up, and then reach up inside and gently wiggle them back and forth until they released. I got off the phone and did this and it was out in about 5 minutes. I took some pictures and put it in the freezer to plant in the spring. I finally got a mirror to look at myself, and it appeared as if the vaginal tissue had sort of “fissured” or split in several places. I had no muscle tears, however, and after the first week of excruciating burning while peeing, things are healing up quite nicely.

This whole pregnancy and birth has been amazing for me. As good an experience as I had with R, I can’t believe it could get this much better. It was an amazing journey and I would never do it another way. The one thing I underestimated was how much I would appreciate help immediately post partum, and so I am incredibly grateful that my friends came back after the baby was born and that they knew exactly what to do to help out. I am so glad that my daughter got to witness the birth of her sister. I am so happy that I caught my own baby. I am filled with so much love for my family, my community, and my life, and I am truly blessed to be where I am in my life.
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#194 of 204 Old 12-01-2004, 12:20 AM
 
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What a wonderful birth story.

Ha! I bet your friends were shocked when they came back and you had already had the baby. WOW.

Thanks for sharing.
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#195 of 204 Old 12-01-2004, 12:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Congratulations DancerMom!! What a great story!!

Mama, homeschooler, midwife. DD (13yo), DS (11yo), DD (8yo), DD (3yo), somebody new coming in November 2013.

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#196 of 204 Old 12-01-2004, 12:20 PM
 
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Great stories! Thanks for sharing ladies and welcome to the new babes

Stacey
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#197 of 204 Old 12-01-2004, 12:58 PM
 
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What a wonderful birth story, Dancermom!! Thank you SO much for sharing it! As always I find the birth stories I read here to be the most inspiring.

Also, I want to thank Lafemmesdesfemmes, Sprinkle Pocket, and Dancermom for addressing my Plan B and Emergency Childbirth questions. Your repsonses have validated my thoughts and instincts -- and as always, I'm very grateful to all you mamas for sharing your wisdom.

Sprinklepocket -- I was touched by your post about your family (and believe me, I could relate!). I'm glad your plans were met with little resistance. I hope Christmas with your other relatives goes as well.

Niki -- I don't know if I said this already, but reading your post about the birth of your dd moved me to tears. It was beautifully bittersweet, and you're so articulate with your feelings and emotions. Just want you to know I'm thinking of you....

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#198 of 204 Old 12-01-2004, 05:45 PM
 
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I also don't want to think too much about what "might" happen because I don't want to start getting paranoind. Are there perhaps some things that are universal that one should be aware of? I feel like I've heard enough good stories of mama or papa reaching down and checking for the cord around baby's neck and I feel like I would intuit if I needed to do that. I have been wondering about checking for a cervical lip when I start feeling like pushing. Do most of you, or none of you, check for dilation? I don't know why but I am somewhat worried that I may feel like pushing and there will still be lip there. I guess this is why we "shouldn't" push and just let the baby sort of slip itself out ... Any great ideas??? Anyone have anything they feel is important to know? I also don't want to many "aids", mostly because I can't afford it and don't want to be left with lots of EO or homeopathic remedies I won't use for who knows how long again. Is there any one or two things that are really handy to have around, sort of all purpose helpers?

Lotus birth ~ has anyone who has done a lotus noticed if the baby seemed to be aware of the placenta or wanting to be near or touch it? My little one is transverse and I notice by the position that it seems like baby is hugging the placenta. I wonderered if baby was lonely in there and wanting someone to snuggle!
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#199 of 204 Old 12-02-2004, 09:23 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Well...it's December...

I'm not wanting to take care of the list anymore...if you want to but don't know how to deal with the links, PM me...

Mama, homeschooler, midwife. DD (13yo), DS (11yo), DD (8yo), DD (3yo), somebody new coming in November 2013.

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#200 of 204 Old 12-03-2004, 08:22 PM
 
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oh please, oh please, oh please can someone start a new thread, I have so much to talk about (one handed ) and i don't want it to get lost
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#201 of 204 Old 12-03-2004, 08:31 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KateSt.
Jenniebug -- You are so sweet! Thanks for the invite on Dec 10th! Fridays are never good for me, though. Perhaps we can meet for your next appt. I'd love that.

I have a question for you wise ladies. I've been skimming Emergency Childbirth and reading parts of it to dh, but instead of making us feel better it's making us a bit more paranoid. I don't want to focus too much on the things that could go wrong, I'd rather focus on the things that could go right. I'm thinking if I'm a bit ignorant about some of the things that could go wrong, they won't manifest in my mind, IFYKWIM? I'm all for having the book on hand, but I certainly don't want to read it anymore. Has anyone else taken this approach?

Also, has anyone else NOT had a Plan B? I read in one of the UC books that sometimes having a plan B means you're not fully commiting to Plan A. I've never been a plan B person -- thinking if I have nothing to fall back on, I'll make sure I"ll succeed. Any thoughts on this?

Thanks in advance! I missed you ladies over Thanksgiving!
Definetly i will have to schedule my next appt for a Thursday, Fridays are terrible for me too, not sure how i am going to make it awake to this appt lol

As for the EC book...I never read it. I did look up potential problems (such as a cord prolapse) just so I would know what to look for. Mostly I relied on my internal instinct and connection with the baby to tell me if something was wrong. We didn't even check the heartrate during labor as i felt I may misread the normal decels or even become disconnected from my inner source. Oh my that sounds kind of hokey doesn't it.

As far as a backup plan, it was stated that IF and only if we had a true emergency would we call for help. But in all honesty I am not sure I would have, depending on how i felt. It would be my first normal labor & delivery and having never actually expereinced it, I think it would have been difficlut to say oh this is an emergency or not. I had to rely 100% on my instincts. That was something let me tell you. I have never had so much trust and faith in my own body, truly a wonderous and magical thing it was.

Anyways I guess what I am saying is if the book is making you feel anxious and have fear, put it down! Fear can lead you the wrong way. If you need to read something to be prepared go borrow Childbirth without fear from saras...truly a good book even tho it is over 30yrs old lol
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#202 of 204 Old 12-03-2004, 09:07 PM
 
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Here's the new thread.

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...97#post2347497

Amy, I'm expecting a book from you!

Jennie :LOL I borrowed Childbirth Without Fear my last appt and have yet to return it, I love it so!!!!! Thanks so much for your input -- it helps so much!

computergeek2.gif  Spirit Baby Intuitive (and really cool chick)

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#203 of 204 Old 12-03-2004, 09:20 PM
 
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LOL I still have 2 books out that for some reason I just cant finish reading but yet cant return either. I really should put them back on the shelf as they seem to really rile my temper *sigh* They are good books, excellent books but everytime I read about the sorry sOB's and hospital tactics I just go into a rage. It also makes me want to become a very large and loud natural birth activist but I have no idea hwere to start.

heading over to the new thread :-)
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#204 of 204 Old 12-02-2006, 01:31 AM
 
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FYI: For small tears that sting while going potty, it is helpful to boil comfrey until the oils appear, then use in a peri bottle to squirt while going. This gives comfort. Loved your story, enjoy your babies for too soon they are grown. PEACE!!!!!!!!!!!
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