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Originally Posted by mama_nomad
And that I am dealing with, but I can't help this feeling i get when I hear about other moms having successful homebirths....i don't want to say jealousy but maybe it is....i am not familiar with that feeling. Everytime I hear a story, I just think "why not me??" I am not really down with the "everything happens for a reason theory..." because it doesn't mesh with my beliefs. I am doing the best with my situation but I wonder if other mom's out there have this feeling....?
Originally Posted by Joyce in the mts.
What is your will?
Do your will.
Joyce in the mts.
Originally Posted by Joyce in the mts.
You have my respect and my support whatever you choose, and indeed, whatever you choose...you will have a baby. EVERY choice has a result and consequence, no matter what you do.
Life itself- not to be glib or trite, but sincerely- is a gamble. There ARE no guarantees. Docs nor midwives, nor you nor me can really control anything. Best we can do is prepare for the best experience possible and have a backup plan and helpers that can help remind us who owns the experience no matter what or where it happens.
I have given birth at home and in a hospital. My kids are grown. Truly anything could have happened in either place.
I wish you well as you continue to work things through for yourself.
I believe in you, trust you and support you.
Joyce in the mts.
Originally Posted by MANA Statement of Values and Ethics
I. Woman as an Individual with Unique Value and Worth:
B. We value a woman's right to make choices regarding all aspects of her life.
II. Mother and Baby as Whole:
A. We value the oneness of the pregnant mother and her unborn child - an inseparable and interdependent whole.
III. The Nature of Birth:
B. We value pregnancy and birth as natural processes that technology will never supplant.3 (3. Supplant means to supersede by force or cunning; to take the place of.)
D. We value pregnancy and birth as personal, intimate, internal,4 sexual and social events to be shared in the environment and with the attendants a woman chooses. (4. In this context internal refers to the fact that birth happens within the body and psyche of the woman. Ultimately she and only she can give birth.)
F. We value pregnancy and birth as processes which have lifelong impact on a woman's self esteem, her health, her ability to nurture, and her personal growth.
IV. The Art of Midwifery:
F. We value skills which support a complicated pregnancy or birth to move toward a sate of greater well-being or to be brought to the most healing conclusion possible. We value the art of letting go. 6 (6. This addresses our desire for an uncomplicated birth whenever possible and recognizes that there are times when it is not possible. For example, due to problems with the birth, a woman may be least traumatized to have a surgical delivery. If a spontaneous vaginal birth is not possible, then we let go of that goal in order to achieve the possibility of a healthy mother and baby. Likewise, the situation where parents choose to allow a very ill, premature or deformed infant to die in their arms rather than being subjected to multiple surgeries, separations and ICU stays. This too, is a letting go of the normal for the most healing choice possible within the framework of the parent's ethics given the circumstances. What is most healing will, of course, vary from individual to individual.)
G. We value the acceptance of death as a possible outcome of birth. We value our focus as supporting life rather than avoiding death.7 (7. We place the emphasis of our care on supporting life (preventive measures, good nutrition, emotional health, etc.) and not pathology, diagnosis, treatment of problems, and heroic solutions in an attempt to preserve life at any cost of quality.)
V. Woman as mother:
A. We value a mother's intuitive knowledge of herself and her baby before, during and after birth.8 (8. This addresses the medical model's tendency to ignore a woman's sense of well-being or danger in many aspects of health care, but particularly in regard to her pregnancy.)
B. We value a woman's innate ability to nurture her pregnancy and birth her baby; the power and beauty of her body as it grows and the awesome strength summoned in labor.
C. We value the mother as the only direct care provider for her unborn child.9 (9. This acknowledges that the thrust, of our care centers on the mother, her health, her well-being, her nutrition, her habits, her emotional balance and, in turn, the baby benefits. This view is diametrically opposed to the medical model which often attempts to care for the fetus/baby while dismissing or even excluding the mother.)
VI. The Nature of Relationship:
D. We value the concept of personal responsibility and the right of individuals to make choices regarding what they deem best for themselves. We value the right to true informed choice, not merely informed consent to what we think is best.
Originally Posted by Arwyn
Don't be afraid to be selfish.
Here are some quotes you might appreciate:
I've bolded some of the areas I think might be most appropriate for you.
I encourage you to read the entire document and meditate (or whatever you do to think profoundly) on what it has to say and how it relates to your situation. MANA Statement of Values and Ethics
Also, PP (while I was typing this) are offering great advice and profound wisdom. Just to throw my two cents in.
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